Very true, damn it.
“But… she knows the risks?”
“Absolutely. And my magic will be with you both.” I gestured grandly, placing a small fog around him. Window dressing. Magic doesn’t work that way.
“Won’t that…”
“… interfere with the curse? No.” I was beginning to see why the curse lasted so long. He was trying desperately to hold on to the belief. Not his fault. He had two hundred years of history behind him. “Are you free tomorrow for dinner?”
“Yes.”
“She’ll meet you at the Oasis.”
“How will I know her?”
“She’ll know you.”
Not the most conventional way to make a date, but this was work.
Wasn’t it?
~|~
I looked at Jamie cat, who stared up at me. “Does this shirt look better, or this shirt?” She yawned, looked away, and laid down her head on her paws. “Right. Something else entirely.” I pulled out a gold lame. No, a bit too fancy. And my graduation wizard robes might give him the wrong impression, in addition to breaking my cover. In the end, I decided on a nice white shirt, cut fairly low, with a nice necklace. May as well look businesslike, darn it.
I drove to Oasis, which was a converted chain restaurant with a oasis theme… metal palms, plastic palms, and decent food at decent prices. No alcohol; I didn’t want either of us to get tipsy. I sat in the waiting room.
He was twenty minutes late. Poor man, he looked frazzled. Was he that desperate for a date?
Probably was.
I stood up and extended my hand. “Gregory Hill?”
“You must be Meg Cardiff.”
“Nice to meet you. Should we sit down?” On cue, the hostess came up to seat us.
The booths were deep and fairly private – another reason I had picked the restaurant. “My boss tells me you need a fiancé for a while.”
He looked at me with those nice deep green eyes.
“He seems to think it will break the family curse. But…” He looked down shyly, which I thought was sweet. “Are you all right with it?”
I shrugged. “If I weren’t, I wouldn’t be here.”
“So, I guess we should get to know each other before we get engaged. How long have you been a secretary for Mr. Jones?”
I had already set up personas for myself and “Merlin”, so I slipped into my role easily. “About six years. It’s been the most challenging job I’ve had yet.” I laughed. “I wondered a bit when I started when he asked whether unusual things threw me. You don’t expect a bookkeeper to have many unusual things happen.” Yes, among other things, I was a bookkeeper. Not a CPA, although I worked closely with my CPA. She was in on my little secret and I managed to throw work her way when I was too busy with my regular job. Annoyed her a bit, but I’ve learned quite a lot from her.
He dutifully laughed at my little joke.
“I understand you’re new in town.”
“Just transferred in to Armwick International. New Director of Personnel. The old one retired and they wanted to bring in fresh blood.” He sighed. “I’m as straight as they come, but all the ladies there think I’m gay.”
“Considering your dilemma, that’s not a bad thing for yourself and those ladies,” I said, a little frostily. He sounded a little insulting.
He looked appalled. “I didn’t mean to insult you.”
I smiled. “Not me. Just some of my friends.”
“Ah. Still.”
“Sweet of you to apologize, though.” It was. He wasn’t like most men of my acquaintance.
He read my mind. “I was raised by women. My dad died young. At least that wasn’t related to the curse.”
“Yeah?”
“Grandad lived to ninety.”
“Ah.”
We talked on about unrelated things until dessert. He was very easy to talk to and quite witty. Quite refreshing from most men.
He suddenly blushed and pulled out a ring box. “I suppose we should do this now.”
I smiled and batted my eyes. “Why, Mr. Hill! I’ve never had such a charming proposal!” I held out my hand. He fitted it onto the ring finger of my left hand, where it sat oddly. I looked at it closely. “Family heirloom?”
“I’m not sure. It was my Mom’s.”
“Ah.” I reached over on the table to peck him on the cheek. Our lips met. “Thank you,” I said, as we recoiled from each other.
A waitress slipped, sending a plate my way. I automatically slowed down time and caught the plate, handing it back to her in real time.
