Read Ūnicornis Page 2


  She was also having trouble thinking of how she could stop Lucerna. How could you persuade a bunch of sheep to ignore a terrier that would tear them to shreds if they didn’t obey?

  ***

  When Crowther showed up at the Hall with a bronze shield, telling the story of its mysterious arrival outside his house, many of the believers were amazed. Crowther enjoyed the attention so much that he made up a dream that sounded like some kind of vision and told them all until he had almost convinced himself. He was encouraged still further when Lucerna presented him with a freshly printed copy of the book, updated and redesigned. She let everybody know that they would have to be dedicated if they wanted one as well. And in order to ensure nobody missed out, she expected a little more cash to appear next time…

  Meanwhile Lilian had not written in the visitor’s book yet. She and anybody else new were given the opportunity at once. Lilian thought it would be best to play along, so she wrote carefully, avoiding anything Lucerna didn’t know about already and writing in a way that made it seem as though she wasn’t used to writing very much. Lucerna would probably see through that…but then again she might not. She might just be reassured that Lilian wasn’t very bright. Which suddenly seemed like a good idea.

  ***

  It was at this point that people began asking Lucerna for guidance and advice. They would ask her after the meetings when they might speak to her, and she took advantage of the opportunity to establish her ‘beliefs’ in their minds even more at once.

  She gave them appointments, and turned up at the Hall several days in the week to answer people’s questions and discuss belief and the plans the Deus might have for their lives. They would bring their petty problems and she would read relevant chapters of her book to them and provide them with common sense to sort the problem. She was fascinated to discover how stupid and gullible most of these people were. What they considered as a major difficulty in their lives would have paled in comparison to anything Lucerna had ever had to deal with, and as far as she was concerned she’d had an unusually sheltered life. Which was why she was bored. And why she was doing this, because it alleviated the tedium a little.

  When you were reciting this stuff all the time though, it began to sink in. She didn’t have to read from the book anymore. It was all there at the front of her thoughts at any given moment. She began to take her own advice. She began to imagine the Deus was really watching them all. She began to imagine that the eye was really looking at them, that this greater power really would be disappointed if they didn’t turn up each week. If she didn’t turn up each week.

  It came about slowly; she barely noticed.

  ***

  Lucerna was scanning her audience with eagle eyes. She had chosen a particular person to go on a ‘quest’ for her. She didn’t really think they were going to succeed, because eighteen or nineteen year olds rarely succeeded in anything. If Lilian was anything to go by, eighteen or nineteen year olds were apologetic brainless idiots who didn’t know what to do with themselves. But that didn’t matter, because the plan would work out so nicely regardless of the outcome. She had hypothesized and written out all the possibilities to the last detail.

  There he was, she thought; instantly recognizable as a kid that had simply been dragged there by his parents: stony characters that she recognized as similar to how her own had been. And she remembered how they had been, deciding her future career and expecting particular standards, spoiling her with money and cold-shouldering her the rest of the time.

  She couldn’t have been more correct: Lord and Lady Payne were forever sending their son to interviews for work he didn’t want; he failed every time because he was utterly useless at anything they wanted him to be good at. They wouldn’t let him find himself employment or do anything remotely unorthodox because that might look bad on them. To distract him from the fact that he was semi-imprisoned, they spent money on him. Which meant very little, because they had a great deal of money.

  She had memorized all her notes and she knew who the boy was, yawning and not listening to a word she was saying. And now she was going to stop that.

  “Now before we leave, I must draw your attention to Chapter seventeen,” Lucerna announced. “Here the Deus has proclaimed: ‘the most evil of beasts is the Unicorn. It tells lies to innocent children and lures them away.’”

  She looked at them all sternly as though she really was concerned about a bunch of hypothetical kids that meant nothing to her.

  “I’m sure you have all heard tales of children vanishing without trace. Now you know that the Unicorn is responsible. Always.”

