I take long, deep breaths, trying to gain control of all my senses, and my body. That animalistic desire of being with Jorgen returns again, rocking through me like a fire storm.
"Astri, this isn't the end. Your desire is only going to get stronger," he says, and then touches my cheeks. His touch is still burning me, and I no longer care about my own feelings. Jorgen’s sending soaking heat back into my pores, pooling into my core, drenching me again.
"Let's not talk, talking is boring," I say and then roll myself right on top of him again, naked and ready. My nipples are hard and I bring his hand to my chest, urging him to touch me again, devour my body like he did moments ago. There’s no pain, no discomfort or maybe the infuriating need of being close isn't allowing me to feel it.
I take the lead, and it doesn't matter that I have no idea what I'm doing. We’re exploring each other in the most intimate way, taking pleasure and easing the tension, as our energy becomes one bound entity. The warmth that surrounds me is welcome and comforting. I feel his energy pushing through his fingertips, diving into my system. It feels strong and disturbing at the same time.
I'm slowly losing track of time, maybe minutes or hours later, I recall that Jorgen told me that he needed a time out. I beg him not to leave me, not to break the connection, but his eyes are bloodshot. His fingers keep rubbing my naked flesh and his voice is low and steady while he’s talking to me.
Suddenly, we’re kissing again, and making love–until I come again, drenched with sweat, moaning and screaming for more. Slowly, I'm becoming detached from reality, lost in the colourful waves of light, and buzzing sensations travelling over my skin.
Eventually, I start coming around, realising what’s happening, aware that my body’s numb and drenched with sweat. The anger and frustration passes and at some point, I must drift away. Then darkness consumes me and Ruscal's deep voice returns. He’s going to keep hunting me until I die.
I can hear my heartbeat and it’s the only sound inside my head. I don't know if this is a good or bad sign. For some reason, I can't seem to open my eyes; my lids are stuck together. On top of that, there’s something really wrong with my lady parts or maybe I'm still dreaming. Suddenly, everything down there’s burning and feels extremely sore. I swallow hard, and touch my head, it feels hot and I might even have a fever. My hair’s stuck to my face, and I'm naked. Yep, it takes me just a moment to realise that I'm not wearing anything at all.
Slowly, I open my eyes, feeling like last night I must have drank several gallons of wine. Even my shoulders are aching, and nausea rolls through my stomach, then a warm hand moves over my stomach, but it's not my hand.
I slowly turn my head, noticing Jorgen. He’s still fast asleep, embracing me. My chest heaves with desire, and I keep breathing, trying to figure out what the hell happened last night. I keep having flashes of my old vision, when I finally recognised Ruscal as my parents’ killer.
I take a deep breath, trying to remember what happened after me and Jorgen came back to the cottage. And yet, everything seems blurry. The passion and heat was unbearable. No, impossible …. did we?
I throw the covers away and try to get off the bed, but my body’s aching badly, and I'm so sore everywhere. On top of that, I need to pee. The sex, how could I not remember the sex, maybe it was just bad so I don't want to recall it.
"Astri, where are you going?"
My heart stops and I freeze, not knowing what to do. My skin prickles with his awareness, and heat envelops my cheeks, but this time it's not controllable in any way.
I quickly turn around, trying to cover myself. It's stupid, because he’s most likely seen everything already.
"Hi Jorgen," I blurt out. "What happened last night? I don't remember anything."
This is mortifying, and definitely not the way I imagined. Jorgen doesn't look too good either. He has dark circles under his eyes and deep bruises all over his chest. There are some bite marks too, and I feel so ashamed. I must have lost control, but how and why?
"Yes, that's normal. Everything happened so quickly. We came back to the cottage and you were ready to mate. The heat and desire, I smelled it on you. It was one of the most adventurous nights of my life," Jorgen states, sounding hoarse and tired. "You were in the zone, Astri. Some female shifters can recall bits and pieces from their night in heat, but mostly you won't remember anything."
