Chapter 4
“Anais, I think you’re improving.” Thellium said one afternoon as he helped me work through a difficult passage of a manuscript that detailed the formation of the Seven Shires after the fall of the monarchy.
“Thanks.” I smiled ruefully. “But, I feel like I’m still struggling.”
“You would learn faster if you could spare more of your time.”
I grimaced. “I can’t.”
“I know, I know, you are dedicated to your work. On another note, I was wondering if next week you might look for bound books for me when you are at the market? I have so few that have been printed from the new presses in Courtshire. I’m not sure if any traders deal in books here in Brightshire, but it’s possible some might come in from the west. I’m always interested in histories, religious texts, or natural sciences. You’ve saved me so much money that I’m certain I can afford the luxury.”
“I’ll look. I’ve seen printed books sold in a few shops.”
“Also, if you see any manuscripts on mage-craft, please inform me.”
“Mage-craft, as in magic?”
“As you well know, magic is forbidden in the Seven Shires and if any texts are getting here from other lands I would like to destroy them before they fall into the wrong hands.”
“Why is magic forbidden? In the manuscript, we’re reading about the fall of the monarchy. It sounds like mages helped the Seven Shires, and they made life better for the people. The mages improved crop yields, transportation, and kept the peace. I don’t understand why magic is forbidden. It doesn’t make any sense.”
“It’s complicated, Anais. I’d prefer not to discuss it with you.”
I frowned. I hated being treated like a child. There was so much that I didn’t understand. I loved the idea of magic, it seemed like such a hopeful thing. It didn’t make any sense that it was outlawed.
For about a year I kept up this balancing act. With two coppers a week from Thellium, a copper a week from the Laundry, and with few expenses, I soon accumulated a small fortune. Considering that fifteen coppers could be traded for one silver coin, I had what amounted to more than nine silvers. Unfortunately, everything I considered buying, from fancy dresses to decorative jewelry, seemed impractical. The only indulgence I had allowed myself was the purchase of a small grey leather purse lined with pink silk. I would carry the purse, filled with my coins, across my neck and underneath my shirt each time I ventured to the market for Thellium. I liked the reminder, that at only twelve years of age, I had the means to buy almost anything I liked.
One autumn day I walked through the market, my feet interrupting the floor of dead leaves below. I entered a dimly lit shop owned by a cadaverous old woman named Lilithan. Lilithan sold mainly paintings bought from traders from the west, but she would also sell printed books, when she had them. She was one of the few shopkeepers I found in Brightshire who dealt in books and manuscripts on fairly regular basis.
“My favorite customer,” Lilithan greeted me as I entered. “Here to peruse my books again? A trader from Barriershire came in this morning and sold me a small lot. They’re on the shelf in the back. You know where.”
I made myself comfortable sitting cross-legged on the dirt floor, and slowly read the titles. There was one book that Thellium might want about Candel, a kingdom, north of the Seven Shires. I carried the small book to Lilithan, who charged me a silver for it, which I claimed was well overpriced. We eventually agreed on seven coppers.
“There is one more that you may be interested in,” Lilithan said in a hushed voice as she looked around the empty shop. She pulled out a thin, poorly bound manuscript. “I really shouldn’t have this. I didn’t realize what it was until after the trader left. The lettering on the cover is so faint, and reading is such a trial for me.”
The title read, ‘On the Application of Mage-Craft, a User’s Guide’. I held it in my hands and shivered with excitement.
“How much do you want for it?” I whispered.
“Eight silver coins.”
“That seems high,” I said as I handed the manuscript back to Lilithan. I couldn’t breathe, and gooseflesh crept unrequested over my skin.
“Anais, on this I won’t bargain. I’m a fool to sell it at all. I should destroy it, or arrange for it to be sent to Lord Seve so that he can have it destroyed. It’s only that I trust you, that I’m showing it to you at all.”
I breathed in deeply - a book on magic, real magic, had fallen into my hands. I had to have it. I gave her the coins from my small purse, took the book, which Lilithan carefully wrapped in brown paper, and did not look back. I would not give this to Thellium so that it could be destroyed. It was mine.
In a hidden corner of a seedy pub on the edge of town, I sat on a splintered wooden bench and waited for the bitter lemonade I had ordered. As I cracked open the book, I inhaled the scent of lime and butter. To my disappointment, I could only understand a few of the words, and none of the content. This was well beyond my reading ability and vocabulary. I closed the book, re-wrapped it, and sighed in disappointment.