  She tapped the page of the book and continued, “the Deus here decrees that if one should find and slay the Unicorn, take it’s horn and offer it to the Deus, the one should be rewarded with ascension at once. I have been advised by the Deus to choose a particular one of you to complete this task. You must understand that it is a great honour to do this for the Deus. It is not to be refused.”

  Everyone glanced around at each other, wondering who this honoured person would be who would go on this adventurous-sounding quest for the Deus. Lucerna walked slowly through them. She was enjoying the silent tension; it made her feel powerful.

  Then she stopped in front of the boy, who was now retying his shoelace. Idiot, thought Lucerna.

  “Quinn Payne,” she said loudly. The boy looked up, startled.

  “What?” he asked mildly.

  Lucerna sighed. The idiot was ruining the atmosphere.

  “Were you even listening?” she said irritatedly.

  “Um, kind of,” replied Quinn.

  Lucerna glossed over it. “You have been chosen by the Deus to seek out and slay the Unicorn, the evil Unicorn. You must bring back it’s horn and if you do so you will win yourself ascension.”

  “Oh, okay,” said Quinn, not sure what that meant but guessing that winning stuff was quite good. Then he frowned. “Since when were Unicorns evil though?” he said bluntly.

  Lucerna wanted to scream.

  “They have always been and will always be. The Unicorn is a liar and has spread clever stories about its false goodness for hundreds of years. It is the manifestation of all that is wrong.”

  Quinn raised an eyebrow sceptically, but didn’t go a bundle on all those long words, so he shrugged and offered, “alright. What do I do?”

  Lucerna wondered if this was viable. “You will stay after this. I will explain.”

  Lucerna kept the boy for a short while after the meeting to talk some sense into him. She outlined the plan that he would have to leave in three days time and be back in three weeks time. It didn’t really matter if he failed at the whole quest, but it would be more interesting for her if he was successful. She knew that Unicorns did exist, because her friend Tessinika had seen one twice. Tessinika had said she’d never seen anything so beautiful. It wasn’t long afterwards they’d fallen out with each other, and although Tessinika was far from here now, Lucerna felt satisfied that her actions would be a way of getting back at her ex-friend for abandoning her.

  ***

  Quinn was not as daft as Lucerna had understood to begin with. He was just honest, straightforward, rational and well-meaning – everything Lucerna was not. He wasn’t really convinced that Unicorns even existed, and much less that he’d be capable of killing one, but decided he ought to humour this rather scary woman and at least try. Plus, it would get him away from his unbearable family for three weeks. He was one of five children and his two older brothers were a delight to his parents – the eldest one was married to a very glamorous girl and ran a business much like their parents’. The second one was much the same, minus the glamorous girl. The rest of them showed promising signs of being business minded also, apparently, and Quinn was the anomaly. He loved the outdoors, and quite liked having some money as long as he didn’t have to count it and spend his life accumulating more of it by ripping other people off. For his mother and father, rich merchants and sne
aky snobs, this was simply not good enough. They refused to let Quinn leave until he would conform. Quinn had reluctantly settled down to wait until they couldn’t be bothered to badger him any more. And now he was only too glad to take a break from the whole lot of them.

  He left with a plan of his quest and a stupid map that wasn’t very helpful at all and wondering how he would tell the Priestess in three weeks time that Unicorns…weren’t even real.

  ***

  Lilian, meanwhile, had been hiding behind a large stone bench, wondering how she’d explain to the Priestess why she was so very closely examining a piece of street furniture.

  She heard Lucerna wish Quinn good luck on his quest and Quinn’s scuffing footsteps as he dawdled home. Lilian waited until she heard the clatter of horseshoes from Lucerna’s horse fade away, then leapt from the ground to race after Quinn.

  Quinn turned, somewhat alarmed, to see a clumsy girl with a very pink face due to having been squashed into the ground, and a variety of mud blotches on her cream coloured tunic. Also in her now very untidy hair.

  “Stop,” she said helplessly. “I’ve got to tell you something.”

  Quinn had had quite enough of women trying to tell him things by this time, but as he was a generally nice person, he gave the girl a chance to explain herself.

