Maybe it’s time to stop being so afraid of it.
As they walked back across the huge field that led to their house, she said quietly, “Jace, remember when you were asking about your father?”
Jace looked up at her hopefully. “Is he coming here? Is he coming to see me?”
Melanie stopped walking, bent, and took her son’s hands in hers. “No, honey. He can’t. He’s up in heaven.”
Disappointment darkened hers son’s expression as he tried to understand. “With Sandy?” Jace asked, connecting death with the only experience he had with it—the dog he’d grown up with and lost a year ago.
“Yes, he’s with him.”
“I’ll pray for him just like you taught me to for Sandy,” he said quietly, and Melanie’s heart clenched painfully in her chest.
Melanie hugged her son to her. “You do that.” She released him and stood, afraid that if they stayed on this topic too long, he’d see her cry. “But your father’s parents are alive and they want to come see you. Would you like that?”
“Will they bring me presents?” he asked.
Melanie sniffed, smiled, took him by the hand, and started walking toward their house again. “I’m sure they will.”
“Will they bring me my own TV?” he asked, once again sounding hopeful.
“No, because you’re still too young to have one in your room,” Melanie said with finality. He’d been asking for his own television ever since he started kindergarten and one of his friends told him that he had his own.
“I bet they’d bring me a puppy if I asked for one,” Jace said.
Melanie sighed. “Didn’t we talk about why getting a puppy is not a good idea right now? I’ll be taking classes. You’re in school. What would we do with a puppy?”
Jace looked up at her with enormous, soulful eyes and said, “He’d sleep with me. I’d take good care of him. I’d train him to wait for me on the porch like Sandy used to.”
Melanie appealed to the sky for support but none came. She gazed back down at her son’s pleading expression and partially caved. “Well, maybe we can start looking.”
With a whoop of joy, Jace jumped. “Kenny said his dad said we could have one of their puppies for free because they’re too old to sell. His dog is super smart, Mama. Can we go see them right now? Can we?”
“Tomorrow, Jace. We don’t have anything for a puppy. We’d have to go shopping in town for supplies.”
“We can go when I get home. I can’t wait to tell Kenny you said yes.”
“I didn’t—” Melanie started to say, then stopped herself. I’ll just count myself lucky that all he asked for was a puppy. Good thing he doesn’t know that I would have said yes to almost anything today.
Inside the house, Jace followed her to the kitchen instead of running off to his toys as he usually did. “Do they like puppies?”
“Who, honey?” Melanie asked as she opened the refrigerator and took out a bowl of salad.
“My grandparents.”
Melanie closed the refrigerator and lowered herself to her knees in front of her son. “I have a feeling they will love whatever you love.”
“Will I have to hug them?”
“Only if you want to.”
“Do they ride horses?”
“I don’t know.”
“Grandpa is a good rider. He races me even though Grandma tells him not to.”
Melanie smiled, wondering what her father would think of that claim to fame. “Well, when you meet your other grandparents, you can ask them if they’ve been around horses.”
“I might love them even if they say no.”
Melanie stood and ruffled her son’s hair. “That sounds like a good idea. Now go wash your hands and help me set the table.”
“But I—”
“You heard me.” Her son went off to wash his hands.
Once he was out of the room, she sat back against the counter. Jace now knew about his father and his grandparents. It certainly wouldn’t be the last conversation they had about either topic, but it had gone better than she’d dared hope it would.
Minus the puppy.
But I’m only human.
The more Melanie faced the past, the stronger she felt.
What would Charles say if I called him and told him that I miss him?
Would he rush here to see me?
Or would he politely explain that he’s already moved on?
“Mama, don’t be mad . . . but I dropped a towel in the toilet,” Jace called from the downstairs bathroom.
Melanie rushed down the stairs. She looked into the empty basin. “Where is it?”
Jace turned red and shrugged. “It went away when I flushed. Now the water is coming up instead of going down.”
