‘Before we moved house,’ she said, ‘whenever my friends came round, you’d always hang out for a bit and talk to us. If we ever saw you in town, you’d wave or come over and chat, like you were genuinely interested. No one else’s brother ever bothered. I’ve always been proud of you for that.’
He smiled up at her. ‘You say the sweetest things.’
‘Well, you do the sweetest things. You made that speech at my sixteenth birthday saying how I was the best sister in the world, remember? And when I did that stupid leaving concert at school, you clapped loudest even though I was total rubbish and forgot all my words.’
Tom laughed as she reminded him of these things. It was great. Everything pulled together. He told the story of the summer they’d gone camping in southern France and the site was dull, dull, dull. The swimming pool was shut and the entertainment was rubbish and the only good things were the pâtisserie and the kites they’d bought from the shop.
‘We found that hill,’ he said, ‘you know the one? We flew the kites from the top and when we got bored we rolled all the way down and ran back up again.’
Ellie was amazed he remembered. She could have cut his hair for hours then. She loved how cosy it was together in the spare room, how she could hear the vague sounds of people setting up the party, their voices low and far away. It gave her courage. ‘Can we talk about what happened that night?’
He swung round on the chair to look at her. ‘Really? Can’t I just have a break?’
Ellie lowered her eyes. ‘There are things I don’t understand.’
He frowned at her. ‘Have you been talking to anyone?’
‘Not really.’ Ellie had a drifting sensation, as if this conversation was surrounded by smoke. ‘I haven’t been back to school yet.’
There was silence as they looked at each other. ‘If I go down, Ellie, it’ll be the end of everything for me.’
‘I know.’
‘There are guys in there …’ His voice trailed off and he shook his head as if he’d seen the most unspeakable things. ‘It was the longest two weeks of my life.’
There was something in his eyes. Their dark shine reminded her of the autumn he broke his arm, how he sat on the football field and howled with fury, because he had to miss the whole season and he’d only just made the team. She looked away.
‘There,’ she said. ‘I’ve finished.’ She stroked her hands over his hair, smoothing flyaway strands. ‘It’s cute.’
‘Cute?’ He rubbed his own hand over his head. ‘That wasn’t quite what I had in mind.’
‘What did you want to look like?’
‘Innocent.’ He smiled at her in the mirror. ‘Inoffensive and above suspicion.’
She sat on his bed and watched him dust the hair from his shoulders with his T-shirt. He sprayed deodorant under his arms, splashed aftershave onto his hands, rubbed them together then smoothed his palms across his face.
‘Will I have to go to court and answer questions?’ she asked. ‘Or will they just read out my statement?’
He ignored her, pulled on his new stripy T-shirt. She’d chosen it for him with Mum last week and it still had the label on. He ripped it off and passed it to her. ‘Recycling,’ he said.
She put it in her pocket. ‘Did you hear me?’
He fiddled with his shirt, straightening it in the mirror. ‘You were the only other person here the whole time, which makes you the primary witness. You’ll definitely have to go to court.’
Her stomach gripped. ‘They can’t make me say anything.’
‘They can’t make you say anything if you didn’t see anything.’
She nodded. She felt a mixture of pity and fear as she looked at him, because the thought of what she should or shouldn’t say made her feel scared. She’d been worrying about it for two weeks. It had been so bad one day that she’d fantasized that a nuclear bomb had gone off and she was the only person left alive. In the fantasy, she’d wandered about opening and closing doors, stirring up dust, picking things up and putting them down. It had been so peaceful.
She gnawed at her lip again. ‘When the police interviewed me, I told them I went straight upstairs to bed when you brought everyone back.’
‘Well, that’s fine then.’
She blushed at the memory of scrambling up from the sofa in her slippers and pyjamas. Karyn and her mate Stacey glittered, surrounded by boys, fresh from the pub. They smiled down at her, told her she should stay and talk to them. But she knew by the look on her brother’s face that he wanted her safe upstairs, and she felt such an idiot making an excuse about having a headache.
