Ever since her husband of twenty-two years passed away suddenly last year, Hannah had been trying to adjust, trying to get used to her new life of solitude, and trying to figure out why, in the middle of her life, she was all alone. She had no husband and despite several attempts and failed pregnancies, she had no children either. Hannah closed her eyes and remembered her husband, and went outside.
She trudged through the grass and trees to survey her farm. Surprisingly, everything looked dry. She looked up at the sky but she didn’t see a sign of rain. The sun shone down like polished gold. Hannah looked over the fence and saw her neighbor, Mrs. Bontrager. “Good morning.”
“Good morning.” Mrs. Bontrager hollered over the fence. “How are you?”
“Well, I’d be better if we could get a little rain,” Hannah said.
“I know. It’s been so dry lately.”
Hannah kneeled down to examine the crops. “I hope it doesn’t destroy our produce.”
“Let’s hope it doesn’t.” Mrs. Bontrager shook her head.
“I pray God’s mercy over us.” Hannah looked up to the sky and prayed, “Father, please send us some rain soon.”
Mrs. Bontrager nodded silently.
Hannah turned to her garden, sighed heavily, and then went inside.
She needed this crop to be a good one, better than ever before so that it could help to pay off the debt on the land that her husband left behind. If only he hadn’t left so suddenly with a heart attack, she wouldn’t be in this predicament. Lord, why did he have to die at all?
But Hannah refused to let the grief she felt for her deceased husband and her empty womb stop her from doing God’s will.
She went out to the barn to feed her animals and talked to them lovingly just as her husband always had. She milked her cows, collected her eggs and even chose a few of her pigs for sale. Then she went back out into the field to check a few of her seedlings; some of them needed extra attention.
Her neighbor came over to the fence again. “I see you’re back at it again. Why not get some of the boys to help you out?”
Hannah stood up straight, wiping the sweat from her brow. “There’s a lot of work to be done but with my tight budget, I can’t really afford to hire anyone full time, at least not now.”
The neighbor looked Hannah up and down. “Did you let folks know that you’re looking to hire?”
Hannah wiped her sweaty hands on her apron. “Yes. I put up a Help Wanted sign on the side of the road but no one has answered it yet.”
“Well, until then you’ll just have to keep pushing. My son can probably help out a little, just until you find someone.”
Hannah smiled and thought about how nice it would be if she had her own son to help her. “Thanks so much for the offer but God will provide; I’ll be okay.”
Mrs. Bontrager nodded and stepped away from the fence. “I’ll talk to you later.”
Hannah waved to her neighbor. She seemed nice enough and kept to herself for the most part, but the woman had eight children, all healthy and strong. Hannah thought of her own life and how she had prayed for a child, just one child. She remembered the last one she’d lost two months after conception. Hannah and her husband were devastated.
That was just two years ago but the memory was as fresh as if it were yesterday. Hannah wiped a solitary tear from her eye.
The mailman stopped by to deliver the mail and Hannah walked to the mailbox to see what news today would bring. Just as she’d expected, it was almost time for another loan payment and since she had been using her small savings, she wasn’t sure how much longer she could keep this up. She calculated her expenses and realized that after she paid the loan, there would be nothing left. Her savings would be empty and she feared losing the farm and all that she and her husband had worked so hard for all of these years. She didn’t have any idea how she was going to make the next payments and she only had a few weeks to figure out something.
She walked back to the garden and kneeled down on the ground to pray. Her body was tired and her soul was weary but she wouldn’t give up.