Large tears tickled my eyes, and I fought to keep them from falling. I was sure my face was a blotchy mess. My fair skin always looked horrid when I cried. I would have to wash up soon and crawl into bed before Ephrem came home. I’d rather he never see me like this.
My heart was pounding underneath my breastbone while my ragged breathing choked underneath as I struggled to get through this rage quietly. Rafaela was still in the royal palace, and the last I’d seen of her was her stoic face as Alec held her up before they walked away toward the ArcKnight limo. It was her image on the news when it was announced her husband would take a second mate that broke the dam of tears.
I missed my sister. I couldn’t believe I wasn’t there to comfort her.
She was all I had left. My mother was there, but I’d never been particularly close to her. I was hoping Rafaela had the wits to manipulate things at court, but seeing her pale, shocked face after the recent decision regarding her own future told me I was far from her thoughts right now. Gil was going to have his hands full dealing with her wrath. At least she had the comforts of home to help her through this hard time. Mother was there. Hell, even Alec, who was more family than anything else, would see her through any hardships she would have to deal with.
But I was alone. Save for Ephrem, there was no one in the Outlands who had my back. It was disconcerting.
My head was spinning and filled me with nausea I couldn’t shake. I jumped off the bed and ran to the bathroom to throw up. Flushing down the contents, I washed my face and stared at my pallid reflection in the mirror. Dark bruises under my eyes made me look like I was either anemic or hadn’t slept for weeks. I couldn’t deny that I hadn’t gotten much rest since my banishment, but my body felt worn out like I was fighting off some internal battle and sorely losing. Maybe I was just sick, but I wasn’t one to get ill often.
Blood trickled down out of my nose and dripped into the sink. I reached up to touch my face, feeling the warm blood against my clammy skin. Grabbing a wad of tissue, I held my nose tight to stifle the dripping.
I never got bloody noses. Something felt odd, and my skin was crawling like a thousand ants crept just underneath the surface. There was something tugging at my mind that I couldn’t quite put a finger on. Something had happened that evening that I couldn’t recall. Something was wrong, but what was it?
Squeezing my eyes shut, I made my way to the bed and leaned against the headboard. The entire night was a foggy blur. My memory was so hazy, I wondered if I’d been drinking. Drinking had never been a habit I’d gotten into, but if I had, would it have explained the blackout? I couldn’t be sure, but my head was pounding as I rested my head on the hardwood design of the headboard. I couldn’t lie down yet; I didn’t want to swallow gobs of blood. Instead, I gathered the pillows on the bed and stacked them behind me.
Settling back, I checked my nose. It had stopped bleeding, along with the constant spinning of the room. I hoped it wouldn’t come back. Whatever was ailing me slowly receded after I closed my eyes and sank back into the mountain of pillows. I couldn’t wait to see Ephrem and longed to have his strong muscular arms around me while he whispered words of love. He’d make sure I was okay. If only he’d return.
Grayson. I had to tell Ephrem about Grayson.
No. He’d forbid me to seek him out again. Besides, Grayson wanted something from Ephrem, didn’t he? Well, I needed more information from Grayson first. I groaned in frustration. Something was off about this whole thing, but my current state of confusion wasn’t helping me remember.
Ephrem would do anything for me. I felt it in the core of my body. He would. Wouldn’t he? I hoped so, for there was something I had to ask him. Something he would have to believe for him to follow wherever it was I would take him, whether to the ends of the world or deep into the dangerous places that existed in this lonely place.
Something told me he would follow me anywhere. I was counting on it, but I couldn’t remember why this was so important to me at the moment. I needed sleep. That was it. The endless night had eaten up the last of my energy. Luckily, I didn’t have to work in the morning. There was no way I could handle the bustle of the diner. I would get the rest I needed to do what I had to do.
