After a while Lily got up and padded down the stairs. She took the phone out of its cradle and went out on the porch. It was an early spring evening but not too cold. She sat on the wicker love seat and called her grandmother in Decentville.
“It’s me,” said Lily when her grandmother answered.
“Hello, beauty,” said her grandmother. “It’s eleven. That’s when I watch my surfing videos.”
“Grandma,” said Lily, “there’s something awful that’s going to happen.”
“What is it, darling?” said her grandma. “I’m going to go into the living room and sit down.” Lily could hear a door slam on the other end of the phone. With a puff her grandmother plopped down on the sofa. “It’s an invasion of some kind, isn’t it?”
“Whales,” said Lily.
“Oh, honey,” said her grandmother. “At least the waiting is over.”
Lily told her about what had happened so far. (If you’re interested, you can go back to the beginning of the book and read all the way through to this point again.)
When Lily was done with her story, she said, “What am I going to do?”
“Why don’t you fight them with your magic sword?”
“I don’t have a magic sword.”
“In the world of make-pretend, you can have anything you want, darling.”
Lily felt tears gather in her throat. “Grandma, this isn’t pretend.”
Her grandmother didn’t argue. “I wish games could go on forever,” she said soothingly. “I remember, Lily...” She laughed.
Lily loved the sound of her grandmother’s chuckle. She held the phone closer to her ear.
Her grandmother said, “The games we played when I was little lasted for days. We would be running around in the fields down by Tinker’s Point like crazy people. We would hide in the grass. We jumped off the rocks, and I’m afraid we bumped up our knees sometimes.”
Lily smiled.
“I remember the fireflies always being out,” said her grandmother, “but probably that was only once or twice.” Sadly, she added, “You know how, when you’re remembering, you put beautiful things everywhere? You spread them out, and they fill the whole memory. Even if there weren’t fireflies every night we played there, those were firefly times, Lily.”
Lily just sat on the wicker and listened to her grandmother. She had curled up so that her knees were under her chin. Even just the sound of her grandmother’s voice made her feel quiet and safe.
“Everyone wants to get back to the place they know best,” said Lily’s grandmother. “When you are old, though, sometimes that place is not just far away on the map but far away in time. How do you get to home, then, when home is in another era?”
Lily said, “I don’t know, Grandma.”
But something was clicking in Lily’s brain. Everyone wants to get back to the place they know best.
“Grandma ...,” she said. “Grandma, I think you might have given me an idea.”
“That’s sweet, darling,” said her grandmother. “I was a little worried that you had fallen asleep or were calling from the john. Your cousin Sid does that, you know. He goes to the bathroom with the phone. I’m his granny; I can tell. Sometimes he grunts while he’s talking.”
“You’ve really helped me, Grandma.”
“Can I say the other thing about Sid? He can’t figure out how my front door works. Whenever he visits he goes around to the side, so he won’t have to admit it.”
They talked for a little while about Sid-talking like two girls about a boy—and Lily, curled in the wicker love seat, smiled for the first time in a while.
Finally she had a plan.
The next day—the day before the whales invaded North America—Lily, Jasper, and Katie had a powwow over breakfast at the Aero-Bistro.
“It’s deuced difficult to do anything,” said Jasper, “when we can’t convince any adults to help us.”
Katie groaned, “No one will believe us.”
Lily looked around carefully at the other diners and the android waiters. She whispered, “I think ... Okay... I think I have a plan. Something we can try, anyway.”
“Top-notch, Lily!” said Jasper. “But there’s no need to whisper.”
“Well—” started Lily.
“No need to whisper,” declared Jasper, “because I just invented these.” He lifted up three metal masks with no eyeholes and what looked like bicycle horns coming out of where the mouth and ears would be. “They’re Secret Planning masks. You slip them over your head,” he said, demonstrating, “and then when you talk about a secret plan, only other wearers of a mask can hear.”
Katie lifted one off the table and looked at it uncomfortably. “Wow, Jasper,” she said. “These sure do have... a lot of rivets.”
“Just a little something I cooked up,” said Jasper proudly.
“Wouldn’t it be easier for Lily just to keep her voice down?” Katie suggested.
“Come along! Give it a try!” said Jasper.
They all put on the masks. Their faces now were gray, with bicycle horns coming out of their mouths and ears.
“Hokay,” said Katie. “Let’s roll.”
“Now, Lily, you just tell us the plan like you would normally,” said Jasper. “We’ll be able to hear perfectly, but no one else will be able to.”
“I just...talk?”
“Right-o.”
“And the masks will just block out what we say when we’re planning?”
“Check.”
“Okay.” Lily took a deep breath. “What I’m thinking is [
].”
“Hmm, yes,” said Jasper. “Devilishly clever.”
“[
]”
“And you really think that’s the best way to get them to [ ]?” asked Katie.
“[ ],” said Lily “[
].” She used her hands to illustrate. “So then when [
]”
“And meanwhile,” said Jasper, getting excited, “I could [
], and when they falter, I’ll be there to [
].”
