Table of Contents
By the Same Author
Title Page
Copyright Page
Dedication
Chapter 1 Blame the Mouse!
Chapter 2 This House isn't Big Enough for Both of Us!
Chapter 3 A Friend of My Own
SNOW DOG
SPACE RACE
THE MONSTER CRISP-GUZZLER
ZEUS ON THE LOOSE!
Jack Slater MONSTER INVESTIGATOR
There it sat, on the kitchen table. It was perfect! It was stupendous! It was the best, the most wonderful, the most rumptious, the most delectably delicious birthday cake Mrs Bailey had ever made.
"I'm brilliant!" smiled Mrs Bailey.
"I was the one who took it out of the oven," said Mr Bailey. "That's where all the skill was needed!"
When the cake had cooled, Mrs Bailey poured tons of chocolate icing all over it.
"Oh, Jack! Look at that!" Matthew breathed. "I bet. . . I bet, if I had a teeny-tiny itsy-bitsy little bit, no one would ever know!"
Uh-oh! I thought. Uh-oh! And my whiskers started to quiver – a sure sign of TROUBLE!
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Also by Malorie Blackman:
SPACE RACE
SNOW DOG
THE MONSTER CRISP-GUZZLER
OPERATION GADGETMAN!
CLOUD BUSTING
WHIZZIWIG AND WHIZZIWIG RETURNS
www.malorieblackman.co.uk
www.myspace.com/malorieblackman
Jack Sweettooth
MALORIE BLACKMAN
Illustrated by Patrice Aggs
This eBook is copyright material and must not be copied, reproduced, transferred, distributed, leased, licensed or publicly performed or used in any way except as specifically permitted in writing by the publishers, as allowed under the terms and conditions under which it was purchased or as strictly permitted by applicable copyright law. Any unauthorised distribution or use of this text may be a direct infringement of the author's and publisher's rights and those responsible may be liable in law accordingly.
ISBN 9781407046785
Version 1.0
www.randomhouse.co.uk
JACK SWEETTOOTH
A YOUNG CORGI BOOK
ISBN: 9781407046785
Version 1.0
First published in Great Britain by Viking
an imprint of Penguin Books Ltd.
Viking edition published 1995
Puffin Books edition published 1997
Young Corgi edition published 2008
3 5 7 9 10 8 6 4 2
Copyright © Oneta Malorie Blackman, 1995
Illustrations copyright © Patrice Aggs, 1995
The right of Malorie Blackman and Patrice Aggs to be identified as the author and illustrator of this work has been asserted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.
This electronic book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, resold, hired out, or otherwise circulated without the publisher's prior consent in any form other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser
Set in Palatino
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A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.
For Neil with love
And for my sister, Wendy
1
Blame the Mouse!
Eight o'clock
Hi! I'm Jackson Winstanley Sweettooth the seventy-third – or Jack for short – at your service!
I live with Mr Bailey, Mrs Bailey, Matthew and Shani, in this house.
Mr Bailey likes me. "As long as he doesn't run over my feet!"
Shani is very fond of me. "Jack is great fun!"
Matthew loves me. "Jack is my best friend."
Mrs Bailey . . . isn't too keen! "Keep that smelly, horrible creature away from me!"
Never mind! It's Shani's birthday today and I intend to be extra-super-duper helpful. I shall prove to Mrs Bailey that she's all wrong about me!
Eight fifteen
"AARRGH! No one move. No one breathe! The ruby has fallen out of my eternity ring. AARRGH!" shrieked Mrs Bailey.
"I've been telling you for ages to go and get your ring fixed, dear," sighed Mr Bailey.
Mrs Bailey fell to her knees and started sweeping her hands back and forth over the grey carpet.
"Come on, you lot! No breakfast until my ruby is found!"
"But that could take ages," said Matthew, his stomach rumbling.
"Then the sooner you start helping, the sooner we can all eat," said Mrs Bailey.
Matthew walked over to me. "Come on, Jack," he whispered. "If anyone can find Mum's ruby, you can."