Gregory sat back, looking appalled. “It’s starting.”
I smiled. “Yep. It’s starting.”
~|~
In the next few days, I dodged two frying pans, three cars coming at me, a load of boards coming off a lumber truck, a kick by an Amish horse (and we usually don’t see the Amish in town), one brick, and one bottle. I did get pricked by a spinning wheel pin, but that was my fault. I couldn’t figure out what the spinning wheel was doing in front of my office door. I neutralized the poison in my finger. I’m no Sleeping Beauty.
Did I let Gregory know? Hell, no. In spite of the plate incident in the restaurant, my goal was to make him believe that the two hundred year old curse was over. Still, I couldn’t avoid him forever. So now the trick would be to defend myself without letting him see a thing. And I did want to see him. He was a sweet guy. I couldn’t say I loved him, but I certainly was in a bit of lust.
He picked me up at the office. I did a little song and dance and told him that “Merlin” was on vacation. I scanned his car, detected that the struts were about to crack and the brakes were going to go out and fixed them while I was sitting there, making small talk. Very possible that this was natural problem and not related to the curse. The car was well kept up, but a bit old.
As we drove to Kalamazoo, I scared off one deer, stopped three cars, and herded a couple of big-horn sheep to the side of the road. Gregory noticed the sheep and looked at me. I shrugged, then we both realized at the same time that we were passing the put-and-take hunting preserve. I snickered.
“Think we should call the police?” he said.
“Naw. Let them worry about it,” I said.
I saw a rock headed for the windshield and deflected it. “You know,” I said, “we should get married as soon as possible.” A car flew across the highway from Flowerfield Road. I slowed the car down so that it flew across right ahead of us.
Gregory paled, and I wasn’t sure whether it was because of the car or my suggestion. “Are you serious?”
I persuaded a hawk to go a different direction. “Serious.”
“When!?” That was definitely a panicked voice. Damn.
“ASAP.”
“Vegas?”
I thought about that a second. “That might be pressing our luck.”
“Plus the possibility taking a few people with us?”
“Still…” I thought. If the curse was external, it would try for us on the plane. If it was Gregory’s fault, not much would happen until we made it there.
I saw a movement in the back seat. There was a woman sitting there. I gasped slightly, then looked at her. She was dirty, she was wearing an old faded dress and she had a bullet hole through her abdomen. I looked at Gregory. “Do you see anything behind us?”
He looked around. “No.”
The woman smiled, then looked at me sadly, then disappeared. This was a new twist.
Nothing happened until we reached the restaurant. I was on edge, but tried to keep it from Gregory. He kept looking sideways at me – dumb, he ain’t. We ordered, and I excused myself to the bathroom, which was, unfortunately, full. So after I used the facilities, I went back to the table, grabbed my cell phone, using the excuse that I had seen something and had to call my “boss” for advice.
I walked out of the front door of the restaurant, opened my cell phone, pretended to di
al, and walked back to the parking lot. The woman appeared before me. “Madame Patience, I assume.”
“You assume correctly.”
I looked at her closely. She was younger than I imagined, yet older. I would imagine a hard twenty-five. Life was harder years ago.
“You’re haunting Gregory?”
She shrugged. “He’s the latest.”
I decided to come straight to the point. “Don’t you think you’ve tortured the family enough?”
She looked at me directly. She had light blue eyes and a sad expression. “I do.”
“Then…”
“I’m not allowed to stop.”
“What do you mean?”
She turned to look at the restaurant. “Excuse me,” she said. A rock flew at me, and I caught it, stinging my hand. “Sorry.”
“Have you killed all of those fiancés?”
“I have.” She started walking towards the wall. “I wasn’t sorry about the first one. She actually thanked me later.”
“Why?”
