Page 19
Author: Nyrae Dawn
I heard her scramble behind me. “What are we doing?” she asked. Hell if I knew, but I kept walking anyway. And that’s when it happened. She stopped, and turned around. Our eyes locked, her green gaze grabbing me. I had the urge to punch Mattie and kiss her at the same time. I didn’t know which was stronger. They weren’t holding hands still, but that didn’t matter. I knew what he was thinking. I’d been him for so long that I knew he wasn’t serious about her.
But I didn’t do either. No kissing, no punching. I don’t know what made me do it. Maybe I wanted her to hurt like I was. Maybe I’d gone as mental as the female population seemed to be, but even as I did it, I knew it was a mistake. My hand jerked over and I grabbed Crystal’s, linking our fingers together in a clear message: Aspen had moved on and so had I.
Even though I hadn’t, but that was beside the point. Right now, I just needed something to do and this was the only thing I could think of. I had to give Crystal props, because she didn’t pull away. Her hand was tense and I heard her breath hitch, but she didn’t drop my hand.
“What’s up?” I asked, hoping my voice came out steadier than I felt.
Aspen didn’t reply. Her mouth was opened in a small “O”, her eyes matching it. I wanted to walk over to her, brush my hand across her face like I’d done this weekend, until she smiled instead of looking…hurt? Yes, that’s what she looked like and I realized that wasn’t what I wanted. Even though I was hurting, I didn’t want her to feel the same.
“You don’t look sick to me,” Mattie said.
“Huh?” Shit. I wondered if he would rat me out to the boss. “No one asked you. ”
My words seemed to snap Aspen out of her shock. “Who’s your date?” Her words were clipped.
“Who’s yours?” I asked, immediately wanting the words back. Who’s yours? Like I didn’t know who this guy was. This whole situation was really messing with my skills. “This is Crystal. ” I tried to cover up my idiotic screw up by tossing Crystal’s name at them.
“I know you,” Matt started. “I saw you guys talking at the party. ”
It was official. Before all this was over, I’d definitely be punching Mattie in the nose. His smirk told me he knew exactly what he’d just done. I groaned.
“Oh, I see how it is. So, I was the backup girl this weekend? Crystal at the party, me at the beach house and now you’re back to her? God, I hate you, Sebastian!” Aspen’s arms were crossed over her chest, something dark twisting the green of her eyes. Yeah, she was pissed, but so was I.
“What about you? You’re the one kissing me when you wanted this punk. ” I pointed to Mattie.
“Dude, watch what you call me,” Mattie replied and I stepped toward him.
“Or what? What are you going to do about it, Mattie?” Yeah, I used the name he hated. So sue me.
“Sebastian, maybe we should go. ” Crystal grabbed my arm, which made Aspen react.
“Maybe you should go. No one wants you here, anyway. ” Aspen told her.
Crystal snapped back. “Listen, I’m not taking sides here. I’m just trying to defuse the situation. ”
“Oh, aren’t you just the sweet, little girlfriend. Watch your back. He never sticks around for long. ”
“Hey!” I replied to Aspen. “No one said she’s my girlfriend and why do you care if I stick around? You had this loser in the wings the whole time!”
“Dude, I said to watch what you say to me. ” The idiot said.
Aspen started in on Crystal again, while I told Mattie where he could stick it. It was stupid, and loud, but I didn’t care. I had enough with this guy and I wanted to make sure he knew it. But, at the same time, I didn’t really want Crystal and Aspen to get into it either. People were circling around us, enjoying the show and all I wanted was this jerk away from Aspen.
“You better not be playing games with her,” I told him, but it was Aspen who answered me.
“Him? You’re the one who plays games. ” Her hands were balled into fists, but her eyes, the white was tinted red, like she was crying.
“I don’t trust him, Woodstock. ” He’d hurt her. I mean, I know I had hurt her, but I actually loved her too. That put me a little lower on the asshole scale than he was.
“You don’t have to. ” She turned to Mattie. “Come on, Matt. Let’s go. ” She grabbed his hand as they walked away and it took everything in me not to tackle the guy from behind, but instead I pulled my bonehead number whatever move.
“Aspen! He doesn’t deserve you! I know what I’m talking about! You came to me for help, remember? I know this shit!” I was yelling. Through the mall. See what love does to you?
A hand clamped on my shoulder. “Sir, we’re going to have to ask you to come with us. ”
Oh, shit.
Chapter Fourteen
Getting kicked out of the mall was not one of my finer moments. Dinged my ego a bit more when they had to call my mom. Something about me being a minor. Whatever.
“You’re going to have to explain this to me, Sebastian. I get called out of work because you were screaming in the middle of the mall? What’s gotten into you?” My mom asked, crossing her arms in pissed-off mom mode while we stood by her car in the parking lot.
Love. Girls. Insanity. I had quite a few words I could throw at Mom about what had gotten into me, but I settled on trying to smooth things over. “It’s not that big a deal, Ma. You know how mall cops are. He just wanted to flex his muscles. ”
Her eyes narrowed and I’m not afraid to admit it, my heart rate kicked up. This was beyond mad, into irate territory.