I returned to the Great House and hid the book with the scarf and my purse in the dark recess underneath my mattress. Later that afternoon, after I worked with Thellium for my hour, I stood up to leave and then turned around again.
“Do you think I could stay longer? I want to work on my letters a bit more.”
“That’s wonderful.” Thellium grinned. “I’ll leave you to it. I’d like to take a look at that book you brought for me, and also I need to cut the shafts of a few feathers. If you have any questions, I will be in the other room.” I struggled through the primer, dutifully copying each simple sentence onto a piece of parchment. Thellium claimed it helped to write down sentences as you read them.
“You ought to get going now, Anais. It’s getting late.” Thellium touched my shoulder.
I jumped, startled out of my concentrated effort. It was well past dark, and I couldn’t believe how much time had passed. I hadn’t stayed this long since our first day. It would be a nightmare waking up the next morning.
It took me through the end of that autumn and all through the deep winter, and the beginning of spring before I could decipher the first few chapters of the book. My thirteenth birthday, along with my two-year anniversary as a servant at the Great House, came and went, but I hardly noticed. I focused all of my attention on this one burning task. When I felt confident with my translation, I carried the book, along with the supplies I had gathered, to a small glen in the woods west of the Great House and the market. I kept all of the supplies in a small leather satchel - bought for two silver. I put the satchel down in the grass, pulled out a paper bag of salt and encircled myself in a poorly constructed ring. The book said the salt would prevent other mages from detecting my presence. I sat in the center of the circle, my legs crossed, and the book open in front of me. The first spell that the book offered involved levitation. I was to choose a light object, holding some personal significance, and place it in front of me. I used the scarf.
I dug a small hole into the soil, and then pulled the small knife that I had taken from the kitchen, out of the bag. I poked the skin on my index finger just hard enough for a drop of blood to emerge, and I let the drop fall into the hole. I put my left hand with the pricked finger into the hole, and held the scarf in my right hand. The book said I should look at the object I wanted to levitate and imagine a stream of energy flowing from the earth, through my blood, and into the object. The book said that the energy was really tiny moving particles. I didn’t understand what that meant and hoped I didn’t need to understand. I was supposed to close my mind to everything but the idea of energy flowing. I focused. Nothing happened. The book had said not to be discouraged if I couldn’t levitate the object at first and that it was often necessary to be given assistance from a master mage.
I screwed up my face in a grimace. This would b
e something of a problem for me, since I didn’t know a master mage, or any mage at all for that matter.
On my next free day, after purchasing supplies for Thellium, I came to the same spot in the woods and tried again. This time I thought I noticed the edges of the scarf flutter a little. It could have been the wind, but I preferred to believe there was some greater meaning in the breeze.
Several months later, I could make the scarf dance in the air. It was amazing and beautiful, and I felt so special. As I had gotten better and better at levitating the scarf, there started to be a small dusting of ash that formed on the ground as I worked at it. The book said I should collect the ash and cover it with fresh soil, which I did carefully after each exercise. The book suggested I next attempt to levitate an object made of metal or stone with the same spell. I would have to find something appropriate.
On a quiet day in the Laundry, several weeks after I had perfected levitating the scarf, I saw a small brass ring in Ernesto’s empty office that looked perfect for the levitation spell. Looking carefully over my shoulder to make sure that no one could see me, I moved my hand over the ring and gently squeezed it into my palm, and pulled my hand away. I slipped the ring into my pocket, leaving the space it had occupied bare. I went back to work, without a word, and willed myself not to feel anxious and accidentally give myself away.
“Anais, do you have a moment?” Ernesto touched my shoulder. Shyte. I quivered. Did he know I had taken the ring?
“Yes,” I whispered. I finished folding a large brown sheet and then followed Ernesto into his office.
“Your friend Kirsten did not show up today. She wasn’t here yesterday either. Do you any idea where she is?” he asked.
I felt instantly relieved. He didn’t suspect anything.
“No,” I responded slowly. “I hope she’s alright. I can ask around.”
“I hope she’s alright too. Let me know if you find out what happened to her.”
