"You're so sweet," he whispered between deep kisses that satisfied his need to taste, yet drove him to crave everything from her. "You make me lose my mind."
He'd lost it the instant he'd seen her hanging from the roof, his fear choking him, yet sensing even then how strong she was. From the moment he'd pulled her against him on that ladder and felt her lush curves, he'd wanted her.
She lit up something inside him that had never experienced such a bright and beautiful glow.
"Don't stop," she murmured, her lips on his.
He was as alive as the mountains around them, as full of joy as the squirrels chattering in the trees, as wild as the hawk flying over them.
A voice broke through. "Mommy, can I go swimming?"
Daniel expected Tasha to jump away, just as she'd pulled from his embrace with each of their two heart-melting kisses. But this time, she slid her fingers through his hair to hold him still as her lips took another sip from his. Then she laughed softly, sweetly, and moved to sit with her feet in the water just as the family appeared around the bend.
*
Tasha had tried yet again to do the right thing, to stop them both from taking a step that might hurt Daniel. But then he'd made her a promise that changed everything--he'd vowed he wouldn't let her hurt him.
Absolutely certain that Daniel Spencer never made a promise he couldn't keep, she finally gave in to the heat, the need, the desperate longing--and kissed him.
She'd known from their first two delicious kisses that it would be good. But she'd honestly had no idea how amazing good could be.
For the first time in a very long while, Tasha felt wildly free, with the sun on her head, the fish nibbling at her toes, and Daniel's taste on her lips.
"You're a naughty man," she said as he brushed his fingertips lightly over the sensitive skin of her collarbone, even as the family of four sat on the rocks only a hundred feet away.
Putting his free hand to his chest, he teased her with a wide-eyed look. "Who, me?"
When they were like this--laughing together in the sunshine--he almost made her feel like the last bad months had never happened. Like she was the lighthearted woman she'd been before she'd learned the truth about her family.
A woman who couldn't stop smiling as she said, "My brother and I were always outside as kids. Splashing in ice-cold streams. Climbing any tree we could get into." She waited for the pain to come from talking about her brother, but felt only the joy of their childhood instead.
Daniel's kiss--and his promise--were even more powerful than she'd realized.
"What else did the two of you do?" Daniel asked.
"We played lots of games. Our favorite was Stratego, that strategy game where you have military battles. He got used to winning, until one day he didn't win so easily anymore." She laughed at the memory of how stunned her brother had been once she became old enough to turn the tables. "One time we had a day out by ourselves with ice cream and hot dogs. It was wonderful. I saw this little china horse in a shop. I wanted it so bad, but I'd spent all my allowance already. Drew bought it for me." The memory was so poignant, she could remember the exact curve of her brother's smile. "I had it for years and years."
"What happened to it?"
It was so nice to finally talk freely about her brother, that when the pain hit, it was a sucker punch she didn't see coming. "It broke when I was packing up my stuff for storage before I came here."
Daniel curled his fingers around her hand. "How did it break?"
"I broke it." Just as the truth about her brother had broken her. Tears ached behind her eyes. But Daniel just kept holding her hand, a soft, soothing stroke of his thumb across the back. "I want so badly to believe in him. But how can I, after what he did? And for how long he did it? How can I forgive myself for being so blind all these years?"
Daniel didn't answer right away, until he began to speak with a pain she felt inside her own body. "You've probably figured out from talking with the guys this weekend that Evan's ex-wife was in no way worthy of him. None of us liked Whitney. She did a lot of really bad things." He stopped, staring out over the lake, then finally brought his gaze back to her. "She told unforgivable lies that almost destroyed Evan."
Tasha tried to swallow past the lump in her throat. "And here I thought you were going to tell me she actually turned out to be a nice person when you all got to know her."
He laughed without a hint of humor. "The more we knew, the more we hated her. But Evan was blind. And you know who else was blind? My mom. She defended Whitney up one side and down the other. She always found reasons for why Whitney did this or why she did that. She was our voice of acceptance. Until one day even Mom couldn't remain blind anymore."
"I'm so sorry."
"I'm not. Especially now that Evan's finally with the woman of his dreams. But my mom doesn't blame herself for not seeing through Whitney. She hasn't stopped believing in people. That's one of the things I love best about my mother--she refuses to let her faith be shaken by one truly rotten person. She still believes you have to look for the best in people until they prove you wrong." He gave Tasha's hand a tight squeeze. "Here's another miracle. Just when Evan was splitting up with his wife, his long-lost mother, who abandoned him when he was a kid, showed up, along with a brother and sister Evan never knew he had."
The trials Evan's family had been through were staggering. No wonder he was so intent on protecting Daniel. "How on earth did he deal with all that?"
"Paige. She was a rock for him, even when he stupidly tried to push her away."
Was Daniel trying to reveal something with that statement--did he think Tasha was foolish for trying to keep her distance after he'd offered her so much support?
"The other guys and I hated his birth mother for walking out on Evan when he was a kid and leaving him with his monster of a father. But Mom gave Evan's mother a chance to apologize, to make amends, and to love Evan the way she'd always loved him from afar. And I've got to say, over the last six months, having his birth mother and siblings around him has been really good for him."