He let me out of my cage and put me on the carpet. Here was my chance to shine! This was my chance to show Mrs Bailey that I, Jackson Winstanley Sweettooth the seventy-third, could be useful!
I was soon on the job! Sniffing here and searching there and keeping my eyes peeled. I ran everywhere – over the videos and under the sofa and between the books on the floor, until . . .
"Eeek! Who let that nasty, disgusting creature out of its cage?" screamed Mrs Bailey.
"I thought Jack could help us," said Matthew.
"Help us! HELP US! I bet that. . . that. . . mouse has swallowed my ruby by now!" said Mrs Bailey.
"But, Mum – " Shani protested.
"Jack wouldn't do that," said Matthew.
"Dear, I really think –" began Mr Bailey.
But Mrs Bailey wasn't having any of it.
"Matthew, put that animal back in its cage. We're all going round to the vet's,"
said Mrs Bailey. "I just know that rodent has eaten my ruby!"
So we all left the house and got into the car and off we went to the vet's.
Eight forty-five
"Has Jack had any breakfast this morning?" The vet scratched her head.
"None of us has had any breakfast this morning," muttered Mr Bailey.
Mrs Bailey elbowed her husband in the ribs.
"No," said Matthew, "Jack hasn't eaten anything since yesterday evening."
"Good. That makes it easier. If Jack has swallowed the ruby from your mum's eternity ring it will show up nicely on the X-rays," said the vet.
I was put under a huge machine which clanged and rumbled and whirled. There was a sudden loud buzzing sound, but it didn't hurt at all – and then it was all over.
Five minutes later, the vet came out into the waiting-room, where we were all sitting. Guess what?
"Sorry, Mrs Bailey," said the vet. "I don't know where your ruby is, but it's not in Jack's stomach."
Huh! I could've told you that! I thought.
So we all drove home again.
Nine fifteen
"I guess my ruby has gone for good," Mrs Bailey sighed unhappily once we were home.
"Never mind, dear," said Mr Bailey, giving her a hug. "I'm sure it will turn up."
"Mum, what about my birthday party?" said Shani. "All my friends will be here at three."
"Never mind your birthday party! What about breakfast?" said Matthew.
"OK! OK!" said Mr Bailey. "I'll make breakfast. You two go and make your beds and tidy your rooms until I call you."
Off went Matthew, huffing and puffing and mumbling about his breakfast. I wa
s pretty hungry myself!
Mr Bailey made bacon and beans on toast for breakfast and Matthew sneaked me some. It was most excellently tasty!
After breakfast, Mrs Bailey started making Shani's birthday cake.
Meanwhile Shani and Matthew made all kinds of sandwiches: banana and bacon, ham and mustard, cheese and raspberry jam, strawberries and sugar, egg and pickle. Then they put lots of different kinds of cakes and mini Swiss rolls and pizza slices on lots of different-sized plates.
And I watched the whole thing from Matthew's shirt pocket. It all looked yumptious! Matthew even managed to slip me a bit of a strawberry and sugar sandwich. Scrumptious!
Eleven o'clock
"Come on then, Shani, Matthew. Time to go to the hairdressers," said Mrs Bailey. She turned to her husband. "Paul, can you keep an eye on the birthday cake and take it out of the oven when it's cooked?"
"Of course, dear," smiled Mr Bailey. He hates going to the hairdressers!
"Shani, you can have your hair styled, and, Matthew, you can have yours cut," said Mrs Bailey.
So off we went.
When we reached the hairdressing salon, it was jam-packed solid full of people. Almost every sink had someone's head leant backwards over it. Each hairdryer had someone sitting under it. We had to wait a while, but then Shani was taken off by one hairdresser and Matthew was led away by another. It wasn't too bad, until . . .
A woman under a hairdryer started the commotion.
"EEEK! A MOUSE!" she screamed. "AARRGH! HELP!"
The man beside her flung his newspaper in the air and leaped out of his chair. But he forgot that the hairdryer was still over his head. His head hit the inside of the hairdryer with a loud THWACK! Then the man slid back down into his seat. I think he knocked himself out.