“Okay.” I bit my lip. I hadn’t even realized Kirsten was missing. I had become so wrapped up in my work for Thellium and my mage-craft exercises, that my day-to-day activities in the laundry were little more than a blur.
“Oh, and Anais, I thought when you first started here, that you would want to apprentice with me. I hope that is still the case? There isn’t much time before you’ll need to start an apprenticeship.” His question, though softly stated, held a threat. He knew my commitment had faltered. I couldn’t risk losing favor with Ernesto. I would have to stop the mage-craft work for a while, unless, of course, I needed it to find Kirsten. Then I would I would have to use it, wouldn’t I?
After sunset, I went back to my room and searched the manuscript for some method of locating Kirsten. I had queried every scull employed in the Great House about Kirsten’s whereabouts and had even asked Mallory, who still despised me. No one knew what had happened to her. Finally, I found a location spell, but I feared it would be hard. It was well into the heart of the manuscript, and therefore, likely much more difficult than the levitation spell. In addition to the ring of salt, three round stones, an ounce of my blood, and a belonging of Kirsten’s were also required. But I had to try.
I stole a frock from Kirsten’s room and then snuck into the court garden in the hour before twilight to find the stones. It was not a safe place for me to be. If I was caught there, I would be in all kinds of trouble. But I didn’t want to sneak out into the woods beyond the city, I was scared to go so far in the dark.
Again, I drew a circle of salt around myself, and dug a hole in the earth. This time though, I placed the three stones and the frock into it. After I cut myself, I let my blood drip onto the frock, staining it a dark red. I hoped the blood I spilled was enough. I buried both of my hands in the soil, imagined the energy flowing, and pictured Kirsten in my mind. My head started to feel like it was on fire, and then I started to feel odd, as if my mind was no longer connected to my body. My stomach felt acidic, and I tasted iron as I licked my lips. I jumped out of the circle, breaking the ring of salt. It felt better to be outside of it, but I still felt weak. I looked around the garden, and it sparkled. Every drop of dew on every leaf, every petal on every flower, every mineral in the earth glowed for me. I felt heavily connected to the world. I needed to breathe. Shyte! My sight went black, and I fell. Sprawled on the ground, I slowly regained control of my limbs.
I buried the traces of my intrusion into the garden. I could feel Kirsten. I didn’t know exactly where she was, but I felt a pull, it was as if a rope was attached to my gut, leading me forward into the night. I had no choice but to follow it. It didn’t matter that I was afraid. I put a hand on the tall stone wall that fenced in the garden and that blocked me from the direction; I would have to climb over it.
“What are you doing?” A voice called out in the night.
I turned, startled. “Who’s there?”
“Just me.” A barrel shaped boy stepped out of the shadows.
“Who’re you?”
“My name’s Cedric. You really shouldn’t be leaving the grounds this late at night. It’s dangerous in the city after dark.” His hand rose to move a flop of curly brown hair from covering his violet eyes.
“I have to leave. I think a friend of mine is in trouble. She … she needs me.”
“You could wait until morning.”
“I can’t. I really can’t. I have to go now.” The direction pulled harder as I stood talking to the boy. This was horrible. Why was he distracting me?
“I’ll go with you, then. I can’t let you go alone.”
“It could be dangerous,” I warned.
“Then you need someone to protect you.”
“Fine.” I rolled my eyes. I didn’t want him to come with me, but I couldn’t stand around and argue with him. Any resistance I employed against the strength of the direction that was pulling at me, made it hard to breathe.
He helped me climb over the wall, and then scrambled over it.
“My name’s Cedric by the way,” he said as we walked, breaking the silence.
“Okay, thanks,” I murmured.
“Do you want to tell me your name?”
“Um, Anais.”
“Okay. It’s good to meet you Anais.”
“Uh huh.”
He laughed softly. “You’re not very talkative.”
I glared at him.
“How do you know your friend is in trouble?”
“I just know.”
“How do you know where she is?”
“Stop asking so many questions,” I growled.
“My apologies. I was simply curious.”
I let the direction pull me into the woods; Cedric followed. The moon was full and bright over our heads, lighting our way. We walked through dense brushes, over a shallow stream and up a small hill, and then the direction stopped. I stiffened. I didn’t know what to do. I felt suddenly empty of purpose.
“Is this it? Is this where we’ve been going?” Cedric asked.
