It wouldn’t be long before I knew how he had met Marley.
After those first couple weeks, Steven and I were spending more time than necessary together. I have always looked down on those Hollywood couples that do a film or two together and end up hooking up. But now I know why they do it. When you are spending such a large portion of your time with someone, it's hard to not get to know them intimately and possibly begin to have feelings for them beyond friendship.
Steven and I had so much in common, and he was so much fun to be around. We were both jokesters and loved pulling pranks on people. And the screenwriter was such a romantic, there were very few scenes that didn't have both Max and Mira in them, so we spent a lot of time together on-screen, as well as off. Not to mention the make-out scenes and the affection we had to fake for each other in front of the camera. It wasn’t long before that fake affection began to take on an all-too-real hue.
Eventually, Steven invited me back to his apartment after filming one night. He left me in the living room and headed to the kitchen to make a pot of coffee. I sat on the couch and looked around. It was a pretty normal apartment: large, flat-screen television, leather furniture that was pretty, but not super comfortable. He had a bookshelf against one wall that was bursting with books from all walks of life. I got up to examine them. Many were books that I recognized, but he also had a number of books I'd never heard of, most in languages I couldn’t read or even recognize.
As I returned to the couch, I noticed the curtains were extremely thick black-out curtains and not a sliver of light was coming through them from the street. The first thought that popped into my head was, “What if he really is a vampire?” I immediately realized how absolutely foolish that was and nearly laughed out loud, but he walked in just then carrying two fresh cups of coffee and I caught myself. He saw the smile that had come to my lips and gave me a questioning look. I shook my head and smiled some more, refusing to let him know that I had thought he was a real vampire, even for just a brief moment. He already thought I was odd. No reason to let him think I was odder.
We sat and chatted for awhile about random things. We never seemed to have trouble finding things to say and I do not remember us every having an awkward moment of silence. Oh, we’ve had moments of silence, but they were comfortable silences, never awkward with one of us trying to find something to say. We were both comfortable in the knowledge that if we had something important to say, we would say it, and there was no point in forcing conversation where it did not exist. I hate when people do that. Silence isn’t always a bad thing. Sometimes it is okay to say nothing or do nothing for a bit. It gives a person time to relax and reflect. Reflection can be good. Mental reflection, that is. Reflections in a mirror sometimes suck, especially after a long night of hunting (yes, I can still see myself in a mirror. I’m not a ghost, just dead).
Eventually Steven put down his coffee cup and turned to face me. He took my hands in his and looked into my eyes.
“Look, I think it's time we talk about this. Ever since that first night, you have been all I think about. I can’t get you out of my head. I want to be with you. I don't mean sex, necessarily. I just want to be with you. I want to be able to hold your hand for real, off the set, and kiss your cheek, and put my arm around you when it's chilly. I want to be able to say yes when people ask if we are dating. You know, they ask that a lot. People assume we are already together.”
I blushed a bit and looked down at my hands. I liked him, a lot, but I wasn't expecting him to be this forthright. Guys rarely are. It was refreshing and scary at the same time.
“I know they do. And I agree with you. I want to be able to say yes, too.”
With that, Steven leaned over and kissed me softly. Then we both smiled and picked up the previous conversation where we had left it, this time holding hands and moving closer on the couch.
I left his apartment at about noon. I didn't realize what time it was before I stepped out the door. The curtains had stayed shut the entire time I was there, so the living room was always a muted soft glow from the floor lamps in the corners. When I stepped onto the street, I was hit by a brightness that hurt my eyes so bad I had to close them and cover them with my hands. I fumbled in my bag for my sunglasses and hailed a cab.
I crawled in bed and stayed there for the next five hours, at which time I rolled out of bed, quite literally, landing on the floor in a pile and bumping my knee on the night stand. I was exhausted, but I had to be on the set no later than 7:30, so I went about the business of showering and prettying myself as much as possible. By that, I mean I put on a bit of eyeliner and some lipstick, then said to heck with it and did not bother with the rest. I’m not very good at doing that whole girl thing. I like my morning routine, well, waking routine, to take less than fifteen minutes all told.