“My son – my dear son – was also James’s son. The shooting was not accidental. I was a shame to James, and even though I had moved to another town and claimed I was a widow, he couldn’t stand it.” She smiled sadly. “You would call him an abuser in these modern times.” She looked pensive. “In my dying breath, I cursed him – and damned myself.”
“Am I the first fiancé you’ve shown yourself to?”
“I tried, but they couldn’t see me.” She paused. “I’m not sure why you can.”
“So you killed…”
“So I killed the first ones, and the later ones were scared away or warned away by the young men themselves. And I know your secret. You’re not in love with him.” She looked at me closely. “Or are you?”
I couldn’t lie to this sad woman. “I’m in serious like.”
“I wouldn’t let it go any further.”
“Why?”
“He’ll treat you like James did me. A philanderer.”
I frowned. “Number one, Gregory is not James, and number two, I wouldn’t let him.”
“I believe you wouldn’t.”
“Then…”
“I will leave… can leave… when he forgives me.” She faded out. “Only then.”
Shit. How did I turn out to be a ghost whisperer?
~|~
I told him after we got back home. He looked at me, shocked. “Never.” He turned away and slammed his hand on a door frame.
I was only slightly shocked by his answer. I was actually more shocked at his violence. “Why?”
“I can never forgive her.”
“Why?”
“Because of the torture she’s caused my family.” He turned and looked at me, his face red.
Every man has his boiling point. Apparently I had met his. Made me happy I wasn’t a man. Except for those certain times of the month, I was fairly even-tempered.
Unfortunately, it was that time of the month.
“You have got to be kidding. She was the wronged one.”
“But she didn’t have to keep going on…”
“She had to. She had no choice.” A vase flew at me, and Gregory looked startled. “Still doesn’t.”
“She shouldn’t have made the curse in the first place.”
“Agreed. She agrees, too. She says she’s tortured the family enough.”
“Why hasn’t she shown herself before?”
I chewed my lip. The fiancés couldn’t see her, but I could. Magic. “I’m – not sure.” I looked away.
“Can you ask?”
“My boss? Um, yeah.”
“Can I see him?”
“He’ll tell you the same thing I did.”
“I still want to see him.”
I wanted to say, is forgiving so hard? Then I turned away. In my own experience, forgiving was hard.
I sighed. “I’ll send him by tomorrow.”
~|~
I drove back the next day, parking on the next street over, Sitting in the car, I transformed myself and my clothes. I heard a gasp from the back. “Witch!”
I scrunched up my face. “I prefer wizard. Wizardess, if you want to get technical.”
“I thought witches were evil.”
“In two hundred some years, you haven’t learned much.”
Patience shrugged. “I stay long enough to pick up the accent and the modern words, but I thought magic was a myth.”
“So are ghosts.”
She stayed silent.
“Witches are evil.”
“I go to church, honey.”
“Some churchgoers are evil.”
She had me there. “I try to help people. I pray to the Lord.” I shrugged myself. “I know other Christian wizards, Jewish wizards, Muslim wizards. I even know some Wiccan wizards and some atheist wizards.” I can’t figure out the atheist wizards – where do they think there power comes from? – but I didn’t say that out loud. “Even a couple of Amish. Although they just learned enough to keep it under control. They never use it.”
“Can you say the Lord’s prayer? I've heard that those who follow Satan cannot say the Lord's prayer.”
“Of course,” I got out of the car. Actually, that myth wasn't true, but I wasn't going to tell Patience that. “Can I say it while we walk? Transformation spells take a lot of strength.”
I started walking down the sidewalk. “Our Father –“ a branch came at me --- “who art in heaven” – a rock – “hallowed be thy name—“ another branch. “Thy kingdom come, thy will be done—“ a rain of pebbles and rocks --- “On earth as it is in Heaven.” I paused, but nothing happened. “Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts – “ A tire came after me, Heavens only knows where from – “as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not to temptation” --- where did that pie come from – “but deliver us from evil.” I deftly stepped over the branch that fell into my path. “For thine is the power and the glory and the kingdom, Forever. Amen.”