Meanwhile, a man wearing perm rods leaped on to his chair, yelling, "A MOUSE! A MOUSE!"
By this time, all the other grown-ups were joining in. They were dashing here, there and everywhere. They fell over each other, yelling and screaming. Some leaped over chairs in their hurry to get out of the salon. One woman fainted and dropped to the floor like a stone.
It was worse than sports day at Shani and Matthew's school!
Another woman ran into the loo and locked the door, screaming, "Call the police! Call an ambulance! Call my husband! AARRGH! A MOUSE!"
Shani came rushing over. "Matthew, you idiot! You didn't let Jack go, did you?"
But before Matthew could answer, Mrs Bailey appeared to stand in front of Shani and Matthew, her hands folded across her chest. Lightning bolts flashed from her eyes.
"I want a few words with you, Matthew!" she said stonily.
Twelve o'clock
"I didn't do it, Mum," Matthew said immediately. "Honest I didn't."
"Why did you let that dreadful mouse loose?" Mrs Bailey asked. "That wasn't very funny."
"Mum, I didn't –" Matthew started.
"Of all the daft, pea-brained –" began Mrs Bailey.
"But, Mum, it couldn't have been Jack," Matthew said. "Jack's in –"
"Not another word," Mrs Bailey interrupted.
"Oh dear! I'm so sorry, Mrs Bailey. I really must apologize." One of the hairdressers came running up.
Mrs Bailey looked surprised. "Apologize? For what, Sam?"
Sam hopped from foot to foot, looking very embarrassed. "Er . . . it's just that
... all week they've been knocking down that old cinema a few doors down. And the place was infested with hundreds of mice. They've been running through all the shops in the high street. I'm sorry if they scared you. We are trying our best to get rid of them."
"Mice! You mean this salon is full of mice?" Mrs Bailey stared.
"That's what I was trying to tell you, Mum," said Matthew. "It couldn't have been Jack. Jack is still in my pocket. See!"
"Oh!" said Mrs Bailey. "Matthew, I'm sorry, I didn't let you explain."
And then Mrs Bailey gave me a really strange look.
We stayed in the hairdressers until Shani had had her hair styled and Matthew had got his hair cut.
Then Mrs Bailey drove us home. And I didn't see a single mouse the entire time. What a shame! I would've liked to say hello to some of my cousins!
One fifteen
There it sat, on the kitchen table. It was perfect! It was stupendous! It was the best, the most wonderful, the most rumptious, the most delectably delicious birthday cake Mrs Bailey had ever made.
"I'm brilliant!" smiled Mrs Bailey.
"I was the one who took it out of the oven," said Mr Bailey. "That's where all the skill was needed!"
When the cake had cooled, Mrs Bailey poured tons of chocolate icing all over it.
"Oh, Jack! Look at that!" Matthew breathed. "I bet... I bet, if I had a teeny-tiny, itsy-bitsy little bit, no one would ever know!"
Uh-oh! I thought. Uh-oh! And my whiskers started to quiver – a sure sign of TROUBLE!
Two o'clock
"Mum! MUM! Look at this!" Shani yelled from the kitchen.
We all came running.
"Look!" Shani pointed to her birthday cake. And there, in the side of it, was a hole . . .
"Matthew, have you been letting that repulsive, revolting rodent nibble at your sister's cake?" Mrs Bailey glared at me with beady eyes.
I went hot – from the end of my tail to the tips of my whiskers.
"I'm waiting, Matthew," said Mrs Bailey.
"I. . . I. . ." Matthew spluttered.
And as Mrs Bailey continued to scowl at me, I could feel myself getting hotter and hotter.
"Wait a minute, Mum," said Shani. She prodded at the hole in the cake with her fork. "There's a whole lot more missing from this cake than just a hole! And someone's tried to disguise it by smearing over the chocolate icing to cover it up!"
Shani prodded the cake from the top, as well as the side. "There's a whole slice gone!" she said.
