A Quilt for Dietrich Bonhoeffer
By Anna Scott Graham
Copyright 2014 by Anna Scott Graham
All of these poems were first published on my poetry website, A Poem a Day, Thereabouts, during National Poetry Writing Month 2014. Accompanying photographs complimented these poems, which can be viewed on the site. Thank you for taking the time to ponder these verses, written from the depth of my heart, if not always from the edges of my gray matter.
This volume is respectfully dedicated to Dietrich Bonhoeffer and Maria von Wedemeyer-Weller. And to my husband, with much love.
Table of Contents
Have You Seen Me?
The Following Way
The Non Sequitur Quilt (and its accompanying poem…)
For Richard…
Breakfast
Better To Not Watch
The Scrappy Quilt
No Title
Early Morning Poem
Changes Are Inevitable
Road Trip
By Sheer Force of Will
My Little Corner of the World
When the Pieces Fall into Place
Singing to Heaven
If Dietrich Bonhoeffer Made a Quilt…
One Month Ago
Short Poem about Unknown History
Ten Years Ago
A Plethora of Meanings
Nine Days of April Remain
A Quilt for Dietrich Bonhoeffer
This Is All I Have, This Is All I Need
The Daughter of a King
Rain and Hail and a Chat with My Daughter
The Smallest Gifts
Patches and Stashes
Just Sew Baby
Gone But Not Forgotten
The Ties That Bind
Have You Seen Me?
Christopher Vigil
From: Poudre Park, Colorado
DOB: 08/24/68
Sex: Male
Age: 45
Hair: Brown
Eyes: Green
Height: 4’8” (at age 10)
Weight: 74 lbs. (at age 10)
Date Missing: 04/30/78
Christopher Vigil has been missing for nearly 36 years. A picture of him from 1978, as well as an age-progressed photo, caught my eye as I ate dinner this evening, reminding me of a poem a day in April.
Is he alive, long dead?
Regardless, people remain who remember him.
My prayers are with them all.
The Following Way
Ah St. Paul
and his letters;
those Pauling treaties
exhorting the Romans, Ephesians,
Galatians, Philippians,
Thessalonians and Colossians.
To Timothy, Titus and Philemon,
and to those at Corinth.
Two letters to the Corinthians;
Saint Paul had something to say
no matter where he went
or to whom he spoke.
But even he noted,
in 1 Corinthians 12.31,
that they best way is the following way.
Yet love, love; what does it mean to love?
Paul denotes self-sacrifice, restraint, clemency.
But those are mere phrases,
for the underlying message is more subtle.
Not about clanging bells or noisy gongs,
nor the speech of angels.
What is that which withstands all time,
forever hoping, trusting, persevering.
What sort of love is this?
It’s the love of warm quilts,
gentle smiles,
tender hearts.
It revels in simplicity
soothing anger, calming fears.
It rejoices in the smallest triumphs,
and comforts with honest tears.
It is the best way,
Paul tells the church in Corinth;
it is the only way.
It is everlasting,
regardless of technology
and time
and pestilence
and disaster.
Poems will come and go,
even Paul’s many letters may one day pass away.
But the best way,
ahh…
Let me show you
the very best way.
The Non Sequitur Quilt (and its accompanying poem…)
Jack doesn’t know what Meg had for breakfast.
I don’t know where the quilt on the wall
is supposed to go.
To whom, I should say,
for every quilt needs a home,
just like a boll weevil.
For Richard…
My hands hurt.
I’ve been sewing, in one form or another, all day.
I quit just ten minutes ago when yet again I was stabbed by an errant pin,
with a mind of its own.
Fine, you win, I muttered under my breath,
wishing that pin had a burly cousin I could kick,
preferably in the shins.
Damn pins, but
you can’t quilt without them.
For Richard Brautigan
Breakfast
Grape Nuts and Special K (regular and some oat-honey flavor)
in three-quarter cup 1% milk.
And four dried apricots, on a separate small dish.
Followed by
half a small cup of
cranberry juice
washing down
10 mg of Lisinopril
and
12.5 mg of hydrochlorothiazide
to control my hypertension.
I am writing this as I finish the Grape Nuts/Special K
which were accompanied by St. Paul
and those Corinthians
(the 15th chapter).
