William Gaddis
Carpenter's Gothic
1
The bird, a pigeon was it? or a dove (she'd found there were doves here) flew through the air, its colour lost in what light remained. It might have been the wad of rag she'd taken it for at first glance, flung at the smallest of the boys out there wiping mud from his cheek where it hit him, catching it up by a wing to fling it back where one of them now with a broken branch for a bat hit it high over a bough caught and flung back and hit again into a swirl of leaves, into a puddle from rain the night before, a kind of battered shuttlecock moulting in a flurry at each blow, hit into the yellow dead end sign on the corner opposite the house where they'd end up that time of day.
When the telephone rang she'd already turned away, catching breath, and going for it in the kitchen she looked up to the clock: not yet five. Had it stopped? The day was gone with the sun dropped behind the mountain, or what passed for one here rising up from the river. — Hello? she said, — who…? Oh yes no, no he's not here he's… No I'm not, no. No, I'm… Well I'm not his wife no, I just told you. My name is Booth, I don't even know him. We've just… Well if you'll just let me finish! We've just rented his house here, I don't know where Mister McCandless is I've never even met him. We got a card from him from Argentina that's all, Rio? Isn't that Argentina? No it was just a card, just something about the furnace here it was just a postcard. I'm sorry I can't help you, there's somebody at the… No I have to go goodbye, there's spmebody at the door…
Somebody hunched down, peering in where she'd stood staring out there a minute before, a line straight through from the kitchen past the newel to the front door fitted with glass, shuddering open. — Wait! she was up, — wait stop, who…
— Bibb?
— Oh. You frightened me.
He was inside now, urging the door closed behind him with his weight against it, bearing up her embrace there without returning it. — Sorry, I didn't…
— I didn't know who you were out there. Pushing open the door you looked so big I didn't, how did you get here?
— Coming down 9W in a…
— No but how did you find it?
— Adolph. Adolph said you'd…
— Adolph sent you? Is something wrong?
— No relax Bibb, relax. What's the matter anyhow.
— I'm just, I've just been nervous. I've just been very nervous that's all and when I saw you out there I, when you say Adolph sent you I thought something's wrong. Because something's usually wrong.
— Bibbs I didn't say that. I didn't say Adolph sent me… He thrust his legs out from the chair across the hearth from her where she'd come down to the edge of the frayed love seat, knees drawn tight and her hands caught together at her chin, pressed there. — When I saw him last week he told me where you'd moved, I didn't know what you'd…
— Well how could you know how could we tell you! How could you know where we'd moved you never, we never know where you are nobody knows. You just show up like this with your, your boots look at your boots they're falling apart look at your, that hole in your knee you don't even have a jacket, you…
— Oh Bibb, Bibbs…
— And it's cold!
— Well Bibbs Jesus, you think I don't know it's cold? I've been on the road sixteen hours. I'm driving this moving van down from Plattsburgh with no heater, I had to cut it out when the cooling system went. Twice, the whole fucking thing broke down twice and it just broke down again right up here, up on 9W. I saw the sign and remembered this is where Adolph said you moved to so I walked down here. That's all.
— You look tired Billy, she said in a voice near a whisper. — You look so tired… and her own hands fell away.
— You kidding? Tired, I mean that fucking truck you wouldn't…
— I wish you wouldn't smoke.
He threw them, match and cigarette together, at the cold grate, came forward on a torn knee to pick them up where they'd hit the firescreen. — You got a beer?
— I'll look I don't think so, Paul doesn't…
— Where is he? I saw the car I thought he'd be here.
— It's broken, he had to take the bus in this morning. He hates it, Billy…? She was up, calling from the kitchen — Billy? She looked up to the clock, — he'll be here any minute I just don't want…
— I know what you don't want! He was up talking loud to walls, to the balustrade mounting from the newel at the door, to furniture — Bibb?
— There's no beer, I'm making tea if you…
— You just want me gone before Paul shows up, right? And he was across the room pulling open a door under the stairs on the cellar dark below, jamming it closed and opening another and stepping in without a light, standing over the bowl there. — Bibb? from the opened door. — Can you lend me twenty?
The cup rattled on the saucer, passing. — Oh I should have told you. This one stops up, I should have told you to use the upstairs…
— Too late now… he came out tugging his zipper, — can you lend me twenty Bibb? I was going to get paid when I got the van down there but…
— But what about it, the van. You just left it?
— The hell with it.
— But you can't just leave it there, up there right in the middle of the…
— You kidding? The alternator's shot, you think I'm going to sit up there all night with it? Send that heap out on the road they can come haul it in.
— But who? Whose is it, what are you doing driving somebody's moving van down from…
— Like what do you think I was doing, Bibb? I was trying to make seventy five bucks, what do you think I was doing.
— But you said you just saw Adolph, I thought you…
— Oh come on Bibb, Adolph…? He was down in the chair again, one hand cracking knuckles on the fist of the other. — Adolph wouldn't give me the sweat…
— I wish you wouldn't do that.
— What, about Adolph? He…
— With your knuckles, you know it makes me nervous.
