Four o’clock could not come soon enough. Classes had gone stupidly slowly and insanely quickly at the same time. The words her teachers were saying to her went in one ear and came straight out the other side. Nothing sank in. Linear equations were pointless. Improper sentence structures in French were meaningless. When were those things ever going to be an important part of her life here? if there were tests on any of these things, Katie was going to fail. Her mind was on more important matters today – not that certain people believed anything in the world could matter more than schoolwork. Still, her grades had been really good so far so a few bare passes one day wouldn’t drag the average into scholarship-losing territory. Fingers crossed. Katie had hidden notes and papers in every textbook she had used, scribbling things down while pretending to take notes. When the bell had rung out at three and students had swarmed out of the classroom, trying to get out before the crush, Katie spent a few extra minutes packing her things away and then joined the riot. This was where it was all going to start.
She turned against the tide and started making her way to the back of the main building, towards the language labs and the back door. There were slightly less people down here. Only three of the five classes down here finished this early. She glanced down at her arm. Lainy had made her promise to get it X-rayed today and had strapped it up extra tight for the day. Katie had no intention of going to see Dr de Rossa today or at all. The immediate destination was the running track. Half an hour or so of circuits would clear her head. An older girl was hurrying down the corridor and waving at a boy on the corner, hardly looking where she was going. So, she obviously crashed into Katie, sending all her folders spinning to the floor and winding her. Bolts of agony flashed along her arm and the corridor started swaying horribly. Katie blinked and sucked in her breath.
“Watch where you’re going, fresh meat.”
Use it. It made even more sense now that she was trying herself out. Harness that darkness. You know you can. Katie dropped to the floor and started scrabbling for her papers, not bothering to put them in their folders. “You watch it.”
“Excuse me, meat?”
“I just think you should set us newbies a good example by not getting in my way.” She kept her voice low and even but there was no ignoring the razor hardness in it. “Wouldn’t that be nice?”
“You’re making a mistake here. See, I’m in my last year here.”
“Then you should know better.”
The older girl put her kitten-heeled foot on the page of notes Katie was touching and pivoted until her heel tore through. “This is our part of campus. The real students. You kids have all the front rooms. You know, the easy to find rooms.”
Katie smiled to herself and glanced down the corridor. More faces had joined the boy down the hall, eagerly waiting for this to descend into violence. One of them was going to see exactly what she didn’t want. Her brown eyes turned hard and icy. Her brain shut down pain signals and the world snapped into sudden clarity. “Be a good little ghost now.”
“What?”
Katie stood straight, three or four inches taller than this older student and feeling nothing but equal. She pointed to herself and then at her opponent. “Fresh meat… dead meat. How does it feel knowing you should be deep in the ground with maggots eating out your eyeballs and your family always meaning to visit your grave but mysteriously always forgetting? You should really start thinking about that.”
The other girl opened her mouth to speak but a pleasing choking sob squeezed out instead. She looked over her shoulder and grinned at the watching faces, certain that her own was harsh, all angles and lines, an expression twisted by darkness and hate, ready to take on the whole world if it was brave enough. Then she faked a lunge at the girl, her dark eyes, hands curled into fists, body held as poker stiff as Pinocchio terrifying the other girl into turning and running down the corridor, heels clicking nastily on the tiles. The group of students at the corner parted like the Red Sea to let her through. Once out of sight, Katie stared into the empty space and relaxed into these gentle waves of purple-black. It was so easy to let it all wash over her. It made her feel so good and powerful.
And now with her feet drumming a steady beat on the red asphalt, Katie let her mind drift – didn’t need to think about this action, going round and round in endless ovals. The ideas had finally all come together last night as she tried to sleep (dreamlessly). Without a drug to blur the edges of the plan, potential problems were pushing themselves to the forefront and demanding to be considered. Not that all the obstacles in the world were going to stop her from this. All day long, any spare moments were given to this plan – writing each person’s part in it on paper. It was genius, even if she did say so herself. Her phone chimed ten to four. Time to change and get everything ready.
“Right. Good.” She was talking to herself. The first sign of madness. Looking down at her wrist strap and the pages that might wind up doing even more damage – inside and out – Katie had to wonder if that ship hadn’t already sailed.