Shaking her head, Melanie dialed David’s phone number. He merely chuckled when she told him the situation and said he’d be right over.
What would Charles have said if I’d called him for assistance? She couldn’t imagine him fishing in the toilet for an elusive towel. He didn’t know the first thing about kids.
Nor did I, before Jace.
She thought about how she’d almost called Charles earlier and decided she was glad that she hadn’t.
Is this really what New York’s most eligible bachelor is craving? A ready-made family? This crazy life? Me?
Chapter Fifteen
A few weeks later, Melanie stood with her son on the porch of their house. She’d changed her outfit twice already and was tempted to change it again. She’d started the day defiantly in jeans, then switched into a simple cotton dress she’d hoped would make a better impression.
They aren’t coming to see me.
Jace was in his usual jeans and plaid shirt, with boots and a cowboy hat. He was a miniature of the men he’d known and was proud of it.
Melanie looked at her watch, reminding herself to breathe, and saw that it was three minutes past the hour the Joneses had said they would arrive.
Please be reasonably sane.
Don’t be the type to say things that Jace is too young to understand.
Don’t rush him.
Don’t dismiss him.
Just love him and be someone he can love.
Please.
“You think they’re coming, Mama?” Jace asked, squinting as he looked down the long dirt driveway.
They’d better be. “Of course they are.”
Jace took out a piece of construction paper he’d folded up and stuffed into his pocket. It was wrinkled and torn, but he smoothed it out on the railing. “I made them a card. Want to see it?”
Melanie looked over her son’s shoulder and felt her chest swell. Sometimes he was such the independent little man. “I would love to.”
On the front there was a drawing of two stick figures, one tall and one short. “That’s me and you.”
Melanie cleared her throat and said, “I love my third eye.”
Jace smiled. “That’s a freckle. I like freckles on girls.”
Melanie nodded solemnly. Jace pointed to a cloud he’d drawn and colored with a white crayon. “That’s where my dad is. You can’t see him because he’s in heaven. And you can’t see Sandy because Sandy is with him.”
“It’s beautiful.”
He opened the card. He had drawn four stick figures on the inside. “That’s you, me, and my new grandparents. I didn’t give them faces because I don’t know what they look like yet.”
“That makes perfect sense.”
He pointed to the cloud. “The cloud is smiling because my dad is happy to see his parents. And I’m smiling because I am, too.” He folded the card up again and stuffed it back into his pocket. “Do you think they’ll like it?”
Melanie ruffled her son’s hair. “They’ll love it.”
“If they come. Lyle says his dad doesn’t always come when he says he will. He’s too busy. Maybe my grandparents are too busy today.”
“They’ll be here,” Melanie assured him. God, please let them be on t
heir way. She took out her phone and considered calling them, but they were only ten minutes late. Ten of the longest minutes of her life late.
A black sedan turned up the driveway, and Jace ran down the front steps, then stopped. He looked back at his mother, unsure if he should return to her side or run to the car. Tibby, their new pup, bounded around the side of the house covered with mud from the backyard.
“Tibby!” Melanie called and rushed down the steps.
Tibby was running circles around Jace. Beyond them an older couple was getting out of the dark vehicle. The man was tall and average in build, dressed in tan khakis and a light blue button-down shirt. He had Jace’s eyes and a dignified mop of salt-and-pepper hair. His wife was dressed in a cream-colored skirt and blouse, with her straight brown hair perfectly tied back from her face in a loose bun. She could have graced a style magazine cover.
Melanie made a grab for the dog’s collar, but he dropped playfully onto his elbows, then darted away to chase a bird in the grass. Torn between chasing Tibby and greeting the older couple, Melanie forgot to worry about either when she looked down at her son. He was suddenly all eyes and shy. He stepped back from his grandparents and clung to Melanie, burying his face in her stomach, and his hat fell to the ground behind him.
