I spotted the lights from the lobby, like a bright beacon to warmer temperatures, as I rounded the corner. The more anxious I became to get inside, the more I seemed to shiver. My stomach growled, letting me know I had neglected to eat throughout the day. The plan was to strip out of my soaked clothes, take a hot shower, order room service, and whittle away the evening by watching TV.
"Hey, were you outside?" Monica asked as I entered the automatic doors.
"Nah, she just left her room through the secret exit outside," Michelle quipped.
"Don't be an ass. I meant are you crazy being outside when it's this cold?" Monica corrected.
"It wasn't too bad," I said through chattering teeth.
"Right, and Theo James is my new husband," Tina threw out. "You okay, honey?"
Chances were Michelle had filled in Monica and Tina on the full details of my fractured love life. At least, the version of the story I had spit out the night before. If they knew the latest turn of events, they might have wanted to take back their ill-placed concern. My forced smile stretched tightly across my lips. The urge to let them continue to believe I was the victim weighed heavily on the back of my mind.
"Alec didn't cheat on me and I kissed Greg." I spun around and headed for the elevators, leaving their mouths gaping in surprise. Greg, who showed up in time to hear my confession, looked as if he didn't know whether to stay and explain himself to the others or chase after me. I was actually relieved he'd been there to hear the truth. Not that I had lied to him last night, I just didn't have all the facts. Either way, I wasn't in the mood to offer him the rest of the story. I realized I was being selfish. After all, he had been there for me the night before when I needed a shoulder to cry on. Tomorrow would be different.
I tapped the button on the wall several times, believing it would somehow make the elevator arrive faster. When the doors opened, I jumped into the elevator and turned around to face my jury. They all watched me, just as I expected. Women could be harsh, and judgment and criticism were weapons, especially when cheating was involved. I know I would have been the first one to judge if the shoe was on someone else's foot. The doors closed, sealing me away.
***
The next morning, Greg's prediction proved to be right. We found out from the hotel manager that the roads in the surrounding area had been cleared. They had also hired a private plow to shovel their parking lot so the RV was no longer buried.
By nine a.m. we were all loaded up and ready to head out. Needless to say, I didn't get much sleep because I sat up half the night hoping Alec would call, and the other half stressing over how to deal with the rest of the bus tour with four former friends who no longer wanted to talk to me. Surprisingly, the barrage of accusatory questions I had been expecting never came. Everyone, including Greg, acted like nothing had happened. I climbed on board and sat on the couch, grateful for their consideration.
After making sure the ringer was at full volume, I placed my phone in my bag so I wouldn't be tempted to check it every few minutes. Even though I wished for it most of the night, Alec hadn't called. I guess I wasn't surprised. I probably wouldn't have called either. All right, I definitely wouldn't have.
The drive could have been awkward and terribly uncomfortable, but Michelle and the others went out of their way to make it the complete opposite. None of them pulled out their laptops, and the conversation stayed away from anything to do with relationships. At times it even became weirdly intense. Like when Tina, our resident science buff, tried to explain black holes and dark matter. Even Greg joined in on the conversation. He spent forty miles trying to convince us that black holes made time travel possible. "Who cares about black holes? All you need is a DeLorean and a flux capacitor," Monica said, making us all burst into laughter.
The hours slid blissfully by with each mile that passed. Through it all, though, the ache in my heart never decreased. It was there as a constant reminder of the phone in my purse that still hadn't rung. I'm not sure I could ever remember a time when I had been so brokenhearted. Not when I tried to hand over my V-card to Alec or when he freaked out after I told him I loved him. This was a different pain. The kind that persisted and refused to go away. I'd written about tons of breakups during the years, but for the first time I actually felt like I understood loss.
Time continued ticking by without a call from Alec. I forced myself to survive the only way I knew how. Ignoring my feelings and stuffing them down. I immersed myself in the attention my friends offered. The distraction provided much-needed relief. It was only when I felt the vehicle begin to slow down that I allowed myself to take in my surroundings.
