I smiled at him. I had no idea where he got peonies, considering they were out of season in this state, but every week, without fail, peonies turned up at the station.
“You know I love them.” And I did. “Where are you getting them?”
He grinned. “I’ll never tell.”
I rolled my eyes. “Infuriating man.”
Henry tugged on my hand. “You love it.”
Any attempt to remain expressionless were obliterated under his deliberately heated stare. No matter how many times I tried to not react, I failed. I laughed and shook my head at him.
Our meal arrived and I attempted to let go of the uneasy butterflies in my stomach so I could enjoy it. This was my treat. Every week, a burger at the Bristol Lounge.
I was digging in and made the mistake of looking up from my burger as I chewed.
Henry was staring, a small smile curling his lips.
Swallowing, I put my burger down and wiped my mouth with a napkin. “What?”
“Nothing.” He dug into his filet.
“It was something.” I huffed. “You don’t stare at a woman when she’s eating a burger, Lexington. It’s rude.”
He chuckled. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
“Come on. Seriously. What were you staring at?”
Henry leaned toward me and said quietly, “I like watching you. Whether you’re eating a burger or coming around my cock, I like watching you.”
Did I mention he had a tendency to say filthy things to me in public? I threw my napkin at him and he laughed, ducking to avoid it.
“Well, you wanted to know.”
The truth was I loved our banter. I loved how playful he was and I was never bored when we were together. In fact, I looked forward to seeing him like an addict looked forward to their next fix. It was dangerous, I knew it, but I couldn’t stop myself. And I really believed Henry felt the same way. No one could look at someone with the deep intensity he looked at me with and not feel the same way, right? My past lovers had told me that they cared but now I knew, after feeling the sincerity in Henry’s words, those prior words were merely letters put together on the tongue.
“Henry.”
The voice abruptly yanked me from my sweet musings.
It was a voice I did not want to hear.
“Mother.” Henry pushed back his chair and stood. I finally drew my gaze upward to watch him round the table to kiss his mother’s cheek. She stood before us looking ill at ease. Behind her was another well-put-together woman around her age and a young, beautiful brunette, likely in her early twenties.
To say things had been strained between Henry and his mother was to put it mildly. It had gotten to the point where he’d stopped visiting his parents’ home, and I could only surmise it was due to her opinion of me. I truly didn’t know what I’d done to upset this woman so much, but it was clear she detested me, and even more so now that her hatred had damaged her relationship with her son.
It was horrible to be the cause of their discord, and I’d tried talking to Henry about it but he didn’t want to discuss it.
“How are you?” he asked.
Her expression said, “You’d know if you called more” but she kept those words to herself. “Well, thank you. You remember Edina Hamilton?”
Henry nodded and held out his hand to the older woman. “Nice to see you again.”
“You too, Henry.” Her eyes ran over him appraisingly and there was something in them that made me stiffen. I realized what that something was when she practically yanked the young brunette into Henry’s personal space. “You remember my lovely daughter June. She graduated from Yale this summer.”
His smile was lazy and flirtatious as he shook June’s hand. “Congratulations.”
“Thank you.” She beamed up at him. “I still can’t believe I graduated.”
“June was pre-law,” her mother preened. “She’ll be attending Harvard Law in the fall.”
“Impressive. Smart and beautiful.” Henry winked.
I hated him.
His mother shot me a smug look while he wasn’t paying attention and I squirmed in my seat.
Yes… the last few months with Henry had been blissful. With one exception.
His inability to not flirt.
I’d tried to not let it bother me.
But it bothered the heck out of me.
“Well, our table is waiting,” Mrs. Lexington said. “Before we go, Henry, I was thinking you could introduce June to Caine as she hopes to go into corporate law. It’s best to make all the connections she can now, am I right?”
“Definitely,” Henry said affably.
“Oh, wait.” June dug into her purse and produced a card. “My number.”
He took it. “Have a lovely lunch, ladies.”
As they walked away, Henry returned to the table and I wondered how much of a scene I’d make if I stuck my fork in his hand. I tried to tell myself that his flirting didn’t mean anything, but I guess I wasn’t thick-skinned enough to be able to put it to one side.
I didn’t want him telling other women they were smart and beautiful.
I didn’t see other men anymore. I only saw him. And it hurt to think my feelings were more involved than his.
My appetite gone, I shoved the burger around my plate.
“Are you okay?” He frowned at me after a few minutes.
I nodded, afraid to speak in case I screamed at him.
He sighed. “I know it was rude of me not to introduce you but I was going to before my mother said they had to get to their table.”
My answering smile was tight.
“Is it because of my mother? Because I told you not to worry about that.”
In that moment, I wanted to claim a headache and leave him there but that would mean doing so in front of his mother, and I didn’t want her to think she’d won. Instead I said, “No, it’s not that. I just have a bit of a headache.”
“We can leave.”
“No. Finish lunch.”
Afterward we strolled out of the restaurant with Henry’s hand on my back, and he nodded at his mother and her companions as we left.