Katie asked, “Is anyone else finding that their breath is like pooling right under your chin? In this gross wet pool?”
“It’s a fine plan, Lily,” said Jasper.
“Does that mean we can take these off?” asked Katie.
Lily nodded her big clunky metal head.
“Good-o, then,” said Jasper. “I’ll order the Aero-Bistro androids to start [
].”
Lily said, “And I’ll [
].”
“And Katie,” said Jasper, “you can [
].”
Lily said, “But don’t forget [ ].”
“Right-o,” said Jasper. He lifted off his mask. The others lifted theirs off, too. Katie’s face was all red and wet. She panted for air.
“Thank goodness,” she said. “Planning makes it hard to breathe.”
If you want to guess their plan, you’re welcome to.
Here’s your clue: Later that afternoon Lily and Katie went to their favorite used-record store. It was a great used-record store, underground in the basement of a lounge-upholstery repair shop. There was fake tiger and leopard skin hanging from the walls, and all the pipes were painted red. The employees had hair that stuck out in different directions. Whenever Katie and Lily would go in to look for used CDs, someone would say, “Heya! It’s the woosome twosome!”
Which didn’t make any sense, but it’s just nice to have people say something about you sometimes.
Katie and Lily looked through a big bin of vinyl records.
They chose a stack of them.
They went to the register.
They paid. They got $4.01 in change.
It was all part of the plan.
The next morning the sun rose around dawn. Nothing seemed unusual about the day: The dew was on the grass. People walked their dogs. The Pelt Observer featured stories about bake sales, weddings, and movies. Cereal boxes tipped toward bowls. Ora
nge juice spilled on kitchen counters. Seagulls paced up and down the piles at the dump.
And yet, it was the day that whales invaded North America.
Jasper was talking to Lily on the phone before she left for school. Jasper called from his Marvelous Subaquatic Zephyr.
“I don’t see hide nor hair of the whales down here. It will be a super ruckus, though, when we finally get to biff them.”
“Did you go where you saw the squid target practice?”
“Yes indeedy. I’m there right now. Nothing left but the burned-up wooden squid. Rotten luck that you have to go to school. It would be ace if you and Katie could join me.”
“I would stay home from school, but I’m in trouble with my dad. He found out I called the Coast Guard and the army and told them about Larry.”
“I’ll keep looking for our old pal Lares, and for his dastardly cetacean scoundrels. They must be on the move.”
“I’ll try to get out of social studies when they show up,” said Lily. “So that we can get to ... you know... carry out the plan.”
There was a silence as they both thought about the trials of the coming day.
“I’m frightened,” said Lily. “Really frightened.”
“Tosh! Don’t worry about a thing. Your plan is genius,” said Jasper.
“I’m not so sure. If something doesn’t work out—”
“What’s wrong, Lily?”
“Everything could burn.”
“We have faith in your plan.”
“I know,” said Lily in the smallest voice she had. “That’s what’s so frightening.”
“Lily,” said Jasper, “we’re going to do the best we can. Don’t fear. Not everything will burn.” There was silence on the line for a minute. Then he said, “For example, things that aren’t flammable. Rocks, Lily.”
Lily didn’t say anything at her end of the phone. Jasper was altogether too sure of things.
“I’ve got to go,” Jasper said. “I need to find these fellows before they emerge from the sea.”
“All right,” said Lily.
“Good-o, then. Over and out?”
“Be careful, Jasper.”
“I will, Lily. You, too.”
Lily hung up. She cleared the table of the breakfast dishes. Her father and mother were talking in the other room. Suddenly the phone rang. Lily picked it up and said hello.
“Oh, hey there, hey there,” said a voice. “Is this little ... Gefelty’s little girl?”
“This is Lily,” said Lily.
“Great. Great! This is your dad’s boss, Larry. Is your dad there?”
“Sure,” said Lily, fumbling with the phone. “Sure. Sure! I’ll—I’ll get him, then. While I go into the other room—how are you?”
“I’m good. Real good. How ’bout you?”
“And where are you? Are you at work?”
“Yeah, in a manner of speaking. Today’s a big day for me. I have a lot of scrapple on my plate today. Hey—is your dad there?”
“I’m just—I’m getting him.”
“That’s great, ’cause I need to talk to him.”
Lily had an idea—a way to find out where Larry was. “Can he call you back?” she said. “Are you at the warehouse?”
“Naw, naw. I’m not there right now. I’m in a yacht out in the harbor. Can I leave a message? Where is he? Is he in the little boys’ room? Because if so, could you just tell him to hurry up in there?”
“He’s—I can give him a message.”
“Tell him he doesn’t need to come into work today. He and the rest of the team have done a great job, and they can take the day off. You know what I’d do, for instance? Maybe go horseback riding. Or skating, if he has access to an indoor rink.”
“Okay. Thanks. Oh, incidentally, can you see the warehouse from there?”
“Uh, yeah. Why you ask? Is there something wrong with it?”
“No, no. I’m just—I’m just asking.”
“Okay. Look, you take care of yourself. Have a good day in school or whatever. You know what I always found? In math the answer is usually seven. Alrighty. Keep in touch. Bye.”
