Nathan and Bill sat down in Nathan’s study, Nathan at his desk and Bill on the sofa by the door. Bill looked at the shelves that had once been teaming with books and were now mostly filled with family photos and a few select books. His curiosity getting the better of him, he asked, “That was some spring cleaning you did in here. Where’s the rest of your books?”
“In the garage.” Nathan replied as he pulled a spiral bound notebook from his desk drawer and began to write in it.
Bill watched for a moment, “You planning to go back to work any time soon?”
Nathan, persistent in his writing didn’t answer.”
“Hey, Earth to Nate.”
Nathan looked up, “Sorry, what did you say?”
“Have you talked to the school about going back to work?”
Nathan put his pen down, “Not yet. I was going to call today and talk with Henry about it.”
“You must be feeling pretty good then.”
“You know; I am feeling good. In fact, I haven’t felt this good since, well, before Kathleen got sick.”
“That’s great to hear.”
“Ya well, I know that Kathleen is doing well and I have a strong desire now to really help these kids find their way.”
“If there is anything I can do to help just let me know.” Bill said. “I just wanted check in on you and make sure you were doing alright.”
“Couldn’t be better. But thanks.”
Bill got up, “Ok then, I’ll swing by tomorrow then.” And putting his hands in his pockets, he left the study. The sound of his sneakers squeaked as he took steps across the hardwood floor. Moments later the front door opened and then closed. Nathan smiled and thought, “That’s a pretty good guy.” It felt good having someone keep an eye out for him.
He made a call to Henry Campbell, principal at the high school and was welcomed back whenever he was ready, weather full time or on a part time basis. The faculty and the student body looked forward to his return from what Henry said. Nathan decided that he would return to work on the following Monday and Henry happily agreed.
Then he called Helen to check on his children. She had asked if they could stay and finish the school year with them since they were finally settled and Nathan thought that it was probably best, although he missed them terribly. The house was empty without their laughter and the sounds of bare feet running through the halls. But he knew they were safe and well cared for and that put his mind at rest.
Over the next few days he listened to stories from three other students. The first was a junior named Jason. This young man maintained good grades, played baseball, and had just been accepted to a top university and yet was unable to gain the respect of his father. He said that his father basically told him he was lazy and wouldn’t amount to anything. Nathan listened and then gave his advice to sit down with his father and find out what his expectations were for Jason. When he had finished Jason asked Nathan to go with him since he felt that his father might be more likely to listen with his guidance counselor present. Nathan agreed and they went to his house.
Nathan had learned a lot from Nuncio and it was all coming into play with each student and each situation. He had not been put on the defensive although sometimes his own guilt or shame made him feel like he needed to defend his actions. And likewise he tried to not make others feel like he was coming down on them, and yet he was honest and firm in his input and responses.
As with the obstacles in the verity, he learned to remain calm and simply looked for a way through. His tone was never condescending or rude; he never blamed either parent or child and took the time to listen carefully to both as they talked. He was realizing that sometimes letting them talk it out, helped clarify each one’s position.
In this instance, Jason heard his father, Mr. Reynolds, say that he wasn’t doing all he could and because of that he wouldn’t live up to his potential. Mr. Reynolds clarified that he believed that Jason could get better grads and spend more time at the batting cages. “I just don’t want to see you struggle to take care of your family the way your mom and I have.” Mr. Reynolds stated. “Working for the city as a grounds keeper is fine but I think you can be so much more.”
Nathan got up and left the two of them to finish talking. He waited in the neatly detailed living room and soon Jason and his father came in and discussed the outcome of the conversation. Then thanked Nathan for taking the time to come over and help get this cleared up.
The second to visit was Patricia Kimball, a bigger girl with baggy camouflage cargo style pants and a lack sweatshirt two sizes too big with a silver skull and crossbones design and the words “Brand-X” in puffy pink ink. Although she seemed to be a happy, bubbly girl with plenty of charisma, she struggled with her weight and that carried over into her appearance. Nathan figured that all the negative attention she was receiving had her convinced that because of her size, she had nothing to offer anyone, which couldn’t be further from the truth.