Silence.
“Do you want a ‘Hail Mary?’ I’m Presbyterian, but I know it.”
“I believe you.”
“Can you stop the sabotage for a moment?”
She faded away, and I sighed, walked up the porch, and rang Gregory’s doorbell. He answered, then looked surprised.
“I understand,” I said gruffly, “that you’ve been ignoring the advice of my secretary.”
Gregory looked a little taken aback. “No, sir. She asks that I do something that I can’t do.”
“Forgive Patience.”
He stood aside so that I could enter, then followed me quietly into his living room.
“I can’t. It makes me too angry.”
“And she can’t stop hurting you until after you forgive her.” I stared at him under bushy eyebrows. “I see. You don’t wish to marry.” I paused for dramatic effect. “Moreover, you wish to condemn your brother’s oldest – Alex, Jr. – to a life of bachelorhood.”
Gregory’s eyes pleaded with me. “No. I can’t.”
I opened my mouth and closed it, as a sudden realization came over me. Not “I don’t” but “I can’t”. He literally can’t. I sat back. “Tell me, Mr. Hill, how do you fell about family legacies?”
He relaxed. “Sometimes, they’re not like we would want them to be.”
I stroked my beard. “I understand. I believe."
"Do you, sir?"
I left with an odd feeling.
A family geis. Oh. A family geis by James. James cursed Patience back, and Gregory couldn’t refer to it directly.
Makes sense. That would be part of why the curse lasted so long.
This was definitely going to take some tricky work.
~|~
Tricky, smicky. What I had in mind was almost impossible. Ghost lore was not one of my majors — I concentrated on transformation spells and telekinesis and spell casting, with an emphasis in
psychology. Especially psychology. Half of spell casting is belief, the other half misdirection, and one really doesn’t want the client to believe the wrong things, even if you’re working for good – so I had a bit of re-learning to do. Finally, I saw my solution in a half-remembered text.
Possession.
I sat back in satisfaction, then leaned forward towards the book.
“No.”
I gasped, sat bolt upright, and turned around. “Don’t do that.”
“The shock might kill you?” Patience smiled. "I don't need to throw things?"
I smiled back. “No. But I have an idea that might stop this.”
She looked over my shoulder at the text. “I don’t like where you’re going with this…”
“You don’t have to like it. But I think it’ll work.”
A bit of hope came into her eyes.
~|~
Gregory opened the door. “Hi.”
“Hi.”
“Come in.” He looked slightly abashed. “Did Mr. Jones send you back?”
“No.” I had to concentrate on walking. This balancing of my spell was the hardest thing I’ve had to do yet.
“Well, he said the same thing, and I had the same answer.”
I sat on his sofa. “I see. So I was right?”
“Yes.”
“So that’s why you got mad at me?” I knew that wasn’t it, but I needed an answer.
“No.” He got up and paced the floor. “I don’t know why I get so angry when the subject comes up.” He looked at me sharply. He knew.
“It comes up often?” I grinned.
“No.” He looked at me intently. NOW! I pushed her forward. “I’m sorry,” Gregory said.
Was that enough of an apology? I could feel exultation, and I started speaking. “I accept your apology.” Patience then separated from me, and from Gregory’s glance, I knew that he could see her. “And I forgive James. You and I are free.” She started glowing, then faded.
“Huh?” Gregory looked at the spot where Patience used to be.
I grinned ironically. “I let Patience possess me. You just apologized to Patience. The curse is over.”
“But… that’s not what I intended.”
“You said the words.”
“But.” Gregory shut himself up, then sat for a moment. “I apologized to Patience on behalf of my ancestor.” He looked surprised. “I can say the words! I couldn’t before.”
“I know. So I figured you could say them to me, even though your intention was something else entirely.”
“That seems a little…”
“Tricky?”
“Underhanded.”