‘The other thing I told them,’ Ellie said, ‘was I looked out of my window later and saw everyone outside.’
Tom turned from the mirror and blinked at her. ‘I didn’t know that.’
‘I just said everyone looked like they were having a good time and you and Karyn had your arms round each other.’
‘What did you say that for?’
‘Because the police need to know she fancied you. Was that wrong?’
‘It’s OK,’ he said. ‘There’s no need to get upset. It’s me they’re going to grill, not you.’
‘She was flirting with you all night though.’ Ellie curled her fists tight and pinched her thumbnails into her palms. ‘I bet when you went into the bedroom to get the sleeping bag, she just pulled you down on top of her, didn’t she?’
Tom winced. ‘It’s not something I’m proud of, Ellie, but yeah, that’s pretty much what happened.’
She nodded. ‘I thought so.’
He pushed the chair back under the desk. ‘You reckon we can stop talking about this now? A sad little shag with a crazy girl is a bit humiliating to discuss with my sister. Maybe we should go downstairs and see if they need any help.’
He wrapped the newspaper into a parcel and put it in the bin. Ellie picked up the handful of hair from the corner and did the same. She was an idiot. It was horrible for him to be reminded of that night when he was supposed to be feeling safe with his family.
‘Are you going to dress up?’ he said. ‘Team Parker and all that? Best foot forward.’
He was trying to make her laugh. This was how their father would speak.
‘All hands on deck,’ she said, because she wanted to give him something back.
He patted her quickly on the head. ‘Don’t forget.’
Another expression from their father. Don’t forget who you are.
Don’t forget whose side you’re on.
Six
They parked the car by the river and walked up the lane to the house, Jacko still feeding Mikey last-minute bits of information from Tom Parker’s Facebook page. Jacko had checked it out on the computer at work and now they both knew the bastard liked golf and sleeping and that all the friends on his page were girls.
‘His favourite celebrity’s Vin Diesel,’ Jacko said, ‘though I don’t think we need to let that worry us, because he also likes Where’s Wally?’ He snapped his fingers, laughing. ‘We’re gonna take him easy!’
But at the gate, even Jacko was silenced. They stood openmouthed, taking it in. The house was lit up like Christmas, with fairy lights strung in the trees and torches with real flames staked along the path.
Jacko whistled. ‘Man, they’ve gone to town!’
‘They’ve got no shame. I told you.’
The place seemed even bigger than before. There must be at least five bedrooms and the lawn wrapped itself round the whole house. There were flowers that showed up their colours even in the dark, like flowers from a shop stuck in the earth. The windows seemed bigger too, all glaring with light. They obviously didn’t worry about heating bills, could just chuck cash away, probably had radiators at full blast and doors open and everything on standby all night long. There was a confidence to it that Mikey admired and hated at the same time – how come some people had so much? How come some kids got this for free?
‘You think they’ll suss we don’t belong?’ he said.<
br />
Jacko screwed up his forehead and looked offended. ‘We belong everywhere.’
‘What about the scratched-up Jag? You think they’ll know it was me?’
‘Nah, plenty of people hate the guy. Just keep the spanner out of sight.’ Jacko drew in a last chestful of smoke before chucking his fag on the gravel. ‘Right, remember what we said? First one to see him sends the other a text, then we reconvene for phase two.’
Mikey checked his mobile. He supposed it was some kind of plan.
Jacko went first, straight through the front door and inside like he knew the place. Mikey made his way round the side, following a trickle of guests just arriving. Round the back of the house, the garden opened up. It felt different from the front, almost tropical, with heaters belching out hot air and the grass still wet from the rain.
There were masses of people – adults as well as kids standing in groups on the lawn, others sitting at tables in a marquee with drinks and plates of food. Mikey was stunned by the effort that had gone into this.