She was fun to talk to and her bright blue eyes hadn’t yet been diminished by the constant bombardment of hateful comments from the other students. She displayed a wonderful smile that should have disarmed any scurrilous attacks. But, it didn’t. Her only defense was a quick wit and tough skin, that was wearing thin. “I try to be friendly to everyone and helpful too, I don’t know what else to do. I feel like no one will ever see past this,” she said motioning to her body, “and see me.”
Nathan’s heart broke as he sat and listened to her tell her story. He explained to her that she was specifically made by God for a very special purpose. “He took the time to make you perfect, not based on people’s expectations but rather his.”
“I just wish that people could be happy. Then maybe they wouldn’t be so mean.”
“What do you want to do with your life?” Nathan asked.
“I don’t know.” She said.
“Take a few days and think about it, then come back and let me know what you have come up with. Just do me a favor.”
“What’s that?”
“Find what you want, not what you think others want from you.”
She nodded thoughtfully, “Ok.”
“How do I find his purpose for me?” She asked.
“I pray.” Nathan said. “We could start there.”
“I don’t know how to pray.” She admitted.
“Prayer is a conversation between you and God.”
“You want me to pray to God; the all-knowing, all powerful God? Ya, no pressure.”
Nathan laughed. “Ya well, he’s also; all-loving, patient, forgiving and merciful.”
Nathan lowered his head and began, “Heavenly father, I thank you for introducing Patricia to me. You made her and you know her better than even she knows herself. Please show her the path that you have laid out for her and only her. In the name of Jesus Christ, I pray, Amen.”
Nathan lifted his face and saw that Patricia was wiping her face. “Are you ok?”
“What if I let him down?”
Nathan smiled softly, “You won’t. I believe in you and so does God.”
Patricia left that afternoon with a reenergized hope for the future. Her heart was light and carefree and slowly she began to imagine all the things that she could do with her life. The choices were endless and she could hardly keep up with the possibilities.
Then there was Thaddeus, a freshman whose average day, Nathan would find out, was anything but average. He wanted to talk with Nathan but he spoke with guarded words and a cautiousness that led Nathan to believe that there was more to his inquiries than the boy let on. He tried to get him to let down his guard but Thaddeus remained vague and distant. Nathan invited him into the living room and offered him a seat.
“Thaddeus, I want to help, I really do, but I can’t if you won’t trust me.”
“You can’t tell anyone what we talk about, can you?”
“Listen, I’m not your doctor or lawyer so I’m not
required by law to keep my mouth shut. However, as long as you aren’t going to hurt yourself or someone else I will. I give you my word.”
“I talked with Daniel and he said that I should see you. I’m scared and I don’t know what else to do.”
“What is it? You can tell me.”
Thaddeus looked around the living room and rubbed his hands together so hard that Nathan was sure he would rub the skin completely off soon. His face was much too hard for a teenager and the burden he carried was more than evident as it pressed his shoulders down. His pale skin, gaunt eyes and oily brown hair gave the appearance of a homeless person.
“I’m tired.” He said when he mustered up the courage.
Nathan looked intently at the boy, “Tired of what?”
“Taking care of everything.” He looked at Nathan trying to find a reason not to say any more. But he found nothing, so he continued. As the words came out, they gained momentum and before long he was unloading his entire load. “I wake up every day on my own; I get my brother, George, up and then my sister Alice. I make breakfast and lunches. I get George dressed and Alice too. George goes to the middle school so he rides the bus. But I walk Alice to daycare, drop her off, and try to get to school on time.”
His face began to flush at the thought of his daily activities. “After school I pick up Alice and we go home where George is usually watching t.v. I cook dinner and clean up then do my homework and go to bed just to do it all over again in the morning.” He sighed.
