Zombies Don’t Read:
25 YA Short Stories
By Rusty Fischer, author of Zombies Don’t Cry
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Zombies Don’t Read
Rusty Fischer
Copyright 2013 by Rusty Fischer
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This is a work of fiction. All of the names, characters, places and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or, if real, are used fictitiously.
Cover credit: © James Thew – Fotolia.com
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Author’s Note
The following is a collection of 25 FREE living dead short stories. Any errors, typos, grammar or spelling issues are completely the fault of the zombies. (They’re not very patient with the editorial process!) Anyway, I hope you can overlook any minor errors you may find; enjoy!
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Table of Contents
Introduction
Story # 1: Zombies Don’t Kiss & Tell
Story # 2: Zombies Don’t Sleep
Story # 3: Zombies Don’t Study
Story # 4: Zombies Don’t Swim
Story # 5: Zombies Don’t Carve
Story # 6: Zombies Don’t Dance
Story # 7: The Zombie’s Halloween Costume
Story # 8: Zombies Don’t Eat Cotton Candy
Story # 9: Zombies Don’t Write Valentines
Story # 10: Zombie Eve
Story # 11: Zombies Don’t Need Bodyguards
Story # 12: Zombie Thanksgiving
Story # 13: Zombies Don’t Eat Popcorn
Story # 14: Zombies Hate Zombie Movies
Story # 15: Zombies Don’t Pucker
Story # 16: Perfect Attendance
Story # 17: Skipping Zombie School
Story # 18: Ditching Detention
Story # 19: The Aftermath
Story # 20: Swarmed
Story # 21: Born Lucky
Story # 22: Home for Christmas
Story # 23: Jingle Brains
Story # 24: Late
Story # 25: Zombie Next Year
About the Author: Rusty Fischer
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Introduction
What could be better than five free zombie stories?
What could be more awesome than 10 free stories of the living dead?
What could be cooler than 15 tales of leg shuffling walkers?
Would 20 stories be cooler? How about… 25?!?! That’s right, Zombies Don’t Read contains not five, not 10, not 15, not even 20… but 25 FREE zombie stories, yours for the taking.
In our first story, Zombies Don’t Kiss & Tell, one lonely young man discovers that his blind date is… a zombie. What’s more, he finds out he’s totally into it!
In Story # 2, Zombies Don’t Sleep, a high school senior with insomnia discovers that there’s a zombie hanging out at her local Laundromat. She also finds out that he’s way cooler than the mere mortals at her school.
Our third story, Zombies Don’t Study, finds one young nerd surrounded by three comely hotties; zombie hotties, that is. What happens in study hall stays in study hall!
Zombies Don’t Swim, our fourth story, tells the curious tale of what happens when zombies are allowed to do manual labor around the houses of mere mortals. Particularly, what happens when they clean the pools of certain hotties who have nothing better to do over spring break than watch them do it!
And our fifth story, Zombies Don’t Carve, is a Christmas story about what happens when a human girl brings her zombie boyfriend to meet the parents for dinner.
In story # 6, Zombies Don’t Dance, prom is here once again… zombie style! The last thing Rex ever wanted to do was break Cara’s heart. That’s why he’s canceling prom… at the last minute. But will Cara ever understand that, after being a zombie longer than he’d care to remember, Rex is simply tired of doing the chicken dance. And breaking human girls’ hearts?!?
We find out how zombies celebrate Halloween in our next story, The Zombie’s Halloween Costume. Why would a zombie wear a costume on Halloween when he’s got one built-in? Find out in this poignant tale about one zombie who finds freedom on the scariest day of the year!
Our eighth story, Zombies Don’t Eat Cotton Candy, takes place amid the blinking lights and competing smells of a traveling zombie-themed circus known as the “Cannibal Carnival.” All Alice wanted to do was find her brother. But when he shows up in the flyer for something called the “Cannibal Carnival,” she must set out on a cross-country odyssey to find him. Even if he is one of the living dead…
Story # 9 is a Valentine to you, dear reader! Once upon a time, Sarah and Brody dated. Now he's one of the living dead, and can't remember her name. Or... can he? When Brody asks Sarah to help him make a Valentine's Day card, she'll find out whether or not zombies can still remember what to do on February 14th!
Our tenth story takes place during the festive holiday season: zombie style! It’s Christmas Eve and the zombie known as “Scout” is doing her job: scouting out freshly dug graves for the rest of her zombie pals. But when she comes across a young kid guarding the nearest graveyard, the two strike up an unlikely friendship that turns into a bond only something like the holidays can forge.
In our eleventh story, Zombies Don’t Need Bodyguards, we discover why zombies don’t play fair, even when they’re your “friends.” Let’s face it: Rex Limburger, Jr. is a wimp. He knows it, the whole world knows it, especially the bullies. But today Rex stops being a wimp. Because today he’s brought… a bodyguard. A zombie bodyguard. And nothing will ever be the same. But not in the way Rex thinks…
In our twelfth story, it’s Thanksgiving and all Cassie wants to do is sit in her dorm room eating cheesy poofs and binge watching a Horror High marathon on HitFlix. That’s when Rex, one of the members of the Zombie Job Corps, shows up, wanting to clean her floor. With nothing better to do, Cassie helps him… and finds a friend for Thanksgiving break. And just in time, too, seeing as a zombie outbreak is starting...