He grabbed a beer from a woman with a tray and knocked half of it back. He wondered if anyone from school would recognize him. It’d been two years since he left and these kids were the ones who went on to college, so it was unlikely. He took another gulp of beer and tried to concentrate. Find Tom Parker, that was the plan. Tell Jacko when he had.
There was a group of boys sitting at one of the tables, there were more queuing for food, another group swigging beer over by the fence. They all had that posh look Mikey was expecting to find, but none matched the pixellated photo Jacko had shown him in the car.
He walked round the garden once, a whole circuit. Music pumped out from speakers, the leaves on the trees shivered, the grass thumped under his feet. He hated all these people in their smart clothes, with their wine and champagne. He thought of his sisters at home – Holly drawing crazy pictures with colours like mud and grey. Karyn trying to make dinner with no food in the house. Mum asleep. These people didn’t care about his family at all. They were here to support Tom Parker. In fact, they were probably laughing at Karyn. Whispering about her, nudging each other. It was unforgivable.
A girl wobbled by on very high heels. She was drunk, he could see that.
‘Hey,’ he said, ‘I’m looking for Tom Parker. You know him?’
She stopped and smiled. Her eyes were dark and drawn round the edge in blue. ‘Who are you?’
He couldn’t stumble at the first hurdle. ‘Joe.’ He had to be someone other than himself and he knew he’d never see her again.
‘You’re very good-looking.’
‘So, do you know where Tom is?’
She waved her arm in the vague direction of the house. ‘Somewhere. How do you know him?’
‘College.’ Second time today and it was beginning to sound true.
She leaned in to him as if she had a secret. ‘You want to kiss me?’
‘Not really.’
She laughed, puckered her lips and moved in closer. ‘I bet you do.’
He looked about, but no one was taking any notice. He could pick her up and carry her off. He could drag her behind the marquee where it was dark and do whatever he liked to her. He could say she wanted it, that she asked for it.
‘Come on,’ the girl said. ‘Kiss me then.’
Was this how trashed Karyn was that night?
He nudged her off. ‘I don’t want to.’
She looked insulted. ‘Don’t you like me?’
He gave her a peck on the cheek to shut her up. Her skin tasted expensive. He told her he’d see her later, though he’d run if he saw her coming. He waved her off and fumbled for his phone. He couldn’t do this. He shouldn’t be here. This was the stupidest idea he’d ever had.
Just as he was texting him, Jacko appeared. ‘Target located,’ he said.
‘What?’
Jacko nodded at a tall boy loping across the grass towards a group of men. ‘I’ve been tailing him for five minutes. It’s definitely him.’
Tom Parker looked like a tosser – shirt and tie, schoolboy hair, shaking hands with all the adults. Looking at him made Mikey want to puke, made the knot in his gut tighten.
‘Let’s get him.’
But before he could move, Jacko caught him, said, ‘Whoa! That’s not the plan.’
‘Bollocks to the plan!’ Mikey tried to shake him off. ‘Let go of me. I’m sick of this.’
‘You whack him now, you’ll get arrested,’ Jacko hissed. ‘How’s that going to help Karyn?’
Mikey shoved him off. ‘It’s gonna help me!’
A woman walked past and looked curiously at them. ‘Hello,’ she said. ‘Everything all right?’
‘Perfect,’ Jacko said, putting his arm round Mikey and reining him in. ‘We were just saying what a lovely evening for a bail bash.’
The woman moved away, frowning slightly.
Mikey shrugged Jacko off again. ‘I hate this place.’
‘I know, I know.’
‘I hate him too. Look at him – surrounded by suits and still untouchable. He’s getting away with everything!’
Jacko sighed, opened his coat, pulled out a bottle and passed it to Mikey. ‘I also located the drinks cabinet. I think you’ll find this twenty-five-year-old malt whisky will clear your mind.’
Mikey took three long gulps. It flamed in his throat, warmed his belly. It was good to sink inside the feeling that somehow this was all going to work out. He took another gulp, and another.
Jacko smiled. ‘Better?’
