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  Chapter 4: No dreams

  February 12, 2007

  It has been a while since I have had a dream. I know I wanted to use this diary to report all my dreams and to keep a “diary”, if you will, of all of them. But since I haven’t had any dreams lately and I was sitting here in my room kind of bored, I just decided to write a little bit.

  It is weird that I haven’t had a dream though because I really loved the experience last time. Don’t you just hate it when that happens? Every time you want something or that you are looking for something, you never find it? Yet, usually, when you stop looking for it, it just pops in front of you. I don’t know about you, but it just happens to me all the time. I just have to stop searching some times in order to find what I want. I don’t know if it is some trick God plays on us, or if there is actually a reason for all of it.

  Now this might sound like a foolish idea, maybe a complicated one, and I don’t know if I will be able to explain it clearly. But here is why I think it happens: First and foremost, it is said that we create our own reality. Meaning that everything we think, goes into the universe somehow, and it is created. For example, let just say I have a positive mind about a test. I am thinking I am going to get an A and I already feel like I have an A. So that thought, that feeling goes into the universe, and it returns as a reality a little bit later, when I do get the A. But when I get it, I feel the same way I used to before I took the test, because it is that feeling coming back, it is my creation.

  So if any of this is actually true, it might also be true when we search for something. How? You are thinking you want it right? You are searching for it after all. But, the feeling you are sending to the universe is that of “I don’t have it.” Therefore, that feeling, that creation of “I don’t have this or that” will come back to you in reality, of still not having it. Now when we stop searching for it, in the back of our heads we still want it, but we are not sending the feeling anymore that we don’t have it. Therefore it comes later on.

  Oh and remember, this entire thing works even if you don’t believe in it. The mind is pretty powerful, whether you believe it or not. And this is not me writing more nonsense or craziness, the mind thing (about it being powerful) is actually scientifically proven. They have experimented with this. For example, there was this one time where they had ten patients in a hospital with the same condition. They said the same thing to all of them “We are going to operate.” They operated on five of them and they didn’t operate on the other five (although they thought they were, because they were taken to the E.R., etc etc.). Yet, by an act of “miracle”, they were all cured.

  I am not sure if I am making any sense here. Maybe I am just writing nonsense. If you come to think about it though, if you understood what I said, then it kind of has some logic behind it all. And don’t blame me for writing such crazy things; when you are sitting in your room with no TV or anything, it is easy to let your mind wonder. Though, it is interesting that my mind wonders more now that I have dreamt than when I didn’t dream at all…go figure.