“Saturday I take George and Alice to do the shopping and to the bank to put in Mom’s check. That’s pretty cool though, they love riding the buses around town.” A slight smile appeared, and then disappeared. “Then back to the house to do laundry and mow the grass and clean the house. George helps sometimes but Alice just gets in the way and usually makes more mess than I start with, so I just let them watch t.v.”
Nathan sat there open mouthed as he listened. When Thaddeus finished Nathan took a deep breath and thought for a few minutes. He saw the anxiety level rising in the boy’s face as he tried to think of what to say. When he gathered his thoughts he asked, “So where are your parents?”
“Mom’s sick. She wants to help but…” His eyes teared up and he took a deep breath and exhaled, “She’s an alcoholic.”
“Ok,” Nathan thought again, letting that one sink in, but this time he made him wait only a few seconds. “And your father?”
“He left about a year ago. That’s why Mom started drinking. She doesn’t know what else to do.”
And where do you get money to shop? You said you put your mother’s check in the bank. Is she still working?”
“No.” He lowered his face.
“Welfare?”
Thaddeus shook his head. “No. Dad sends what he can. But…” the words fought not to come out. Thaddeus struggled to speak. “I only take stuff that people won’t miss.”
“Ok, I see.” Nathan said leaning his elbows on his knees. He was tormented that this boy was put in such a situation like this.
“Really.” He said lifting his head and looking at Nathan. “I don’t want to do it, but we just don’t have food sometimes. Mom spends money on liquor and I do what I can with the rest. Then on the weekends I go to the construction sites and take things I can hock, stuff that the workers leave behind or extra supplies. They throw away so much; I figure they must have extra. I know it’s wrong, and I’m sorry.”
Nathan sat there trying to take it all in while putting himself in Thaddeus’ place and wondering if he would have done anything different but he couldn’t. He wondered how Nuncio would have responded to this.
“Thaddeus, I am so sorry that you have to deal with all of this. What is it exactly, that you want me to do?”
The uncertainty and anxiety lessened in his face at the sound of these words. “I’m not sure. I’m scared that I won’t be able to keep this up until Mom gets better. I’m scared that DCS will come in and take us away. I’m scared that we won’t have food or electricity.”
Nathan had no illusions about the reach of the Department of Child Services. As a guidance counselor he had witnessed them take kids from abusive homes and put them in foster care that sometimes was even worse than where they came from. He saw how they abided to the law no matter if it benefited the kids or not. He was sure that at one time these people wanted to truly help but in time became numb to real life and common sense. He knew that this was a reasonable cause for fear.
“Do you have enough food for the week?” He asked Thaddeus.
“Ya. I think so.”
“Good. Now, I want to help you but I need you to understand that I might need some help. If it’s alright I would like to talk to a friend of mine and see what we can get set up. Is that ok?”
“You said you wouldn’t tell anyone. You gave me your word.”
“I know and that’s why I’m asking. I don’t want the wrong people to know about this, so I want to talk to a friend and see what we can do.”
“Fine!” Thaddeus stood up and began to leave. “I never should have trusted you.”
“Wait a minute.” Nathan said stepping in front of him. “You don’t want me to ask for help because you don’t trust anyone right now. I get it. I’ll see what I can do.”
“You mean it?”
“Absolutely” Nathan said placing his hand on the boy’s shoulder. “I gave you my word. You can trust me.”
“Thanks.”
The next morning Nathan got in his car, and pulled out of the garage. Early rising sun gleamed off of the silver hood of the sedan and whitewashed the windshield from the garage’s dusty environment. “I need to clean these windows,” he thought to himself. He sprayed washer fluid as the wipers smeared the wet dust and then wiped it away.
He drove to the New Covenant Church and parked in front on the street. A simple white sign with interchangeable letters displayed service times and a simple message; God wants full custody of you, not just weekend visitation. Nathan smiled at the simplicity of the message.