“Why don’t I drop you off at my apartment? You can get some sleep, get rid of that headache, and I’ll take care of you when I get back from the office.” He kissed my hand as we sat in his car outside the hotel restaurant.
His words were sweet but I was still pissed way the hell off. I shrugged my hand out of his. “You know I really just want my own bed.”
Henry searched my face and I did my best to keep my expression neutral. With a heavy sigh, he drove out of the hotel driveway and joined the traffic, heading toward Lower Roxbury.
Outside my apartment I gave him a quick peck on the cheek and jumped out of his car before he could question why I was acting so strangely.
Once inside I leaned against my door, trying to catch my breath. It felt like I’d sprinted home. I was jealous and hurt over Henry’s flirting but did I have any right to be? Surely he didn’t mean anything by it. But me? I was keeping the truth from him.
I was all wrong for this man.
He needed a woman who accepted him for who he was.
He needed a woman who could be totally open with him.
Ten minutes later, my phone beeped. It was a text from Henry.
Are we okay?
I wanted to tell him no. We weren’t. And we probably weren’t going to be.
Then I thought how wonderful it felt when we lay in each other’s arms at night and talked until we fell asleep.
So I replied:
Of course. I’m just tired. We’ll talk soon. xx
* * *
One of the best things about dating Henry was the fact that he’d introduced me to Alexa. It would be an understatement to say that she and Caine had been through the ringer over the summer. If I told you what had happened to her, to them, you’d think I was making the whole thing up.
Alexa—or Lexie, as I called her—was fully recovered fr
om the disaster, thank God. Even better, she and Caine were a real couple now. It turned out Caine was head over heels in love with her. I didn’t think it was possible for Carraway to love anyone more than business, but after witnessing him with Lexie these last few months, I knew it to be true. He stared at my friend like there was no one else in the world like her.
And he never flirted with other women.
Ever.
He didn’t even look at other women!
Suffice it to say, I was envious.
Things had been strained between Henry and me since our lunch. I’d put off seeing him before the weekend, and I had my quiet Saturday at home while he was at the game. I couldn’t shake him on Sunday without causing drama, and honestly, as much as he’d pissed me off, I missed him.
And that’s why I found myself having dinner with Henry, Caine, and Lexie at Caine’s penthouse. It wasn’t the first time I’d been in the amazing space but it was my first dinner there. The penthouse was on Arlington Street, a two-minute walk from Henry’s apartment. There were floor-to-ceiling windows everywhere, giving him awesome views of the city. The apartment was open-plan living and on a raised platform was a stylish eight-seat dining set so we could enjoy that view while we ate.
Conversation was going well—we were bantering back and forth—when Henry ruined it.
“I bumped into Edina Hamilton and her daughter June the other day,” he said to Caine. “June is starting Harvard Law in the fall. She’s going into corporate law and I promised I’d introduce you.”
“Why?” Caine frowned.
Yes, why, Henry?
“She wants to start making the right connections now. You know how these things work.”
“And does she seem like the kind of thick-skinned, hard-nosed lawyer I’d have at my firm?”
Lexie snorted and shot me a smirk.
I didn’t pay much attention to her amusement. I wanted to hear Henry’s reply.
He shrugged. “It was a two-second meeting. She graduated from Yale and got into Harvard Law. Clearly she’s smart.”
“And beautiful.” The words were out of my mouth before I even knew what was happening.
Everyone looked at me because I’d not only said the words, they were so filled with resentment, even I flinched.
“What?” Henry said.
Well, it was out there now. “That’s what you said to her. You told her she was smart and beautiful and then you winked at her.” Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Lexie and Caine shift uncomfortably. Shit. “Never mind.”
“Oh no.” Henry sat back, dropping his fork. He crossed his arms and grinned at me as if he was actually enjoying my bout of jealousy. “Please, go on.”
Hurt scored across my chest like whiplash. He thought this was funny? He thought this was a moment for our playful banter where we pretended to be irritated with each other? My expression smoothed to politeness. I didn’t want to cause a scene in front of our friends.
I turned to Lexie who was staring at me in concern. “Did you say Mrs. Flanagan gave you the recipe for this?” I indicated to the paella. Mrs. Flanagan was Caine’s neighbor and a good friend to both him and Lexie. She was all I could think of in the moment to talk about.
“Yes,” Lexie answered slowly. “Would you like it?”
“That would be great.”
I could feel Henry staring at me but I refused to look at him. Instead I gave Lexie a somewhat tremulous smile. “Have you managed to talk that banoffee pie recipe out of her yet?”
“No,” Lexie said, thankfully going along with me. “I beg and I beg. If Caine asked, she’d probably give it to him but he won’t.” She threw him a teasing look. “He does it to torture me.”
“No. I keep telling you Effie guards her pie recipes with her life. You’ll get them in her will. You just have to be at peace with that.”
When Caine was relaxed, making jokes, I could definitely see why Lexie fell for him. The man had a quick, dry sense of humor, and he stared at my friend like she was a miracle.
I understood that too.
I had a woman crush on Lexie. She was funny, smart, determined, loyal, and truly kind. She was everything I hoped I could eventually become.