“I think so. I don’t know.” I started looking around blankly. “I think she’s here somewhere.” I pulled my hands through the dense foliage, searching for something, some sign. “Help me.”
Cedric nodded, and searched through the thick bushes to his left. “Come over here.” Cedric pointed to a body hidden by greenery, his eyes wide. “Is this the girl you were looking for?”
“Oh no,” I moaned. “I mean yes, she’s the one.”
“Well, I don’t think you can help her now. She isn’t breathing, and she looks pretty torn up.” He was kneeling next to the body, his hand hovering over her mouth.
Kirsten’s skin looked like rubber, and she was cold to the touch. Long gashes interrupted her face, and her clothes were ripped and bloody. There was no doubt that she was dead.
“Who could have done something like this? Why?” I murmured, biting my lower lip and trying not to cry.
“I
… I don‘t know,” Cedric answered. “But, there were other people who were found like this. A few years ago, a little boy was found just outside the city gates, and then … there have been others, usually a couple every year. That’s the reason for the curfew.”
“I knew people had disappeared, but I didn‘t know they were killed. I didn’t think…”
“We should go back. It’s dangerous out here. Whoever or whatever did that to your friend could still be around.”
“You’re probably right.” I paused and turned toward him, my eyes narrowed. “Wait, you knew there had been these murders, so why would come out here with me? Why were you outside in the courtyard so late at night in the first place?”
“I saw you from my window. I wanted to find out what you were doing.”
I hadn’t thought at all. What exactly had he seen? This was terrible. Had he seen the salt? Did he know my secret? Maybe it didn’t matter. I gulped. If we were killed tonight, it wouldn’t matter what this boy knew about me. But, if we survived ... would he tell?
“Look Anais, I’m sorry about your friend, but there’s nothing we can do now. We need to go back. We aren’t safe here.”
“You’re right.” It was all so horrible. As we stumbled through the woods, I couldn’t stop the tears from filling my eyes and rolling down my cheeks. I couldn’t believe Kirsten was really dead. We were never close, even after we made peace with each other. But I never wanted her to die. I breathed in deep, and looked more closely at my companion. “I’ve never seen you in the kitchen. Where do you serve?”
Cedric looked over at me. “I don’t serve.”
“What do you mean?”
“Lord Seve is my father.”
“Oh, shyte.” My eyes widened. I should have known. I looked closer at him. His clothes were not that of a servant, he was too clean, and he didn’t talk like one us either. Of late, I had been accused of affecting an upper class accent, presumably a result of my association with Thellium, therefore, I should have been able to peg him as a lordling. I knew how they talked.
I sighed. “You shouldn’t have come. I shouldn’t even be talking to you.”
“It’s too late to change it now. Anyway, I’m glad you didn’t have to find your friend alone,” he said.
When we reached the stone wall, Cedric scrambled up to the top and held out a hand for me. I took it. Just as he finished pulling me up he lost his balance and we both crashed with a thud to the grass floor of the court garden. It was loud, and we were heard.
Two guards ran toward us from their post and were able to grab hold of us before we were able to make a run for it. Shyte!
The guard holding Cedric pulled him closer and turned the boy to face him. “Cedric is that you?” The guard asked. “You know you aren’t supposed to be out at night. What in the name of the sisters were you doing?”
As Cedric’s eyes met the guard’s, his face stopped looking so young, and he smirked and glanced at me. “What did you think I was doing?”
The guard looked at me as I struggled to get out of the grasp of the other guard who was holding me tightly to him. The guard shook his head in disbelief. “I’m going to have to report this to you’re father.”
“I’d rather you didn’t. I was just trying to steal a moment with the girl. You don’t want to get me in trouble. I can trade you some valuable information. Make it worth your while.” Cedric’s expression was blank as he made the offer.
“Oh you will, will you. I don’t think so.” The guard laughed.
“We found a dead body. It looked really torn up.”
The guard’s eyes widened. “Shyte, Cedric! Did it look like the others?”
“I haven’t seen the others. But, it looked pretty bad.”
The guard squeezed his arm. “This isn’t some sort of sick joke. You stupid brat! You will show me the body now, or I will wake up your father.”
Cedric looked at me and shrugged in apology. “Alright, alright. Let the girl sneak back to her room, there’s no need to involve her in this mess.”
The guard looked at me more closely. “Who are you?”
