Read i bLEed DaRk - Poems About Pain, Life, Heavy Metal and Jesus Christ Page 6


  Good morning, Lord. I’m…I’m not sure where to start

  I come to you with a cheerless and overwhelmed heart

  “I know, child. I can feel the pain

  Stirring within you like torrential rain

  I know you’re scared and you don’t understand

  But NO PART OF THIS is out of my plan”

  Your…PLAN??!! How can THIS be your PLAN, Lord?!

  My body, mind and spirit are practically in one accord!

  Through blood, sweat and tears I’ve come so far!

  I’ve gone through so much, Lord! I’ve worked so hard!

  “This is only an imprisonment of body, child

  But your mind and your spirit are free to run wild

  For they cannot imprison your goals and your dreams

  So let them explode as laser beams!

  Try to find laughter while others will wail

  And KNOW that your God can NEVER fail!

  Do NOT let the enemy win this fight!

  For when he asked if he could have the right

  To put you through trials you’re experiencing now

  I pondered awhile, then made him a vow

  I said, ‘You MIGHT send her to prison awhile—

  You dark enemy, so wicked and vile—

  But what you mean to destroy her will not!

  For she is my child; much loved and blood-bought

  What you intend to use as a catalyst

  Of her eventual destruction will just

  Take her to places which she’s never been

  Where she’ll be My light in a cavern of sin

  This will allow her to help out the poor

  And the wretched to carry addictions no more

  Like Peter and Paul in the Bible, I will go

  With her each day – everybody will know

  She’s a warrior of God! You cannot defeat her!

  For I love and believe in and will now fight for her!

  Satan, you think that THIS will destroy

  This child of mine?! NO!! I will deploy

  Her to a new battleground when this is over

  For she is my daughter, my love and my soldier!’”

  Precious Savior, I know not what to say to this

  Should this happen, I’ll miss the freedom, and morning’s tender kiss

  But if this is the path to Heaven, I’ll take it

  As long as You’re with me I KNOW I can make it

  “Lo, I am with you

  ALWAYS

  Even unto the end of time”

  Titles O – S

  "Oh, What a Tragic Legacy!"

 

  I knew a man of bitter air

  With sharpened eye and tongue

  His presence I could hardly bear

  As he grew old from young

  Not a single friend had he

  Oh, what a tragic legacy!

  He lay there upon death's bed

  His wife as still as stone

  Though they said he'd soon be dead

  She'll be no more alone

 

  For she knows not what love can be

  Oh, what a tragic legacy!

  He growled at her into the night

  ‘Till full she felt of him

  Darker, blacker grew her plight

  Until his eyes fell dim

  For not one shred of love had he

  Oh, what a tragic legacy!

  No tears shed beside the bed

  As breath ebbed slow away

  No joy had we, but felt instead

  He'd squandered every day

  And still in death a scowl had he

  Oh, what a tragic legacy!

  She planned a cold and perfect wake

  With flowers bright and fair

  All "mourners" there but for her sake

  Contriving thoughts and prayers

  For such a bitter life had he

  Oh, what a tragic legacy!

  Although he lived in misery

  I'm glad I knew that man

  For I love all life's mysteries

  And steal joy where I can

  My faith, my wife, my family...

  Oh, what a golden legacy!

  “Painted Toenails on the Slab”

  Painted toenails on the one

  Cold-dead upon the slab

  A bright red polish bold

  Against the walls so tan and drab

  Thursday worries stolen by

  An evil act of hate

  A vibrant girl whose day unfurled

  A sudden, ugly fate

  Labcoat solders now begin

  Inspecting flesh and bone

  Grayed abrasions screaming out

  A story of their own

  One faux golden earring, where the other,

  No one knows

  Cut away the matching outfit

  Carefully she chose

  Methodically the cause of death

  Reveals a dreadful truth

  Rope burns all around the neck

  A shattered jaw and tooth

  Then her broken shell is stuffed

  Into a metal case

  Until someone she knew can put

  A name to her sad face

  Tears and cries of “Why?” are heard

  Though answers will not be

  Random chaos ripped

  The fabric of serenity

  Shadows there inside the tomb

  A shining light snuffed out

  And left behind a world of anger

  Worry, fear and doubt

  But in a Heaven not so far away

  She is set free

  Her soul to dance among the angels

  Barefoot and carefree

  “Peephole”

