Chapter 29
The next evening Amy woke with a pout, angrily brushing her long blonde hair in the dusty candlelight.
"What's the matter?" Ruthie asked as she rose from her coffin.
"I woke this evening wondering whom I am to feed on now if we can no longer feed on the loathsome alcoholics who roam the alleys and waterfront," Amy set her brush on the table and began putting up her hair in the style Robert preferred. She had already dressed for the evening and laid out her cloak.
"You're asking me that question?" Ruthie responded, "I'm not even happy with you feeding on social rejects. We can't go any lower than that."
"I suppose we'll simply have to return to stalking violent husbands like Susie's or killing people and leaving dead animals nearby," Amy suggested, "Susie confirmed that that trick worked."
Susie rose still wearing her new clothes and joined them at the table, "What are you talking about?"
"Amy is upset that we can't feed on drunks on the streets anymore, since they all seem to be members of Reverend Williams' flock," Ruthie explained.
Susie contemplated the problem and replied, "If we kill Reverend Williams we can get our blood supply back."
"Good Lord, Susie!" Ruthie said, "We cannot kill a man of God."
"But he's only a 'self-proclaimed' man of God," Susie explained, "he's not a real man of God. He doesn't have a church."
"That doesn't matter," Ruthie argued, "if he's a man of God, then he's a good man. Besides, don't you think the authorities would start to be interested if Reverend Williams was killed after he's been complaining about his members being killed?"
"That could be," Susie replied as Amy looked on with interest, "but if his body is never found no one would even notice or care about his disappearance."
"Yes," Amy seemed hopeful, "if his body simply disappears, the authorities would simply assume that he went back to wherever he came from."
"No!" Ruthie jumped from her chair knocking it over, "you cannot kill a man of God!"
Susie and Amy exchanged dismayed glances and Amy said, "What if we prove that Reverend Williams is a bad man?"
"He's a reverend," Ruthie insisted, "it's not possible that he's a bad man."
Amy glanced confusedly at Susie and said to Ruthie, "We need to remove Reverend Williams one way or another. If we can prove him to be bad we can remove him permanently, but first we must find him."
Annoyance over the unresolved dispute over the fate of Reverend Williams caused tension between the three vampires as they set out into the windy late autumn evening determined to find the man whose suspicions of murder in the city could expose and destroy them. Even Amy had readily agreed to visit the city stables again to feed so they could focus the entire night to finding Reverend Williams. Leaving the frightened horses neighing and stamping in their stalls, they slipped directly into the shadows of the large old trees across the street from the City Hotel. Silently they waited as the gusty winds blew their cloaks around them, picking up and carrying leaves, debris and dust along the street.
As they waited watching for any man resembling a minister leaving the hotel Amy fretted about the damage the wind must be doing to her carefully arranged hair as her hood was pushed and pulled by the gusts. Susie watched the hotel as a cat watches a mouse hole, hoping to quietly stalk the interfering reverend. Even though she would love to kill the man tonight and be done with him, she was reluctantly willing to respect the agreement between Amy and Ruthie that the self-proclaimed reverend would need to be proven bad before they would allow themselves to kill him. Ruthie, although confident Amy would adhere to their agreement, dreaded the entire situation and somehow knew that Amy would find a way to convince her that Reverend Williams was indeed a bad man who fell into Ruthie's definition of an acceptable victim. Then Ruthie would have the unbearable guilt of having been accomplice to murdering a man of God.
"Could that be him?" Susie asked excitedly gripping Amy's arm as her eyes followed a pale man in black exiting the hotel and walking in the direction of the wharves.
"What do you think, Ruthie?" Amy watched the man as he held his hat to his head during a strong gust of wind.
"That could be the reverend," Ruthie assented, "I've seen them wearing that type of flat hat before."
Let's trail him before he gets too far away," Susie stepped forward.
"Be careful, Susie," Amy warned, "he's already suspicious and must be watching carefully for suspicious people or odd behavior."
"Yes," Susie agreed, "we can follow in the shadows and at a distance, but we need to be close enough to hear his conversations."
"Maybe hearing some preaching will keep the two of you from killing him," Ruthie suggested as she trailed behind her companions.
"No chance of that," Susie laughed.
Following safely at a distance the three vampires were soon certain that this man was indeed Reverend Horace Williams as he searched every dark alley and corner of the city for his congregation members. They watched while he handed out bits of bread to the wretched men whose souls he hoped to save and deliver to Jesus.
After a few hours of this Amy became bored, "I don't see any way of accusing this man of being cruel, immoral or self-serving."
"Stop pouting," Susie scolded, "we haven't been watching him for very long. What could be his purpose in caring for these useless men?"
"Because he's a man of God," Ruthie explained, "I told you he has to be a good man. He's following the example of Jesus by helping the less fortunate. His only plan for himself is to spend eternity in the Kingdom of God. He's cleansing his soul."
"What did he do to feel his soul needs cleansing?" Susie wondered out loud.