Jaye and Dina got to the track dead on four, heads bowed together and chattering away. Jaye gave Katie a funny look as she passed, challenging, but went to find a quiet spot to sit. A few minutes later Leo joined them in the top right corner of the seating area.
“We don’t know why we’re here,” Dina told the group. “Leo just told us to be here.”
“I’ve come up with a plan.”
“But-“
“Look, we can still handle this. I mean we’re strong, we’re fearless, we’ve been in worse situations.”
“I suppose we were all brought to Northwood for a reason.”
“I died already. I got brought back.”
“And why? To swim or teach swimming? Did you never think there might be anything else?”
“Honestly... no.”
Katie looked around at her friends, remembering the warning that she couldn’t trust them. They didn’t look untrustworthy – just doubtful. “Dina, I got you out of that horrible End Place before you went over the edge. You said yourself you didn’t mean to go so far. You must trust, then, that however hard this gets I won’t let anything hurt you.”
“I believe you’ll do everything you can.”
“Why do you look like you don’t then?”
“What if everything isn’t good enough?”
“Jaye, I’ve covered for you so many times. The bruises and breakages. I even came looking for you when I thought you’d gone missing looking for D. If i hadn’t got that thing out She would still be controlling your body and hurting whoever took her fancy.”
“I do owe you for that.”
“And you Leo.” I’m trying to save you right now. “You have to help me. I know you won’t thank me for it, but you’ve saved me so many times already. And other people. All your arsehole qualities aside, you’re a good person. You can’t stand by and watch me put myself in danger.”
“Try me.”
“Are you in?”
“Whatever. You gonna tell us this brilliant plan or what?”
“Basically... stand by and watch me put myself in danger.” She put a sheet of much-folded paper on the bench in front of them. “That’s Henry Lawson. Jack’s father. He’s hanging around here somewhere. We need to get him to trust us.”
“Why?” asked Jaye. “He’s nothing to do with us.”
“Oh, I think I skipped a stage. I keep forgetting you haven’t been in my brain all day.” Katie flipped her notebook back a few pages. “He knows Jack loves me. Only Jack’s been AWOL for a couple of days, you know, up there business. So Henry has taken it upon himself to be my protector.”
“Protector? You?”
“Yeah, I know, impossible right?”
“You’re not exactly a do what you’re told girl.”
“You’re more of a do what it takes girl.”
“Anyway. I’m having bad
dreams again. The kind that don’t fade into memories when you wake up. The kind where you might not wake up at all.”
“Oh shit.”
“And when the monsters come for me next time, he’ll come for me.”
“You can’t be sure of that. Dreams that may or may not hurt you aren’t enough for a Shade to risk themselves for. Not if they’re dark.”
A handful of students were huddling from the wind in the seating area but nobody was close enough to hear them. Katie could hear all of the chatter in the stadium if she focused in. Every runner was followed by a stream of burning orange and sweat fell in glistening droplets. She could hear it all, see it all, even smell it if she wished to (she didn’t). Everything was so real and she – Katie, childlike and innocent Katie – wasn’t.
“That won’t be the only danger. I’m going to let myself go dark.”
“What?!” all three of them exclaimed.
“I can’t keep it in any more. My control is slipping.”
Jaye nodded, just the smallest movement. “I saw what happened in the corridor. Anything can set it off.”
“And I don’t want to fight it. Everything’s a choice, a struggle between my head and my heart. I thought I could handle it all but I can’t. I thought I was stronger than this but I’m not. And what the hell’s the point if it’s still going to win in the end?”
“The point is there’s never a point. We just carry on because there’s no other choice,” said Dina. “You told me that.”
“And me.”
“Me too.”
God, Katie had been too positive for her own good. Had these three invested in her empty inspirational words? “But I have a choice now... and I’m choosing that. I want my life to be easy for a little while. I’d like to have fun and freedom. I don’t want fighting and decisions and responsibility.”
She paused for a second, letting those words sink in. They were having the desired effect. Katie could almost feel her face setting into a blank mask; brittle and featureless as slate. This was the first sign that the darkness was stirring inside her, not quite ready to stage a complete take over but restless enough to make it’s presence felt.
“I’ve made up my mind, guys. Once Henry sees me in so deep, he’ll have no choice but to try to save me.”
“But, babe, you don’t have to put yourself through it just to chase the monsters away.”
