CHAPTER IX.
The Influence of Faro Nell.
"Thar's no doubt about it," observed the Old Cattleman, apropos of thefairer, better sex--for woman was the gentle subject of our morning'stalk; "thar's no doubt about it, females is a refinin' an' ennoblin'inflooence; you-all can hazard your chips on that an' pile 'em higherthan Cook's Peak! An' when Faro Nell prefers them requests, she'sondoubted moved of feelin's of mercy. They shore does her credit, saidmotives does, an' if she had asked Cherokee or Jack Moore, or evenTexas Thompson, things would have come off as effective an' a mightysight more discreet. But since he's standin' thar handy, Nell ups an'recroots Dan Boggs on the side of hoomanity, an' tharupon Dan goestrackin' in without doo reflection, an' sets the Mexicans exampleswhich, to give 'em a best deescription, is shore some bad. It ain'tNell's fault, but Dan is a gent of sech onusual impulses that you-alldon't know wherever Dan will land none, once you goes pokin' up hisha'r-hung sensibil'ties with su'gestions that is novel to his game.Still, Nell can't he'p it; an' in view of what we knows to be thefemale record since ever the world begins, I re-asserts onhesitatin'that the effects of woman is good. She subdooes the reckless,subjoogates the rebellious, sobers the friv'lous, burns the ground fromonder the indolent moccasins of that male she's roped up in holywedlock's bonds, an' p'ints the way to a higher, happier life. That'swhatever! an' this dramy of existence, as I once hears Colonel Sterettsay, would be a frost an' a failure an' bog plumb down at that, if youwas to cut out the leadin' lady roles an' ring up the curtain withnothin' but bucks in the cast.'
"Narrow an' contracted as you may deem said camp to be, Wolfvilleitse'f offers plenty proof on this head. Thar's Dave Tutt: Whatever isDave, I'd like for to inquire, prior to Tucson Jennie runnin' herwifely brand on to him an' redoocin' him to domesticity? No, thar'snothin' so evil about Dave neither, an' yet he has his little ways.For one thing, Dave's about as extemporaneous a prop'sition as eversets in a saddle, an' thar's times when you give Dave licker an'convince him it's a o'casion for joobilation, an' you-all won't have toleave no 'call' with the clerk to insure yourse'f of bein' out early inthe mornin.' Son, Dave would keep that camp settin' up all night.
"But once Dave comes onder the mitigatin' spells of Tucson Jennie,things is changed. Tucson Jennie knocks Dave's horns off doorin' thefirst two weeks; he gets staid an' circumspect an' tharby plays betterpoker an' grows more urbane.
"Likewise does Benson Annie work mir'cles sim'lar in the conduct ofthat maverick French which Enright an' the camp, to allay the burnin'excitement that's rendin' the outfit on account of the Laundry War,herds into her lovin' arms. Tenderfoot as he is, when we-all ups an'marries him off that time, this French already shows symptoms ofbecomin' one of the most abandoned sports in Arizona. Benson Annieseizes him, purifies him, an' makes him white as snow.
"An' thar's Missis Rucker;--as troo a lady as ever bakes a biscuit!Even with the burdens of the O.K. Restauraw upon her she still findsenergy to improve old Rucker to that extent he ups an' rides offtowards the hills one mornin' an' never does come back no more.
"'Doc,' he says to Doc Peets, while he's fillin' a canteen in the RedLight prior to his start; 'I won't tell you what I'm aimin' toaccomplish, because the Stranglers might regyard it as their dooty toround me up. But thar's something comin' to the public, Doc; so Iyereby leaves word that next week, or next month, or mebby later, ifdoubts is expressed of my fate, I'm still flutterin' about the scenerysome'ers an' am a long ways short of dead. An' as I fades from sight,Doc, I'll take a chance an' say that the clause in the Constitootionwhich allows that all gents is free an' equal wasn't meant to incloodeno married man.' An' with these croode bluffs Rucker chases forth forthe Floridas.