Larry hung up.
Lily ran into the living room. “Dad! Dad! Larry called and—”
Her mother and father were gaping at the TV. “Larry called?” her dad asked. “Thank goodness. That means he’s safe.”
“He said you don’t have work today, and not to worry, and that your team did a good job.”
“Of course we don’t have work today,” said her father, pointing at the TV screen. “The walls of the Abandoned Warehouse blew apart from the inside five minutes ago, revealing... I just can’t believe this—there’s a huge antenna and an army of walking whales!”
On the screen the whales were in formation, their eyes blazing, crunching through rubble.
Lily gasped. They were on the move.
The attack had begun.
If you have ever been present at a vicious attack by elevated sea animals, you’ll know exactly what the people of Pelt felt like. I, for example, was unlucky enough to be working as a house-painter in Minneapolis that terrifying summer of the Manatee Offensive. That was awful. The sky was black with them.
Of course, the manatees weren’t on stilts but wore small helipacks. The sound of those little helicopter blades chuddering in the summer air was overwhelming. It takes a lot to lift a manatee. You couldn’t hear anything but the sound of them flying in their swarms while people honked their horns or ran for cover, weeping like babies.
I had a friend who had also lived through a starfish attack, and during the manatee assault he pretty near fell apart. We were hiding in the frozen-food aisle of the Third Avenue Halt ’n’ Buy. The manatees were buzzing around the parking lot just outside. My friend screamed and began to jump up and down on boxes of Mrs. Paul’s Fish Sticks.
We all have our ways of dealing with stress.
When Lily’s father panicked, he really panicked. He was trying to coax her and her mother to go down to their “bomb shelter.” The “bomb shelter” had been set up by a couple that had lived in the house in the 1960s.
“Come on!” said her dad. “We’ll take the radio!” He stuffed his arms with magazines and cushions. “We can hear about what happens.” He disappeared around the corner. “I’m going to grab some shirts!”
“Honey,” said Lily’s mother, “I’m not going down there.”
“You’ll be safe! You’ll be safe down there! Come on!”
“All that’s down there is the Ping-Pong table. How will the Ping-Pong table keep us safe?”
“We can play Ping-Pong until this whole thing blows over. And eat canned food.”
“I’m not eating the canned food. The canned food expired during the Cold War.”
“Well, Lily, will you—”
Lily’s dad skidded back into the room. Her dad and mom looked around.
“Lily?” they said. “Lily?”
But Lily was gone.
Lily was not in the living room because she had darted out the front door. She was already riding her bike down to Smogascoggin Bay. Everything was crazy down there. People flew past in their cars, usually 1950s cars, escaping. The whales had walked right through a vintage car rally. People fled past Lily. Many of the cars had fins, and were pink or green, and women in head scarves drove them, pointing backward and going, “AIEEEEE!”
Swaying above them all, outlined against the fresh morning sky, were the ominous shapes of the whales. They towered thirty feet high, their eyes glowing. They had spread their flukes. They drooled from their wet baleen. They bared their teeth (those that had them).
Lily stopped on her bike and stood for a second at the crest of a hill. She stared with horror at the scene of destruction in the valley before her.
The huge mammals had stomped through the center of town. Behind them, down near the bay, was the business district of Pelt, the streets rucked like rugs with whale stilt prints. On the site of the Abandoned Warehouse
was a giant pyramid-shaped antenna. Lily could just barely see the radio waves spreading out from it in circular ripples.
The whales did whatever the radio tower commanded. They stepped on used car dealerships and a putt-putt golf course.
The town was behind them; they were heading across the pasturelands of outermost Pelt. They burned down trees in a trice with their laser-beam eyes. They stalked in rows through the countryside.
The cows were panicked. People in farmhouses screamed from their windows. Families were in Ford trucks, banging past Lily on dirt roads. Dogs barked crazily.
Lily stood, one foot on the ground, one on the pedal of her bike, calculating.... The whales weren’t headed her way.
They were headed for Decentville.... Why there? she asked herself. And then she realized— right past Decentville was the state capital.
Lily could only imagine what would happen if they reached the capital. They could take the whole state senate captive. They could hold the governor for ransom. Who knew what Larry had planned?
They had to be stopped.
Meanwhile, Jasper was scouring the bottom of Smogascoggin Bay. His subaquatic phone rang. He cranked it quickly to get it energized, then picked up the earpiece. “Jasper Dash, Boy Technonaut,” he said.
“It’s Lily. I’m calling from my dad’s cell phone. The whales are on their way through Decentville ... I think they’re heading to the state capital.”
“Good golly.”
There was a crackly pause. Then more softly Lily said, “My grandma lives in Decentville.”
Jasper shook his head. “This is awful, Lily.”
“We need to stop them.”
“As soon as I can find that archvillain Larry—”
“I found out where Larry is. He’s in a yacht—somewhere within sight of the Abandoned Warehouse.”
“I read you,” said Jasper. “I’m on it.”
“Good luck!” said Lily.