It took me a minute after seeing the street lights in the shape of big old chocolate Kisses that I fully registered where we were. "Are we in Hershey, Pennsylvania?" I asked, gawking out the window.
"Surprise!" Michelle, Tina, and Monica shouted in unison.
"We're a little ahead of schedule since the last signing was cancelled. Philadelphia is less than a couple hours away, and they're not expecting us until this evening. The way we figure it, you have about two hours to explore," Tina crowed happily.
"You guys," I said as my eyes watered up. Unlike the hundreds of tears I had spilled during the last forty-eight hours, these were not soaked in pain. My friends could have judged me. They could have made me feel worse for what happened, but instead they planned a special day.
Hershey's Chocolate World was everything I ever imagined it would be. The smells alone convinced me this was the closest you would ever get to heaven on earth. By the time I was dragged from the building, I was practically in a chocolate-induced coma. My arms were loaded with bags stuffed with chocolate goodies, a giant Hershey bar stuffed toy, and other knickknacks I felt I couldn't live without. Michelle had to stage an intervention when I tried to buy a ten-pound bar with my name printed on it. The experience was enough to take my mind off Alec, if only momentarily.
"Are you sure you bought enough? I mean, considering they don't sell Hershey bars anywhere else," Monica teased as we climbed back into the RV.
I hefted my bags onto the couch, flexing my sore fingers to get the blood circulating again. "True, but these are fresh from the source," I said, lovingly patting the bags.
"You're incorrigible," she laughed, placing her own purchases behind her chair.
"Says the woman who popped ten Kisses without skipping a beat."
"Can I help it that they were so insistent with the samples? You saw that overly cheerful employee. She practically shoved them in my mouth for me. What was I going to do, get her fired?"
"I was teasing. I ate my fair share too. Needless to say my stomach isn't very happy with me, but it hurts so good," I said, rubbing my rumbling tummy.
I plopped down on the small sofa, tapping my fingers on the armrest as I glanced at my purse next to me. I never heard my phone's ringtone, so as far as I knew Alec hadn't called. Of course, I also resisted the urge to check my phone the entire time we walked around Hershey. Not that the uncertainty wasn't killing me. So many questions bounced around my head. Would I ever hear from Alec again? Would I get home to find my apartment stripped of his belongings?
Regardless of what Alec may or may not be doing, I couldn't let it drag me down to the point where I wouldn't be able to function. I shoved my purse to the opposite side of the sofa and leaned back as the RV began to move. Everyone seemed to be pooped and content to sit and relax for the two-hour drive to Philadelphia. Greg tuned the radio to a top-forty station and the girls and I sat in silence, readying ourselves for a busy evening.
Resting my head against the soft cushions, I contemplated everything that had happened during the past month or so. It already felt like so long ago that I landed in New York, both eager and frightened for what lie ahead. I had released Wicked Lonely, appeared on Good Morning America, survived the Love Bus, and met tons of adoring readers. Not to mention, leaving my boyfriend, being surprised by my boyfriend, believing the worst about my boyfriend, cheatin
g on my boyfriend, and now possibly, I had lost my boyfriend. Without a doubt, I had experienced enough emotional ups and downs to last ten lifetimes.
By tomorrow evening, the bus tour part of my trip would be over. Even though not everything about the Love Bus had worked out like I anticipated, I would miss my friends. We had become as close as anyone could get while spending nearly a month cooped up together. That being said, I was ready for the tour to be over. The countless signings were fun, but mentally draining. Plus, it was difficult being away from home for so long. I was jealous that the others would be heading off to the comfort of their own beds while I still had a few more weeks on the road. My only consolation was that the remaining events were spread out, giving me a break in between, and Mom would be with me for ten days of the trip.
