This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and plot are all fictitious. Any similarity to other real or fictional people, places, events, or anything else is coincidental.
Chapter 1
When Alex left I followed. I had to. Even though we had argued the night before about the decision he had made he was still the man I loved and I wasn’t going to let him go out there alone. Some days I wish I had, because this world isn’t an easy place to live, but I can understand why he was getting antsy. He’d always felt our home was too easy to live in. Occasionally I had the same feeling, although I know it was only that way because a lot of people did a lot of hard work to make certain that it was simple for those of us who followed. That’s something I learned during history, which was one of the many classes he skived. It didn’t matter how often we talked about the choices he made - he said that our lives down there were pointless and I… well, I did my best to find him a reason. Unfortunately it didn’t happen.
The lessons Alex thought of as nothing more than propaganda taught me what to expect when we were out there. Or, at least, some of what to expect. Nukes were dangerous and they changed the world that had once existed into a wasteland. Some had survived it, thanks to whoever it was deciding that building underground cities was a good idea, while everyone else had lost their lives. My family had been in Fifth City ever since the day the nukes hit. We were lucky enough to be chosen to take shelter there during the war. What we hadn't thought of was that Fifth City wasn't built just as a refuge. It was a fully self-sufficient city meant for us to rebuild our own civilization in. No one was supposed to leave.
I know my family never approved of Alex. They were certain that he was going to change my life for the worst. Maybe they were right.
Now we live together in the wasteland of an old world, a place where neither of us can sleep at the same time in case someone or something comes upon us, but at least we are together. Even though I probably shouldn’t feel the way I do that is something I will always be grateful for. Alex still means so much to me. For a long time I was angry with him, but then he nearly died and I remembered why I ‘threw away’ my entire life to be with him. That’s how Mum described it when I went back to Fifth City, knowing it was the only place I’d be able to get the supplies we needed, and I hated every moment of being away from him. Maybe I’m not living the life she envisioned for me. Maybe I’m not living the life I envisioned for me. As I’m with him none of that really matters.
I love him. I walked away from Fifth City because of that and I’ve never regretted the choice that I made. Our relationship is easier out here. We argue less than we did there because Alex is truly happy. Everyone who knew him thought he was weird. When I first met him, before we fell in love, I thought he was weird too. But now I’ve come to understand him in a way I never could if he forced himself to stay down there. He’s one of those people who needs to be traveling and staying in Fifth City was stifling him. Out here he’s like a changed person, and he seems to love me more than he ever did before escaping with him.
It didn't matter what I said. He believed that I would stay in Fifth City when he left, as I loved safety more than I loved him. I proved him wrong.
Ever since the first day I’ve kept a journal. It holds all of my experiences, so that one day someone might find it and learn from it. That is something I picked up from history class, as we read journals that people had kept from before the war, during the war, and the early years of the cities. We even had a couple written by other people who explored the wasteland, which was how I knew what to expect. I’m writing this today because I feel the need to. Doing something that reminds me of home helps on the days when I’m feeling at my lowest, when we’re running out of food again and I know we’re only a few days from the end. Fortunately he got lucky recently and found a cache that no one else seems to know existed, because many of them stick to the places that they know. It's little discoveries like that that keep us alive.
People who chose to come out here have made their own cities. The one we started at was once called Fairfield and it’s a name still used now. Someone found pictures of what it used to look like before and have stuck them in the local bar, so everyone can see. I don’t know why. Clinging to the past seems utterly pointless to me, yet we gather things from that time to be able to survive. One of the women we go to collects old jewelery, another collects china, and a third… well, she’s stranger than the others. She likes anything that we find to do with the occult and we’ll be going to her first this time as I managed to find her another Ouija board. It’s wrapped in fabric, because I refuse to touch those things with my bare hands. Even though I’m not certain I believe they do what she believes they do, they still make me feel uncomfortable.
Anyway, yeah, today we should be leaving for Hammond, with the plan being to move on in the morning. Alex has got wanderlust again and wants to see somewhere new, so that’s exactly what we’ll be doing, again. We’ll have to hunt for a new town, find new people to barter with, but it’s part of the fun. Like I said this may not be the life I envision for myself yet I’m still glad I came out here with him because this life is so much better than living in Fifth City ever could be.