“Only dark Shades can get into dreams,” Dina pointed out. Thank you. “Jack’s whole bloodline is dark. Isn’t that how it works in families?”
Jaye looked at Leo for support and found none. “I’m not happy about this.”
“I’m not asking you to be happy.” Katie heard her own voice as clear as crystal and as sharp as it too. This was how it felt to let your dark heart control your brain; firing neurons that had never been used before, sending mean signals to her face and making it form words she didn’t mean to say, releasing euphoric hormones until they flooded her thoughts, uninhibited and wild. Allowing her sympathetic ear to be deafened by the desire to crush hopes and cast shadow on fragile optimism. She was selfish and hard-hearted, finally free of all these chains her youth had created. “I’m asking for you to help me. Embrace the darkness and win. Fight and lose. Those were my options.”
Half an hour later, Jaye, Dina and Leo all went away clutching sheets of yellow paper from a legal pad with the plan written on it, and a solemn promise ringing in their ears. The four of them had sworn not to tell anyone else about this plan but to carry on their normal lives.
Which was a laughable concept in itself.
The plan, in short was to get Henry to care enough about Katie to risk his safety in saving her from her nightmares. When he saw how the darkness was weakening her, he would step in to fight the monsters for her. The jobs of her friends were to mention the struggle with the dark energies inside if they saw Henry, bring him to her when the time came to sleep, to stand back and let things happen, to believe that Katie had the slightest idea what she was doing and just be ready to lend a hand if they were needed. It had been easier than expected to get their agreement.
They will betray you...
Of course they would. Katie had sworn them all to secrecy though.
Jaye was the first part of the plan – one of the parts that hadn’t been written down. She had done splendidly. And the best bit? She didn’t even suspect that she had already served her purpose – been used up and tossed aside like a rag doll. Silly Jaye! Anything she did now was predictable, pointless, pathetic. It took a momentary struggle not to sneer after her.
Afternoon was deepening to evening. The weather was chilly and there was damp in the air. Katie zipped her coat up, huddling in the puffy and downy warmth, jammed her baseball cap down over her head and headed for the gates leading to the main road. The temperature had dipped into single figures recently, but after the spoils of a hot summer and early autumn made it feel sub zero. And besides… Katie had an idea that she would still be shivering if it was still the height of summer. It was as if her body was finding the very coldest parts of the evening and holding it close to her, the darkness feeding of the bite. Passing the empty office by the gate was hard. A wave of sadness threatened to make her stumble but she pushed it down. Yes, Roy belonged in that room. Yes, it was wrong for him not to be there. She had to hurry past before mourning took her over. Dina was loitering at the corner of the main academy building and the main road, waving at her to hurry up so they could walk back together. It was time for the second stage.
“Christ, I need help.”
Katie shook her head free of all her dark thoughts and concentrated. I don’t know where you are Jack. I don’t know if you ever want to see me again but… this was turning out to be harder than she had thought. It was hard to keep her thoughts clear and coherent when all she wanted to do was break down and cry, pour her heart out to him and just bury herself in his arms with raw need and despair. Had that been her speaking voice, it would have cracked, choked off with tears, by now. But that wasn’t what was needed right now. The memories of his strong arms around her would have to wait, the images of his face shining with happiness faded into grey. However much she wanted those moments back, they weren’t going to return on the power of wishes. Without you to help me keep a leash on this dark thing… I’ve been fighting it and I’ve lost. I’ve given in. I love you, green eyed cowboy, I thought I could keep strong for you but it’s too powerful. Where-ever you are, Jack, I want you to know that. She toyed with the idea of sending a post script. He had come so far with her, held her hand through so much trauma these last two months, he deserved to know she hadn’t given up without trying. She sent a quick message off, wondering if the right person would hear it.
“Thought you were planning to stay there all night. My life wouldn’t be worth living if you caught hypothermia or something.”
“I probably wouldn’t have a life at all.”
Dina stopped where she stood. Katie moved on beyond her and then turned back to Dina when she noticed she was walking alone.
“Can you not talk like that?”
“True. Exposure kills 30000 people every year. What’s one more?”
“You might be the one more. I don’t want that, none of us do. We don’t want this either.”
“I’ve made my choice, D. Or, rather, it made the choice for me.”
“I get that. Believe me, I understand how hard it is to keep smiling when your emotions are overloading. Telling everyone you’re okay when you’re really really not. It’s unbearably difficult.”