Whatever it was I had to do …
Chapter Twenty-Five
Rafaela
I pulled the shawl around my shoulders as I stared out over the palace grounds and beyond the massive wall that separated the ArcKnight stronghold from the rest of the city of Temple. It was obscene in size, but necessary to keep us safe. My home was acres wide and took up most of the northern side of the city. The tower I stood in was the tallest point of the palace, and I could see beyond the wall, past the city to where the wall of the MarkTier stronghold began. It ran for miles in both directions, a perfect reflection to ours, and just as intimidating.
Between walls lay the enormous city that could rival the world’s largest. It never failed to amaze me how this vast city held so much power within its boundaries. Beyond the wall, in the Outlands, my sister roamed. I could feel her longing inside, troubling my spirit along with Gil’s betrayal.
Sometimes I thought it might be better on that side of the wall. Lawless, ungoverned but free. Dangerous, chaotic, but never suppressed. As the Alpha’s mate, I was bound to so many rules, customs and laws, it was impossible to understand where I stood in the hierarchy of it all.
Women were considered equal and could rule as Alphas too. It didn’t matter if this situation had been reversed and I had requested a second mate. I probably would’ve been granted one if my mate tested with low fertility. But I would’ve never asked for such a thing. To have done that to me was unforgivable. If Gil did find another mate, it would send a crack down the center of my heart.
Never hold on too tight. Never love more than you are loved. I’d forgotten the things I had told myself and learned from watching others’ hearts break.
How naïve I had been to think I’d be immune to such devastation.
“You called me, m’lady?” Alec’s voice echoed behind me, but I didn’t turn from the scenery.
“Yes. Thanks for coming. I need to ask you something.” I ripped my gaze from the city and turned toward Alec. His dark eyes were fixed on me as he patiently waited. His dark hair had grown some, and I wondered if he was letting it grow longer. Some soldiers kept it long and pulled back at the nape. It was a personal choice. I’d never seen him with longer hair, and it made me realize how little I knew about his personal life.
“Please, sit.” I waved toward a pair of chairs nearby. A tray set with tea and finger sandwiches was waiting on a table where I’d had the servants place it earlier. I rarely sat in my rooms alone with Alec. Most of the time we were in the conference room, and it was always about business.
I was tired of business. I needed to know more about Gil and try to set in motion a plan to change things. Who better to help me than Gil’s right-hand man? I felt guilty asking Alec to help me, but he was the only person I trusted enough to ask the unthinkable questions. He knew more about the workings of the ArcKnight stronghold than Gil did, and if there was a chink in anyone’s armor, Alec was the person to ask about it.
“We never speak informally, in your chambers,” Alec observed as I poured us both some tea and offered him the sandwiches. The curiosity in his face lifted my spirits. It was comforting to know he was interested in what I had to say. It was rare to find that in a man, especially in a pack hierarchy, even when women were considered equal. There were always those opposed to the modernized ways of running things.
“I know. I think it’s refreshing. Don’t you?” I smiled.
He tipped his head in a nod but didn’t touch the tea or sandwiches. “What’s bothering you, Ella?”
“Have you ever heard of an Alpha being stripped of their title?” I leaned back, ready to hear his opinion on the subject.
Moments passed as he studied me. He didn’t look surprised but was eyeing me for information. I didn’t give
him any. Instead, I took the same amount of time to avoid his gaze. I knew if there was someone I couldn’t bullshit, it would be him. He knew me better than my own husband did, and I wouldn’t be able to hide any of my intentions once I looked up. I needed his honest outlook on things, but more than anything, I needed him on my side first.
“Yes.”
My eyes snapped up to meet his and found them twinkling with the excitement contained within.
“And? How was it done?”
He hesitated, not because he was afraid to tell me what he knew, but because he was a cautious man, and each moment told him more about my plans than any words ever could.
“First of all, this isn’t ever to be taken lightly. Second, it’s only been done once before.”
“In the ArcKnight pack?”
He nodded. “I need to know something first, Ella, before I tell you how to do it. I need you to be perfectly honest.”