He had driven by this building on countless occasions but never paid it much attention. The only time he had even been here was to help Bill clean once before. But today, as he stood on the front steps and looked at the large white doors he felt a bit dazed. He was at the door to the House of God, and he found himself with a growing reverence that he was unaccustomed to. He reached for the door handle and pulled. The large door swung open and he stepped over the threshold.
Bill looked up from his pulpit as the fresh air filled the sanctuary and blew his notes out of his hand. Nathan walked up to the front and laughed as Bill gathered the pages from the burgundy carpet but stopped when he began to look around. The church was neat and simple. Wooden pews and small light sconces adorned the walls. A large multi-tier chandelier hung from the middle of the ceiling clad with large wooden beams.
The pulpit was a basic rectangular structure made of what looked like oak, with small trim pieces around the top and an embossed cross on the front. Behind it were two rows of wooden pews for choir members, and a large stained glass window at the back wall. The bright white walls gave a disinfected feel to the room as if to show by comparison, the purity of this place and the filth of the world just outside the doors.
Bill stood up, papers in hand. “Hey.” He shuffled the pages back into order. “What’s up?”
“I have a problem… no, I have a question first, I’m not sure if it’s a problem yet.”
“And you came to me?” Bills words bursting with contempt, as he stepped around the pulpit, “I thought you had all the answers now.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It seems to me that you have answers for everyone in town now, since you had your revelation.”
“Now just wait a minute Bill, I don’t know what’s got you all ticked off but I’m sorry if I have done something wrong or stepped on y
our toes because I didn’t mean too.”
“What’s your question?”
“It can wait. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“I’m not buying it. Talk to me. I thought we were friends.”
Bill took a seat in the pew and took a bible from the back of the one in front of him. He flipped it open, feathered the pages and shut it again. “Why you?”
Nathan took a seat across the aisle. “Why me, what?”
“Why did you get to go? I have devoted my life to serving God and this community and you get a glimpse of heaven. I know it sounds childish and stupid but… what makes you so special.”
“I have no idea.” Nathan said. “I think someone like you might have known better what to say and do. I just looked like I was lost. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t trade it for anything, but I have to admit, it didn’t make much sense to me either.”
“And now it does?”
“Not completely, but I believe that God has a plan and he knows what he’s doing. I wish that more people could see what I saw. I’ve seen some Christians that believe in God and Jesus and Heaven and Hell but they act like their faith is more hope than actual knowing.”
Bill faced Nathan, “What do you mean?”
“Well, it’s like a traffic light. You sit at a red light for a while, you think that perhaps you can sneak through, and you hope you won’t get caught. But if there is a cop sitting beside you, you wouldn’t even consider it. I think that some people are doing their best to do right, but, times get hard and things happen and they get off track trying to make it through today.” Nathan stood up and felt his heart pump harder as his words became more enthusiastic. “But if they experienced what I did then they might realize that getting through today is trivial compared to tomorrow, because even though we are promised tomorrow, we aren’t promised that it’ll be here. And if it’s not here then where will it be?”
Bill was obviously a little uncomfortable with what Nathan said, not because he was wrong, but because he was right. For a moment he reflected on his own life and the times that he chose the easy path over the right path. He felt the conviction of Nathan’s words as if he heard them in his own voice. “Wow! I need you to speak at church on Sunday.”
“Thanks, but no. That my friend; is all you. I don’t do public speaking.”
“I apologize. I have no right to question the will of God or to say that I deserve anything more than anyone else, including you. But I have to say, you got me pretty fired up. I needed that. Thanks.”
“No problem.” Nathan sat back down and took a deep breath. “Actually Bill, I needed to hear it too.”
They sat there in the gravity of Nathan’s rant before Bill finally asked. “So what did you need?”
“I’m sorry?” Nathan replied.
“When you came in you said you had a question.”
“Oh ya. Now I can’t go into detail so I’ll try to keep it simple.” He scratched his head. “Where can I get some money to help a family?”
“We have a little money in our mission fund. But I’ll need to know what it’s used for. The church expects me to be accountable for how I use its money.”