“Why shouldnt I stop then? Why shouldn’t I throw it all away? You did.”
The older girl reeled back, visibly stung. “This plan of yours… how sure are you that it’ll work?” she asked, searching for a question that wouldn’t turn into a personal attack.
“About as sure as I was that we’d get back home when I dragg
ed you off that cliff.” A shudder shook her, either memory or cold.
“Ah.”
“Yeah.” She tightened the straps on her backpack as they walked the long strip of street between two streetlamps. There were a few trees along this stretch – in front of the medical centre – spreading their branches far and wide and providing lots of blind spots under which any old thing could be hiding waiting to pounce waiting to drag her under. Under the ground under the world where it was dark as the night and as silent as the grave. Another shudder rocked Katie. Nothing was likely to happen to them out here.
“You’re changing already.”
“I had an idea of the darkness. I imagined it as these dark laces through this ball of light – my soul or whatever. And every day there were more of them. Then there were more dark bits that there were light and it just… I don’t know, swamped me. Like quicksand.”
Dina nodded like she got the metaphor instantly. “I feel guilty for putting it in you in the first place.”
“You shouldn’t. It was that or die. I’d rather live in shadow than die in the light.”
“I don’t want to watch you do this to yourself.”
“Then close your eyes. You promised to help me and I’m trusting you to do that. I need you three to help me. I don’t have the strength on my own.”
Dina looked longingly further down into the town. This conversation was getting uncomfortable. “Jaye has a swimming gala tonight. I promised to go watch.”
“Fine. Go.”
“Don’t do anything without telling me first.”
“I’m not stupid.” Probably clinically insane, but not stupid.
Night had fallen almost completely by the time the old house on Newton Street came to life. Adam had passed her in the hall when Katie had eventually gotten home, on his way to teach his class at the community centre. Leo was blasting some shooting video game out of the console in the front room and Katie was rummaging through the freezer for something halfway decent to shove in the oven for dinner. There should be a couple of frozen cottage pies they could have. Unsurprisingly, they seemed to have disappeared off the face of the earth. And then Lainy bolted down the stairs and screeched to a halt in the open kitchen door, one door upstairs still banging back onto a wall and swinging shut. For a second, she bent over with her hands pressed to her waist and trying to get her breath back and pointed wordlessly towards the stairs.
“Spider!” Lainy managed to squeak out at long last. “Bathtub… huge.”
“How big?”
Lainy circled her thumb and forefinger to make a shape slightly larger than a two pence piece. “And the legs. Legs like the McDonalds arches.”
“Such a way with words, Lainy. Should have been an English major.”
“I know I’m supposed to be the grown-up but… kill it for me?”
“Arachnophobic?”
“Uh-huh. Stupid right?”
“Give it ten. See if he crawls back down the drain.”
Lainy tiptoed over to take a seat at the table as if she was afraid the spider might hear her moving and chase her down here. “You said you were going to get that seen to.”
“I did. Doc says there’s just some bruising. The strapping took the worstof it.” They were all lies but they came so easily. And the truth? I didn’t bother because I’ve got better things to do than lie under a dumb X-ray machine. And, to be honest, I don’t care. Well, that came even easier.
“Anything else you need to tell me?”
“Should there be?”
“Sweetie, you’re in college, living with a bunch of strangers, working illegally in a nightclub. You’ve got plenty to discuss if you need to do that.”
“I’m fine. Really.”
“We’re always here if you need us though.”
“I’m going to do my homework.” Katie found a frozen meal in the bottom drawer, looked at the cooking time and shoved it in the oven without even noticing what the meal was. “Call me in half an hour to eat that.” Thirty minutes or until the smell of burning hit her room. It wouldn’t be long enough to do all of her homework but she could make a dent. If she worked quickly, there might even be time to fold all those new clothes Marcie had made her buy last shopping trip because they looked so adorable. She had managed to stick to jeans and some printed tops, although a few items had been absolutely gorgeous – tight black trousers with a silver spider web stretching over the right hip.
“Katie! Dinner’s ready!” Lainy shouted up the stairs. The time had just floated away. “You want anything with this?”