Mrs Bailey turned to Matthew. "As far
as I know, mice can't cut slices out of birthday cakes!" she said.
"I. . . I. . ." Matthew stammered.
"You greedy, toad-faced gannet!" Shani pouted. "It was you who cut a slice out of my birthday cake. And there was Mum blaming poor Jack!"
"Matthew? Did you take some of your sister's cake?" asked Mrs Bailey.
"Yes, Mum." Matthew hung his head.
I glanced up at Mrs Bailey. There! You see! I didn't do it! I thought.
And Mrs Bailey watched me, a strange expression on her face.
Two thirty
Matthew's Mum and Dad discussed whether or not Matthew should be allowed at his sister's party.
"It's up to you, Shani," they decided.
"Oh, all right then. You can come, Matthew. But if you take so much as a crumb off this table before my party starts ..."
"Thanks, Shani!" Matthew grinned gratefully.
"I mean it, Matthew!"
"I won't. I promise," Matthew said quickly.
Hmm!" said Mr Bailey.
"Hmm!" said Mrs Bailey. "Hmm!" said Shani. "You'd better not!"
Still in disgrace, Matthew was sent to wash his hands and face before the party.
"Oh dear!" Matthew sighed to me. "I shouldn't have done it, but I couldn't resist it! That cake looked so tempting!"
I burrowed down into Matthew's shirt pocket. I'd had enough of being blamed for everything for one day!
Matthew closed the bathroom door. He fished me out of his pocket and let me run over the bathroom floor, the way he always does.
"It wasn't my fault," Matthew muttered. "That cake was calling to me, teasing me."
I ran back and forth and up and down, stretching my legs.
And then I saw a strange thing. A gleaming, glinting, strange thing, winking at me from the tiny space between the bath-tub and the bathroom cupboard. I nudged my nose closer to it and there it was! Mrs Bailey's ruby!
I squeezed myself into the teeny-tiny space and started to nose out the ruby.
"What are you up to, Jack?" a
sked Matthew.
"Squeeek!" I said. "Squeeeek!"
And I carried on pushing at the ruby with my nose until it was out in the open.
"Squeeeeek!" I said.
Matthew picked me up and put me back in his shirt pocket. He bent over to see what I'd been doing. Then he saw it.
His mum's gleaming, glinting ruby. He snatched it up.
"Mum! MUM!" Matthew shouted.
Mrs Bailey came running. So did Shani and Mr Bailey.
"What is it? What's the matter?" asked Mrs Bailey.
"Here it is! Your ruby! Here it is!" Matthew jumped up and down.
"Well done, Matthew!" Mrs Bailey kissed Matthew's cheek.
Matthew looked at his mum. Then he took me out of his pocket "I... I didn't do it, Mum," said Matthew. "Jack found it. He pushed it out from between the cupboard and the bath-tub."
Mrs Bailey gave me another strange look. A long, slow, very strange look. Then she did something she'd never done before. Very slowly, very carefully, she picked me up and sat me in the palm of her hand.
"Thank you, Jack," smiled Mrs Bailey, using my proper name for the first time ever. "I've blamed you for everything that went wrong today. I think I've always been too hard on you and I'm really sorry. I'll try to make it up to you."
And she did!
Three o'clock
I got some of everything from Shani's birthday party – and Mrs Bailey made me my very own birthday cake, even though it wasn't my birthday.
Double rumptious-yumptious-scrumptious!
It's so nice to be appreciated!
2
This House isn't Big Enough for Both of Us!
Beauregard Battersby-Bunge
The sun was shining, birds were singing, the sky was a deep blue with not a single cloud to spoil the view. We were all out in the garden. Mr and Mrs Bailey sat on the garden bench, kissing and cuddling and canoodling – yuk! Shani sat on the swing reading her latest book and Matthew sat on the grass playing with one of those pocket video games. I ran back and forth and up and down on the grass by Matthew's feet, just enjoying myself. I stopped to look up at the sky. It was such a wonderfully beautiful day.