"No, the camp don't do nothin'; the word gets passed 'round that oldRucker's gone prospectin' an' that he will recur in our midst wheneverthar's a reg'lar roll-call. As for Missis Rucker, personal, from allwe can jedge by lookin' on--for thar's shore none of us who's thatlocoed we ups an' asks--I don't reckon now she ever notices thatRucker's escaped.
"Yere's how it is the time when Faro Nell, her heart bleedin' for thesufferin's of dumb an' he'pless brutes, employs Dan Boggs in errants ofmercy an' Dan's efforts to do good gets ill-advised. Not that Dan iseasily brought so he regyards his play as erroneous; Enright has torebooke Dan outright in set terms an' assoome airs of severity beforeever Dan allows he entertains a doubt.
"'Suppose I does retire that Greaser's hand from cirk'lation?' saysDan, sort o' dispootatious with Enright an' Doc Peets, who's bothengaged in p'intin' out Dan's faults. 'Mexicans ain't got no more needfor hands than squinch owls has for hymn books. They won't work; theynever uses them members except for dealin' monte or clawin' a guitar.I regyards a Mexican's hands that a-way, when considered as feachers inhis makeup, as sooperfluous.'
"'Dan, you shore is the most perverse sport!' says Enright, makin' agesture of impatience an' at the same time refillin' his glass in hopesof a ca'mer frame. 'This ain't so much a question of hands as it's aquestion of taste. Nell's requests is right, an' you're bound to goabout the rescoo of said chicken as the victim of crooelties. Whereyou-all falls down is on a system. The method you invokes isimpertinent. Don't you say so, Doc?'
"'Which I shore does,' says Peets. 'Dan's conduct is absolootelyoncouth.'
"Dan lays the basis for these strictures in the follow-in' fashion:It's a _fieste_ with the Mexicans--one of the noomerous saint's daysthey gives way to when every Greaser onbuckles an' devotes himse'f tomerriments--an' over in Chihuahua, as the Mexican part of the camp iscalled, the sunburnt portion of Wolfville's pop'lation broadens intoquite a time. Thar's hoss races an' monte an' mescal an' pulque,together with roode music sech as may be wrung from primitiveinstruments like the guitar, the fiddle, an' tin cans half filled withstones.
"Faro Nell, who is only a child as you-all might say, an' ready to beengaged an' entertained with childish things, goes trippin' over tosize up the gala scene.
"Thar's a passel of young Mexicans who's Ridin' for the Chicken's Head.This yere is a sport something like a Gander Pullin', same as we-allengages in on Thanksgivin' days an' Christmas, back when I'm a boy inTennessee. You saveys a Gander Pullin'? Son, you don't mean sechignorance! Thar must have been mighty little sunshine in the life of ayooth in the morose regions where you was raised for you-all never todisport yourse'f, even as a spectator, at a Gander Pullin'! Itwouldn't surprise me none after that if you ups an' informs me younever shakes a fetlock in that dance called money-musk.
"To the end that you be eddicated,--for it's better late thannever,"--I'll pause concernin' Boggs an' the Mexicans long enough toeloocidate of Gander Pullin's.
"As I su'gests, we onbends in this pastime at sech epocks as Christmasan' Thanksgivin.' I don't myse'f take actooal part in any GanderPullin's. Not that I'm too delicate, but I ain't got no hoss. Bein' apore yooth, I spends the mornin' of my c'reer on foot, an' as a hoss isa necessary ingreedient to a Gander Pullin', I never does stand inpersonal on the festival, but is redooced to become a envy-bittenlooker-on.
"Gander Pullin's is conducted near a tavern or a still house so's theassembled gents won't want the inspiration befittin' both the seasonan' the scene, an' is commonly held onder the auspices of theproprietor tharof. Thar's a track marked out in a cirkle like a littleracecourse for the hosses to gallop on. This course runs between twopoles pinned into the ground; or mebby it's two trees. Thar's a ropestretched from pole to pole,--taut an' stiff she's stretched; an' thegander who's the object of the meetin', with his neck an' head greaseda heap lavish, is hung from the rope by his two hind laigs. As thegander hangs thar, what Colonel Sterett would style 'the cynosure ofevery eye,' you'll notice that a gent by standin' high in the stirrupscan get a grip of the gander's head.