“Juice, please!” She didn’t feel like saying her pleases and thank yous but it had been drilled into her since birth to be polite. It was automatic now. Katie shoved her chair away from the desk and capped her pen. Then she looked towards the bed. Falling into it and crawling under the dolphin duvet spoke to her. Sleep had not come easily last night… not until the first gray haze of dawn had lightened the room but it had been dreamless – her straining mind too exhausted to maintain any kind of fantasy or nightmare – but there simply hadn’t been enough of it and she was dog tired now… I want someone to share that bed with me. To hold me tight, so tight that the monsters can’t get me. “Coming!” With a final glance in the mirror to make sure what? That they haven’t already gotten to you? To find her face hovering between the hard, blank expression that was so easy, and the softer face she usually wore. If she could just hold on to that one face…
Lainy was bending over the oven and taking Katie’s ready meal out of thee oven, dropping it onto the sideboard with a hiss and blowing on he fingertips.
“That’s hot.”
“Thanks for the warning.”
“Thought you would have figured out that’s how ovens work by now.” Katie wrapped a tea-towel around her hand and carried the plastic tray of –it smelt like chilli – over to the table and slid her knife under the cellophane. “What happened with the bath?”
“I’m not going back up there. What if it’s still there?”
“What if it’s not?”
It was torture – just sitting around and waiting for her plan to settle into action – but it had to be done. As the night grew later and tiredness dulled Katie’s instincts to panic and worry about everything that could be going wrong, she found she was relaxing. Relaxing in the sensory assault of a first person shooter video game, giggles over a board game and her own MP3 player in her ears trying to drown all the noise out. There was a half-read book on her lap – a yellowing copy of Dracula her English teacher had told them all to read.. it was hard going and the writing was old-fashioned and flowery, but Katie was enjoying it. The organised chaos reminded Katie, suddenly, of evenings with her family when everyone would fight their corner for the TV remote. She couldn’t even remember who usually won. Jaye, home from her gala without a drop of water clinging to her hair, groused about losing to some girl in the year above. Dina tried to be sympathetic but rolled her eyes every so often, indicating she thought Jaye would never let this go. Katie caught her gaze once, in between songs, and had to order herself not to start with the giggles. She really was taking the competition a touch too seriously.
“It’s good to see you smile,” Jaye whispered, leaning in close and taking one earphone out. She held it close to her own ear and then offered it back. “Ugh! Country. More of a dance girl, myself.”
“I like country. It makes everything sound simple.” It sings to me. It is harmonious and powerful. “And a lot of the songs really aren’t that different.”
“Yeah, that’s great, babe,” she said, sounding distracted. “Listen, I saw Henry on my way home.”
Katie felt a hardness come over her face, wondered if anyone had noticed.
“At least, I think it was him. That picture you showed us earlier was him, right? Then, yeah, I saw him.”
“Did you speak to him?”
“No. I wasn’t sure
it was him. He looked… strange.” More specific words had escaped and only synonyms of weird remained.
“Strange how?”
“Like he was calm, completely at ease and nothing to worry about. Yeah, I know, right, what’s strange about that? But then I thought his son’s been missing for two days and if anyone could sense him it should be him. So, shouldn’t he be running around like a headless chicken?”
“He probably thinks Jack can take care of himself.”
“Do you want me to talk to him next time?” Katie grunted a response and tried not to yawn as her friend continued. “I can totally do that.”
£You won’t drop me in it will you? You know…” Katie nodded her head across at Adam and Lainy. Before anyone had a chance to say a word, Dina squeezed onto the other seat of the settee forming a Katie sandwich.
“We all love you, Katie,” she said. “It’s just horrible to watch you do this.”
“Not that we’re trying to change your mind or anything. But this plan of yours… it doesn’t exactly seem water tight.”
“Held together with bubblegum and wishful thinking,” Katie admitted.
The sounds of normal life bubbled all night and it lulled her further towards sleep. A sleep that was broken around midnight when someone prodded her upstairs. A sleep that was so deep and dark that if dreams disturbed it, they were immediately forgotten.
If Monday night was hard, then Tuesday morning was a slow and painful death. But Katie had the utmost confidence in her plan, that her three co-conspirators would do exactly what she wanted.
She hit the gym before classes to work off some of the nervous energy that was bubbling away.
“Thought I might find you here,” she said to the red-haired boy near the weights. “Chris the paramedic.” She had managed to wheedle his work schedule out of Lainy the night before and she had been sure he trained before his morning classes because he worked right after.