  Lilian knew she didn’t have time to say anything really. She was certain that she’d be in trouble, and would probably have to think up some convoluted story to excuse herself.

  “I’m Lucerna’s – the Priestess’s – housekeeper,” stuttered Lilian. She caught her breath. “And I hate her,” she admitted, sounding rather surprised. “But that’s not the point,” she went on. Trust me, I’ve seen her plans and graphs and stuff, and she’s not up to any good. She’s started this whole thing to get money, that’s where all those ‘offerings’ go – in to her pocket. I think the power’s gone to her head. She has to be stopped. I don’t know what to do… But if you do what she wants, I don’t think you’ll be very well afterwards. Just a hunch.”

  Quinn blinked. “Who are you?” he asked curiously.

  “My name – my name is Lilian. I used to be in Felixia, but I had to earn a living and Lucerna picked me up while she was travelling there. I’ve been her housekeeper ever since. And nobody can see – everything she’s doing – they think it’s harmless, or real, or for the – greater good, or something, and I can’t believe they’re so stupid. It’s all for her own selfish greed. And now you don’t believe me, do you?”

  Lilian glared hopelessly at Quinn.

  Quinn was silent for a moment.

  “Yeah, I do actually,” he replied at last.

  “I think I’ll go and do this stupid quest, and when I come back I can tell her the truth, that unicorns aren’t even real anyway. She ought to know that already really. She can’t do anything if I can’t find anything.”

  “She can,” said Lilian, “to you.”

  “Hmm.” Quinn thought about the tall, imposing priestess.

  “When do you have to leave?” asked Lilian.

  “Three days from now,” said Quinn.

  Lilian realized she was running out of time.

  “I’ve got to go, or I’ll be in trouble,” she said. “But… be careful, okay? I don’t know what she’s doing, but I’ll try to find out. And at least you know now, not to trust her one bit.”

  “Thanks. I won’t.” Quinn nodded. “Good luck, Lilian,” he said slightly awkwardly.

  “You too!” Lilian said, hurrying away.

  ***

  It had never really been a question of whether she was in trouble or not; more how much trouble she would be in. Lilian sped back down the driveway of Lucerna’s house in the dusk, heart in mouth as she saw that the windows were already lit. That was Lilian’s call, and Lucerna hated having to do any chore herself.

  Lucerna whipped open the door as Lilian arrived in front of it.

  “What wonders. Where has the lovely Lilian been enjoying herself this past half hour?”

  “I -“ Lilian hung her head. It was just for show. She was thinking frantically. And she couldn’t show any sign of thinking on her face or Lucerna might get the impression she had a brain.

  “For the love of Curo, what in the world have you been doing that got you so filthy? Lilian, you are a disgrace.”

  Lilian was not shocked by the sentiment; but by the casual, natural and entirely subconscious way Lucerna had incorporated her invented belief into her own language, as though she really did subscribe to it herself.

  “I - I fell, Miss Lucerna. I tripped over – over a molehill. I am rather clumsy, I’m afraid. I had to go by way of a different path, through the fields, so that I would not be an embarrassment to your prowess.”

  “Indeed. And thank goodness, because certainly you should have been an embarrassment.” Lucerna felt a deep twinge of suspicion, yet couldn’t quite put her finger on it. She decided to let Lilian off – and then watch her like a hawk.

  “I do sincerely apologize, Miss Lucerna. I will try to be more careful next time.”

  Lucerna sniggered. “For your own sake, Lilian,” she said with a cold affection. “Change your clothes and finish your chores. I can hardly punish you for such a petty mistake.”

  Lilian bobbed a curtsey, an ominous feeling of being lured into a trap creeping up on her. Lucerna let her in and Lilian bustled off to change her tunic. Slightly frilly cream coloured things, she hated them. Lucerna wouldn’t let her wear anything else.

  As soon as Lilian was gone, Lucerna murmured, “if indeed it was a petty mistake… what are you playing at, girl?”