I hide my face in my hands, feeling ashamed of myself. We were supposed to go slow, and yet I lost control. My heart’s pounding loudly in my chest and I don't know how to behave around him. I can't believe I turned into a sex starved animal and now I can't even recall how it felt.
"For Hommis, I must have gone crazy, you look terrible," I say, pointing at all the marks on his chest and arms. And my lady parts are aching badly, but staring at naked Jorgen lying next to me, instantly raises my blood pressure.
He sits up and smiles, brushing his fingers through his hair.
"Don't worry about me. You were wild, sexy and perfect. I couldn't have asked for a better mate," he tells me and the butterflies in my stomach are suddenly alive, and bouncing around in my stomach. A rush of heat is making my eyes heavy and sleepy again. "But this won’t be over in only one night. Female shifters normally take longer to go through heat season, I would expect at least two more days."
"So this isn't over yet?" I ask horrified. This whole thing couldn't have happened at the worst possible time. We were supposed to be back in Rivenna, in the castle and then I would have time to arrange everything.
I have a feeling that last night was just the beginning of what’s about to happen. And I'm completely terrified of being the other Astri. I hang my head…
Chapter Twenty
The promise.
Jorgen probably notices the terrified expression on my face, because he quickly says:
"Hopefully one night for you was enough. I don't smell your enticing scent like I did yesterday. If that’s the case, then we’re in luck, not that I haven't enjoyed it, but all night love making can be quite draining. You were all over me and you kept me up most of the night."
I go instantly red, not believing that I can’t recall anything from that night, not even one single detail. Jorgen keeps looking at me with heat in his eyes, and a wave of heat starts tingling the surface of my skin.
"It's a real shame that I can't remember anything. It was my first time and I can't even recall if it was enjoyable or not," I mumble, not believing that this actually happened.
Jorgen pulls me into his arms, and kisses me deeply. I'm melting, and for a change, I'm still in complete control when he start caressing my back with his fingers. A cold shiver moves down my back, and I’m quite proud of myself that I kept him up all night. He wouldn't have said so if he hadn't enjoyed being with me. According to Alex, some couples don't leave the bedroom for at least three days. I can't imagine that, even if I don’t remember anything afterwards. Besides, we need to head back to Rivenna, Jetli’s waiting for me.
The druid’s cottage is a perfect place, and the setting is truly romantic. I would love to be stuck in here with Jorgen for a bit longer, but right now it isn't possible. The situation in Rivenna is concerning and it worries me that Emilia didn’t respond yesterday.
"This can be easily fixed, Astri. I might be tired, but I certainly won't be able to stay away from you," he whispers, and grabs my face and starts kissing me intensely. The sudden burning heat in the pit of my stomach reminds me that my lady parts are definitely out of commission. I kiss him back anyway, trying to enjoy this moment, sliding on top of him. Seconds later, a painful moan escapes me and Jorgen jerks away, staring at me with a deep frown.
"You must be sore, Astri. We should take it easy," he says and I want to bury myself under the snow.
"I am, but you don't have to worry about it," I admit, still a little pissed off that I can't remember anything from my awesome night with Jorgen. I have so many questions, but right now we should be heading to see Zain. We still need to ta
lk to him about the venom.
"You need to rest for a bit to recover your energy. Come on, lie beside me," Jorgen says, and I'm glad that he’s so understanding. I don't think that I could have sex with him right now.
We both lay down, and then he embraces me with his arms while my heart pounds steadily in my chest. Jorgen makes me feel secure and I'm already imaging my life with him.
Moments later, I shut my eyes and drift away instantly, exhausted, but maybe for the first time in my life, satisfied.
Later on, I wake up a bit more refreshed, take a shower and grab whatever clothes are on the floor and quickly put them on. My head’s filled with flashbacks from the time when he kissed me in his chamber. When I turn around, I catch Jorgen staring at me and heat rushes to my check.
Really? I have to get a grip and stop pretending that I haven't spent the entire night with him making love to me, and acting like I've gone crazy.