“Hey.”
“Pleasantries. How cute.”
“I’m famous for cute,” he replied, almost seriously. “You need a running partner?”
It was a painfully accurate question. One that deserved a painfully accurate answer. “You have no idea.” Katie started up the treadmill nearest the window and set it to a decent jogging pace on a slight incline. Chris matched her pace on the one next to her. “You started racing when?”
“At senior school. My PE teacher said I had a talent.”
“Shit PE teacher.”
“Excuse me?”
“Teachers know nothing. You run, you like it, anyone can tell you’re good. But you don’t have a talent for it. That,” she twisted her head to look him up and down, “isn’t talent. It’s hard work. Stop training, you couldn’t outrun a milk float.”
“Are you feeling okay?”
What was this thing where everyone asked if she was okay? It was getting annoying. The black thing inside uncurled itself and stretched, suddenly interested in the effect it was having even while it slept.
“Never been better.” Katie grinned at him, eyes as hard as marbles. The darkness in her relished the look of shock on Chris’s face. The other day he had seen a sweet and scared girl, trembling outside a hospital. Today, he was running beside a girl who seemed closed off to the entire world and who didn’t give a damn. “Hmm, maybe I have been. It’s hard to tell sometimes.”
“I know the feeling,” he said, sounding like he genuinely understood. Katie frowned. This wasn’t how the plan was supposed to go…
“Doubtful.”
“Come on, I know you can race harder.” Chris reached down and cranked his speed up. Predictably shaded eyes, hidden behind wraparound dark glasses, dared Katie to match him. Maybe even go faster.
She grinned – lips pulling up in a not-quite-smile. I like a challenge. “How’m I doing? Keeping up?”
“Not bad, kid, not bad at all. How often do you come up here? Thought pounding the ground was more your style.”
“Not today.” Katie jumped and straddled the moving black belt, one foot on either side and fumbling with the sports cap on her water bottle. “Too many people. All breathing and smiling and moving. Damn things get everywhere.”
“Problem with people?”
“Hmm.” The black thing inside was growing all the time. It wanted to hurt people… hurt them until they cried blood and bled tears… hurt them until they begged for mercy… hurt them until they didn’t care if they got it or not. But Katie had it under control. Only a tiny bit of it came out each time. Just enough to be used for what she needed. The rest of the purple-black parasite complained at being left alone. It could carry on complaining. Katie was tired of listening.
“Big talker.”
“I was always told that if I can’t say anything nice, I shouldn’t say anything. But I can say lots of nice things. I just don’t want to.”
“You don’t want to be nice?”
“Too much work.”
“Well, of course it takes work. People can’t just go round being mean to each other for no reason.”
“I have a reason.” Katie fixed her gaze on the display before her, noting how far she had run so far. Then she snaked one hand out and covered one of his with it, slowing him down a little. His eyes widened behind their shades, his cheeks stretched and smoothed. A tendril of darkness slithered down her arm and pushed at the skin of her palm, gently brushing him. Chris glanced up at her. This was Levenson Academy. Things like this weren’t supposed to happen in this place. Things like this weren’t supposed to happen full stop.
“You…”
“Me.”
“How…”
“It’s been a long time, Chris. Growing, getting stronger. Making itself ready for the outside world.” She hit the red STOP button with her elbow and hopped down, craning up to stare straight into his face. It was had to make his expression out but Katie didn’t think he looked scared. Her eyes took on an instant glitter – a dark sparkle. Her mind ran to another place, somewhere she had to be and soon, picked up a familiar shape hovering near the door. “D’you think it’s ready now? I do.” Now he looked scared. Every fibre of her screamed against this alarming new development. What? You have so many friends now that you can afford to scare one away? But she shut the voice up with a mental slap. Secretly, Katie enjoyed that. “Girlfriend’s waiting.”
“I should go.” Chris stepped from his machine and wiped the back of his neck with a towel from a bag with LASA and the college crest sewn into it. “Early art class. We should do this again. You make a good partner.”
Katie grinned one final time. Her cheeks were starting to ache but when her face wanted to smile, it smiled. Everything was going so perfectly. “Say hi to Jaye for me. We’re such good friends.” And then Chris was disappearing through the door like he couldn’t get away fast enough. He was haring off to tell some tales.
Marvellous.