"As many as determines to distinguish themse'fs in the amoosementthrows a two-bit piece into a hat. Most likely thar'll be fortypartic'pants. They then lines up, Injun file, an' goes caperin' roundthe course, each in his
place in the joyous procession. As a gent goesonder the rope he grabs for the gander's head; an' that party who'sexpert enough to bring it away in his hand, wins the hat full oftwo-bit pieces yeretofore deescribed.
"Which, of course, no gent succeeds the first dash outen the box, as agander's head is on some good and strong; an' many a saddle getsemptied by virchoo of the back'ard yanks a party gets. But it's onwith the dance! They keeps whoopin' an' shoutin' an' ridin' the cirklean' grabbin' at the gander, each in his cheerful turn, ontil somestrong or lucky party sweeps away the prize, assoomes title to thetwo-bit pieces, goes struttin' to the licker room an' buys nosepaintfor the pop'lace tharwith.
"Shore, doorin' a contest a gent's got to keep ridin'; he's not allowedto pause an' dally with the gander an' delay the game. To see to thisa brace of brawny sharps is stationed by each pole with clubs in theirwillin' hands to reemonstrate with any hoss or gent who slows down orstops as he goes onder the gander.
"Thar you have it, son; a brief but lively picture of a Gander Pullin'as pulled former in blithe old Tennessee. An' you'll allow, if yousets down to a ca'm, onja'ndiced study of the sport, that a half hourof reasonable thrill might be expected to flow from it. GanderPullin's is popular a lot when I'm a yearlin'; I knows that for shore;though in a age which grows effete it's mighty likely if we-all goesback thar now, we'd find it fallen into disuse as a reelaxation.
"In Ridin' for the Chicken's Head, a Mexican don't hang up his preynone same as we-all does at Gander Pullin's. He buries it in theground to sech degrees that nothin' but the head an' neck protroodes.An' as the Mexicans goes flashin' by on their broncos, each in turnswings down an' makes a reach for the chicken's head. The experimentcalls for a shore-enough rider; as when a party is over on one sidethat a-way, an' nothin' to hold by but a left hand on the saddlehornan' a left spur caught in the cantle, any little old pull will fetchhim out on his head.
"This day when Faro Nell comes bulgin' up to amoose her young an' idlecur'osity with the gayeties of Chihuahua, the Ridin' for the Chicken'sHead is about to commence. Which they're jest plantin' the chicken.At first Nell don't savey, as she ain't posted deep on Mexicanpastimes. But Nell is plenty quick mental; as, actin' look-out forCherokee's bank, she's bound to be. Wherefore Nell don't study thepreeliminaries long before she gets onto the roodiments of some ideeconcernin' the jocund plans of the Greasers.
"At last the chicken is buried, an' thar's nothin' in sight but itsanxious head. Except that it can turn an' twist its neck some, it'sfixed in the ground as firm an' solid as the stumps of a mesquite bush.
"The first Greaser--he's a gaudy party with more colours than you couldcount in any rainbow--is organisin' for a rush. He's pickin' up hisreins an' pushin' his moccasins deep into his tappedaries, when, as hegives his cayouse the spur, the beauty of Ridin' for the Chicken's Headbursts full on Faro Nell. Comin' on her onexpected, Nell don't see nopleasure in it. It don't present the attractions which so alloores theheart of a Greaser. Without pausin' to think, an' feelin' shocked overthe fate that's ridin' down on the buried chicken, Nell grips herlittle paws convulsive an' snaps her teeth. It's then her eye catchesDan Boggs, who's contemplatin' details an' awaitin' the finish withvivid interest.
"'Oh, Dan!' says Nell, grabbin' Dan's arm, 'I don't want that chickenhurt none! Can't you-all make 'em stop?'
"'Shore!' says Dan, prompt to Nell's cry. 'I preevails on 'em to ceaseeasy.'
"As Dan says this, that radiant cavalier is sweepin' upon the porechicken like the breath of destiny. He's bendin' from the saddle tomake a swoop as Dan speaks. Thar ain't a moment to lose an' Dan's handgoes to his gun.