Todd’s parents walked over and Mr. Jones held out his hand. “Thank you for inviting us, Melanie.”
Mrs. Jones bent down to Jace’s level and said, “You must be Jace. We came a long way to meet you.”
Jace lifted his head and looked at her shyly. “Mama said you came from Greece.”
The older woman smiled at her grandson and nodded. “We did. We have a house there, but when we heard about you we wanted to come see you.”
His grandfather picked up Jace’s hat and brushed it off. “You might want this.”
“Thank you, sir.” Jace took the hat, crushing it between him and his mother when he turned away again.
Melanie placed her hand on her son’s head and smiled at her guests. “You two must be parched. Why don’t you come inside and we’ll get you a lemonade?”
“That would be very nice,” Jace’s grandfather said.
Melanie turned and started to lead the way toward the house when Tibby flew around the corner of the house again and beelined it for Jace’s grandparents as if they had just that second arrived. He barked at them happily, then jumped up and left two large mud footprints on Jace’s grandmother’s cream-colored skirt.
Melanie gasped and rushed forward, this time catching the dog before he could skirt away. “I’m so sorry,” she apologized.
Jace froze and his eyes doubled in size as he waited for her reaction. Part of Melanie wanted to scoop him up and protect him, but she knew she needed to give their relationship a chance.
After trying unsuccessfully to wipe the paw prints off, Jace’s grandmother looked across to her husband and said, “Do you remember the puppy you bought Todd? The one I told you I didn’t want?”
Her husband smiled at the memory. “The one who loved to dig up your flowers?”
“And then jump all over me. I used to get so upset.” Tears welled from her eyes. “I miss that stupid dog.”
Her husband walked over and hugged her. “I do, too.”
Jace studied the couple carefully. “You like dogs?”
His grandmother bent down again and looked him straight in the eye. “I love them.”
“My dad had a dog?”
His grandfather joined the conversation with a smile. “He did.”
Jace dug in his pocket for the card he’d made. He pulled it out and smoothed it on his leg, then showed it to his grandmother. Melanie couldn’t hear everything he said, but her heart swelled with love for the couple when she saw Jace’s grandfather straighten and blink quickly. His eyes shone with emotion when he looked over Jace’s head and mouthed, “Thank you.”
The regret she’d clung to for so long was replaced by a burst of hope.
I could love these people.
And so could my son.
We’re going to be okay.
Chapter Sixteen
Charles picked up the magazine June had placed on his desk that morning and flipped it open to the page she’d marked with a folded paper that sported a round smiley face. He’d made the list, “The Fifty Most Influential People in Manhattan,” and his bank account mirrored that accomplishment. Landing the Rawlings account had breached an invisible ceiling between him and those with real money to invest.
Which will make me even richer.
He threw the magazine in the trash beside his desk. Instead of hurting his business, his Internet video had brought him a level of celebrity that people in his line of work typically didn’t experience. People wanted to know the story of how he’d met his equally famous “cowgirl.” Perhaps because neither of them had stepped forward with an interview, the press had run with their own versions and the story resurfaced now and then. There was even a trending YouTube fruit sitcom loosely based on them in which Melanie was played by a feisty apple and he by a bitter grapefruit.
And the initial video that should have faded into obscurity was now part of the Unleashed, Unchained tour. The rock band rereleased the song they’d paired with the video as a single and was donating part of the funds raised to youth centers in New York City. Charles had negotiated for a portion of the profit to be awarded to Tanner and had tried to set up an account fund for him, but because he was a ward of the state, doing so had proved to be tricky. For the time being, Charles was putting Tanner’s share aside, to fund to him when he aged out of family services.
Charles’s phone line lit up. June said, “It’s Mr. Thorne, sir. Are you available for his call?”
“Put him through.” Once he heard his friend click on, he said, “I’m surprised you didn’t ring my cell.”
“I like to see how flustered your secretary gets when she knows it’s me. Is that wrong?” Mason asked.
