exercises with Christ Jesus, why don’t you join a Living Church on Sundays? Leave me alone! As I said, you can’t do esoteric science along with Jesus-Christ; except you are crazy or stupid,” he replied.
“I can’t follow you; explain yourself please!”
“You dare ask me to explain? You come with discoveries and I am to explain; Good God! Go away before I get angry.”
“Please!” I insisted.
After a pause, he resumed:
“Esotericism is the art of seeking God in oneself, through sacred techniques and spiritual leadership from a spirit guide; it is also a science of developing sexual energy and working out to master it; otherwise, it teaches how to live sexual ecstasies. I am teaching you nothing new since these are the things you know. As for Christianity, you can explain better, now that you read the Bible.”
I felt the urge of hearing more; I was devoured by the desire to sense the extent of his knowledge of Christianity. What did he really know of Christ? Was he bluffing? My colleague poise kindled my interest and I wanted to be fixed on his knowledge of Christian doctrine. So I asked:
“What do you know of the doctrine of Jesus Christ?”
“Oh! My God! I beg: GO AWAY. I am busy enough!” he replied.
“Please, I want to know the difference between the two. I leave just after your answer,” I insisted.
“Which answer? You're the last of the ignorants. That is the answer! Yoga does not prohibit the Bible. Go and read some more pages. Please, leave-me ALONE!” he answered.
“Please, I beg; tell me what you know since we are here!” I insisted, yet annoyed by his reluctance.
He stared at me thoughtfully.
“How you can be burdensome!” he said, tiredly. “If you believe in the Lord Jesus, He gives you the Paradise, provided you follow every day the Holy Scriptures. With Christ, forget any development on your sexual energy, Pastors will tell you that it is white magic. We seek God in each of us, Jesus Christ reveals God to his followers; that is the big difference. Christians are limited by what Christ teaches them concerning God, we have god in us and we develop it, develop him, we develop it…, him, as I see you intend to draw me mad before you leave me alone!”
My colleague was confused as he advanced in his explanations. Throughout his speech, he revealed some interesting truths however.
Before I went away, I ventured a last one:
“What have you gained over all these years you’ve been practicing Tantric Yoga?
“Ecstasies! Oh! Yeah! Ecstasies of great standing and you'd better turn to Tantric,” he proudly said.
“I am already warned that Tantric Yoga is dangerous and requires too much resolve in doing exercises and a huge quantity of-”
“Don’t worry,” he interrupted, “when you're ready, I'll train you; you won’t leave it afterwards.”
I left the colleague, determined to go far in my research. I went home, entered my room and closed the door. I made my ablutions with alacrity and sat for a meditation. I had no effort delving into visualizations; my spirit guide came immediately and started a mental conversation. He was restless and worried. He opened:
“I see you now have much interest in Jesus. I have come to give you my advice as usual.”
I wanted to ask him questions about the veracity of reincarnation and karma. He beat me saying:
“I'll arrange a meeting between Jesus and you, to show you that you need neither the Church nor the Bible. You know, Jesus is the savior of everyone; He is not the Savior of Christians only.”
I listened, naive and curious. Didn’t he say before that Buddha was his master? How then could he speak of Jesus rather than Buddha? I accepted the offer, curious of the link I didn’t know that existed between my spirit guide and Jesus Christ. I stopped meditation and came back to reality. As the scene had displayed, I knew I had to take things seriously. “The things announced might happen.” However, I was held back by the failed initiation of Philip, the unanswered questions were many.
Before going to bed, I recited some ‘Christian mantras.’ Around 2.30 A.M., I had an unusual encounter. The scene resembled reality. The man I met was beautiful; he had a complexion like Jews and black hair like Hindus. He opened wide his arms and invited me to his embrace. I felt all that can be said of a strong love feeling. The embrace was comfortable and reassuring. After a moment, he looked into my eyes and said: “I really appreciate your loving the truth. You do well seeking for me and that's why I have come to you.”
