Patient: Glenda audio file pre-admissions Admitted: August 5th 2085
I'm fine to lay down, in fact I am desperate to lay down, exhausted, my body burns, my head is throbbing. I can feel blood tearing my veins to shreds. You think its August the fifth 2085, but for me that was two years ago. I remember well, I came here for help months previous to that or this date depending on your point of view. Bad dreams, it began with bad dreams. The same dream recurring night after night. A cube dividing and dividing, growing around me, a tesseract, the divisions mutated and shifted continually,
like windows or mirrors revealing or reflecting so many realities, so many places and so many times. I disappeared into the darkness as the monster grew, I was nothing, no one. Surreal visions that haunt me today or perhaps in two years time, I'm not sure any more.
I left work, I loved my job teaching Religious Philosophy. I always believed in God as the source of all matter. Everything emanating from one single spark of hope or loneliness and multiplying, spreading to form an imperfect universe. My breathing stopped during sleep several times. Chronic fatigue the doctors said and they signed me off of work.
Days and days I would lay in bed unable to move, however light it was I was surrounded by darkness and the nightmares, those terrible nightmares, I felt so small and insignificant, burdened with weariness.
Slowly I improved, each day was a struggle but after a time I could occasionally get out of bed, walk around and eat a little. These sessions didn't help, you couldn't help me because you didn't believe me. You thought I was crazy, delusional or hallucinating. I was telling you the truth, or rather I am telling you the truth.
The first time this...thing happened to me it was early, I had slept well and woken up at sunrise maybe in June or July. Scorching sun blazed through our windows, sweat bubbles poured off of me. I turned to my husband, as you know we had grown apart. He couldn't cope with my ill health. He had his back to me. I remember stroking him, hoping he would turn to me, but he didn't. I felt faint, the listlessness dragging me down, a spinning sensation and it was as if I sunk through the mattress.
I wasn't in bed any more. There was no sun, the moon was high spreading its glow on the waves. My dad was there, he was young again. I was smaller, a child, my younger self.
Terrified, I begged my dad to listen to me, begged him to hear who I was or when I was. He picked me up, held me, but I could tell that he thought I was daydreaming or that I had watched a scary film. Sorry, I'm so tired I need to stop for a minute...........
It was so brief, mere minutes it seemed, and I was back in my bed being violently ill. The sickness lasted two days, but the memory of that first encounter is just etched into my brain. After the sickness the fatigue returned and then receded once again. Within a month I experienced encounters daily, not just from childhood, encounters with my past before childhood, past lives. I don't even know if it’s my past life or a random link to another human. I do know that on this date, today's date you had me institutionalized.
I was incoherent, babbling. Today, now, in two years time, I have a chance to make you listen. In the institution I will be given a series of experimental and psychotropic drugs, I'm in a coma right now. I know I'm dying. I know that what's happening to me is real.
You don't need to do this, I learn, at least to an extent, how to manipulate the encounters. I only get one chance though to visit any room in that cube. This is my only chance to convince you not to make that phone call, otherwise I will die in that place, this place. I am so tired, so heavy.......
Calson Press Release 13th September 2090
Client: Mrs Gloria Langhan Patient Reference: Glenda Admitted: Mr Johnathan Langan
Date of Admission: August 5th 2085 Today's Date:September 13th 2090 FAO: LA Police Department
Report for press release: The Chronos-phrenia patient known as 'Glenda' died today after spending three years in a coma. The Institute sends its sympathies to the family and is working closely with the Department of Physics to gain a better understanding of this rapidly spreading condition.
Note scribbled by Mr A. Einstein Princeton, New Jersey
April 18th 1955
Gloria, my greatest inspiration, if only we had more time!
Sanguine Fervour
You're welcome in! I've seen you....In my dreams, as in life,
Echoing the velvet onyx abyss of your soulless heart
and sweetly enshrouded with the eternal stench of history's charm.
The doors, portcullis to my chamber, lay stark wide permitting pure precipitation to flood the ivory gateway in readiness for your empowering presence.
I recline as the embers cool....
The oak clock clangs breaking the deftly silence of my creamy satin nest. The sound ceases filling my body with fear and anticipation.