His shrug dropped him deeper into the chair, one hand seized in the other. — Sit there in his paneled office I have to listen to every fucking nickel he's accountable for to the trust, the estate, the lawsuits the nursing home bills his duty to conserve the assets I mean shit, Bibbs. No wonder the old man made Adolph his executor. He sits there guarding the estate with one hand, dealing out this lousy trust with the other him and the bank, Sneddiger down at the bank. Ask one of them for a nickel he says the other one might not approve this expenditure, I mean that's the way the old man set it up. Just to keep us…
— Oh I know it, I know…
— Just to…
— Well it's almost done, isn't it? It's almost done, by next spring you'll…
— That's the trust Bibb, that's just the trust that's what I mean. That's how he set it up, just to keep us out of the estate, by the time we get there there won't be one anyhow. Twenty three lawsuits Adolph says, they've got twenty three lawsuits by stockholders against the company and the estate trying to get back what the old man handed out in those payoffs. The estate is using every resource at its disposal in dealing with these cases says Adolph, every resource that's Adolph. That's him and Grimes and all of them do you think they want to settle it? Every resource do you think they give a shit if they win it or lose it they just want to keep things going, adjournments postponements appeals they charge the estate every time they pick up the fucking telephone they're talking to each other, like they're all sitting in each other's laps picking each other's noses two hundred dollars an hour every one of them Bibb, they're talking to each other.
— But what dif…
— I mean every time I go in there Adolph has to remind me how they smoothed the way for the old
man's retirement when he could have gone to prison instead. I mean why didn't he. He should have gone so should Paul, so should…
— Billy please, I don't want to go over it again, just go over it and go over it Paul just did what he was told, it was all going on long before he went there anyway. What was Paul supposed to do, they even said it wasn't against the law didn't they? Even the papers, when the…
— Then how come there's all these lawsuits? If it wasn't against the law how come there's twenty three lawsuits, if the old man wasn't as smart as Uncle William he'd be in prison right now but he takes the fast way out like he always did, like he always did Bibb. He crapped on the floor for somebody else to clean up that's all he ever did and there was always somebody there to clean up. There was always Adolph cleaning up that's what he's doing now, that's all he knows how to do. Two hundred dollars an hour he'll keep cleaning up till there's no fucking estate left, you know what he just did? Adolph? He just gave Yale ten thousand dollars did you know that? From the estate, ten thousand dollars for Yale while you're living in this old dump and I'm out driving a broken down…
— But it's not! It's a beautiful old house it's what I always…
— Come on Bibb it's a heap, look at it. Over there in that alcove, take one look at the ceiling and it's ready to fall down, you know what Adolph just spent on those copper roofs at Longview? He just came back, him and Grimes and Landsteiner all of them, they were all down there. You know why? Reviewing the estate's assets Adolph tells me, you know why? right now? It's duck season. Go down there and blow every duck they can see out of the sky and the estate pays every nickel, Adolph doesn't know a twelve bore Purdey from a Sears, Roebuck but he's down there banging away at anything that moves. Conserving the assets they call it, so they decide to spend thirty seven thousand dollars on the roofs, I mean thirty seven thousand dollars. Those copper roofs they're supposed to turn green to go with all that fucking moss hanging off the trees, Longview they call it Longview you can't see ten feet through the…
— Oh I know it I know it…! The saucer rattled the cup and she set it down, — please don't let's keep going over it please!
— All right Bibb, but I mean he could have left it to us couldn't he? Or Bedford, even Bedford, I saw Lilly…
— Leave you Bedford? You think he'd have left you Bedford after that last party you had there? That party when he was off in Washington putting cigarettes out on the carpets and all the broken glass and Squeekie passed out right in his own bathtub? and then somebody painting a hat on his portrait in the library with Day-Glo, you thought he'd leave you the house after that?
— He could have left it to you at least.
— I never liked it. Paul would go crazy at Bedford.
— Paul will go crazy right here. Let Lilly go crazy at Bedford, I saw her coming out of Adolph's office. She was in there trying to get some money to heat the place this winter, she's scared all the pipes will break. Not a nickel, not from Adolph. He always hated her.
— He didn't hate her, he just didn't like the idea of a big country house like that going to a secretary who…
— Who the old man had been screwing for twenty years? so he leaves her a lousy house without a nickel to run it and Adolph jumps right in and pulls out all the furniture? Where is it anyhow, those two big marquetry chests and those chairs from the…
— In New York. It's all in New York, in storage there. We had to rent this furnished, for a while anyhow till they get their things out, or her things, I think it's all hers it's all kind of confused…
— But I mean what are you doing here anyway Bibbs, this broken down little town how did you…
— We just had to get out of New York that's all, we just found this through an agent and took it. You saw me down there the last time I couldn't even breathe, it's filthy, everything, the air the streets everything, and the noise. They were tearing up the street it sounded like machineguns and then they started blasting right on the corner. They were starting a new building right there on the corner and every time it went off Paul went right up the wall, he still wakes up at night with…
— Man like he's already up the wall, he's been up there since he came back whose fault is that.