We were in a huge room. The height of the room could reach 25 meters and its surface would be about 3000 meters square. The room looked like a temple. At the altar, there was a Buddha statue on the right corner. At the center of the altar, a throne and a sofa with a large angle over 160° in between. He invited me to sit on the couch where he also took place.
“You're a devotee that I particularly appreciate,” He said. “I want to congratulate you for every progress you have done with your guide... You're very lucky to see me and your life will change after this meeting.”
“Many thanks for the meeting,” I replied.
“I'm ready to give answers to all your concerns. Your guide has told you about me and you can ask me whatever questions you may have,” Jesus said.
I was moved, amazed and concerned about what I was experiencing. I proceeded with my first question:
“Reincarnation, Eternal Life, who is right?”
Silence; the answer took time. After a moment, He smiled and said:
“Do you have another question?”
“The Bible teaches to keep oneself from adultery, fornication and homosexuality; while my guide perceives them as natural experiences useful to self-fulfillment; who is right?”
Once again, He remained silent. I wanted to ask about the initiation of Philip; He beat me:
“Continue to read the Bible,” He said. “You'll see that there is no contradiction, man is saved by faith and not by works and the Scriptures say it well. If someone wants to obey the law, he must obey the whole law, your guide is not wrong; it is a matter of interpretation.”
“It's a matter of interpretation,” I voiced out before realizing I was in a dream encounter.
I was now awake. It wasn’t three A.M. yet and I resolved to read the Bible. I got up and walked to the living room where my Bible was. I switched on. The unpredictable stroke my mind and I jumped back. My heart and my body started shaking right away. My spirit guide was there – I mean the one I was used to meeting in visualizations and in dreams. There he was, sitting in a chair. He looked at me tenderly and said:
“You won’t read that book!”
It was my first time to see him physically. I stared at him, perplexed and dizzy. “What’s on? How is he here and how does he know what I want?” Fear sealed my lips and I felt unprotected. Noticing my frights and my tremors, the embodied-spirit tried to show kindness.
“You know I love you and cannot give you bad advice,” he affirmed. “Don’t worry my dear; go back to bed and everything will be okay. You know we have to prepare your trip to India and best surprises await you.”
“Jesus has just advised me to read the Bible,” I retorted.
“Yes, but it is late, do not forget your class tomorrow, you need some rest,” the spirit guide advised. “Don’t forget that the initiations continue next Sunday; you have to go rest.”
“Speaking of initiation, what do you say concerning that of Philip, since you seem to see everything?” I asked.
“Mind your own business and leave Maheshi manage his own,” he rebuked. “My dearest, go to bed please; be nice as usual and I will show you the best ecstatic experiences.”
At his words, I felt sexual desire invade my being and I lowered my head to distract my thoughts. I had no underwear and the bulging of my shorts was to bother me. As I was loitering in the lounge, the spirit guide rose up, started seducing teases, began approaching and I
fled into the bedroom. He outran me in the bed and started undressing in a provocative strip-tease.
I was terrified.
Arrogant and brash, the spirit guide was offensive and lewd in his language.
“Why are you so frightened tonight my darling? I'm here every day and every night; why are you afraid now? Come on! I so love you!”
My fears were growing up beyond bounds. My thoughts also were running erratically, stumbling at every step. Thoroughly confused, I defied the spirit guide anyway:
“Jesus Christ was considerate than you.”
Obviously, the comparison did not please the spirit. He promptly jumped down the floor, grabbed my neck with his right hand and said:
“Woe to you if you dare another comparison. You have chosen your side and you must assume it.”
He picked me up and threw my body against the wall before leaving.
I fell and sat down the floor, my back leaning against the wall. The pain was present in my right knee. I had hit the edge of the cupboard before reaching the ground.
The nightmare had stopped, but fears kept my heart captive however. My whole body was shaking and weeping seemed ridiculous. I had to assume my choice; had he said.
It was Thursday, about 8 A.M. when I woke up. I had slept in sitting position. I was free till the evening when I would have Hatha Yoga class. I made a very simple reasoning:
“If Jesus himself has asked me to read the Bible, the spirit guide cannot stop me. In the spiritual world, hierarchy is veneered and my spirit guide must submit