From the Pit
By Bonnie Mutchler
Copyright 2010 by Bonnie Mutchler
Cover design copyright Joleene Naylor 2009. All rights reserved.
Cover Fonts by Larabie Fonts (https://www.larabiefonts.com/ )
Other poetry collections by Bonnie Mutchler:
Inside the Worm
The Egg of Orlin
From The Mist
********************
A Love Story
(My apologies, this isn't really a poem, it's just a damn good love story)
"I love you madly, yes, madly, Zigfreid! Do you hear? I don't care if the whole world knows. I could shout it from the windows down to the street below." Hand to brow, she crossed the room and flung open the casement window, "World---I love this man madly.
He is my reason for living and breathing!" She leaned further out the window. The bells in the church began to toll down the street. "Hear sweet heaven proclaim our love!"
Suddenly her foot slipped and she plunged head first over the sill and hurtled to the pavement below, splatting on the sidewalk.
"Damn!" said Zigfreid, "Another mess to clean up!"
**********
A Toast
When the wars of men become hopeless,
Some just surrender.
But some go down fighting
With blood on their hands.
And they silently lay in their graves
In the quiet of twilight,
Remembering their deeds
Long after their deaths.
The debt that is owed can never be paid
To the heroes from yesterday.
A toast to the men who are brave;
To the ones who lie buried below.
**********
Africa's Screaming
Hear the last drum as it rings
Across the Serengeti
Where the dusty earth is frying,
The parched, yellow grass is crying
And the elephants are dying.
Listen - while the world lies dreaming,
She's alone - Africa's screaming.
See dark faces at the fire,
Creased and worn with faded eyes.
Ever struggling for her power,
Ancient dreams have all turned sour,
Raped and pillaged and devoured.
Listen - 'neath the hot moon, beaming,
She's alone - Africa's screaming.
See the children's futures stolen
While their bellies are all swollen.
They are brought down to their knees
By poverty and grim disease,
And there is nowhere to flee.
Listen - to the land as it lies weeping,
She's alone -- Africa's screaming.
When will she leave her past behind,
End the hate and genocide?
All the tribes that stand divided
Have common ground if they decided
To stand together and just find it.
Listen - hope is ever gleaming,
She is waiting - End the screaming
**********
Alaska
(for Chris)
She's a rare and wild beauty
That entraps a young man's soul
With her pale, pure swollen bosom
And her heart of solid gold.
She's a temptress, she'll seduce him
And she'll never let him go,
For his heart will long forever
For her flowing fields of snow,
For her rugged peaks and valleys,
Summer wilderness of green,
For her sunlit sky of glory
Where God's hand can still be seen.
Though she's harsh and sometimes brutal,
He will only see her best
And he'll love her like no other
'Til he's finally laid to rest.
Then he'll sleep a peaceful slumber
Gently folded to her breast,
For he lived and died Alaskan,
That fair land so richly blessed.
**********
American Dream
So here's to pipe dreams and hopes without cause,
Love everlasting that's always on pause,
For there is no truth, no honor, no peace,
No real understanding, no trust or belief.
We eat without tasting, while others have none,
We drink without thirst, we laugh with no fun.
We sing with no music, we speak with no thought,
And surrender ourselves for what we are taught.
**********
Beauty
Her beauty is to be desired
Above all other things,
But she'll take your heart, she'll take your soul,
She'll take your breath away.
She'll take your hopes, she'll take your dreams,
Your very last thin dime.
She'll strip you clean, then tell the world
You're just a waste of time.
**********
D.B.L.C.
You were never a true lover,
Though you left me with the blame,
And I'm desperate and lonely,
How I wish you felt the same.
How I wish your heart was breaking
And a fine mist burned your eyes,
Late at night as I lay thinking,
It would be like paradise.
Just to know you are suffering,
Just to know that you're in pain,
Just to know that you are human,
Then my heart could beat again.
**********
Do You Remember
Do you remember
The days now dead and gone?