— Well it's not his! If you'd been old enough to be…
— No come off it Bibb, I mean all that southern officer bullshit of his? that dress sabre with his name engraved down the blade from that half ass military school he went to? And I mean what he told you his father said? his fucking own father? That it's a damn good thing he was going in as an officer because…
— I've told you! It's not, I never should have told you that it's not your…
— I mean how could he tell you! Like how could anybody tell something like that he's already up the wall, he can't get a job he can't even look for one so he pretends he's setting up his own business? I mean he goes in and tells Adolph he's…
— Well he is.
— He's what, setting up his own business where, here? Like what's he going to do, open a laundry? buy you a washboard and…
— Billy stop it, honestly. It's a consulting, being kind of a consultant, I mean it's what he's done before when he was…
— Paul the bagman.
— Please! Don't, start all that… She was up, through to the kitchen. — Twenty? is that enough?
— Bibb…? He followed her in, — I mean you know what he…
— Please I don't want to talk about it… She'd pulled open a drawer, digging under linen napkins, under placemats, — just twenty? You're sure that's enough?
— It's plenty… and as she bent tucking the napkins back he ran a hand over her arm bared to the shoulder, over the bruise there. — This some of Paul's work?
— I said I don't want to talk about it! She pulled away, — here! I, I just…
— Bumped into a bookcase, great… he thrust the bill into a shirt pocket. — I mean you know why he married you, we all…
— All right! I, I just… she came after him to the front door, — I just wish…
— I wish too, Bibb… he pulled the door open, grazing the newel there, and he was out, shoulders hunched against the chill. — You any better up here? your asthma?
— I don't know yet I, I think so. Will you be all right Billy?
— You kidding?
— But where do you, where are you staying, we never…
— Sheila. Where else.
— I thought that was over. I thought she went to India.
— She came back.
— Will you call? Will you, wait will you hand me the mail? I don't want to come out… She reached a bare arm for it, he slapped the mailbox shut and then stopped by the car stalled on the apron there, rocked it with one hand.
— What's wrong with it.
— I don't know, it just doesn't go. Will you, there's the phone, Billy? Please call me…? She came through looking up to the clock, sat down with a shiver. — Yes hello…? No, no but I expect him any minute. Could he call you back when he… Yes any time, this evening yes any time this evening, I'll tell him yes… She hung it up and left her hands there, resting on it, and her forehead down to rest on the back of a hand drawing breath, drawing breath, till she heard the door.
— Liz…?
— Oh. There was a call for you. Just now, a Mister…
— What the hell is he doing out there!
— Is, who…
— Billy, your God damn brother Billy he's out there under the car, what the hell is he doing here.
— Well he just, I thought he'd…
— The usual? came to borrow money? How did he get here.
— Well he, he just showed up, he…
— He always just shows up. Did you lend him any?
— How could I Paul, I've only got nine dollars left from…
— Good, don't. Any calls?
— Yes just now, Mister Ude? He said he'd call back.
— That's all?
— Yes. No I mean there w
as a call for Mister McCandless, it was somebody from the IRS Paul when can we get this phone thing straightened out, all I do is answer these calls for…
— Look Liz, I can't help it. I'm trying to get a phone put in here under a company name, as soon as the…
— But when they shut it off in New York the bill was over seven hun…
— That's why I'm putting it under a company name! Now God damn it Liz stop pushing me like this the minute I walk in the door, you'll just have to put up with it. Hang up on them, now look what about your brother. Will you see what the hell he's doing out there?
— Maybe he's trying to fix it, the car I mean, he…
— He couldn't fix a rollerskate. I've got to get that thing fixed, this God damn bus what was I, half an hour late just now? Traffic backed up all the way down 9W to the bridge there.
— On 9W? Was there, was everything all right? I mean…
— What do you mean all right, I just told you traffic's backed up for three miles, police cars wreckers the works… He'd turned from the kitchen doorway to the one opened under the stairs. He snapped on the light there, — Liz? Look don't let him in the house again, just don't let him in. He doesn't know how to live in a house, he doesn't even know how to flush the toilet when he's…
— No wait Paul wait! I told him not to it's stopping up again, don't…
— Well Christ…
— But I told you not to…
— Too late yes, it's all over the God damn floor.
— Paul wait, Billy…? She was up for the door, — Paul? I'll clean it up, Billy what…
— Come out here a second Paul? We might get this heap started… He let the door go without waiting, was down on his back on the broken stone of the apron. — Starter's jammed. Paul?
— Wait a minute…
— Reach in and turn the key when I get under here.
— Wait a minute Billy wait! The whole God damn thing's tipping, this little stick of wood you've got it jacked up on, you can't…
— Can't wait or I won't be able to see anything… he was already halfway under, bootheels scraping the leaves, the broken stone, — ready?
— Wait… The car swayed, he stood back from it reaching in, licked his lips looking down at the dumb angle of the wooden block, the denimed swell of ribs creased under the rocker panel.