"You're beautiful Astri, and as soon as we get back to Riveanna, we should announce to the people that we’re mates. Hopefully, by that time, I’ll be a mage again," Jorgen says, and soaring guilt starts filling my gut.
After he steals a few kisses from me, we have a quick breakfast and talk about our strategy. The snow’s melted a little and it seems warmer today than it was yesterday. The female dragon roars loudly and I see two of them in the sky, circulating around the mountain. We’re still wearing our furry jackets when we head over to see Zain. He’s in the cave, tending to Kami who looks a little better. It seems like his wounds are healing nicely, and Zain's paste must be made with rare healing herbs. He roars when he spots us, lifting his giant mouth and sniffing around us, like he’s trying to indicate that we’re welcome to stay. I don't dare move for longer than a few seconds, and I know that Kami isn’t going to hurt me. Slowly, and without making any sudden movements, I run my hand over the edge of his neck, staring directly into his golden eyes. It's nerve wracking, and yet the most amazing experience of my life. I’m most likely never going to have this kind of opportunity again, unless I come back to visit Zain.
"He does respect you, Astri," the druid says, and I feel proud of myself. I chose to save him after I nearly killed him.
Jorgen and I enjoyed our time with Zain, but it's time to get back to the real world. We can no longer delay the conversation about the venom. We need it for Jetli and now I'm over the heat season, nothing’s stopping us on our way home to Rivenna. Maybe Jorgen was right, and one long night with him was enough for me. Now, I can concentrate on what's important.
"Yes, Astri's energy is magnetic and the dragon can sense it," Jorgen adds when I walk up to the druid, thinking about the best possible way to approach the topic. He most likely suspects that we arrived in the valley because we need something from him.
"Zain, can we speak with you about something. We both appreciate the way you welcomed us in the valley, but there’s a specific reason why we’re here," I start, staring at him and crossing my fingers behind me, hoping that he’ll help us.
"Let's walk," he suggests and shortly after that we leave the cave. The bright sun’s shining over the valley, and the snow’s shimmering like a million tiny crystals.
"One of the shifters in our hometown told me about you, about the fact that you bread dragons," I continue, walking close to him. Jorgen’s right behind me and I know that he’s listening to every word. "When I was younger, I adopted two Pixies, but one of them has been severely injured, and the healer believes that she might not survive. Jorgen is the Duke of Rivenna and we both wanted to ask if we could buy dragon venom from you in order to heal my beloved Pixie."
My voice vibrates a little, but the tense silence spreads between us for a little while. Zain keeps stroking his beard, like he’s thinking about what I said. I have no idea if I should say anymore, and I can see Jorgen clenching his fists, waiting for Zain's response.
"Many people desire the dragon venom. Shifters are aware that the venom can heal many diseases and reverse spells," Zain finally says. "This is the reason that you tried to enter the valley, because you knew that I would have it. Many other shifters have been killed, trying to cross over and I'm aware that I can't allow humans or shifters anywhere near my beasts, otherwise their existence might be a stake."
It's an answer, but not the one that I was looking for.
"I’ve lost my inner dragon and its part of me, part of my personality. I can't imagine living without it. A couple of months back, I was forced to go through the cutting of mage ritual in the Decaying Mountains. The leader of the wild shifters took away my magic, my ability to shift. This is my only chance to reverse it … and you're our only hope. Please help us," Jorgen says, approaching the old man, with a desperate look on his face. I suspect that Zain will want something in return, something that may not be necessarily valuable. Mages have been making trades with each other for a long time now, and I need to remember that the druid is still only human.
"You're suffering and I can see that Jorgen, but the venom might not bring your dragon back," Zain says and instantly blood rushes to my ears. No, no, not this can't be true. Venom can reverse any magical spell and I believe that it might even get rid of my scar.
Jorgen looks devastated, but he keeps shaking his head like he doesn't want to believe Zain.
