Unfair
2 different perspectives of 13 year old girls
Copyright 2013 by Elizabeth Lamb
Amy - A short life
Amy
I'll just stay here and die I guess. I’ll just slip out of the world bit by bit, bit by bit until there is nothing left. That would be nice, wonderful in fact. Just beautiful. As I open my eyes my mind is spinning all I can hear is my name being called over and over again. "Amy, Amy, Amy" Then I realize I'm still living. Alive. I close my eyes again and fall back into a deep sleep.
Mum
Amy is back. Alive. She fought very hard not to. I'm the only one that can see that. As she gave up fighting and opened her eyes all the doctors and nurses were over the moon. But I saw the sadness and frustration in her eyes. Showing me how badly she wants to let go. I keep trying to tell her 'life is a gift not a privilege' but she just blocks me out. She wants to let go stop the treatment but who wouldn't. She's thirteen... with cancer...
Dad
It has been so scary to see our little girl fall further out of our grasp bit by bit, bit by bit. The doctors and nurses say she won’t live to see her thirteenth birthday with the wanting to die attitude.
My little girl. Dead. I couldn't think of it. We need to get her thinking what it would be like for us, without her. Especially her brothers. They love her so much. She has to live.
The big brother Alex
Mum and Dad keep acting like Ollie and I haven't heard anything, even though they know all too well that I have. Ollie hasn't heard anything and anyway, if he had he wouldn't have understood. He's only four. He wouldn’t know what Mum and Dad were talking about if it slapped him in the face.
Well unlike Ollie, I’m thirteen and I understood what the doctors said. I understood it all...
Dad
I know all too well that Alex knows something. I saw him lurking by the door. I thought he was waiting for us to finish as he was listening to his IPod. Well I thought he was listening to it. How was I to know he didn't have anything playing?! That he could hear our every word. Every single word. I can't believe we leaked it out to him. Bit by bit, bit by bit.
The little brother Ollie
I may be only four but I’m not stupid. Mummy and Daddy have a secret that they are hiding from me. I know Amam (Amy) is really very sick. I know that. But I’m going to make her better with all my hugs and kisses. Bit by bit, Bit by bit...
Amy
'Beep, beep, beep, beep' that’s what I go to sleep to and sadly in the morning, I wake up to it too. If you're wondering what the noise is, it's my heart rate monitor.
I'm sick to death of being here day and night. People my age are normally going out with boys, going to town and texting each other on their phones. I'm going out with blood tests, going to theatre and colouring in pictures of clowns.
I didn't choose this life. I know that. If I did get to choose my own life I would find a cure to all cancer, live in a palace with my husband, two children (called James and Martha) and our two tabby cats (Charlotte and Isabell) and live happily ever, ever after! But clearly God hates me. Instead I live in a hospital bed (I’ve been living at the hospital since I was five. Yes it’s true, with my parents visiting me each day along with my two brothers. Don't get me wrong I do love them. My life is just great right now. Couldn't be better. Except I know I'm slipping out of the living world. Bit by bit, bit by bit.
Mum
Alex knows something. Mark knows as well. It's all too scary for poor Ollie. He gets paler by the day and thinner by the week. He's only four. He won’t live much longer at this rate. We all know its Amy he's worried about. When Amy was ten and Ollie was two Amy was almost better and was getting out of bed in the morning for around 30 minutes at a time and would sit and read, play or just stay there and watch Ollie. She loved him and she still does. But then she got critically ill again and oh, it's too much for me to think about.
The big brother Alex
I've heard the rowing at night over Amy. But the rowing is very quiet almost silent as if they're mind rowing. Hey may be they are. That would be the most awesome thing ever. Even though I’m thirteen it would still be awesome. Wait I’m going of topic. AMY...
The little brother Ollie
Amy is not better. It makes me sad. I want her to get better so we can play cars and aeroplanes like she promised. She said once she got out of the hospital she would. She promised me. She promised.