“This isn’t a joke! I had to cancel a class to come and get you. They said you were yelling at a girl? I raised you better than that, Sebastian. ”
Yeah, she had. If there was one thing she always told me it was to respect girls and what had I done? Yelled at Aspen. My best friend. In the middle of the mall. How had things gotten so royally messed up? But it wasn’t my fault. I’d been trying to do exactly what my mom taught me to do and that was to not hurt a girl. “I know. I’m sorry. It was a misunderstanding. ”
“It was my fault. I started it. ” I looked over my shoulder at Crystal who had been giving us some space. “I was having a bad day and took it out on Sebastian. I didn’t mean to get us in any trouble. ”
I closed my mouth so the shock wouldn’t show. This girl was totally saving my butt. “See, Ma? We’ve made up. ” I looked at Crystal. “But it wasn’t your fault. I’m sure I deserve some of the credit for this. ” I put my arm around her so it would look like we’d been the ones fighting and now we were all peachy. Mom sighed.
“I don’t like this, but I have to get back to work. I don’t want something like this happening again, Sebastian. ” She looked at Crystal, then me, then Crystal.
Oh! “So, sorry for yelling at you. ” I kicked at the ground. I hated apologizing for stuff I did. Saying sorry for something I didn’t do sucked even worse.
“No harm, no foul,” she replied.
“Come on. I need to drop you off at home before I go back into work,” Mom told me. Crystal piped up next and offered a ride, which my mom reluctantly agreed to after telling me she wanted me not to leave the house for the rest of the day.
When we were locked away in Crystal’s car, I turned to thank her, but she cut me off. “Don’t even think about saying thank you. What the hell did you pull in there?”
Oops. Looked like I traded in pissed off mom for another angry girl. “I don’t know! It was a reflex. ”
“It was a pretty stupid one! I mean, I get you not trusting that guy since he was definitely calling my cousin this weekend to try and get in her pants. ” My whole body froze up. I knew I didn’t trust that guy! Why did I break up with her just so some other guy could play games with her? I’d meant to save her pain, not make her prey for someone else. “I guess it could be different with them. It’s ob
vious she likes him. ” It was obvious she liked him? I didn’t see that. Or maybe I just didn’t want to see it. She was supposed to like me, not that jerk.
Oblivious to my mixed-up thoughts, Crystal kept talking, “None of that really matters though. Do you not know girls at all?”
With that one little question, a light bulb went off in my head. I did know girls. When it came to the opposite sex, I knew how to get what I wanted. I was The Hook-up Doctor, right? And yeah, I know I’d just broken up with her, but I did it for her own good and Mattie wouldn’t play by those rules. He’d hurt her, so really, if I put a plan in action to get her back, I’d be doing it for her own good. But then, what about the rest of it? I’d gotten more proof love didn’t work since Mom’s ex-putz broke up with her, but really this was more about saving Aspen than my love for her. Okay, so I was probably a little delusional with that one, because the pain in my chest when I saw her with him devastated me, but saving her from Mattie playing her was worth it.
Plus, I hated losing. I couldn’t stand the thought of him with her not just because I loved her, but because I hated him. Did that make me a jerk? Probably, but there wasn’t much I could do about that. This was it. I was doing this for Aspen’s own good. “Hey. I need you to be my girlfriend. ”
“What?!” Crystal jerked her car to the side of the road.
“Well, not really, but I want you to pretend to be with me. I need your help to win Aspen back. ”
Crystal looked skeptical, shaking her head. “Not so sure that’s the right way to go about this, Sebastian. ”
I laughed. If anyone knew how to get the girl, it was me. I wasn’t going to let Matt do to her what I was trying to save her from. “Trust me. I know what I’m doing. ”
***
My hands were shaking. Shaking. Like I’d never gone out with a girl before. Of course I wasn’t really going out with this one, but it would look like it after tonight. It felt wrong, a heavy weight embedded itself in the pit of my stomach and I couldn’t get rid of it no matter what I did. I didn’t understand it. This should be a piece of cake. All I had to do was pretend I was over her. Play the whole nonchalance game I’d told so many girls to play in the past. Make it look like I’d moved on, so she would want me more. Hopefully, in the meantime, I could get something on Mattie, some kind of proof that he was an asshole before he had the chance to prove it by hurting Aspen. I doubted she would believe me if I told her Crystal said he tried to land her cousin.
Then I could swoop in and get the girl. I had no idea what I’d do with her once I had her, because I still didn’t trust the whole love thing.
It was all so easy. It should be easy, but instead it felt…wrong. Not the whole getting Mattie out of the picture thing or even the getting the girl thing, because I did still love her. I think if anything, seeing her with him made me realize I loved her even more than I thought I had, but something felt off and I couldn’t put my finger on what it was.
This had been the only time I liked the gossip of a small town. I heard through the grapevine that Pris and Aspen were going to be at the arcade tonight. All it took was one phone call to Jaden and he was game to go out. Crystal took a little more persuasion, but in the end, she agreed. I stood out front of my house waiting for her in a pair of blue jeans, black t-shirt and a blue button up shirt over it, left open.
I mumbled a “hi” to her when I got in the car, my stomach feeling like I imagined Aspen’s did the night she spewed all over my ex-lucky shirt. Aside from the directions I gave her, we were quiet the whole way there.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” she asked after we parked. “If you are serious about her, you should just talk to her. I can’t tell you how much I wish Will would tell me he loved me. ”