But I thought of this poem
a couple of hours ago
after making love with my husband.
That’s my Saturday morning for you.
Better To Not Watch
I want to be a good fan, but I needed to take a break from quilting.
That’s how I could explain my timely exit from the living room
as Hanley Ramirez hit a home run, then another hit was made.
And now Matt Kemp has hit his second homer of the night.
Maybe there are other internet-based activities I could pursue.
Better than watching my team get beat by LA.
The Scrappy Quilt
Just big enough for me.
Well, me and one more, if they are suitably small.
Some quilts are like that; intimate.
Some are like Buicks,
but not this one.
The front is compiled of fabrics bought from different places,
the back from a chain store.
The front suggests boldness,
while the back calls to a young heart.
I made it while cool rain fell on California ground.
I finished it as summer broke down the door.
Started by hand, it was completed in the same manner;
I hid most of my stitches fairly well,
tucking threads between mitered corners.
I even managed a practically invisible join,
save a few lavender hints of thread
if you look hard enough.
But I doubt anyone will, for it’s a beginner’s effort,
not that of an expert.
It’s for staying warm,
it was for practice.
It was because I needed to fashion a piece of…
What is it a piece of anyway,
besides my heart and soul and the initial learning process
of a woman who h
asn’t used a sewing machine
in a very long time.
It was to get my feet wet.
And to keep them warm
when this brief spate of hot temperatures
has passed through.
It was to rattle the door of a long corridor which I am just starting to explore.
It’s for cool nights, snuggly cuddles, and…
And a way to tell a story
through fabric.
I can’t wait for the next tale to begin.
No Title
Green light
blue sky backdrop
everything has gone wrong
(or has it)
smallest windows give the biggest light
they don’t listen
(they never listen)
don’t trust him
She told me a story like this
on a particularly hot afternoon
as both of us walked back from the park.
I nodded, for what else was there to say?
Before we parted, I hugged her tightly
wondering why she tells me these things
and what she tells others.
I know she tells them something.
I just never know what it means.
Inspired by Endless Boogie’s “The Artemus Ward”
Early Morning Poem
In my living room
fragrant honeysuckle
blows through the open window
courtesy of a precariously placed fan
nestled between the wall
and window’s edge.
It’s 7.04,
clouds not allowing
shadows,
only lush honeysuckle
like memories of ancient days.
A gentle buzz
from the fan
doesn’t impede
on the quiet;
nor does the
ticking of a
cuckoo clock
on the other side of the room.
Nor do planes
stir a ruckus –
early flights
harbor no resonance
into this peaceful morning.
From where I sit
I can see the white and pale yellow blossoms.
My childhood was drenched in this scent,
as if the sun itself
smelled of this familiar sweetness
from the core of its being.
Of course the sun smells of honeysuckle –
what other scent would it emit,
what else is this correct?
In a few moments
this poem will end
and I will move onto
the next task of the day.
But in this moment,
honeysuckle reigns,
as does the precious wonder
of the beginning of another day.
Changes Are Inevitable
They thought they would never grow old.
Yet in those days age swept over them like youth had never existed,
or that’s how it seems, for in my memories they are
creaky old ladies who never appeared so young.
Women these days aren’t that much different,
although they can delay time’s ravages.
In the early 1900s, cosmetic alterations weren’t a consideration;
there was a war overseas,
then a depression,
then another war,
and so on and so forth
until by 1944 my grandmother was a mother
and twenty-two years later I was born.
By 1966, my grandmother was going gray,
even if she was in her mid-forties.
My two aunts were bottle brunettes,
which as a child never troubled me,
but as I age, only a few white hairs weaving through my tresses,
I wonder why they chose such dark colours.
However, that is irrelevant, in the larger scheme;
on that day, they were young women, my oldest aunt not even twenty,
her younger sister in her early teens,
and my grandmother a spunky, suntanned little girl
who never wore dresses to my memory,
preferring polyester pantsuits.
She was their half-sister, born just enough years into the new century
that decades later dresses were for old women,
like her two sisters.
Grandma liked pants,
but Auntie E. wouldn’t have been caught dead in trousers.