  Got my cherry slush

  Hold a royal flush

  In my crooked hands I hold a half an ounce of weed

  One eye shut up tight

  Pinched and frozen sight

  Universe in circles while the icy mountains breed

  Bells are ringing out

  A strobe-light flash of doubt

  Colored bubbles sparkle and explode inside my head

  Double-swinging lovers

  Jelly in the cupboard

  A blanket wrapped in Kool-Aid stains to cover up my bed

  Step two feet back when you talk stand in front of me

  So I can see you clearly

  Fear appears as round and hazy

  Do not faze or shake me, dear

  Hello? Who’s here? Perhaps I’m crazy

  But I see through my peephole clear

  Cut my paper skin

  The magic’s creepin’ in

  Yellow pigments flaky lying dead right at my shoes

  Ride a magic broom

  Liquid orange room

  Never threaten me again I’m paid up on my dues

  Violet walls will crack

  A needle full of smack

  When the powder hits my nose I’m freaking up my head

  Jumping Jacky Frost

  All I held is lost

  All is hopeless, lifeless, man; it’s meaningless and dead

  Phantom drums appear

  Scratch my bloody ears

  Bloody speakers start to cough in choppy clouds of smoke

  I’m not paranoid

  Wait...I heard a noise!

  Control is the illusion when I’m ridin’ high on coke

  On arthritic knees

  Begging Jesus please

  Melt the fog and wipe the sweat off of my fevered brow

  Clear away the door

  I’ve seen this one before

  As angels tend to wounds that speak of ancient, broken vows

  Step thirty-seven feet back; the door is gonna blow

  The Lord has saved my soul!

  Joy annoys as demons listen

  Lucifer has fallen here

  Hell beware – I’m on a mission

  I see through my new eyes clear

  ?
??Poem to My Lil’ Bit”

  This poem is for my precious daughter, Jess. I am fully aware that I mention wrapping baby fingers around mine in the poems to both her and Trey. I am further aware that a poet is not supposed to repeat themselves, but since this is my book, and that particular memory—along with both kids falling asleep on my chest when they were babies—is precious to me.

  Sometimes it seems like only yesterday

  You curled your tiny hand around

  My finger, your head lying

  Gently on my chest

  Breathing easy

  - At rest -

  Making tiny child noises, squeezing such

  Laughter, so many tears, from your

  Beautiful eyes, and I would

  Smile from my

  Heart at last

  - Happy -

  Do you fully understand that this feeling,

  For a loving father, never ends?

  I still long to protect you

  With everything I

  Am, even if

  I can’t

  But you remain the angel of my heart

  My shining little girl, and one of

  My great creations, my holy

  Discovery. I take you

  With me always

  - Everywhere -

  You were dedicated to the Lord, and are

  An amazing and beautiful creature

  Full of His great love, hope,

  Faith, laughter, mystery,

  Light, joy, beauty

  - All of it -

  Please carry me in your heart, and know

  I am standing right there beside you

  At all times. My dedication

  Is that rare, cool breeze

  In the desert. Know

  I love you, babe

  - Forever -

  “Prayer at Siren’s Call”

  Our house is located a couple of blocks from a nursing home, and we tend to hear sirens on a semi-regular basis. One of the traditions in our family I’m most proud of is that, upon hearing a siren, we try and stop to pray for the entire situation. This poem is not a verbatim “Now I lay me down to sleep” prayer we recite, but is a dedication to our tradition. It is a prayer for the Fire Fighters, Police Officers, Emergency Medical Technicians and all others who put themselves in harm’s way to secure the safety of strangers, and for the victims and their families, who never expected tragedy to visit them when they woke up today.

  “Go with heroes, God, I pray

  And clear a path to let them pass

  Keep them calm amidst the fray

  On streets of blood and broken glass

  Strengthen hearts of valiant ones

  Who risk their lives for us each day

  Bless these daughters, bless these sons

  Who dance in peril’s flame today

  May those caught in scenes of death

  Be comforted by Heaven’s light

  Let the dying feel Your breath

  Caress their cheek at final night

  Peace to those whose loss is near

  Be God to those who stand afraid

  Calm, I pray, these hearts of fear

  And let the sirens quickly fade

  In Jesus’ name…

  Amen”

  “Proverbs 7 (Looks That Kill)”

  Once, God spoke in whispers, saying, “My son, remember what I say

  Treasure and obey my commands, and you will not perish in dust

  Guard my teachings as your own eyes; write them on the tablet of your heart

  Treat wisdom as a sister, and she will guard you from sly and beguiling lust”

