Chapter 9
The floorboards in my old house always creak when I walk on them, which is why I begin to wonder where I am. I’m walking down the hallway, but they aren’t making any noise; it’s completely silent in the shadows.
Everything is so big and I can’t reach any of the doorknobs. There’s a twinge in the back of my mind, something trying to connect and break through, but I push it away. Ithinara is trying to break through, I think.
But I didn’t have Ithinara when I was in my old house, not really. A light flickers on behind me, drawing my attention away from the bad feelings. A thin line of light is all I can see, the rest of it blocked by the bathroom door. It’s brighter than I remember it being, and my mind is easily distracted. I move forward, expecting safety on the other side of the door.
I’m not sure why I’m scared, but I am. My heart is pounding, yet I’m certain on the other side of the door is where I’ll be safe. There’s something warm there, I know it.
My small hand goes to push on the wood but I pause as I hear a soft crying. The woman I’m searching for is sad and my heart hurts. My whole body hurts as my temples beat with my pulse. I push the door open, and find the floor covered in red, the woman kneeling in bloody water.
The bathwater is overflowing now, and after another sob she looks at me. Her green eyes quickly flash to something else, with larger pupils and narrow irises. Her brow furrows, and in her hand I see a small pocketknife.
I open my mouth to question her, but it’s too late. She rushes towards me, the knife in hand and lunges it at me. I grab it, wrapping tiny fingers around the blade as it slices into my hands.
A beeping wakes me from my nightmare. I’m confused, the world is a little blurry, and for a moment I think I’m still in the dream. But I’m not; I don’t know where I am. I almost want to panic, the scent of stale air and hand sanitizer floating around me.
“Waking up, finally?” a voice asks. “Took you long enough.”
“Sorry,” I croak. Am I late for school? Wait…what happened? My memory is fuzzy, and I can’t remember anything as I should.
I warned you, Ithinara says, and I realize it had been her talking before. I told you to kill him.
I blink the sleep from my eyes, but they still feel crusty and shattered. My body aches as if I had just done a hard practice for the Tigers, and something is stopping my wrist from bending. I shift my head, and find my wrist is wrapped in a cast.
Beside me my dad is asleep in a little chair, the bags under his eyes large, the wrinkles seeming deeper. My heart hurts again.
My mouth opens to call to him, but I’m stopped as a shadow drapes over me. The door to my hospital room is open, and someone has stepped into the doorway; Cain.
“Afternoon,” he calls, his voice sounding more charming than I remember. And then it hits me, I remember. I blush as I think of our kiss, then try to quell my fury as I remember he is the reason I’m here. He was fooling around, and I had to pay for it. He doesn’t even look the slightest bit hurt, despite the fact his side of the car was hit.
I furrow my brow, Ithinara nagging at the back of my mind. Cain steps into the room when I don’t reply.
“I’m so sorry about what happened,” he says with a smile, “I never intended for this to happen. I just wanted to have some fun.”
I glance at my father. “I don’t like your kind of fun,” I tell him, even though my heart is racing. The machine hooked to the little clip on my finger begins to beep faster. I curse it. “Just…go away before he wakes up.”
Cain glances lazily at my dad. “I’m not worried about him; I’m worried about you.” He’s lost his smile. “Are you okay?”
I’m not sure. My body aches, and there’s a cast on my wrist, but other than that I feel fine. Being able to feel pain is a good thing, I think. “I’m fine,” I say. “So just…go away.”
He nods and takes a step forward. Leaning over my bed, our faces are only an inch apart. I’m expecting him to kiss me again, and I’m ready to scream if he does.
Ithinara mumbles something, and it sounds like someone has a hand over her mouth. Cain whispers, “It’s a miracle you survived. Anyone else would have died in that kind of accident.”
“You were in it,” I state.
Cain’s hands rest on the bed, on either side of my body. The mattress dips under his weight, and he looks down at my wrist. “I wasn’t in the car, Willa. I went to grab us a coffee and you tried to—I don’t know, get to school?” He shrugs. “Only you would know for sure. I’m certain you weren’t trying to steal my car though, so I’m not pressing charges.”
My mouth hangs open. “I would never—”
“I know,” Cain interrupts. “I’ll see you around.” He bows his head slightly, his hair tickling my lips. In one smooth motion he’s already out the door, and I’m left with a hollow feeling in my chest.
LIAR! shrieks Ithinara. He lies!
I comb through my memory in hopes of making sense of his words, but nothing Cain has just told me adds up. He was in the driver’s seat, driving recklessly and toying with me. I know that. But still I question it. Had Ithinara taken over somehow, and manipulated my memory?
Ithinara is screaming again, so I lock her in the room in my head. She pounds against the door, but it becomes quiet enough that I can breathe. The heart monitor starts to calm down.
My dad snorts himself awake, and I laugh lightly. “Willa?” he breathes.
“Hi Dad,” I say. “Have a good nap?”
He rubs a hand over his face and leans forward before wrapping me in a tight hug. “Don’t you ever do that again; I don’t care if you were late for school. Late is better than dead.”
I bite my lower lip. “I don’t really remember what happened.”
After a quick squeeze he pulls away, putting his hand over my good one. “You were in an accident; you pulled out in front of a truck. I talked with Cain and he says you were adamant about not being late for school. Will, why on earth would you try to do that? He could have you arrested for trying to steal his car!”
“S-Sorry,” I stammer. “I won’t see him again, I promise.”
Dad sighs. “Cain isn’t the issue; he seems like a good kid. I’m worried about you, Will. Are you okay? Lately you’ve been…distant.”
I feel like crying, so I bite down again on my lip. “I’ve just been feeling stressed about college,” I lie, although it is partly true. “I’m still not sure what I want to do.”
“Sweetheart, you know it’s okay to take an extra year to think about it,” Dad says, giving me an encouraging smile. I can see the pain beneath it. “You can work for a year, take more classes if you want. Lots of kids do it.”
I nod. “Yeah, I guess so.”
Dad gives me another hug. “You know I’ll love you no matter what you do.”
I hug him back. “Love you, too.”
It’s clear he wants to mention the anniversary coming up, but doesn’t. I pray he isn’t going to try and make me go, because I’m not sure I could handle it. Not with Ithinara, not with Cain or Nico around. I close my eyes and try to feel comforted by my father’s presence…but he can’t protect me from what I know is coming.
Change.