I didn’t know Aunt B. very well, but she was a part of that trio
that over the years drifted apart,
although you wouldn’t know that from photographs
that fill ancient albums
tucked away in plastic tubs in our back bedroom closet.
In those snapshots the women are close,
captured in various poses throughout the years
often alongside their mother and my grandmother’s father
who was considered as Dad by all three girls.
That’s how it was in those days, a strong male figure
becoming papa to fatherless girls
who weren’t going to be girls for that long.
Auntie E. married young, divorced, then married again, but never had children.
Aunt B. married four times, had two daughters, who were my dad’s only cousins.
Grandma married Grandpa, my father their only child.
Grandma was the little girl, Toots they called her,
adored by her father,
loved by her mother and sisters,
loved by me.
I’m the age she was when I was born,
no grandchildren of my own (yet),
but memories butt up against experience,
making me very aware that time is fleeting,
change is inevitable,
life is fragile.
My grandmother was born in 1919;
her centenary is just five years away.
In 2019 I’ll be fifty-something,
maybe standing by a car with my sisters
dreaming dreams that will be passed along
to various children and grandchildren.
No longer young, but youthful at heart,
as if time is ethereal,
and life never ends.
A hundred years
or a few seconds;
what’s the difference in the grand scheme?
This poem is based upon a photograph from the mid-1920s of my grandmother and her sisters, and other women, standing near an old car in the warm Northern California sun.
Road Trip
My bum is so weary;
over six hours in the car
to hang out with my parents
while Dad gets another round of chemo.
Today we took my husband’s car,
which while sporty and possessing a working cruise control,
is somewhat uncomfortable.
Yet, I’d go another three, four hours even
to hear Dad’s stories
about ranchers and cowboys
long since passed into ethereal lore.
Dad has a way with stories,
perhaps I get my love of spinning yarns from him.
He told of an old man named Ivy
who admonished the boys they were working too hard;
just harrow the field, plant the seed,
then wait for the rain.
Wait for the rain,
my father intoned,
as if channeling Yoda.
Instead he was hearkening back to Ivy,
who’s been dead for probably forty years.
Yet to Dad, Ivy was alive and well
as if no time had passed.
Later I told my husband that next time
I wanted to write down these details
because when Dad goes,
so will the tales he so relis
hes to tell.
Sitting with my father
during the anti-nausea meds
then the chemo
is just as much for me
as for him and Mum;
today’s inclusion of my husband
gave the men time to chat
while we ladies spoke about zucchini recipes.
Mum has many,
which is good for they still need to plant some zucchini
although the Early Girls and volunteer cherry toms
are in the ground.
Dad still farms,
but the crops are strictly for personal use,
veggies that until this spring went in with ease.
This year, he takes plenty of rest in between,
getting the crops into the ground
on his good days.
Those will last through the weekend,
but by Easter, he’ll be feeling the effects of today’s spoils.
On Easter, our next visit north,
my husband I and will drive my car
to my sister’s house,
but we won’t be the only ones making the road trip.
I’m hopeful Dad will join us;
wild horses probably won’t keep him away.
Old Man Ivy will be filling Dad’s head,
more stories spilling from his tender gums.
But chemo isn’t the killer;
it’s cancer,
and so far
Dad’s staying one step ahead.
I’d drive all night
to hear one more tale.
Thank goodness Dad’s got them to spare.
By Sheer Force of Will
Piecing quilt rows is sort of like a Jedi mind trick;
you really want to meet up at every corner.
I had to rip out the first two rows I did,
and still less than three quarters were meeting at their respective corners.
By the third row, I was wondering just how this quilt was eventually going to appear.
It needed to go home and rethink its life.
By the fourth row,
which will be all I sew this evening,
I decided to bend those fabrics to my will.
I didn’t realize I was Jedi
until I had sewn about a foot, which was about three blocks’ worth.
All the corners were perfect.
I continued another foot or so,
checked those meeting points;
all were correct.
I kept sewing, until I reached the end,
but I didn’t check it immediately.
I had a drink of water,
walking into my quilt/writing grotto,
then laid the sewn blocks into my table.
Then I opened the newly added strip,
amazed that by sheer force of will