The Doctor
Amy's condition has deteriorated dramatically. Her family are sadly none the wiser. They keep saying how hard it would be for them without Amy. I wonder what it's like for Amy to be stuck in a hospital bed while all she wants to do is go outside and play and text on her phone. Normal thirteen year old girls’ things. But unfortunately at this rate she won’t be able to. At this rate she won’t live to February. It's November.
Mum
Dead. She is dead. Gone. She died in her sleep last night. Ollie and Alex have been crying buckets. So have we. We knew she was going to die but not so soon. The worst thing about it was that she died on Christmas Eve. We were coming in to take her home for Christmas like we always did. The whole family was there ready to see her. When we got there the boys were told to wait in the waiting room as we were taken into the office. We thought it was just to discuss how long we were allowed to keep her at home for but sadly it wasn't. It was to tell us that she had died. No one was with her either. No one was with her when she died. That’s what we thought but then we were told another girl who was 14 was sitting with her. Her name is Amelia. She went home today. Back home. Our little girl went up. Rest in peace Amy. Rest in peace up in the heavens. We will always love you. We always will.
The big brother Alex
She is really gone. My little sister is up with God and Jesus. We have never been a religious family even though we are Christians but I will pray every night that someone will defeat cancer. Someone will find a cure. So that everyone, even people who do get or are born with cancer get a fair chance in life. So everyone gets a fair chance. Every single person gets a fair chance in life. This is Alex. Over and out. Amy remember me.
The little brother Ollie
We didn't get to play aeroplanes together or cars. But to make Amam happy up in heaven with our old cat Matilda I will play it every single day so I remember her and she remembers me. I love you Amam very much. Hugs and kisses Ollie xxx I love you
The Doctor
Amy died last night very suddenly. We are happy to say that she did not die with no one at her bedside. This other girl called Amelia was there with her in her dying moments. We were very sorry to admit this to her mother and father and her two brothers but we felt that we also had to tell the boys ourselves. So after we had told their parents we told them to come into the office where we told them from our view.
Amy
I'm gone. I have died. I have changed my mind. I want to go back. I want to see Ollie and play cars and planes with him like I did promise, I want to see Alex and tell him how much I really do love him and return his pair of headphones he gave me. But most of all I want to see Mum and Dad and tell them how I will fight and I will hang on. But I didn't do any of that. Not one single bit of it. I know I should have done but I was only bothered about myself how I felt. I didn't think how it would be for my family. I do visit them. I watch over them like a guardian angel. I see them grieving, I see Alex praying for a cure to al cancer and the thing that breaks my heart is that I see Ollie playing with his cars and running around his room shouting "this is Amam airlines welcome aboard" they all want me back.
Amelia the friend
I met Amy only two days before she died. Even though we did not know each other for long we decided on the day I met her that we would be best friends. We wer
e until last night. She went to bed before me because she had had some more treatment that day but I had a surprise for her. I had been working on it all day and night. While she was asleep I ted it around her wrist. A friendship bracelet. She died with it on. That does make me happy even though I know it shouldn't. Her dying shouldn't make me happy. On the night that Amy died we decided that we would (once we got out of hospital) own a designer flat in London. Near Charring Cross station. We would decorate it with a white fluffy rug, cream carpets, and lovely soft zebra print bed spreads in the double bed room which we would share. One bed each side. But that won’t happen. It can't happen. Unless I make it happen for myself. That’s what Amy would have wanted. When I get out of here I will buy all of those decorations and get a London Charing Cross station Apartment. To make Amy happy while she is floating around the living once more.
Amy
I'm going up and up and up. It's a bit like going up an escalator really. Oh how I miss walking and talking and breathing. I miss Amelia. I've still got the friendship bracelet she made me. She thought that I was asleep. But I was wide awake. Oh damn, I don't have much time left to talk to you. Good bye Amelia, Mum, Dad, Ollie and Alex I will answer your prayers for you. I love you all.