We arrived in Philadelphia with just enough time to check into the hotel and change before we had to head out to a dinner party set up by the publisher. It was a VIP ticketed event, which basically meant the readers would get an opportunity to chat with us on a smaller scale. They could get their books signed without worrying about a line or feeling rushed. Out of all the stops on the tour, this was the event I had been looking forward to the most.
I stood in front of the door-length mirror in my hotel room, lethargically going through the motions of changing into something more appropriate for the dinner. My body had about as much substance as a puppet with no strings. I felt like I just wanted to flop on my bed and sleep for an entire day.
Greg was leaving his own room as I closed my door behind me.
"Hey," he greeted me. "How you holding up?"
"Fine," I lied, pasting a smile on my face.
He slung an arm over my shoulder, pulling me in for a one-armed hug. "Liar. You forget, I have four sisters. I can read chicks. I'm sure Alec is going to realize that mistakes happen and get over it."
My shoulders slumped. "No, he won't. Not only did I cheat on him, but I did it for all the wrong reasons. If I were in his shoes, I don't know that I would ever be able to trust me again. At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if I didn't hear from him—ever." Saying the words aloud made my heart drop to my toes.
"He'd be a fool if he let you go that easily. We're young. We make mistakes."
"That's a cop-out. We're adults and we should know the difference between right and wrong. If we don't, we shouldn't be in a relationship."
"Whoa. That's harsh. I'm just saying I don't think you should give up hope yet."
I shrugged. Maybe my words were harsh, but definitely realistic.
He gave me another squeeze before dropping his arm and guiding me toward the elevators. "I don't know about you, but I'm ready for some food. I went overboard on the freaking chocolate. What I wouldn't do for a pan of my mom's lasagna right about now," he groaned, rubbing his stomach.
I smiled meekly. I appreciated the fact that he was trying to change the subject, but I was in no mood for idle chitchat. I wanted so badly to be able to forget that Alec still hadn't called, but the truth was, the longer I went without hearing from him, the more it hurt. My mood would change by the time we arrived at the dinner. I would make sure of that. No one who spent time and money to meet me deserved anything less.
"So what are you going to do with your free time until your flight leaves on Thursday?" he asked while we waited for the elevator to arrive.
"Write, write, and write some more. I'm terribly behind schedule. The plan is to crank out at least fifteen thousand words in the next three days. I'd love to hit twenty thousand, but I'll have to get into a serious groove to accomplish that. I bet you'll be happy to be home."
He shot me a devilish grin. "Now that hooking up with you is out of the question, I need to get back out there and fix my bruised ego."
"Aw, poor thing. How will you ever cope?" I teased, stepping onto the elevator.
Greg walked in behind me, clicking the button for the lobby. "I won't lie. You left a chink in the armor. I think I'll hit some clubs with my friends and find a couple chicken heads to build up some momentum."
"Chicken heads?"
"Ha. You may think even less of me if I tell you what it means."
I quirked an eyebrow at him. "Great. Well, now I'm not sure I want to know, but go ahead. Let's have it," I said, waving my hand.
"Chicken heads are chicks at clubs who are eager for attention."
"Oh, okay, so what girl at a club isn't?" I thought maybe he was about to tell me something outrageous, like they were prostitutes or something. They sounded like typical girls at a club to me.
"Well, there is a little more," he said, smiling. "Chicken heads tend to be more than willing to perform certain acts—acts that guys really like but not all chicks do, if you get my meaning?"
I got the meaning loud and clear, especially after he bobbed his head up and down for emphasis. "Oh my god. Could you be any more of a pig?"
"I told you it might make you think less of me," he said, chuckling.
Guys were such trolls, but I couldn't help laughing with him. We reached the lobby and the doors opened, revealing a group of people waiting to go up.
"Nicole." My name was called from off to the side as Greg and I stepped off the elevator. The laughter died in my throat. "Alec," I whispered.
The air left my lungs in a whoosh as I watched his eyes narrow, taking in the scene before him. It was irony at its finest. For the past forty-eight hours I'd barely been able to crack a smile, let alone a laugh, but the moment I finally lighten up for the briefest of seconds, he was suddenly there.