“Also, is there an AA meeting around here somewhere?”
“No, but a couple of people in the church have wanted to do something like that. I think I can ask Chris Barr if he can help. He has one at his church in River View.”
“What else?”
“I need some volunteers to help me keep an eye on some friends for a few weeks. Two or three nights a week and only for a few hours is all I’ll need.”
“What have you gotten yourself into?”
“I can’t say right now, but I really need your help.”
Bill sat quietly and bowed his head. Nathan could see that he was asking for help in his decision. Bill raised his head and said. “Ok, but when it’s over I’ll need to know but for now I’ll trust your discretion.”
“Thank you. Now, what about a rehab center?”
“There’s one not far from here in Montrose, called Rising Sun Rehabilitation. You can look them up online.”
“Ok, well I think that’s all for now. I need to get some things arranged but I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Yes you will. I won’t promise that it’ll be here but…”
Nathan smiled at the statement and shook hands. Then he left to get started on this new challenge. First he went home and found Rising Sun on the web. It seemed to be just what Thaddeus’ mother would need, until he saw that it was three thousand dollars for the twenty-eight-day program. So he got back in his car and went to Montrose.
He met Adel Little, a stern looking woman with a pencil thin pair of lips and a bun of hair pulled so tight he though she was restricted from even blinking. She didn’t give the impression of a flexible negotiator, but Nathan laid his proposal out in detail. Take in this patient at no charge and if she recovers, even for a brief time, we will recommend all of the students and family members in town that need rehab, come here. As she listened to Nathan talk, she showed no emotion other than annoyance at a fly buzzing around her coffee cup that she subsequently shoed away twice before crushing it under a rolled up newspaper.
When Nathan finished the woman pulled a pamphlet from her desk and wrote on the back of it. “Here is my personal number. Call me when you are ready to bring her by and I will get it arranged.”
“Thank you Mrs. Little.” He said with utter surprise.
She raised an eyebrow. It’s Ms. Little.”
“Of course it is. Thank you.”
Nathan drove to Thaddeus’ house and waited for him to arrive. While he sat there he whispered a prayer thanking God for things working out the way they were. He knew this was more than coincidence and he also knew that he wasn’t so persuasive as to get Ms. Little to bend so easy.
Thaddeus saw Nathan’s car and walked up. Nathan was reading the pamphlet for Rising Sun when Thaddeus tapped on the window. “Mr. Foster? Is everything alright?”
“Yes it is. Is your mom home?”
“I think so.” He replied stepping back so Nathan could exit his car.
“Good, I’d like to talk with you both.”
They went in and Thaddeus went into his mother’s bed room. There was some commotion and soft arguing but eventually they both immerged and took seats in the living room. She reached for a glass on the end table by the sofa with what seemed to be whiskey or bourbon of something.
“Ma’am, would you please hold up on that for a few minutes.”
“Her name is Carol.” Thaddeus said.
She glared at him and set the glass back down. Nathan explained that he had heard about what was going on and how she had been at the short end of the stick. He sympathized with her and commiserated at the situation that they were all in. He explained the plan to get her into rehab and have people from the church come by to help out some.
He explained that he would be overseeing everything and giving her updates. He tried not to assign blame but the guilt in her surfaced anyway. She tried to defend her actions, but when she realized that it wasn’t getting her anywhere she became angry. “What gives you the right to come in here and talk to me like this?”
But before he could respond, Thaddeus spoke up and let her have it. All the hurt he felt came out, but then he told her, “Dad abandoned you, but you and Dad abandoned us. I love you Mom and I’ll try to take care of you if that’s what you want, but I don’t know how much more I can take.”
The anguished woman looked upon her son’s face and saw that it was time to give up her fight. She took Thaddeus into her arms, it had finally sunk in. “Ok Mr. Foster, I’ll go.”
Nathan went back to his car and called Bill, who had already set up a meeting for the next morning with about ten of the church women.