"Oh!" Amy exclaimed with renewed hope, "you think his past holds an evil secret for which he is now attempting to repent?"
"Of course," Susie said, "why else would he be performing these useless acts?"
"The two of you don't understand Jesus at all!" Ruthie exclaimed in exasperation.
"I know what you're saying," Susie said, "but this is a real man not Jesus. There has to be some sort of reward for him."
"I told you what the reward is," Ruthie insisted, "a clear conscience and eternal life in heaven."
"There must be something bad about him," Amy said, "we must continue to watch him to learn his motive."
"Why can't you believe he's an honest man of God?" Ruthie argued as she continued to follow Susie and Amy.
"For one thing," Susie said, "he's only a self-proclaimed man of God. Who knows why he has chosen to pretend to be a minister. Because he's not a real minister he can only hope to recruit the people who were cast out of respectable churches or people who cannot fulfill the requirements of being a church member. They are considered to be immoral and unrespectable. For another, if he truly wanted to become an ordained minister, why doesn't he become properly educated and thereby earn the status of a real minister? There must be something he hopes to achieve by simply proclaiming himself reverend with no authority."
"Yes," Amy said, "I agree."
"Of course you agree," Ruthie said to Amy, "you want any reason to discredit him to be able to make a victim of him."
"Just as you would look for any reason not to," Amy argued.
"What are you so terrified of, Ruthie?" Susie asked, "Why are you so dedicated to denying yourself, and us as well, the need for blood? I've only known you for a few days and I'm getting a little tired of your constant restraint. I have never known anyone in my life as full of self-hatred as you!"
"Susie!" Amy was astonished, "how can you speak to Ruthie so? She is the sweetest person I've ever met. How can you accuse her of self-hatred?"
Ruthie seemed more hurt than surprised at Susie's accusations, "I am nothing but a tool of the devil. We all are. Why wouldn't I hate myself?"
"Ruthie!" Amy said and led her two companions into an alley, "how can you feel that way?"
"How could you have not known it?" Susie asked.
"Well,
" Amy looked down in shame, "we have discussed this before. We've accepted who we are and what nature has forced us to do to survive. I've also deeply apologized for transforming Ruthie into what she is. I still deeply regret it, but knowing Ruthie has made me a better person."
"And I've forgiven you," Ruthie looked at Amy and then at Susie, "but it doesn't change who I am and I can still do whatever I can to repent and hope that God will forgive me someday. But I know he won't forgive me if I simply accept the idea that because of what I am I have the freedom to kill whoever crosses my path."
"What about the idea that you're already a sinner and there is no way to repent?" Susie asked.
"I cannot believe that," Ruthie said, "I have to have hope. Without hope there is no reason to live."
"And I respect Ruthie's beliefs," Amy said, "Ruthie is like a sister to me. She's the best friend I've ever had. I had hoped that when we transformed you that we could be good friends as well, Susie."
Susie looked at the both of them, murderers, yet so full of hope and the desire for peace and friendship. Her life had been so full of hardship, abuse and sacrifice. She had always felt so powerless and resentful, but with her new physical power she felt strong and eager to take advantage of this power. She couldn't understand why her two sires were so inhibited and so determined to hold onto hopes and dreams that were so unrealistic. Amy dressed and behaved in the way her former lover preferred in the hope that he would return and find her unchanged and appreciate her for staying faithful to his wishes. Susie was certain Robert was gone forever, having tired of Amy and no doubt sired himself a new girl for his entertainment. She thought Amy was wasting her life missing a man when she could be using her power and strength to control her own life instead of waiting for the return of a man to dictate her life to her. Ruthie harbored superstitious hopes of going to heaven even though she was now a natural predator and murderer. The God she so deeply yearns for and obeys is one for humans, not for beasts and monsters such as herself, if there really is a God or heaven at all. Susie never hoped for much in life and was often disappointed when she did. She learned to live day-by-day only hoping that she had something to feed herself and her children each day. She became very practical, never having time or energy for friends since real true friends were scarce when they were all struggling and competing for the same scarce resources. Because of Amy and Ruthie Susie had to sacrifice her children, which she probably would have had to do eventually anyway. Leaving them alone while she went to work put them in more danger than waiting to starve to death and she convinced herself that the little girls were being cared for much better now than she could have done by herself.
"All right, Ruthie," Susie reluctantly relented, "I'll respect and follow your guidelines. Who knows, maybe there truly is a God in heaven."
Reverend Williams found what was left of his tiny congregation to be alive and safe this evening. He gave them all a warning about the recent deaths of the men he had reported to the authorities and called on God to protect the survivors through the night. He promised them each a cup of hot broth the following day if they visited the hotel for a short sermon. New members were always welcome so he offered bread with the broth to anyone who brought a guest. He didn't notice he was being followed the entire evening by the three vampires who lusted after the blood of his congregation. When he returned to his hotel room his stalkers returned to their lair to plan for the following evening when they would make another attempt at learning what kind of man he truly was.