"Oh shit," Greg said, taking a punch across the jaw before he could protect himself. He flew backward against the wall, landing in a heap.
Chapter 18
"Alec, what the hell!" I ran to Greg's side and knelt down to make sure he was okay. Blood trickled from the corner of his already slightly swollen lip. "God, are you okay?" I asked, searching my purse for a tissue.
"It's cool. I probably deserved that," he said, rubbing the side of his jaw where Alec had hit him. I grabbed him by the arm and attempted to help him to his feet.
I turned my attention back to Alec who stood behind me with his hand still clenched into a fist. "Why the hell would you do that?" He looked at me incredulously, like he expected me to congratulate him for defending my honor or something. "Say something!"
Two men wearing sport jackets with security badges arrived, looking like they had sprung into action to get there. "What happened? Is anyone hurt here?" Their eyes scanned over Greg and Alec before turning to me, demanding an answer.
"It's cool," Greg said, straightening himself up off the wall. "I'm sorry. We were screwing around and I accidently tripped and fell. It's all good."
One of the guards looked at him skeptically. "You fell?"
"How'd you cut your lip?" The other guard asked, glancing at Alec, who looked as guilty as a child being caught with his hand in the cookie jar.
"Face plant," Greg said, slapping his hands together.
"Face plant, huh? Is anybody else hurt?" The guard looked at me for confirmation and all I could do was shake my head. "We're going to need all your statements and an accident report filled out."
"Sir," Greg said, trying to talk through his busted lip. "I understand completely and we will absolutely cooperate, but this is N.S. Blake. She's a big-time author and due for an appearance right now. Can we fill out the paperwork when we return?"
The guard shook his head. "I'm not sure about that. I appreciate you needing to go, but I have the best interests of the hotel to consider."
"I'm not going to the event. How about I give you my statement and then you get theirs when they get back?" Alec said, stepping forward.
"Are you a guest at the hotel?"
"Yes. He's with me," I answered immediately.
Reluctantly, the guards agreed after Greg provided our identification and the information about the dinner we were due to attend.
"Here," I said, handing my key card to Alec and telling him th
e room number. "I need to get out of here for this dinner. Don't even think of leaving before I get back." I glared at him, my emotions stuck somewhere between happiness to see him and downright aggravation.
He accepted the card without a word and walked with the guards to file an accident report as promised. I stood there like a statue, wishing he would look back at me. Give me some kind of sign that he wasn't here to officially end things. It seemed unlikely that he would travel all the way to Philadelphia to dump me, but I also hadn't expected him to be there to attack Greg either.
After a quick stop in the restroom to wash his lip, Greg and I hustled to the RV and danced around questions from Michelle, Tina, and Monica as to why we were late. As for his lip, Greg made up another ridiculous story of accidently hitting himself with the hotel room door. We all had a laugh at his expense as we drove to the dinner.
Knowing Alec was in my hotel room waiting set me on edge throughout the event. My nerves were jittery and it showed, at least to me. I noticed my hand shaking while reaching for my water glass, and God only knows how many times I dropped my fork during the meal. Through it all I remained my chipper self as I answered questions about book boyfriends and my favorite foods to eat while writing. I made several readers happy by disclosing a few teasers about the next book in the Wicked series. Mostly everyone wanted me to sign their books and pose for pictures, which I gladly did without ever letting my smile slip.
The evening finally came to a close after the last of the attendees staggered out. Only when I was once again on the Love Bus, cloaked in the darkness of night, did I allow my stress to show. During the ride back to the hotel, I told the others that Alec had showed up and was waiting in my room. Greg and I left out the details of the punch he had taken, but I could tell by the look on Michelle's face that she suspected something.
When we arrived at the hotel, we stopped in the lobby to say our goodbyes. Greg would be dropping the three of them off at the airport early the next morning before driving the RV back to New York.