How easily he made me wait to hear what I wanted to know.
“Of course. What is it?”
“If you decide to do this, there’s no going back. Severing the ties of an Alpha to his pack will be detrimental to all involved. The Alpha is basically demoted to nothing and is left shattered. It’s an unforgivable action, and it leaves the house divided, no matter how delicately it is treated. I need to know that you’re willing to risk it all; your life, your heart, your husband….”
He lowered his eyes to the ground when he said the last part, and I wondered what more he wanted to say.
“And you’ll have to pick a new mate before you even start. Someone who will challenge Gil for you and win.” Now he was looking at me with an intensity I could feel penetrating my soul. It took my breath away.
I let the words percolate in my head for minutes, looking away as I finally exhaled the breath I was holding. I was elated that he was already on my side by willingly offering concern about what I wanted to accomplish. Anyone else would have arrested me for treason, but Alec wasn’t that kind of person, and I was counting on it.
“I understand.” I finally answered.
His breath filled the space between us as he collected his thoughts. I’d never seen Alec nervous, but this was the closest I’d ever gotten to see him fidget. It was amusing, and I wanted to see more of this vulnerable side of him. He, who was so composed and sure of himself, was nervous when it came to speaking about overthrowing his leader and me finding a new mate.
I wondered if he knew who I would pick.
“All right. It’s not going to be easy, but it’s quite possible for you to challenge him for the Alpha position and win. You’ve got the advantage of the popular vote, especially after Gil publically humiliated you.” He paused, checking to see if he’d offended me before continuing. “You definitely have the sympathetic female vote and a ton of people are on your side. You’re their favorite, that much is definite.”
He was back in business mode, and I already missed the vulnerable side. I wanted to see it again. I knew the only way to get it was to surprise him and jolt him out of his comfort zone once more.
“I want you to be my mate.” I waited calmly after I spoke. His lips parted as he swallowed the upcoming words and peered back at me. Speechless, I prayed he would say something soon. Even though I’d wanted to shock him, the silence was nerve wracking.
“I—I, um….” He stumbled on his words. I had caught him completely off guard. Good.
“It’s all or nothing. Are you with me?” I asked softly, closing my eyes. If he rejected my proposal, I didn’t know what I was going to do. He was the only one I had ever considered for the position, and there really was no one else I wanted for a mate. My heart felt like it was going to burst in those eternal moments as it seized in my chest and the air seemed to grow thin. I swore my lungs threatened to shrivel down to nothing.
He couldn’t say no, could he? Had I ever doubted his feelings for me before? Never had I thought of it more than I did now, and the possibility that he could reject our future together after all we’d been through would be worse than Gil’s betrayal. How had it come to this point? How had I married the wrong man and believed with all my soul in the worst choice of mates? I could’ve ended it long ago, even with a betrothal in place. We were free to marry who we wanted if the match wasn’t well paired. I could have done it years ago when I first realized Alec had feelings for me. But I would have never been a royal. Instead, marrying Alec would have made me just a noblewoman.
But I hadn’t, and there I was, with my heart in my hand and ready to take the fall. Now we could challenge Gil for the throne and rule together.
I squeezed my eyes shut. His silence was maddening.
Warm lips pressed to mine, interrupting my thoughts, and the rustle of Alec’s movements as he took me into his arms finally gave way to a rush of breath. The way he kissed me made the world tilt on its axis, and I’d never felt such exhilaration. I kissed him back with every cell of my being, and I never wanted him to let me go.
He was the first to pull away and gaze into my eyes.
“I’ll be your champion. My answer is yes. It was always you, Ella. Always. I never thought I’d be able to tell you, but it’s always been all or nothing for you.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Ephrem
The council’s conference room in the MarkTier palace was stifling. It was a place I did not frequent often. Banishment included exclusion from all political matters unless it had to do with the security and protection of the royal palace. Yet, here I was, facing my brother Etan, with the elders surrounding us. Their suspicious eyes bore down upon us as they observed our discussion from their seats. The table was U-shaped and every one of them had their glares fixed upon us.