  Yet, from the window of my apartment, I peek out through the shutters

  And watch foolish men, young and old, fling themselves into the abyss

  Scuttling down the road toward houses of concealed and lethal desire

  Accidentally damning their souls, unaware that something is even amiss

  In the twilight of the evening (and sundown is just the beginning, mind you)

  A creature of lust approaches them, dressed as night, plans of clever deceit

  She’s always there, one minute hidden, the next minute bold as Vegas-neon

  Laughing, raucous and stubborn; born to wander lonely city streets

  She grabs and kisses them deeply, passionately, with no shame or apology

  Sighing, “I have the makings for a feast; I know the burning I feel, you feel too

  I have covered my bed with perfumed and silk sheets imported from Egypt

  Let us make love all night, for I have reserved all my passion only for you”

  Her clever words and come-hither glances seduce weak men into error

  Thus, many follow her blindly; an ox led to the butcher, a deer ensnared

  All fixated, careless animals, shot through the liver with a treacherous arrow

  Trapped, not knowing she would kill them, not even the wisdom to be scared

  Again the Lord said, “My sons, listen to me; Pay close attention to what I say

  Don’t be tricked by her; never go where she leads, and you can be saved

  She has ruined countless good men who have naively, needlessly perished

  Her illusory abode is a house of fools on the road leading down to the grave”

  Whether swathed in flesh or staring out from a clandestine computer screen

  Hallowed men of destiny must vow to shun this cheap and damning thrill

  We’ve all suffered the pangs of Madame Lust, promising quick adventure

  But hear me, brothers: this demonic spirit is not of God…

  She’s got the looks that kill

  “Rat in the Palace”

  Here, amidst all the golden silk

  There scurries a vermin, sir

  I speak the truth! For in this palace

  In this…cathedral…as it were

  Skitters tiny claws on marble floors

  Transporting ugliness and disease

  We must now dispatch a man from the village

  Who will dispel this dreadful creature with ease

  Thus screams my heart in the temple of God

  Upon first entering the door

  My soul enemy, the village man, whispers

  “Unworthy vermin, nothing more”

  My sin wreaks putrid, bringing foul odor

  To such a brilliant and sacred place

  And I weep at my fetid wretchedness…until

  Until

  Until I see Your face

  And you remind me I am born of you, my King

  You alone make me worthy

  And your hallowed blood expunges filth

  As I and my family begin to sing

  "Rumors"

  Yes, the rumors are true

  Jesus is the only way to Heaven

  I know, it's been misconstrued

  Some say there are many ways to God

  Or at least, what, six or seven?

  The other day some dude asked me

  "You Jesus people think you have found the only light?

  So all other religions—i.e. the whole world—

  are going to Hell? Ok, explain to me, genius:

  Why is it only Christians are right?"

  I can't tell ya, bro

  I didn't write the Book

  "S'all Good"

  In mourning of the lost art of “The Pursuit of Holiness” within the church

  S'all good!

  S'all I hear from hypocritical twice-a-monthers

  The "holiness challenged"

  “Wait, why'd you order a whiskey and cola, bro?"

  "S'all good! Bible only says 'be not drunk.'"

  While a 19-year-old at the next table is confused

  He didn’t think Christians were supposed to drink

  A week later

  A casual conversation is peppered with TV-PG curse words and locker room talk.

  "Wait, when did it become ok to talk like this, bro?"

  "S'all goo
d! I'm not taking God’s name in vain."

  While a 34-year-old thinks, "I'm not wasting anymore Sundays in church.

  Looks to me like we’re all the same."

  The following night

  Charley Black surfs the net for new porn.

  He's read all the old stories.

  Fourteen blocks away, Charley’s wife Judy is pressured into

  sleeping with her married boyfriend, the deacon.

  Two hours later they pray, “Forgive me, Lord. I won't slip again. S'all good!"

  The same prayer they’ve uttered 87 times before

  “Simple Prayers”

  Have you been taught to pray?

  I have, I dare say

  By podgy, stodgy professors

  In the most excruciating of lectures

  They tried to teach how to preach, what to say

  Although most of their words have skulked away

  There are many sides to me

  But I’m primitive when I spout God-pleas

  Just a one-trick pony, to be certain

  Once I step inside my prayer closet

  And draw the curtain

  So be forewarned: if you ask me to pray in front of others

  My unembellished prayers fail to impress some Christian brothers

  My words are a poor man in rags

  Creeping into God’s throne room

  Not like those rare and haughty Theology-hags