A little while later, I excused myself to the bathroom, mostly to get away from the tension Henry and I were causing at the table. The lower-level bathroom was getting a facelift so I climbed the spiral staircase that led upstairs. I was walking down the hall when I heard my name murmured below. Like a big kid, I tiptoed back down the hall to eavesdrop.
“It was nothing,” I heard Henry say.
“It’s not nothing, Henry. You called a woman smart and beautiful in front of Nadia. And winked at her,” Lexie huffed.
“So?”
“Are you kidding me? I thought when you started dating Nadia that you’d stop flirting with other women.”
“I don’t flirt.”
“You flirt all the time.”
“If I do, it doesn’t mean anything. Nadia knows that.”
“No.” Lexie sounded despairing. “God, Henry, do you not know anything about women?”
“Carraway, help me out here.”
“Sorry,” Caine’s voice rumbled up to me, “I can’t. If Lexie flirted with other men, it would piss me off.”
See! Thank you, Caine!
There was silence and I was about to head back to the bathroom when Lexie said, “It wouldn’t bother you if Nadia flirted with other men?”
More silence, and I found myself leaning further toward the staircase, desperate to hear his answer.
To my disappointment, he didn’t respond. With an inward sigh, I found the bathroom, washed up quickly, and wandered as casually as possible downstairs.
Henry stood from the table. “There you are. Time to go.”
Taken aback, I could only nod and quickly thank Lexie and Caine for having us before Henry grabbed my hand and led me out. Just as we walked into the hall, I looked over my shoulder and caught Lexie grinning mischievously at me.
Confusion wrinkled my brow.
Inside the elevator, his grip on my hand tightened. I dared to look at him. He was staring straight ahead, the muscle in his jaw twitching.
“Months ago when I crashed your date with that photographer, I was jealous as hell,” he bit out. “And I made that clear.”
My heart started to race. “Yes?”
Finally, he looked at me, his expression unsure. “You’ve been pissed all week because of June Hamilton and you didn’t tell me. How many times have I pissed you off and you haven’t told me?”
“Not pissed,” I said, my words so low I was almost whispering. “Hurt.”
Remorse and something else flicked across his gaze. “That’s a million times worse. Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Because you’re a flirt.” I wrenched my hand away. “That’s who you are. I can’t change who you are, Henry. And I can’t change the fact that I’m the kind of woman who wants the guy she’s with to pretend that he doesn’t see how beautiful other women are. I don’t see other men when I’m with you. They don’t exist. Not like that. All I ever see is you. And yes… it hurts that you don’t feel the same way.”
He cut me a disbelieving look.
Yet he didn’t speak.
He didn’t speak at all. However, when the elevator doors opened, he grabbed my hand and marched me down the street to his apartment. I didn’t know what was going to happen next. Uneasiness made me tighten my hold on his hand and he squeezed back. In reassurance?
I didn’t know.
The doubt was obliterated as soon as I stepped inside his apartment.
He slammed the door shut behind us and pinned me against the wall, towering over me, covering me, staring down into my eyes with a fierceness that made me breathless.
“What I say to other women… it’s merely years of cultivated charm. A veneer. A mask. And I’ve been doing it so long, it naturally happens.” He cupped my face in his hand and leaned down so our
noses were touching. There was nowhere for me to look but deep into those vivid blue eyes. “But I can promise you that you are all I truly see. You’re all I think about. All the time. And I’ve been trying my damnedest to give you space when you get distant with me like you did this week… but I’m not winning either way here so I might as well just say what’s been building inside me for months.” His thumb slid over my lips as he drank in my every feature. “Nadia, I am so in love with you. Every moment we’re not together, I miss you. I miss you like I haven’t seen you in years. The thought that I’ve been hurting you these past few months kills me. I’ll be more aware of the flirting thing. I won’t do it. I promise you. But you have to promise me that from now on, you’re going to talk to me. You’re going to tell me when I’ve made you happy and when I’ve pissed you off… and if, and I hope I don’t, hurt you.”
Nadia, I am so in love with you.
Never before had I felt such a mix of agony and euphoria. His words meant everything to me… yet they also terrified me.
The fear won and it closed my throat and any response I might have had.
That was when Henry Lexington proved to me he was someone very special.
He brushed his lips gently over mine and whispered, “I can wait, Sunshine. You take all the time you need.”
“I can’t believe you talked me into this.” Anxiety surged through me.
“We have to face her together. It might as well be now.”
Face Henry’s mother. Together. At a Sunday luncheon. A garden gala. Whatever that was. “Why is there always an event every weekend in your circle?”
He shrugged. “Charities, political campaigns, celebra—”
“People with too much time on their hands.”
He chuckled. “Please don’t say that in front of my mother.”
“She doesn’t like me, Henry. Nothing I say or do will change that.”
“Well, she needs to come around because you’re not going anywhere. And that’s why you’re here. So she can see that.”
I nodded, leaning into him a little more. “I know. I’m sorry. I’m just nervous.”
“Lexie is here somewhere,” he offered, knowing her presence would soothe me.