The music swelled around us
And the band played on.
All of time was nothing,
For forever beckoned sweet
And love was reckless
As we bowed at Ero's feet.
Do you remember
When I thought you were the one?
I trusted you to be there
Constant as the moon and sun.
Foolish was and always will be,
Foolish gives and ne'er receives.
Foolish always trusts a lover;
Foolish always will believe.
Foolish cares and foolish answers
Every call and every need.
Foolish always plays the jester;
Foolish dies and foolish bleeds.
Do you remember?
**********
From Underneath
The world looks different from underneath
When there isn't a penny to buy some bread
And there is no heat, so you stay in bed
Reading stories to hungry children
Of the feasts they cannot have.
The world looks different from underneath
When you reap the sour and the only sweet
Is grudgingly given without dignity,
And the only light in an old man's eyes
Are the tears of want that he meekly cries.
The world looks different from underneath
When you're sick and alone, with no relief
And there is no care, for you're turned away
To a silent world to wait and pray
For release in death and a hollow grave.
The world is different from underneath
When you struggle for hope midst disbelief
And wallow in pain and rage and grief.
There is no escape, there are no dreams,
Just the reality of poverty.
**********
Fuck Love
See it twist and fall apart,
Broken dreams and
broken heart.
Mental pictures passing by,
Smells a lot like suicide.
Spit it out and suck it in,
Tastes just like a second sin.
Hold your breath and close your eyes,
Falling, falling hypnotized.
Pick up pieces one by one,
Build a wall and when you're done
In they come with siege machines,
Wooden ladders, kerosene.
Tear it down and fall apart,
Just another wasted start.
Fascinated by the lies,
Falling, falling hypnotized.
Drink the water, drink the wine,
Eat the scars they leave behind.
Touch the fire, feel the pain,
Memories of faithless strain.
But the solace of the tune
Gets entangled with the moon,
Bitten, helpless, paralyzed
Falling, falling, hypnotized.
Hide the heart, restrain the mind,
Does no good for love's unkind.
Insidious, it oozes in
Between the cracks beneath the skin
Callously it bends the will,
Licks the wounds that never heal.
Rent and hollowed, sacrificed,
Falling, falling hypnotized.
**********
Growing Up
When I was a child, I dreamed like a child,
Of sunshine and laughter and roses,
Of life in starry-eyed poses,
Of love with its passion and flame.
Back then it was only a game,
Only a dream.
But the years go along
To adulthood and on
And slowly the dreams fade away.
One by one they go day by day,
'Til there's nothing to hold back the pain;
Nothing to relight the flame ---
Just ashes ---
Just ashes and waste.
**********
In The Face of the Stars
Like horses that race with the wind in their tails
'Cross purple horizons, along dusty trails,
They bind us to dreams and they cast on us spells
'Til somehow they make us feel clean.
Like heroes who fight when their last hope is gone,
They dazzle the heavens and outshine the sun,
They make us think maybe the battle is won
And valleys are once again green.
Like the eagles that fly, like the wind in the trees,
We float above earth, feeling restless and free,
Not knowing the answers, not caring to see
The ugliness growing below.
We're children that run in the face of the stars,
Removing our shackles and hiding our scars.
Like the dim moon that trickles it's light from afar,
Someday we may learn how to glow.
**********
Liar
Don't know what to say,
You take my breath away.
Is there any point in me believing?
May be paradise
Looking in my eyes,
But you've never hesitated in the leaving.
Give it one more day,
But it always ends the same.
Can't be any reason now for staying.
Tell me every lie,
it makes me want to die
When I can't believe a single word you're saying.
**********
Lies
"I want to love you forever;
Swear you'll leave me never.
You're all I need, my dream come true,
And I have found my world in you!"
Isn't it funny how quick you discover
All of the lies you've been told by your lover?
**********
Marlowe
In a blinding burst of passion
In the steaming summer heat,
As the red light slowly flashes
We can feel our bodies meet.