The first bell was about to ring out but Katie was swinging her way out of the building against the crush of people flooding into their classes. Look at them all. Like sheep or deer… just going the same way as everyone else. I could feel sorry for them. Not knowing what it would be like to go the other way. Only almost though. If they went the other way… if they went the way she was going, the town would turn into chaos. For people would find her and they would stop her. It couldn’t be that way. And it wouldn’t be that way. Her friends were busy doing what she had told them to do – and probably a little bit more besides, thinking they were being helpful. And while they were all busy stressing over that Katie could be working on the real plan.
The real plan that accounted for her friends’ betrayal. Mademoiselle Romani had told her not to trust them, that they would turn on her and tell their stories they thought might help, and they had. The real plan that considered her emerging dark nature and the intensity of her light. The light might be almos
t swallowed whole by now but it hadn’t faded. The real plan which included letting go of everything she was trying to hide away and allowing it to become her fuel. But, mostly, the real plan was the one in which she trusted nobody but herself.
“Excuse me, little lady,” Henry said, stepping from the shadows near the student coffee shop and touching her by the shoulders. “Something wrong?”
The question was too sharp. Too pointed. Everything was wrong. The list could go on and on if she opened her mouth and, fearing this, Kate lether shoulders drop and kept looking at the floor.
“Coffee. We’ll talk.”
She let him take her by the elbow – an old-fashioned gesture of politeness that surprised her – and lead her into the coffee shop. It was quite a big place, about half-full, not just with students although the academy owned the place. “Hot chocolate,” she told him and went to find an empty seat while he went to order. Some-one had already spoken to Henry Lawson – probably that morning. “I ditched school to find you.”
He slid into the seat opposite and sipped his lidded drink, not even wincing as the steaming liquid hit his lips. He’s not human. He doesn’t feel the heat. “Why?”
Shining brown eyes reflected in the sticky table top. Henry was watching her closely.
“Your friend came to me earlier. Leo. I think his name was Leo.”
“I’m surprised,” in the way that wasn’t.
“He told me to expect you.”
“I bet he said a damn sight more than that.”
“You’re shivering.”
Katie held her hand out in front of her. Slight tremors shook it like a leaf on the breeze. A mad giggle rose up in her throat. “Oh yeah.” The hot chocolate in front of her was milky and sweet but she still found herself dumping more sugar into it. As chilled and bitter as she way feeling, nothing seemed sweet enough. “let me guess. He told you about my nightmares.”
Henry stroked her hand like the police counsellors used to. It was not a nice feeling. Katie forced a smile anyway, pretending that his touch had comforted her.
“Jack used to chase them off. But, they’ve caught me up now.” You stopped running. “They’re lying still for now but soon…” She sighed and looked up, mouth twisted in a grin that held no joy. “Soon they will move, and I will move with them.”
“Why? What do they want?”
“Ever since I got here I’ve been kind of cursed with bad dreams. Dreams that don’t always stay in my head. If you know what I mean.”
Something familiar flashed across the man’s face. Yes, he understood. He understood exactly. “You’re thinking that your nightmares might be real and if you let them catch you-“
“There’ll be no more me,” she finished. “It could be because they want me out of their way. Maybe they just think I’m good sport. Whatever the reason, I’m prey. And I don’t have a reason to keep running.”
“And my son kept you free from these things?”
“He promised to take care of me. And then he left me.”
“You need help to fight these things then.”
“More than anything. I’m on my own now. I’m just human. I don’t have the strength or knowledge you guys do.” She whined and flexed her fingers beyond the wrist strap. They had gone numb and the pins and needles now were reminding Katie not just of sensation returning to her hands but of reality returning to her whole body. It hurt. It ached. But it would be worth it.
“I don’t know if you should. It might be dangerous.”
“Little lady, I’m a cowboy. I know all about dangerous.”
“But-“ She took another slurp of her drink, suddenly glad she hadn’t gone for coffee. These jitters didn’t need to be any worse. He had definitely seen them, seen tall probably. Words, now, were the only things left to finish. “If you’re sure? And I wouldn’t ask if Jack was around.”
Henry leaned forward and his green eyes burned eagerly. Katie was weak, a vulnerable mortal girl. “Anything you need me to do.”
“Wait for me sleep. When the bad people come for me, you come too.”
Chapter eleven