"No, this isn't right. Dragon venom is a natural remedy. I've heard stories about it, and listened to people who were supposed to be dead, but they survived when they were given the venom," he says, and I wish that I’d already told him the truth about my involvement in Bratlav’s ritual.
"Let me speak to Astri for a brief moment. I hope you don't mind," Zain says and Jorgen nods.
It's a confusing request, but right now he has no idea what else to do. I have a better chance to convince him to give us the venom. I don't believe that he’s looking to make any sort of deal with us. He hasn't refused to help us, but he hasn't been clear about his intentions yet. I watch as Jorgen walks away, heading towards the dragons.
"Do you have the venom?" I ask.
"Yes, it drips from their skin when they get hurt or reach their adult age. The liquid is only valuable for a few weeks. I have a few flasks in my storage."
"You're wrong about the venom. I know that the liquid can bring Jorgen's dragon back. It can reverse the ritual, and save my Pixie. You're a good man Zain, but we have to go back. There must be something that you want in exchange for the venom," I say, aware that my voice is high-pitched now, almost desperate.
“Yes, the venom can help him, but it won't simply bring his magic back. Jorgen will need to drink it in the exact same place where he lost his beast, where the ritual happened. I can gift him the venom, but he needs to return to Rivenna, to the Decaying Mountains. That's how the magic works. I'm only human, but I have been studying it for a long time, even before I became a dragon breeder," he says, and I stare at him, not knowing what to say.
This makes sense, the man must have been interested in magic when he was younger. I’ve seen his collection of books.
"That's impossible, the venom should reverse the magic that was performed on him," I disagree.
"The cutting of the mage ritual was performed on another land. He will get his beast back, only if he returns to the same place–"
"The Decaying Mountains," I cut him off, rubbing my scar. It doesn’t matter, the venom is for Jetli and Jorgen. If there is any liquid left, maybe I can attempt to fix my face, but the scar was created by my own fire.
"Yes, Jorgen needs to want to become himself on his land. Then he will truly be a mage again," Zain finishes for me and my heart start pounding louder in my chest. "But you're right, I do want something in return. You showed tremendous bravery when you saved Kami and I'm grateful for that. There’s a reason why I live alone, in isolation, trying to protect the last real dragons on earth."
This is it, Zain’s going to tell me what he wants. Maybe Emilia's magical mirror? It’s truly a good object and it could be useful for him.
"Wha
t is it that you require from us?" I ask, swallowing hard.
"Your passion, I would like part of your Wyvern's passion and we will have a deal," Zain says, smiling at me and I have no idea how to react.
"My passion?" I ask, laughing. "I don't understand, how could you get my passion? I was thinking more about magical objects that you may find useful."
"Magic isn't something that I'm interested in, but your passion can heal the dragons. It's hidden inside your soul, and you can give me part of yourself."
I stare at him a little baffled, not knowing if this is some kind of trick. Passion isn't something that I expected to trade for venom. Maybe he’s trying to strip away my emotions after I've gone through heat.
"How am I going to give you part of my passion?" I ask, fearing that I won't be the same Astri when I return to Rivenna. Jorgen’s looking at me now, I don't have to lift my head. I can sense him, trying to read my lips from the distance. He won't be happy about the trade, but I'm willing to do anything in order for him to get his dragon back.
"The promise is going to be enough. You have already made a connection with Kami, and he will be the one that takes part of you," Zain explains. "But then, only the truth will repair the missing part inside your soul."
"The truth?"
"Yes, the truth that you meant to share with Jorgen a while back, the truth about losing his magic and beast. You were inactive when he needed you the most. You're afraid that he will blame you for his condition, for the fact that he doesn't have his dragon and magic."
My heart keeps thumping loudly in my chest while everything’s slowly beginning to make sense.
"My passion won't be affected as long as I tell Jorgen the truth?" I ask, swallowing hard and feeling a little sick. I shouldn't even be surprised that the druid knows about that night in the mountains. He may be magical after all or he’s able to read my mind. Either way, I can't back away from the promise that I made to myself. "And what is my passion, what exactly am I losing?"