Once I was ready, I grabbed my bag and coat and headed to the coffee shop for a latte before walking to the set. It wasn’t too far, and I made it with plenty of time to spare, just as the sun was setting in the sky. About ten minutes later, Steven came in and kissed me on the cheek. I greeted him with a little hug and we went about the business of getting ready for work.
For the next month, that's the way things went. I went back to his place for awhile, then headed home to get cleaned up, then we met at work again. Things were going great and we were having so much fun together, but there was always this weird feeling in the back of my mind. It wasn’t a bad feeling. I didn't think Steven was a bad guy. I just knew, somehow, that he wasn’t telling me everything. He wasn’t blatantly lying to me, but he wasn’t being completely honest. But we all have things in our past that we don't want to dredge up to just anyone, so I wasn’t going to pry into it until I could get a better sense of what 'it' was. I didn't have to figure it out on my own, though. Steven wanted to tell me, and he eventually did.
We had precious few days off, and Steven wanted to make one of these days special. Well, it was a night, actually, since we were so used to sleeping during the day. He made reservations for eight o’clock at a really nice restaurant and I met him at his apartment at about seven. We chatted for a bit and then went to dinner. It was a beautiful meal and it tasted delicious. We went dancing afterward and ended up back at his place. He was changing out of his suit and I went to hang out in the living room, as usual. I noticed the curtains again and realized they’d never once been open when I’d been here, except for a few times at night when we would look out over the lit city. He would always close them when we stepped away. I felt my brow furrow and thought it over for a moment, then dismissed it. Steven came into the living room and sat beside me on the couch. Like he had the night he asked me out, he turned to me and took my hands.
“Jane, there is something I need to talk to you about. Well, two things really.”
I immediately tensed. The look on his face showed something I wasn’t expecting: fear. What was he afraid of? Was this going to be so bad he was afraid I would reject him? What on earth could be that awful? Did he kill someone? Does he have a child he’s been keeping from me? Was he breaking up with me? A million thoughts ran through my mind so fast I couldn’t comprehend most of them.
He took a deep breath and continued, “Jane, the first thing I want to talk about is us. I love you, more than I ever thought possible. I want us to be together forever. I want you to be my wife.”
My heart soared with excitement and I blurted out, “Oh yes. Yes, I want to be your wife, too. Oh Steven!” And I threw my arms around him.
He pushed me away, though, and said in a low, stern, unhappy voice, “Wait. Before you can say that, there is something you need to know about me. It is going to be very hard for you to believe, and you might not accept it at all. I rarely share this with anyone. It could very well ruin my career, and my life.”
I sat there in silence, worried, terrified actually, waiting for him to continue. I felt certain that what he was about to share with me would crush my world. A moment ago, my future was set and I was going t
o grow old with the man I loved. And now, I was convinced he would rip it all away. He had said he loved me only to soften the blow that was about to come.
Steven took a deep breath and lowered his eyes. He didn't say anything for awhile, and seemed to be composing his thoughts. Then he looked up and brushed my cheek.
“Have you ever wondered why I don't open the curtains during the day? Or why we never seem to leave the apartment before nightfall?”
Of course I had. I had just written it off as a weird quirk, though. I didn't say as much. I just sat there looking at him, waiting for him to continue.
“Of course you have. You aren’t stupid like some of the girls I have dated. But you accepted it as part of who I am, and it's good that you did. You see, I can’t leave during the day. I can’t be outside. I’m very sensitive to the sunlight. It hurts me to no end. You see…”
At this he paused and looked down. I knew what was coming, but I don't think I was really ready for it. How could anyone believe something so outrageous, something we were taught was a myth since childhood? It was preposterous, really. Unthinkable. Unimaginable. Impossible. And totally true.
“You won’t believe me unless I show you.