The other side
The Diary of Emma Lewis
Dear diary, that’s a bit preschool isn’t it. It’s like I was about to write ‘dear diary today I played in the sandbox with Mr. Snookyflumpy but I’m not. I’m thirteen now (yes I am very proud) and now technically a teen (also very proud about that) and according to my lovely mother (not) ‘This would be a lovely idea and I’d love to look back on it as I get older.’ So here it goes, welcome to the life of me. Emma Lewis.
16th December
OMG he looked at me! Wait I’m getting ahead of myself let’s rewind… Ok now when Dan started at this stupid school he was really ugly (yes really) but then he got his braces taken off, started wearing contact lenses my mind went boom! And he was suddenly cute! All the girls have a crush on him it’s just normal like…. The world turning. Yeah it’s just normal.
17th December
My life is over as I know it. Mimi (my best friend since year one) is here comforting me. This is what happened…
I was walking to Josh’s school (that’s my younger brother) I was looking awesome (as always) then from somewhere in the shadows something hit my back. I continue walking thinking ‘hey it can only be snow’ (by the way it had snowed that morning) but it was mud. I looked like I had had quite a big accident in the trouser compartment. But the worst part was that Dan was behind me and he saw it. My life is over.
19th December
I’m back and better than eve! Dan and Lydia (the swot of the century) just broke up! Yes, opening! I am sooo going to text him and ask him out. I’ll be back soon
Later that day
I hate Mimi. She’s going out with Dan. Apparently she has had a crush on Dan since she was five (I tried to tell her that Dan didn’t arrive until she was eight but she didn’t listen) I have to go little brother alert.
22nd December
Three days to go three days till Christmas! Uhhhhhh. I’m really depressed. Everyone but me is going out with someone so their all out at the Christmas dance. Underneath the mistletoe ooooh. I hate them. Mimi is trying to make up with me saying Dan isn’t a great dancer or anything but she can’t change a thing. It’s time for revenge…
1st January
A new year, a new plan. Here’s the list of revenge ideas I have so far.
1.pour a bucket of tar over her head to mess up her hair,
2.Turn Dan against her,
3.Turn all her friends against her
Sadly number one is illegal but number two and three aren’t! Yes let’s get revenging. (I’m pretty sure that’s a word isn’t it?)
5th January
Happy birthday to me I’ve got a present oh glee, It’s so great and so evil… So happy birthday to me!
Mimi is going to get the surprise of her life on Monday… Ok let’s rewind. I was talking to Dan over Skype last night (I’m so high tech) and I said “Mimi is like really over protective and like yeah…” Then he ranted on for about two hours and he has broken up with Mimi! Also he is now going out with me!
p.s. It’s not my birthday for another two days but hey who cares?
6th January
I just had the best date ever! We went ice skating! I saw Mimi too, that was awkward since we are not on speaking terms at the moment. I’ve got to go Dan is calling!
Later that day
Dan is a devil. Charlotte (my baby sister) agrees with me so does my Mum Dad and Josh for that matter. I hate him so much that if I showed you I would run out of pages in this book. I’m not being over the top either. If anything I’m being under the top! Tea’s ready I’ve got to go bye.
7th January
Happy birthday to me I’ve got lots of presents oh glee! Happy birthday dear me… Happy birthday to me!
I’m now 14! Oh yeah I’m even more of a teenager now. I’ll tell you what I got later I’ve got an email.
10 minutes later
OMG the email was from Edmund (yeah I know old name) let me describe him…
He’s got deep brown hair, almost black but not quite. He’s a member of the football team and also of the swim club. (It just keeps getting better and better I know!) His brother is eighteen and drives him to school in an old deep green MG. He should be a film star. Ahhhh he’s beautiful. Mimi doesn’t think he’s gorgeous though for one reason and one reason only. He’s the twin brother!
Well that’s another story
That was a preview of the life of me
Emma Lewis.
As we can see two lives of the same aged girls can be dramatically different, keep this story in your mind as you grow to live to your full potential.
Elizabeth C.M lamb
Author