"'Watch me stop him,' says Dan; an' as he does, his bullet makes ragsof the Mexican's hand not a inch from the chicken's head.
"For what time you-all might need to slop out a drink, the onlookin'Mexicans stands still. Then the stoopefyin' impressions made by Dan'spistol practice wears off an' a howl goes up like a hundred wolves. Atthis Dan gets his number-two gun to b'ar, an' with one in each hand,confronts the tan-coloured multitoode.
"'That's shore a nice shot, Nell!' says Dan over his shoulder, ropin'for the congratoolations he thinks is comin.'
"But Nell don't hear him; she's one hundred yards away an' streakin' itfor the Red Light like a shootin' star. She tumbles in on us with thebrake off like a stage-coach downhill.
"'Dan's treed Chihuahua!' gasps Nell, as she heads straight forCherokee; 'you-all better rustle over thar plumb soon!'
"Cherokee jumps an' grabs his hardware where they're layin' onder thetable. Bein' daylight an' no game goin', an' the day some warmbesides, he ain't been wearin' 'em, bein' as you-all might say innegligee. Cherokee buckles on his belts in a second an' starts; therest of us, however, since we're more ackerately garbed, don't lose notime an' is already half way to Dan.
"It ain't a two-minute run an' we arrives in time. Thar's no moreblood, though thar might have been, for we finds Dan frontin' up tofull two hundred Greasers, their numbers increasin' and excitementrunnin' a heap high. We cuts in between Dan an' Mexican public opinionand extricates that over-vol'tile sport.
"But Dan won't return ontil he exhoomes the chicken, which is stillbobbin' an' twistin' its onharmed head where the Mexican buries it.Dan digs it up an' takes it by the laigs; Enright meanwhile cussin' himout, fervent an' nervous, for he fears some locoed Greaser will cutloose every moment an' mebby crease a gent, an' so leave it incumbenton the rest of us to desolate Chihuahua.
"'It's for Nell,' expostulates Dan, replyin' to Enright's criticisms.'I knows she wants it by the way she grabs my coat that time.Moreover, from the tones she speaks in, I reckons she wants it alive.Also, I don't discern no excoose for this toomult neither; whichyou-all is shore the most peevish bunch, Enright, an' that's whatever!'
"'Peevish or no,' retorts Enright, 'as a jedge of warjigs I figgersthat we gets here jest in time. Thar you be, up ag'inst the entiretribe, an' each one with a gun. It's one of the deefects of a Colt'ssix-shooter that it hits as hard an' shoots as troo for a Injun or aGreaser as it does for folks. Talk about us bein' peevish! what doyou-all reckon would have been results if we hadn't cut in on the_baile_ at the time we does?'
"'Nothin',' says Dan, with tones of soopreme vanity, at the same timedustin' the dirt off Nell's chicken, 'nothing except I'd hung crape onhalf the dobies in Chihuahua.'
"About two hours after, when things ag'in simmers to the usual, an'Nell is makin' her chicken a coop out to the r'ar of the Red Light,Enright gives a half laugh.
"'Dan,' says Enright, 'when I reflects on the hole we drug you out of,an' the way you-all gets in, you reminds me of that Thomas Benton dog Iowns when I'm a yoothful child on the Cumberland. Which Thomas Bentonthat a-way is a mighty industrious dog an' would turn over aquarter-section of land any afternoon diggin' out a ground-hawg. Butthar's this drawback to Thomas Benton which impairs his market valyoo.Some folks used to regyard it as a foible; but it's worse, it's adeefect. As I remarks, this Thomas Benton dog would throw his wholesoul into the work, an' dig for a groundhawg like he ain't got anotherdollar. But thar's this pecooliarity: After that Thomas Benton dog hasdone dug out the ground-hawg for a couple of hours, you-all is forcedto get a spade an' dig out that Thomas Benton dog. He's dead now theseyere forty years, but if he's livin' I'd shore change his name an'rebrand him "Dan'l Boggs."'"