"You've also forgiven his birth mom, haven't you?" Tasha asked.
Daniel held her with his gorgeous brown eyes. "You know what? I think I have. She made some really big mistakes, but she truly does love Evan." He caressed Tasha's cheek so sweetly a pang circled her heart. "Thank you for helping me see that."
"Maybe one day, I'll be able to forgive my family too," she said, her voice barely loud enough to be heard over the shrieks of laughter from the children several rocks over.
If she did find her brother and father through the feelers she'd put out, and if she was able to confront them, was there any chance their reckoning could lead to forgiveness?
Or would she only end up feeling more broken inside?
"I know how badly you want that," Daniel said. "Especially your brother. But if you ask me, the far more important question is--can you forgive yourself?"
She'd been staring at the water, watching the ripples, the sparkles of sunlight across the surface, when she had to bring her gaze back to his. "Like your mother forgave herself for being wrong about Evan's wife?"
"Looking for the best in people is one of the most admirable things about my mother," Daniel said, "even if she hasn't always gotten it right."
"I'd love to be like her." Admirable. "And like you--able to forgive. I'm just not sure I have it in me."
"I know you have it in you, Tasha." Daniel's gaze, and his touch, were as gentle and sweet as only a strong man's could be.
Then he kissed her until she wanted to believe him.
Chapter Nineteen
They returned in time to take the puppies for a walk, then Daniel fed Tasha another delicious barbecue dinner. When the evening turned chilly and the puppies crawled into their crate to sleep, Daniel piled pillows and an extra comforter in front of the fire.
The flames crackled soothingly, the wine he poured making her bones melt. But it wasn't really the wine.
r /> It was Daniel.
Their kisses by the lake had been beyond magical. But she still felt deeply conflicted about taking things any further when her life was still such a total and complete mess. How could he possibly want to get involved with a woman who came from a family of liars and con men, who had no job prospects, and who lived in a mountain shack?
"I should go," she made herself say, though it was the last thing she wanted.
"Don't go yet. I'm not done learning about you."
She felt like he knew absolutely everything about her by now. She'd revealed the loneliness she'd felt these last months. How hard it had been to leave her adult friends behind, the same way she'd left friends over and over again as a child. The way her father's words had ripped her in two back on that cold February day.
Daniel had helped her remember some of the good things she'd forgotten--fun, carefree times with her brother, how strong their bond had been as children. Daniel's support was also integral to helping her find the courage to get online and start looking for her brother and father. He'd made her take a hard look at whether she truly was so bad, so blind, so foolish--and whether giving up her own happiness was really a necessary part of making reparations to everyone her family had hurt. He'd made her question whether her sins were truly the same as her father's.
"Don't think, Tasha." Daniel obviously read her mind, recognized the panic rising close to the surface. Had he read the depth of her emotions for him too? "Just like I'm not going to think. Because if I do, I'll see that everything's going too fast for you. That you need more time to heal, to process, to trust again." He stopped, her own thoughts reflected in the fire of his gaze. "Please don't ask me to let you go tonight."
It was clear what he wanted, but he was giving her the choice, not forcing her. Neither seducing nor coercing.
More than anything else, he was asking her to be honest with him. As honest as he'd been with her. And she'd been trying so hard to keep him safe from her that she hadn't let herself admit how much she wanted him. How much she needed him.
Or how deep, how true, her feelings for him ran.
After everything they'd shared today, the thought of walking out that door tore something loose inside. Something he'd only just begun to help her stitch back together at the lake.
"I don't want you to let me go tonight."
His smile lit up the room, and in the next moment, he pulled her down, rolling her beneath him, whispering, "Are you sure?"
An answering smile bloomed inside her. "Completely sure."
He stroked the hair from her face. "It's still your choice. It will always be your choice. I will never take that away from you."
"I know you won't." She laid her palm over his. "I choose to stay." Though it felt totally unromantic, she needed him to know one more thing. "I'm on the Pill." She hadn't planned on being with anyone in the near future, but she'd kept the prescription for the other benefits, like regulating her cycle. "And I haven't been with a man for a very long while."
"There hasn't been anyone for me for a while either," he told her. "So you don't have to worry about me."
Trailing kisses across her cheek, he finally found her lips, teasing and tantalizing. He didn't rush--he savored. He whispered between each kiss--sweet, sexy, beautiful things.
"Your skin is so damn soft, you make me crazy." He angled, taking her mouth again. "I dream about you at night, how good you taste." She melted into his words. "I see your smile. I hear your laugh." He threaded his fingers through her hair. "And your tool belt drives me wild."
She laughed, and it felt wonderful and free. Tonight, she would forget her fears, her inhibitions. Wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him down, all that mattered was Daniel. His touch, his scent, his kiss.
He rolled her on top, and she kissed him until she felt drugged with his taste. Needy for more, she slid her hands beneath his shirt to feel bare skin against her fingertips. His muscles were taut, his body hard.
Then he switched it up again, taking her beneath him, one leg between her thighs, then the other, spreading her as though she were a feast. "I want to taste you everywhere." His eyes glittered, dark and hot, but he paused to let her respond. To say no if she had to.