  Uneasily, she went to her study. If in doubt, write things down. She picked up her quill and turned over a sheaf of parchment. She rummaged in a folder and brought out a pile of lists, names… Then she began to write a few notes.

  Sent Quinn Payne on quest. He is less idiotic than I first supposed, though not by much. Luckily it makes little difference, he will die anyway… even if he is successful. But they will not see it as death, it will be ascension. Ascension. Unless he brings back nothing, of course. Then it will simply be punishment. And those who disobey the Deus must be punished… I can always send a gift to those parents of his, in case they liked him. I don’t think they do particularly either; he bears no resemblance to them in any case. Besides, I know they have plenty more. They won’t miss one. Of course, he may be pathetic enough to get himself killed out in the forest. Certainly Lilian would, if it was her, I feel sure. It will be entertaining to see.

  Lucerna considered. Either way, it would back up everyone’s belief. And talking of which, it was time to make an example of somebody. She wanted to instigate the idea that punishment by death was perfectly reasonable, and not as bad as it sounded because it would benefit everybody else by showing commitment to the Deus.

  Imagine if she could become the Queen Priestess Lucerna. The most influential, greatest, most powerful… And that really would be a triumph over Tessinika… She took up a fresh piece of parchment and wrote it. Queen Priestess Lucerna of the blessed chosen county Stellaria. Conqueror of the Unicorn.

  She sat there and fantasized for a little while. Then she shuffled the papers aside and went to retire for the night.

  ***

  The next day, Lilian was cleaning. She had prepared Lucerna’s breakfast, and Lucerna was eating it in the grandiose dining parlour. Lilian, as usual, had got up that little bit earlier in order to make an extracurricular batch of toast for herself. She was well into the habit of stuffing quantities of food in very fast, sweeping buttery crumbs from her face and serving up a modest amount for her mistress without a flicker. Lucerna always took Lilian’s pink cheeks as a sign of shyness, and mostly they were pink to ensure they weren’t purple with jam.

  After Lilian had left Lucerna to her breakfast, she would rush off to catch up with all the dusting, tidying and polishing that Lucerna’s house required. As usual, Lilian started with Lucerna’s study. Not as usual, she pic
ked up the parchment on the desk and read it all the way through. She couldn’t help it. She often glanced over things briefly and had gleaned a great deal of information that way, but to read it like a book was insane. She read the page about Quinn in horror. She read the ‘Queen Priestess Lucerna’… Lilian felt her breath go faster. This was wrong. This was all wrong. It was even worse than she’d thought. This was – she’d have to – Quinn! How could she let him know? She had expected the outcome could never be good, but she hadn’t thought that Lucerna was so very set on getting him killed whatever he did –

  Click. Clack. Click. Clack.

  “Ah. Lilian.”

  Lilian whipped round, the parchment still in her hand. Her mouth opened in horror. Lucerna had finished breakfast early. Too late, Lilian realized she’d given herself away. Desperately, she tried to cover it up with her usual method: pleading utter stupidity.

  “Oh heavens, Miss Lucerna, you did frighten me so. I was tidying your papers. Never fear, I cannot read a thing. At least, not in your beautiful writing!” Lilian corrected herself fast. Lucerna knew she could read, she had read the book…

  It was as though Lilian had never spoken.

  “Don’t. You. Dare. Speak of it. You know what I’m talking about. If you breathe a word,” Lucerna hissed, like an angry cat, “I will ensure you disappear. Do you understand, girl? You will die.”

  Lilian shook her head in disbelief.

  “I – Miss Lucerna, I cannot – I don’t – I didn’t –“

  “You DID!” Lucerna screeched. She snatched the parchment from Lilian and tore it to pieces. She threw the shreds in Lilian’s face.

  “There was nothing to see. You imagined it. It is gone. Now keep your mouth shut, you privileged peasant, and carry on.”

  She shoved Lilian out of the room.

  Lilian didn’t need her to – she was already leaving. Her ears were pulsing with hot blood. Two staircases down she choked on her tears.

  Terror invaded her every cell.