Our thirteenth story, Zombies Don’t Eat Popcorn, finds us in one of the best – and worst – places to encounter a zombie: a movie theater! All Jerry wanted was a little popcorn to go with his zombie movie. Instead he got a zombie cashier! Find out what happens next in Zombies Don’t Eat Popcorn…
Story # 14 continues our zombie movie theme, I suppose making this a double feature. In Zombies Hate Zombie Movies, all Zed ever wanted was to be in a zombie movie. Turns out he finally got the chance; once he became an actual zombie! Find out what happens next in Zombies Hate Zombie Movies…
Our fifteenth story, Zombies Don’t Pucker, finds us back in the world of zombies, carnies and fairgrounds. When two hapless bloggers make the scoop of the year -- that zombies can actually talk!!! -- they get the surprise of their lives: being fed to the zombie to cover up the "evidence"! But Zed is one zombie who'd rather let the bloggers go to tell their tale, even if it means paying the ultimate price!
In story #16, Perfect Attendance, Principal Standish loves patrolling the halls of his beloved Catfish Cove High School, ensuring that all his students get to their classes on time so they can win the coveted Perfect Attendance award for the 10th year in a row. But when Standish finds a student roaming the hall, with gray skin and rotting teeth and… things… squirming in his hair, he finds himself face to face with a zombie.
In our seventeenth story, Skipping Zombie School, Autumn wasn’t ready for her oral report in World Cultures class, so she skipped school to watch the Zombie Janitor marathon at the Catfish Cove Cinemas, and there she sat. All afternoon, for six straight hours. And when she finally turned on her cell phone, the sad story spilled
out in texts: her entire school, lost, to a zombie outbreak. Leaving Autumn the only student at Zombie School…
In our eighteenth Story, Ditching Detention, Bonnie has gotten detention. Again. But the thought of sitting inside a stuffy old room for another hour of school, without being able to say a word, makes her physically ill. So does the boy who runs into her while she’s getting a drink of water, giving Bonnie a bloody lip. But it’s not just any boy, it’s a zombie. And to escape, she’s going to have to get through him… one way or another!
Story # 19 is called The Aftermath: Michelle has just escaped the zombie infestation at her high school. That’s the good news. The bad news is she has to stick around and be debriefed by every department of every branch of the US government. Oh, and the local reporters, of course. As she tells her story to one reporter, she gives him the scoop of his life. Make that, his afterlife!
In Swarmed, our twentieth story, Michelle is kicking practice goals on the soccer field after school when the first trucks -- big and bad -- show up. She hides behind a goal post, watching as soldiers stream out. As they stand behind Michelle’s school, glass breaks on the third floor and out poke bloody, human hands. “Zombies!” someone screams, and that’s when Michelle starts running. And she never. Really. Stops…
Born Lucky is our twenty-first story. In it, Mandy Nash is the first “Normal” (i.e. human) to invite Calvin anywhere since he became reanimated, one of the living dead. But what will he do when he finds out her invitation to the big St. Patrick’s Day party in town is just an elaborate ruse to get him to take her into the Z-Zone , a place where "Normals" are forbidden, and even zombies are in danger?
In our next story, Home for Christmas, it’s Christmas Eve but Tanner doesn’t know it yet. Nor does her buddy, Scrim. That’s because they’re both zombies; with no memories. Of anything. At all. Not of their past lives. Not of who they are… or were. Not even of Christmas. But that all changes when Tanner hears Christmas music for the first time. And nothing will ever be the same…
In Jingle Brains, Lacy and her boyfriend Grady have just been reanimated, turned into the living dead while putting up Christmas decorations in a thunderstorm. Now it’s Christmas Eve and all Lacy wants to do is get her man some fresh brains for the holidays. But what’s a girl to do when she comes home after an all-night quest to find that Grady’s already gotten brains aplenty, and eaten them all by himself?!?
Finally, we wrap up this collection with two back to back New Year’s Eve stories because, well, maybe it’s just me but there just aren’t enough zombie stories about NYE for my taste.
In Late, it’s New Year’s Eve and Jade Summers has only one thing on her mind as midnight approaches: kissing a zombie. Well, due respect, the zombie is her undead boyfriend, Calvin, even though he doesn’t remember her from Before. And it’s kind of illegal to kiss zombies, for obvious reasons. But that won’t stop Jade, who moves heaven and earth to reach Calvin – and his cold, undead lips – before midnight. Even if she is a little late…
In our last story – really, it’s the LAST one – Zombie Next Year, the Winter Wonderland Dance was supposed to be a chance to get outside after the zombie outbreaks that had been plaguing the Carolinas all holiday season. But the heavy guards and all the adult supervision in the world couldn’t stop the Great New Year’s Outbreak of 2019, and now Cara Brent is stuck inside the Nightshade Gym with a dozen other unfortunate kids, awaiting the inevitable. Or will she…
I hope you enjoy these 25 FREE zombie stories and that they don’t keep you up at night! But even if they do, you’ll have plenty of company because, after all… Zombies Don’t Sleep!!!
Or eat popcorn. Or study. Or kiss and tell. Or carve. Or eat cotton candy. Or like zombie movies. Or… well, you get the point.
Zombies may not be able to read, either, but YOU can, and you’re in luck, because these 25 FREE stories.
Start.
Right.
NOW!
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Story # 1:
Zombies Don’t Kiss & Tell