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“We have a safe house?” Ryder asked with surprise.
Ben grimaced. “Yeah, though the previous sheriff only used it as a place to house his latest mistress. I’ve slotted it for sale, since the county has no use for it. And I sure as hell have no need of the place. But it could come in handy in this situation. The security is tight, and there are cameras set up for outside surveillance. ”
“I’ll think about it,” he replied, moving back to his feet. “We should be okay staying at my place for the next day or so, but it might be a good idea by the time we’re expecting Radovich. ”
Ben nodded his head in agreement. “Just let me know if you change your mind and want to head over earlier. I’ll get someone from the station to drop the keys off at your place, and the house will be yours. ”
FOUR
GLAD TO BE GETTING THE HELL OUT OF THERE, RYDER CLIMBED into the Jeep, put the key in the ignition, and cranked the engine.
“Now what?” Lily asked, as she closed the Jeep’s passenger door and buckled her seat belt.
Reversing out of the drive, he said, “We need to get your things from the motel. ”
“It won’t take long, because I don’t have much. When I ran, I barely had enough time to grab some money and clothes. The only reason I have my toiletries and birth control pills is because they were already in my pack. I didn’t even have time to get my cell phone. ”
Birth control pills? Fuck. He wasn’t touching that subject with a ten-foot pole.
When she’d rolled over on the bed that morning, after he’d spanked her, her panties had still been around her knees, but he deliberately hadn’t looked. He’d known that staring at her glossy little bush and maybe even catching a glimpse of the pink folds between her legs was something he couldn’t risk. If he had, it would have been nearly impossible to walk away. And if he’d known she might let him fuck her without a condom . . . Christ. He wouldn’t have stood a chance in hell.
Three years might have passed since he’d last seen her, but the passage of time hadn’t lessened the way he felt about her. In a different lifetime, he would have wanted to thoroughly imprint himself on the woman. To mark her. Ink his claim into her blood and bones, so that he could own every part of her. But that wasn’t the fucking answer. Not in this lifetime. She was too damn young to know what she’d be signing up for with him. And he was too messed up to handle her. Trying to deal with her would drive him bat-shit crazy, and no doubt end up making her hate him within a month. Maybe even weeks. He’d want to tie her up and never let her go. Not for sex, though he definitely liked the idea of her bound and at his mercy. But just to keep her . . . safe. To keep her with him, so she couldn’t ever slip away.
A healthy relationship required trust. Something Ryder knew he didn’t and would never have in him. Not for her . . . and not for himself. And it wasn’t because he didn’t have it in him to stay faithful to a woman he loved and keep his dick in his pants. It was the sheer fact that he would never trust himself not to be a controlling, manipulative asshole.
That, and the fact that he’d be willing to destroy the goddamn world if it meant keeping her safe. If he ever doubted it, all he had to do was remember Minsk and the night his fucking face got ripped open. Then it became pretty fucking clear.
With the short conversation about her things at the motel over, he drove with the radio playing low, the windows down, enjoying the milder weather now that it was easing deeper into fall. He wanted to keep his mouth shut and just enjoy the calm while he kept his eye out for anyone following them. But he couldn’t do it. There was something he had to say.
“Listen, about Mike. ” He scrubbed one hand over the top of his head, then dropped it back to the wheel. “Don’t fall for his I’m just a good ol’ boy routine. He goes through women even faster than Jace did. ” Jace had been a member of the old unit, and the biggest womanizer the state of Virginia had probably ever seen.
Though he kept his eyes on the road, he could feel the heat of her stare as she turned her head to look at him. “You’re telling me this why?”
“I noticed the way he looked at you back at Ben’s. ”
“Hmm. I didn’t notice,” she murmured, sounding uninterested and like she had something else on her mind. “He was nice, but he’s not really my type. ”
Ryder snorted, finding that hard to believe. Mike was six-four, dark-haired, and green-eyed, with a face and body that probably stopped women in the street when they saw him. And there wasn’t a single scar that he knew of on the cocky jackass.
She looked his way again. “What? You don’t believe me?”
Rolling his shoulder, he said, “Come on, Lily. The guy’s a fucking Adonis. ”
“Yeah?” She lifted her brows when he glanced at her. “You got the hots for him?”
He grunted something gritty under his breath. “No, but I’ve got eyes. ”
Lily bit her tongue, wanting to tell him that he might have eyes, but he still couldn’t see what was right in front of his face. Not that it would do her any good. “Well, don’t worry about Mike. I’m not going to embarrass you by throwing myself at him or anything. I doubt I’ll ever even see him again. ”
He gave another masculine grunt, and they went back to not talking, until she said, “You don’t think Radovich would do anything to your sister, do you?” She’d never met Ryder’s sister, Shelby, but she’d read about her in his file. They had different mothers and hadn’t grown up together, but when Shelby had been a teenager she’d tracked him down, determined to have a relationship with the brother she’d never even met. She sounded gutsy and loyal, and Lily had a feeling that she’d have really liked her if they’d ever gotten a chance to know each other. She went on, saying, “Some of the things Ben said have got me worrying about it. ”
“I don’t think he’d target her. ” Stopping at a red light, he turned his head and caught her gaze. “But to be safe I called her in the middle of the night and told her to stay with friends until this is over. She wasn’t happy about it, but I promised her it wouldn’t be for long. ”
Oh. So getting rid of her quickly wasn’t the only reason he’d sped up the time frame with Rado. Knowing that made her feel a little better. Not much, but a little.
“I also made calls to the other guys in the old unit. ”
“What did you tell them?”