Momentary ambivalence,
A desperate urge to fight the mesmeric stupor, to shut you out!
But my desire enforces paralysis and there with aching trepidation I lay.
Nubile and motionless the emerald flecks of my eyes meet your black stare, Your gaze pierces me as you materialise from nothingness;
Tall, foreboding, pale with a mane of Earthly hair.
As you approach your cognitive grip tightens, our psyches coalesce!
I see your depravities; Death displaces desire and torture is thrust upon idolaters. Still, I want you! That is your power.
I surrender my life to you even as your deathly, ice lips caress mine,
Unable to overcome the sense of depravity triggered by that loathsome longing, I hesitate, in an acknowledgement of reticence your eyes.
Your stunning, seductive eyes stare into mine.
In deep swoon I am willed to relax, to fall into a waking reverie filled with a sense of peace, beset by your refuge.
Then, in a climactic instant your canines penetrate my chastity draining my life's fluid and my world sinks into an obscure dusk...... Sweet sleep excludes the brilliant sun.
My only stirrings emanate from our minds merging.
Locked behind the bars of your malevolence I see victims cruelly slain, Solely for knowing you and you watch me gazing in.
An eternal parasite cursed; Darkness, solitude and damnation.
An emptiness crying out for pity, the demon within judged for its deeds, Fuelling its anger and passions, driving a desire that may never be sated.
My soul builds a resistance to the disease and I implore you for a reprieve with no compassion my sanctuary is denied and once again you appear.
With a Tiger's strength I draw myself from that lust filled place of rest.
Stumbling, dazed and weak my feet tread stone villa floors. Even in my escape I am drawn to you.
Your whispers tremor through me as I desert on my steel stead.
Your imploring tones willing my return, fighting with memories of the beloved you stole now just us alone in a crowded universe.
Hastily I travel through the mountain pass, mere shapes silhouetted in the dark.
My mind in turmoil and my body hungering for yours the cool night breeze pierces my skin, I lose control!
In a flash of metal and light my mortal flesh is broken like porcelain, my skin ripped, my spirit weary bidding me to sleep through the trauma.
I feel you holding me like the lover you can never be, moving me, time passes...
You tend me with a callous cherishing,
Healing your prey to make it fit once again for the hunt!
And with gruesome degradation you feed me from your own veins and with grotesque wantonness I submit to your offering.
Overawed by the eroticism, aphrodisia and sensuality. Your silent, false promise that you will shield me forever. In that moment of bliss I give myself to you!
You make the pain stop! You satisfy your own thirst!
Frozen air sneaks through the derelict boards.
I wake in an abode that has haunted my dreams, slumped coldly on chilled steps, The crimson warmth of days passed replaced by d
amp rot and sombre shade.
Solitude perforates my empyrean blood. Loss of my kin has broken my fire,
A life once so learned, travelled and communal destroyed.
You are all I have, my vengeance quelled by an unnatural proclivity, To be yours eternally,
To be loved and subjugated equally, but your heart does not beat!
I am here at your will, forced to choose as you wish punished with desolation and debility,
Infected by your fluids, which dominate my clay.
Timorously I call your name and there aloof at the window crevice, You materialise as if there you had always been,
I beg for release from your enchantment,
To forget this agonising cry from the depths of my being, Your numb stare repudiates my appeal.
My choices are narrowed; annihilation or eternal perdition, Everlasting surrender to your sovereignty,
Lacerated through your necessary infidelity.
An assassin afflicted with immortality's curse
and yet with these apprehensions you still captivate me.
Unable to bear being abandoned in this weakened state I come to you.
I rise as you wish,
I stroke your dreadful shell succumbing to your carnality, Your claws clasp my soft curls and the kiss you offer blazes.
Gnarled nails trail my throat, easing the silken slip strings from my shoulders, ivory points encircle my lips, cheeks, hair and throat,
The puncture stings with libidinous relief ebbing with each gulp.
My senses heighten, I energise and in a moment of clarity I draw from you, Night escapes leaving the scarlet sun dawning slowly,
Before the last trickle of humanity evades me I break away....