Bren stared out the sliders in his living room, his hand braced on the wall. Skye, Dag and Val sat huddled around the kitchen table, trying to come up with all the different ways Loki could catch Frey by surprise, and how to avoid them. The best theory so far was Dag’s. He thought Loki would try to distract Bren while Thor captured Frey. The only problem with that, Val pointed out, was that Thor could not even try to cross the bridge without alerting the elders. So they moved on to working out the ways in which Thor might lure Frey over. Frey, his head in the refrigerator, suggested that he might use Frieda as bait, but Skye realized that it presented the same problem…Thor would have to cross the bridge to capture her. Unless, Frieda called over from our place on the couch, there were others involved in Asgard who would do it.
“No.”
We all looked up. It had been a while since Bren had spoken. He turned to us. “There’s no one else involved. None of the elders would let Thor near Bifrost, no matter what the potential reward. It’s too risky. And I don’t believe any of them would negotiate with Loki.”
“Thor is a god of honor,” Val said. “What makes you so sure he would?”
Bren’s smile was full of contempt. “Because it’s personal.”
“Want to elaborate?” Frey asked.
“There’s a reason Loki appealed to Thor and not somebody else.” Bren said. “Loki is a master manipulator. He plays on fears, insecurities, anger, hate, any negative emotion you can think of. Thor and I have been at odds for a long time. Thor would love to win this one, yank me back home, look like a hero to the elders, to my mother.” He took a steadying breath and continued. “All Loki would have to do is convince Thor that I should be taken first. Without me, the rest of you could be captured one by one.”
I shifted in my seat, cold terror running through me at the thought of Bren being taken away, of what would happen if Frey was dragged back to die in battle. Of how soon that battle would be.
Frieda threw an anxious look toward Frey while he popped a soda can and pretended not to notice.
“But Loki can’t take you.” She said to Bren. “How could he?”
Bren shook his head.
The panic rose over my head. I didn’t belong in a room full of gods who were bravely preparing for a fight. Bren was the most important thing to me, and I felt small and stupid for it. They were trying to save worlds, and the one thing I wanted to save was threatened by someone who scared me to the bone. I sprang up from the couch, headed down the hall and into the bathroom, and locked the door behind me.
I sat on the edge of the tub and dropped my face into my hands, pushing my fingers into the corners of my eyes to hold back tears. I caught a glimpse of the rug - midnight blue, the color that had swirled in Loki’s eyes the night I met him - and looked away. Even in the coolness and stark light of the bathroom, I could not quiet the nerves wracking my body. I took a few deep breaths, holding them as long as I could, and told myself that it would be okay. That there was a way to win this. Bren had told me once that he could do anything. I held on to that now.
When I finally opened the door, Bren was leaning against the wall, waiting.
“Okay?” He asked. I stared at him. He took my hand, led me into his room and closed the door behind us. I walked to the windows, turned and paced back to center of the room, closed my eyes and sighed, paced back and forth again. Bren watched me.
“It'll be okay,” he said. “We’re going to take care of this.”
"What does that mean?” There was a tremor in my voice.
“Thor needs Loki to pull off whatever they’ve got planned. We’ll get Loki first.”
“How?”
“We’ll figure it out, map out exactly how it’s going to go down. Then we’ll take it to him.” He shrugged. “He doesn’t have a chance against us.”
“If that’s true,” I said, folding my arms, “then why are you being so careful?”
He smiled, pulled me toward him. I peered up into his face and he brushed his hand against my cheek.
“I didn’t say he wouldn’t fight. He will. He’s slick. Calculating. He sees weaknesses and anticipates perfect opportunities to exploit them. More than any of that though, he’s patient, and that’s what makes him so dangerous. When we go after him, it’s going to have to be quick and aggressive. So our carefulness, as you put it, has to do with protecting everybody else, preventing this place from becoming a crater.”
I slumped. “That’s encouraging.”
He laughed, held his right fist over his heart and gave me a slight nod. “That’s Asgard.”
“Well this is Earth.” I pulled away from him, went over to the bed and dropped down on the edge. Then I grabbed his pillow and wrapped my arms around it, pushing my face into the linen to inhale his scent. “And I don’t want to lose you to someone who doesn’t even belong here.”
He walked over and sat down next to me. “You know, if I’d stayed where I belonged, you’d have nothing to lose.” He ran his hand over the back of my hair. “I wonder if I could’ve just left you alone, if I’d known all this was going to happen.”
I looked up at him. “Do you regret it?” I realized as I asked him this that I would never have chosen to go back to who I was before I knew him, no matter what happened now.
“No,” he said. “I'll never regret it. I just wish I could take away your fear.”
I closed my eyes, squeezed the pillow and breathed in his scent again, then felt him tug it from my grip. He slid an arm around my waist and kissed me. As I softened, he tossed the pillow behind me and pressed me down onto the bed. His mouth never left mine, and I finally gasped for breath under his weight.
“I can’t lose you,” I whispered against his lips. I couldn’t get close enough to him to calm my dread. I grabbed handfuls of his shirt in my fists and he hovered over me until I felt small underneath him.
“You’re not going to lose me.” He kissed me again, harder, his tongue peppermint cool on mine.
“What if - ”
“Shh.” He smothered my words, lacing his fingers through mine. “You’re not going to lose me.” He bent his head, dragged the collar of my shirt aside with his teeth and kissed my shoulder, his tongue moving in small, slow arcs. When I sighed, I heard a low growl in his throat. He let his arms buckle so that his full weight pressed on me and I braced myself for the crush, but it made me feel safer than I'd ever felt, and I thought I’d rather suffocate than let it end.
His breath grew hot against my skin and as I shivered, he released one of my hands to run his fingers down my neck. He looked into my eyes. In just a few seconds, I’d forgotten the impact of him. I pushed my free hand against his shoulder to steady myself, but the feel of him was like a freefall.
Ignoring my halfhearted attempt at control, he grasped my hip and then ran his hand over my waist, sliding his fingers underneath my shirt to touch my skin. The muscles in my stomach jumped and when he laughed softly in my ear, I felt the first real twitch of nerves. He glided his hand around to the small of my back and tugged me against him. I stiffened, my breath quick and shallow.
“Bren.”
His fingers dug into my flesh.
“Wait.” I was trembling. I heard the fear in my own voice and so did he. He stopped and let his body relax.
“You’re shaking,” he said against my neck. “Why didn’t you stop me?”
“Because I’m scared.”
He lifted himself up and gave me a confused look. “You didn’t stop me because you’re scared?”
“I don’t know what’s going to happen. I don’t know how much time we have to…”
“No. Nothing between us should happen like that. Not because you’re afraid to lose me.” He pushed his fingers into my hair and gave me a fierce look. “Everything’s going to be okay. I’m not going anywhere.”
I wanted to believe him.
I didn’t sleep at all, unwilling to waste
any of my time with Bren. I watched his face, listened to him breathe, wondered what Loki could do to tear our world apart. Bren was worried that I’d fall asleep at school and walked me back a little early. I didn’t argue, but not because I didn’t know the worth of those last moments with him before the morning came. It was because I did know their value, and I was preparing to gamble.
Chapter 27