“I kept it short and simple. Just let them know to watch their backs and keep their eyes open. I didn’t mention Rado by name, but they know to be on high alert until I get back to them and give the all clear. ”
They reached the town’s cheapest motel minutes later, parking the Jeep in the crowded lot at the side of the long, rectangular building, and then made their way through the front entrance. Lily was pulling the card key out of her pocket, when a woman’s keening cries of pleasure echoed from the room across the hallway. “Wow. Someone sounds like they’re having a good time,” she murmured, sliding him a laughing look.
A grim smile twisted his mouth. “You just couldn’t ignore it, could you?”
“Where’s the fun in that?” She gave a soft laugh as she unlocked the door. They stepped into the room’s narrow hallway, the bathroom on their right, the bed around the corner, out of sight. She shut the door behind him, then turned and leaned back against it.
“What?” he asked warily, studying the look on her face.
“Nothing. ” With a little grin, she said, “It’s just that I always wanted to be in a sleazy motel room with you. ”
His expression tightened. “Stop talking shit like that. ”
“Sorry,” she offered with a shrug. “You asked. I was just being honest. ”
He caught her arm as she started to move past him, forcing her to look up at him. “You really wanted me to fuck you in a cheap motel room?”
His rough voice was thick with disbelief, and Lily made sure to put as much conviction into her gaze as she could as she returned his stare. “Sorry
to disillusion you, but despite my tender years, my Scott Ryder fantasies weren’t all pink and sweet and idyllic. Yeah, I liked the idea of being held in your arms all night, your body inside mine, while you made love to me. But sometimes . . . sometimes I just wanted you to put me against a door and make me come so hard I screamed, while people out in the hallway could hear every sound. ”
He sucked in a sharp breath, the grip on her arm tightening. She thought he was going to push her away, but she suddenly found herself pinned against the bathroom door instead. Then he loomed over her, his face right above hers as he stared down at her. Into her.
With his chest rising and falling from his hard breaths, he squeezed his eyes shut. “Fuck,” he whispered, his voice tight and low.
“What’s wrong, Scott? Did I shock you?”
His lashes lifted, and he glared from beneath his dark brows. “Shut up, Lily. ”
It was probably good advice. But she wasn’t going to take it. “You know what? You’ve got a bad habit of bossing people around. If you want me to shut up, you’re going to have to make me. ”
His hands speared into her hair, curving around her head as he tilted her face back. “Jesus! You just don’t know when to fucking quit, do you?” he growled. And then his lips were on her lips, his mouth claiming hers in a hard, violent kiss that was deep and wet and screamingly good. As far as first kisses went, she would have been willing to bet every penny to her name that this one topped the scale. He knew how to do things with his mouth that should have been freaking illegal, the raw, devastating hunger she could taste on his lips and tongue making her whimper with need. He kept complete control, tasting every part of her, the way he breathed and groaned and held her tighter as he sucked on her tongue letting her know exactly how much he was enjoying it.
“Scott,” she panted, when he let her come up for air. “I need you so—”
“Don’t make me say it again. Shut up, Lily. ” Ryder licked his bottom lip, tasting her there, and went back for a deeper taste of her intoxicating mouth. He didn’t want to hear what she needed. He just wanted to keep losing himself in her, pretending there wasn’t a mountain of reasons why he should stay the fuck away from her. Moving one hand to her ass and the other across her back, he kept her against him as he turned and went down on his knees, then laid her on the carpeted floor. He’d followed her down, his mouth still eating at hers as if she were some kind of fucking necessity, like water or air. But he couldn’t let her be something that he needed, and he had to make sure she understood that going in. So when he finally pulled back for a ragged breath, he looked her right in the eye and forced himself to say, “This is just sex. Do you understand that?”
“Whatever,” she groaned, gripping his hair as she tried to yank him back to her. “Just don’t stop. God, don’t stop. ”
Stop? He couldn’t have stopped if the cheap-as-shit ceiling crashed down on their heads. He’d wanted this for too damn long, and now that he had the feel and the taste of her under his mouth and hands, he couldn’t get enough of it. The way she responded to him was so fucking hot, it only made him that much more desperate to have her, his cock hardening to the point of pain. Christ, his goddamn hands were shaking.
Shoving her shirt up, he pulled the cups of her bra down and straddled her hips on his knees. Then he stared down at her pale, pink-tipped breasts. Hard. “Jesus,” he groaned, curving his hands under the tender mounds. “You’re so fucking beautiful. ”
“You like them?” she whispered shakily.
“I fucking love them. Your tits are perfect, Lily. Fucking perfect. ” He lowered his head, rubbing his nose between the soft, firm mounds, then turned his head and blindly took one of her tight, pink nipples into his mouth and sucked on her, working the delicious peak with his tongue. He hadn’t spent nearly enough time doing this when he’d had her against his front door the night before. There was no way to describe how goddamn incredible she tasted or smelled, her scent making him light-headed, while the taste of her skin just made him fucking hard as nails. At this rate he was going to do some kind of permanent damage to himself if he didn’t get inside her, his head only getting lighter as what felt like every ounce of his blood rushed to his dick.
Using one hand to lift her breast to his mouth, Ryder ran the other down her side, loving the way she trembled when he swept the curve of her hip then pushed his hand between her legs, palming her through her shorts.
“I need to touch you,” he panted, ripping at the button on her shorts then yanking them down with her panties. It wasn’t easy, since he couldn’t stop sucking on those firm, perfect tits long enough to move away, but he managed to get them past her knees. She helped him with the rest, working one foot free so that he could spread her legs wide and move between them. His hand went straight to her pussy, and this time there was nothing to keep him from stroking her bare skin, her tender folds slippery and warm beneath his callused fingertips.