I didn’t answer, instead I just continued to struggle.
“Cedric?” The guard asked.
Cedric shrugged, his manner turned superior. “She works here. Probably a scull. I’m surprised you weren’t able to guess with your advanced detecting skills. She’s not important.”
“Shut up.” The guard tugged on Cedric’s arm. “Take her inside. We can’t have sculls running around at all hours of the night.” As the first guard dragged Cedric off towards the guard tower, the second knelt beside me.
“Look, girl, this can happen two ways. The easy way or the hard way.”
I stared at him, silent.
“I’m going to have to report you. But, if you’re a good girl and tell me you’re name, I’ll wait until morning. And I’ll downplay it a bit; make it sound like it was all Cedric’s fault, which it probably was anyway. What do you say? Tell me your name, and your real name, mind you. I know what you look like.”
My frame slackened. Cedric was gone, and I bore no chance of maneuvering out of this man’s grasp. He was too strong. I considered lying, but it seemed pointless. I was finished. “My name’s Anais. I work in the laundry.”
“That’s a good girl.” He smiled. “I know Ernesto. I can talk to him instead of Mistress Laurey. Who knows, it might not go so badly for you.”
It was hard to sleep at first. I was afraid of what would happen to me, but I also felt funny, burdened with something I didn’t recognize. The feeling had been intensifying since I worked the magic to find Kirsten, but I had been so preoccupied that I hadn’t been able to focus on it until now. I was sinking.
Even though the room was poorly lit, I could tell that the boy was older than I by at least a few years. The boy’s porcelain features were striking, all sharp edges framed with short black hair. His honey colored eyes, his only feature not black or white, looked so hard, so determined. He crouched down next to a man sprawled on the dirt floor below and lightly touched the man’s face. I wondered if the man would wake up, but he didn’t. The boy’s hands, which looked so pale and delicate, flicked open a small silver knife. The boy’s mouth turned up in a half grin half sneer, and he ran the knife rapidly across the man’s throat. A thick line of black blood welled up where the knife had laid its course. I wondered if the man was dead. A light shown on boy’s face, and I recognized him, but I didn’t know how I knew his face.
I jerked awake, breathing heavily. Oh god - what an awful dream. But it was just a dream - just a nightmare. I tried to remember the boy’s face from the dream. I could see him now. He was beautiful, I had never seen a person so beautiful before, and I remembered how I knew him. He was the boy in the cage in the market; the one the dwarf said was a fury. I relaxed back down on my bunk grateful to be awake. Except, I couldn’t really relax. Even though the dream was over, I was still in just as poor of a position as I had been in before I slept.
When I showed up in the laundry for work, Ernesto was waiting for me, his face frozen in a harsh frown. “I spoke with Mistress Laurey this morning. We’re gonna report to her now.” He grabbed me by the shoulder and led me toward Mistress Laurey’s office.
I fidgeted, shifting my weight from foot to foot as I waited for Mistress Laurey to speak.
“I was informed early this morning that you were apprehended sneaking into the castle late last night with Lord Seve’s son. You have been with us for almost three years now, and you know the rules. You are to obey curfew, but more important, you are to stay away from the nobility. Your actions are an embarrassment. They make me look like I have no control over the staff. Do you understand?” Mistress Laurey’s eyes were narrowed.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know he was Lord Seve’s son. I thought he was a scull.” I cringed. What was going to happen?
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“Your intentions are irrelevant. As a servant, you should be invisible to the upper class. I also know about the time you have spent with the scribe. Against my better judgment, I allowed you to continue. Perhaps your time with him gave you a false impression of your place here. In addition, I have also inquired with Ernesto about your work in the laundry.” Mistress Laurey nodded her head to Ernesto, who was standing beside me. His hands were neatly folded in front of him, his face flushed with embarrassment.
“Although Ernesto has reported that your work is satisfactory, he does not want to keep you as an apprentice. He feels that you don’t respect your work.”
“There has to be something I can do. If I could just have more time?”
“I fear not, my dear. You are expelled from your position here. Effective immediately.”
“But … but what am I supposed to do? Where am I supposed to go?” I crumbled.
“Seek work outside of these walls. You don’t belong here. If you did, you would have put more effort towards staying, and you would never have cavorted with the family. I am sorry. I can’t help you now. It would be best for all concerned if you left before nightfall.”