Mikey nodded. He was thinking of his mum with her morning Valium. For the first time he understood why she talked about taking the edge off the terror.
‘He’s the centre of attention,’ Jacko said, ‘so we need to stay calm and move on to phase two.’ He winked. ‘You get to do what you’re best at, Mikey, and talk to girls. We need tactical intelligence – does he do martial arts? Is he left or right-handed? Has he got brothers and are they here? The usual stuff. I’ll keep a visual and gather data as I tail him. We both need to suss out the best location for phase three – preferably somewhere dark and quiet with good escape routes.’ He checked his watch. ‘We’ll reconvene on this position in an hour.’
Mikey felt momentarily dizzy. He rubbed his eyes. It would be great to pretend this was an ordinary night, that they’d crashed some random party, that he was here on the pull.
Jacko pressed the whisky bottle on him. ‘Keep this, it’s doing you good. Think of the Vikings, Mikey. Free booze. Posh birds. We’re here to plunder.’
Mikey shook his head as Jacko walked backwards away from him. ‘The Vikings?’
‘Yep. And don’t worry, the face-to-face thing’s gonna happen. We’ll perforate him at the end, when it’s quiet.’ He tapped a finger to his head. ‘Stay frosty.’
Mikey took another swig of whisky and watched the clouds. Soon it would rain again. A downpour would be good – wet people rushing back to cars, the whole party ruined. Tom Parker would be left alone. An easy target.
Mikey scanned the lawn, looking for him, but he’d gone now, the circle of men broken up. There was the drunk girl again, moving slowly along the fence, staring at her own feet. She wouldn’t be any help.
But there – who was that? On the bench, underneath that tree. Lanterns swayed above her, people everywhere, and her simply sitting there, the one still point. Mikey put the whisky in his pocket, plucked two beers from a waitress and smiled. He knew this girl. She’d opened the door to him earlier. She was Tom Parker’s sister.
Seven
When he got to the bench, she looked up, but didn’t smile.
‘Mind if I sit down?’ he said.
She shrugged, as if she didn’t care either way, and slid along to make room. He put the beers on the bench between them. ‘One of these is for you.’
‘No thanks.’ Her voice was softer than he remembered.
He took out his tobacco and rolled a thin one, offered it across. ‘Smoke?’
Sh
e shook her head.
‘So,’ he said, ‘not in a party mood then?’
‘Not particularly.’
‘Missing revision?’
He meant it as a joke, but she didn’t get it. ‘It’s not that, it’s just, I never expected it to be so …’
She let the sentence drop.
A group of girls cheered as some Lady Gaga song suddenly blared from the speakers outside the marquee. They started dancing, singing along to the words and pointing their fingers at the sky. A couple of boys stood watching and one of the girls wiggled her arse at them. Adults stood about on the grass, leaning towards each other in deep conversation. It was like there were two parties happening at once.
‘Your brother knows a lot of people,’ he said.
She sighed. ‘Never underestimate the power of curiosity.’
‘Are any of your friends here?’
‘I didn’t invite anyone.’
‘You invited me.’
‘Apart from you.’
She slid a fraction further away to show her utter lack of interest. He smiled. This would be a breeze.
‘Where’s your boyfriend then? Is he here?’
She frowned. ‘Who?’
‘Just thought you’d be with someone. Looking like you do.’
‘No.’
Mikey inhaled, exhaled. He knew it was up to him to say something else, but most girls would’ve laughed when he mentioned a boyfriend, would’ve been flattered. Now everything that came into his head sounded fake. He sat and smoked and tried to work out what to do next.
It was solved for him – her phone rang and she stood up to fish it out of her pocket. ‘Tom, yeah, I did text you,’ she said. ‘Because I couldn’t see you anywhere, that’s why. This is madness. Do you even know half these people?’ She glanced back at Mikey only briefly before walking off down the slope. When she got to the fence, she opened a gate he hadn’t even known was there and disappeared through it. Now what did he do?