“Yes.” But not surprising. Charles looked up at the ceiling and reflected on how patient his secretary had been with him over the past few months. Throwing himself into work had meant her time at the office had also increased, and he wasn’t positive he’d always been nice to her during the push. Maybe a raise for her was appropriate. “Next time you come to my office, bring her flowers. I don’t want to lose her. Not too many flowers. I also don’t want you to sleep with her because—let me repeat myself—I don’t want to lose her.”
“One sorry-your-boss-is-an-asshole-but-please-don’t-think-this-is-a-come-on bouquet coming right up. Sounds interesting. I like a challenge. Back to why I called. You did it. You hit the top fifty. What’s the mood like in your office? Champagne? Streamers?” He lowered his voice. “Strippers?”
Charles sighed. “Yes, it’s a party with wall-to-wall naked women. I ordered five but they sent fifty. I’m giving them out as party favors.”
“I’ll be right over,” Mason joked back. Then, more seriously, he asked, “You realize this is a good thing, right? You can sound happy about it.”
Charles stood and stretched, putting Mason on speakerphone. “I am happy about it,” he said defensively.
“Did you call your parents?” Mason asked.
“No.”
“Did you call your sister?”
“Not yet.”
“Should I fly in and drag your ass out tonight?”
“No, I have a college fair I need to go to.”
“For that kid? You still see him every week?”
“Yeah, it’s important to him.” Then he admitted, “Important to me.” Charles paced in front of his desk. “In some ways I’ve helped him. In others, I’ve made it harder for him. He’s a bright kid, just angry. He doesn’t belong in a group home. No kid does, really. But I see real potential in him. He’d do better if he stopped sabotaging himself.”
“You’re not considering adopting this kid, are you? I don’t want to be the bearer of unwelcome reality here, but he might think he won the lottery with y
ou. You’ll adopt him, then he’ll kill you in your sleep. It happens all the time.”
“Really? All the time?”
“If you don’t think so, you don’t watch the same documentaries I do. Scary shit.”
“I’m not adopting anyone. Besides, he’s almost an adult.”
“You say that, but I haven’t believed a word you’ve said in months. I don’t know what happened to you. Oh wait, I do. Melanie.”
“This has nothing to do with her.”
“Right, and the sun doesn’t rise in the East.”
“I haven’t spoken to her in three months.”
“Because you’re stubborn. Not because you don’t want to.”
There was the crux of lying to a good friend—it never worked. “I called her several times when she left. What was I supposed to do, fly out there? Drag her back here? Beg her to forgive me for something I didn’t do?”
“Man, you are in a bad place. Two of your three suggestions sound reasonable. The other one might land you in prison.”
“For all I know, she found Jace’s father and is now living with him.”
“But you won’t know that unless you go see her.”
“If I go to Texas, I’m not leaving without her.”
Mason groaned. “That does not sound like a man who has moved on. How about toning it down just a tad and asking her out on a date?”
“I don’t want to date her, Mason.” He slapped both hands down on the table as he finally vocalized the feelings he’d been holding in. “I want her here with me. I’ll marry her if that’s what it takes. It doesn’t matter anymore that she has a kid. I don’t care.”
Before Charles had a chance to hang up, Mason said quickly, “One last piece of advice? Work on your delivery. I hear everyone down there has a shotgun. I’d miss you.”
In Tony’s living room, with Jace at her side, Melanie shyly held up the letter documenting how well she’d done her first semester back in college. She wasn’t used to having attention focused on her, but Sarah had organized the dinner in her honor and had asked her to show off her grades.
Not much about the past few months had been easy, but she had forged through and come out the other side. She’d taken a job at a convenience store in town that offered her flexible shift hours so she could be home when Jace wasn’t in school. She was slowly paying Tony back for the initial investment in her education. And although she was tired, she felt better about herself than she had in a very long time.