Our hearts, as they are pounding,
Keeps rhythm with the beat
Of the record slowly turning
And the noises from the street.
Our fevered flesh is burning
Rubbing 'cross the wrinkled sheets
That smell of sweat and cigarettes.
The bedsprings gently creak,
Keeping time with the headboard
As it bangs against the wall
And the throaty groans and whispers
While our bodies rise and fall.
There's the trembling touch of fingertips,
Our lip both moist and sweet;
The moment's come and then it's gone,
Satisfaction is complete.
**********
Mrs. Turlaine's Lament
"If only things were different,"
Heard the word so many times.
It isn't what we're saying
But the thoughts we leave behind.
We dare not speak about it,
For one word would make it real,
Betray the frigid passion
That was long since lost or killed.
Though in hollowness it echoes,
It can never be forgot,
The vows can't be forsaken
And forgiveness can't be bought.
**********
My Philosophy
"What is the point of life," I said,
"We only live until we're dead,
And spend our time in stress and strain
To wind up in a grassy plain.
I wonder what it's about,
Consuming time with fear and doubt.
It seems there's nothing much to life
But learning how to waste your time.
He who is and does and has
Gains nothing but a plot of grass;
His final plot of earth's as small
As he who never did at all."
And so, I sat to think things out,
So I would know what life's about.
I thought and thought and strained my brain,
Until at last the answer came.
It's not at all like songs we sing;
Life's not about a fucking thing.
**********
My Secret Place
Along the river's quiet scene,
With summer grasses growing green,
I lay me down to peaceful rest
Upon the ground that Nature blessed.
I gaze up to the heavens, blue,
Between the branches, strong and true.
Leaves shimmer in the sultry breeze,
As I lie silent 'neath the trees,
Listening to the river's song
As it goes rolling, endless on,
To mingle with the sparrow's call
Of peace and goodwill to us all.
I can feel the damp, sun-warmed earth
Beneath me, as it's giving birth
To shoots of green with blossomed lace,
In my own secret, private place.
I think of this and breathe a sigh;
I know my place will never die.
It lies within a memory;
A secret place for only me.
**********
Oh, Sad and Lonely Days
Oh, sad and lonely days
O'er spent in melancholy,
Wish I now had seen your glory.
Spent less time in seeing sorrows,
Waiting for the grand tomorrows
That never seemed to come.
**********
Poison Me
Poison me; tell me the venom in your prayer.
Let the radio and TV blare
'Til I can't think and I don't care.
Poison me; fill me with your drugs and wine.
Let me feel like I'm divine,
Then shred my soul and lose my mind.
Poison me; Lord don'
t ever let me dare
To feel an ounce of passion, swear.
Just take my love and strip it bare.
Poison me; I can't feel it anymore.
Poison me; keep me down here on the floor,
Breathing lies with no excuse,
Destroying everything that's loose.
Carry on, break every truce.
Poison me; I feel the life that's flowing out.
I've lost all reasoning and doubt;
Just give me wings; let me cry out
And poison me.
**********
Runaway
You give yourself to anyone who asks
And smile when they say you're hot.
You try to pretend that you're loved,
But you know that you're not.
What do you have to have in this world
To deserve a few good feelings?
Nothing is given away anymore,
So be quiet and stare at the ceiling.
Do you find the answers anywhere
When you're screaming out the questions?
In the middle of the darkest night
Does the misery ever lessen?
You give yourself to anyone who smiles.
I watch you go, piece by piece,
In the arms of each new lover
But you try to hide your grief.
What would it take to save you tonight;
To cast away all of the stones?
What would it take just to hold you together
When you're already peeled to the bones?
Do you find the answers anywhere
When you're screaming out the questions?
Where are the dreams; where are the hopes;
Where's the love that could bring you redeeming?
**********
Secrets
From the time of our conception
To the hour of our defeat,
We have spent a lifetime hoarding