Never was I more relieved that it wasn’t my job to appease them and inform them of all matters concerning House MarkTier. Poor Etan. Being the first born brought with it an incredible number of disadvantages. I wasn’t one bit envious of him.
Alderan, one of the council’s youngest but most outspoken members, waved his hands in the air, perturbed. “You’re speculating. The KelHan pack has not been seen around these parts in over a century. They are most likely all dead out in the forests of California or up in Oregon. This is insanity to believe they’ve come back.”
“We’ve presented as witnesses to what we saw. It’s possible they are planning something malicious, but we can’t approach them without backup. The park is on MarkTier territory, but I need permission to engage so as not to break any agreements in place between the packs.” They were trying my patience, but I held my tongue as I waited for their response. It wasn’t a matter of if the pack was back. They were. So what was the issue here?
“Request denied. You will not engage in any kind of contact with these strangers. I am not convinced they are the KelHans. More evidence is needed.”
“And if we are wrong about this, Alderan?” Marianne, one of the oldest women on the council, leaned forward, her face hardened and concerned.
“Marianne, if they dare return, they would suffer grave consequences. Their lives would be forfeited for breaking the terms of their banishment. I’d like to think they wouldn’t risk such a thing.”
“But what of the slim chance they do risk it?” Jason asked. “What if they no longer have anything to lose?” He was standing next to me, and it looked like he was grinding his teeth down to nubs as he listened to the council.
“And what do they have to gain?” Alderan asked. “It’s all speculation. If they do return, then so help us all. They are demonic and cursed. They were in their infancy when banished from our lands. The extent of their powers is unknown. It wouldn’t be a pleasant reunion, to say the least.”
“Then we can’t risk not taking action now,” I demanded. Glancing around to the council, I could tell I wasn’t the only one feeling this way. But Alderan, despite his relative youth, had risen as the leader of the council. Nothing got approved without him saying so. It was downright annoying when he was obvious
ly wrong.
“That is not up to you to decide.” His eyes bore into me, daring me to keep arguing.
There was nothing more to say. I backed off and lowered my head as he dismissed the court and the elders. It would earn me a night in the brig to continue, so I yielded.
“Come on, man. Time to hit the road.” Jason placed his hand on my shoulder, urging me out. I shook my head, not believing the council could be so naïve. Well, not all of them. Many held a reserved concern in their eyes as they emptied their seats. The good it did me.
I spotted my brother waiting on the sidelines for me, sympathy ebbing from his eyes.
“Etan?”
“I can’t help you. You know that.”
“I know. But the KelHans are here. I swear to it. This could be bad. They’ll come for you. They could destroy everything before we can be ready to fight back.” I glowered at the last of the elders leaving their seats. “They’ll come for us all, and when they’re done, they’ll go after the ArcKnights too. Then what?”
Etan’s silence and somber expression were answer enough.
I shook my head. It was useless to plead my case.
“What happened? You were always so gung-ho to get shit done and do it your way when we were younger. Now you’re an empty shell taking orders from everyone but yourself. Where’s the brother I sacrificed myself for? I bled for you and here you stand, a coward still.”
“I can’t help you!” Etan snapped. “Even if I wanted to!” His own frustration swam across his face. I loved my brother, but I knew he had his hands tied. His lack of fight reignited my anger in ways I’d never expected. It tasted like acid on my tongue.
“You never wanted to help me,” I snarled.
I couldn’t hold back the pent-up rage which I’d kept locked up tight, deep in the crevices of my mind. Maybe I’d avoided facing these feelings for so long because I hadn’t quite forgiven Etan for what happened in the Pit. His immaturity and impulsive ways were the reason I’d been a slave for so many years. Now, when I needed him to fight with me, he cowered in the corner like a dog for its master’s command.