Or to beg if she couldn't help herself.
The choice was obvious. "Yes, please."
His glittering gaze on her, he pushed up her shirt slowly, baring her abdomen, bending for a kiss, then a long swipe of his tongue. Her skin quivered.
"So sweet," he whispered against her stomach, sliding the shirt still higher, trailing kisses as he worked his way up.
Her need was so intense she panted, specially when he tugged her shirt over her breasts, tracing the edge of her bra with his tongue.
She didn't wear fancy stuff anymore. But Daniel had set her sexuality free again--and now she wished she could have worn silk and lace and satin for him.
Fortunately, he didn't seem to care in the least that she wore plain cotton as he toyed with the front clasp of her bra. "So pretty." He snapped it open, pushed the shirt and bra off, then sighed his pleasure, sending a wash of tantalizing warm breath over her. "You're absolutely gorgeous. Even better than my fantasies."
She arched into his mouth on her breasts, pushing her head back into a pillow as a long, low moan slipped from her lips. She was all liquid warmth, wanting him, needing him inside her as he turned her inside out. Made her wild.
She writhed beneath him as he laved the taut tip of one breast and took the other between his fingertips, circling, teasing, pinching lightly. She gasped for breath, dragging in air.
Yesyesyes fell from her lips as easily as her moans.
When he bit lightly on her sensitive flesh, she cried out, drawing up her legs to wrap them around his waist, holding him as close as they could get without stripping their clothes off.
With his mouth still on her breast, he shifted, pressing tight between her legs.
And she was lost.
*
As Tasha trembled beneath him, gasping, arching, crying out, Daniel moved his hips as though he were inside her, increasing the friction of their jeans between them. She shuddered with pleasure in his arms, and he savored her gorgeous cries and moans as the waves of bliss coursed through her. There were no words for how perfect she was--the beauty of her body, the muscles that rippled beneath her sleek skin.
He'd always been in control in bed--but with Tasha, his fingers fumbled at the fastening of her jeans, jerking the zipper. He'd never made a woman come with only his mouth on her breast and his clothed body between her legs. Just as he'd known from the start, something primal blazed between them.
He'd never felt this wild need for anyone. Never thought he would find a woman who could turn his world inside out.
Not until Tasha fell into his arms. Into his life.
And he was undone.
He wanted to make this so damn good for her, so much more than sex, more than pleasure. He wanted the intimacy they'd shared at the lake when they revealed their secrets to each other. He wanted to explore all her hidden places and make her forget everything but that they belonged together.
She laid her hands on him. "I need to see you. All of you."
Going back on his haunches, he pulled her up until they faced each other, her knees between his legs. She pushed his shirt up and off.
"You are so magnificent," she said, then lowered her head to his chest and licked him.
His hands shook with the effort it took not to grab her, take her, claim her as his. He'd never known pleasure could be so damn intense, quaking through his limbs, his muscles bunched hard against the need to have her right this freaking second.
Splaying her fingers over his abdomen, she teased along his waistband, flattened her hands against his rib cage. When she palmed his erection, he lost all control, hauling her to him.
"Do you have any idea how good you feel?" he asked, his voice rough.
She rubbed her cheek against his chest. "If it's
anything like how you feel against me..."
He had to kiss her again, had to taste the salt of their skin, his and hers together, before he came down beside her, laying her back so that he could gaze into her eyes. "Let me love you."
Her eyes closed at the word love, but she nodded. Mouthed the word yes.
This time he didn't allow his hands to shake as he parted her jeans and pulled them, plus her panties, past her hips and down her legs.
Gorgeous.
Slowly, he worked his way down her body, tasting every curve, every rib, the flat of her stomach, teasing her belly button. He'd never rushed through lovemaking. But he'd never wanted to linger for hours either.
Not until Tasha.
*
Daniel's mouth on her was an out-of-body experience. She was floating somewhere, her hands in his hair as she rocked against him, the intensity building inside.
Someone--she barely realized it was herself--made soft keening noises. "Daniel."
She'd never let go like this, not for anyone. A part of her had always been slightly embarrassed, worried she wouldn't be able to look her lover in the eye once the moment had passed.
But Daniel stripped away her fears. They were simply man to woman, yin to yang, lover to lover. She felt as though she knew him, as though she could say anything to him, do anything, ask anything.
And be totally accepted.
His mouth still driving her wild, he moved his fingers over her, then inside. A bolt of sizzling hot sensation burst over her, and she called out his name, her fingers fisted in his hair, her body arching, then bowing as he propelled her to the peak before pitching her off into sweet, hot oblivion.
She'd never held a man tighter.
And she'd never felt closer to anyone.
When she could finally move again, think again, she held out her arms. Reading her as though she'd opened the pages of her whole life to him, he moved up her body to hold her.
"Please." She couldn't remember ever begging before. But then, no man had ever given her such pleasure, such sweetness, as though he knew her mind and her needs completely. "I need you."
When he slid his hips into the perfect place and slowly--blissfully--moved inside her, she felt the immensity of their bodies coming together for the first time...and yet it was as though they'd done this forever. Dancing together in perfect passion.