Sean didn't greet me when I reached him on the rope bridge. He took me by the elbow and led me to his car. It was parked right at the end of the bridge, like he knew exactly where to find me when he had come looking for me. I found this weird. Maybe even just a little bit freaky.
Sean escorted me to the passengers side and closed the door just barely before my legs cleared. There was definitely something wrong with him. I didn't like him this way. Actually, I wanted to go home and clean up the mess of glass I had left at the door. I wanted to be there before Addy saw that I had left. I wasn't in the mood for Sean and his attitude right now. And it certainly wasn't worth losing my bike over. Nope. No man would ever be worth that!
Except for Bane. Actually, if I could trade my bike for Bane and bring him into my world, I would, in a heartbeat. Without even thinking twice. And maybe I was only able to say that because I knew I'd never be given that opportunity.
Sean drove in the direction of his castle, without so much as even looking in my direction. This began to make me nervous. Because of the way he was acting, I couldn't help but wonder if he was able to read what I had written in the notebook. I couldn't think of anything else I could have done that would have upset him.
He pulled up into the circular drive at the castle's front entrance. He got out, came around to my side of the car and opened the door. I hesitated, looking up at him, trying to read his unreadable expression. He reached inside, took me by my elbow and assisted me out of the car. His grip was just slightly on the uncomfortable side.
Sean led me inside. The large foyer was empty of anyone but us. And so was the sitting room where he had taken me, at the far left corner of the castle. It was a remarkable circle-shaped room with tall, floor to ceiling windows that were draped in heavy crimson velvet curtains. A plush window bench wrapped around one half of the room. Black velvet pillows crowded the bench. An antique sofa, upholstered in the same red velvet as the widows, sat in the center of the room. It was flanked by two matching chairs. A tea table sat in front of the sofa. On top of it, there was a little black notebook that looked identical to my missing journal.
I rushed across the room and picked the notebook up off the table, about to burst at the seems with happiness and relief. But before I could open it up and look inside, Sean swiped it out of my hands. I wasn't sure how he appeared next to me so suddenly, but I didn't care. He had my journal. And that was all that mattered.
I reached for it, quickly, attempting to swipe it back, but Sean raised it just high enough to where I couldn't reach it.
"Give it to me! That's my journal."
"It does not belong to you anymore, Little One," he said. Then he sat in the sofa, settling back against a velvet pillow. He opened the notebook.
And there I was, or at least, there was the contents of my head, spread out in the palms of his hands.
"Yes it does! You have no right to read that!"
Sean cut his eyes up at me. The look he gave me reminded me that he was an evil man, that he could do eerie, extraordinary things, that I should not upset him. But I was not afraid of him. At least, not at that moment anyway. The only thing I cared about was getting my journal back from him.
And I would get it back from him.
"I suggest you rein in your contentious nature, for it may very well be your debacle." There was a thick warning in his voice, and his expression emphasized it. "Now be a good little girl and sit down beside me."
I sat down beside him. Only because it brought me that much closer to my journal. He couldn't have it. I would take it from him. I just had to wait for the right opportunity.
Sean's gaze moved back to the open pages of my notebook. "Your writing skills are remarkable."
"You have no right to read that!"
"Oh, but you are wrong, Little One. I have every right to read what is mine. It belongs to me, as you do. And it is far too late. I have already read it. Quite thoroughly, I must add." Sean closed the notebook and set it back on the table in front of us. Then he looked at me. "The river is a monster mad / Its mossy talons tear / Into the flesh-like, earthy ground / Beneath the smile I wear / The river is a child in me / That trembles in its skin / Lost and unaware of where / To end or to begin / I stand upon its banks and watch / Its journey through my soul / Baffled by the way that I / Can love and hate it so." Sean paused in the middle of reciting the poem I had written only a few weeks ago and grinned at me. I saw something in his eyes that told me that he knew what this poem meant to me.
While staring at me deeply, he continued. "For years I stand here, rooted deep / And long it takes to see / That if I weep, that if I cry / It heals inside of me / The river is a massive sea / In the corner of my mind / Its twisted paths will lead me to / The strengths I long to find / And I will stand upon its bank / And smile because I know / The river is a child in me / From which I'll learn to grow."
In those few moments, where we only stared at one another, I was all right with him having glimpsed the darkness of my soul that was mirrored in the words I had written. I had always longed to find someone I could share myself with in this way. Maybe Sean would be the one.
Then I thought about Dammon. Dammon was the one.
No, Bane was the one.
No, My Wizard Wise was the one.
Except, I didn't know who My Wizard Wise even was. But I did know that he was not Sean or Bane or Dammon.
Good grief! I didn't need any more guy-trouble. I didn't need a Wizard Wise.
I dropped my chin. The moment evaporated. Sean may have seemed to care about me, but there was something not right about it. And it was this something that would keep me from sharing myself with him.
"Sweet child, she lies in darkness / Sees shadows on the wall / They bathe in bitter moonlight / In hopes they never fall / She waits through empty moments / She waits, and no one knows / Daddy comes, the Beast of Bedtime / Daddy comes, and no one knows," Sean stopped in the middle of reciting yet another one of my poems. His eyes narrowed. He didn't like this poem. Not at all. But he finished it anyway, the words dripping from his tongue like icicles. "Instead of toys, she plays with madness / Fighting tears she longs to cry / Reaching out in angry silence / From a hurt that never dies / In Mother's eyes there burns a blaming / Mother's eyes could never see / The cold, the rage, emotion / The depths of misery / Sweet child, she finds the morning / A breath, a place to hide / With little books of fairytales / Tucked away inside / To dream of wizard's webs of gold / And princes by the sea / That gather in their arms, so strong / A love, so merrily / But oh, and then the day unfolds / And tales are stole away / By tugs of terror, night will come / And smear those pages grey / Sweet child she lies in darkness / Sweet child she'll always be / Lost away forever, this child inside of me."
I felt my cheeks flush with embarrassment. I now sat naked before him. I kept my head down where my face would remain hidden behind my hair.
"Absolutely remarkable," Sean said.
My eyes slowly lifted to the little black notebook sitting on the tea table in front of me. Every muscle in my body was ready to respond to my command to jump, grab and run. It was difficult restraining myself.
Sean's finger curled under my chin and raised my head so that I would look at him. "What pain you have endured," he said, and somehow his words had the strength to awaken the sadness that I had knocked out cold long ago. Pictures of my recent past flashed before my eyes. The sadness rose upward and lodged itself in my throat in a desperate attempt to escape its dark prison inside me. It formed into a large knot and began to suffocate me. While Sean held my eyes in his, I tried to swallow it back down but it would not go away.
"How beautiful I would find the shedding of your tears," Sean said, "but more so if they were shed on my behalf."
I swallowed hard, managing to take back control. The sadness sank down. It had been replaced by the typical anger that wreathed my inner darkness.
I sprang away from Sean, swiped my notebook off the tea table and I ran. I tore out of the r
oom, heart pounding fast like my feet. I flew through the Great Room like I had wings. I was relieved to discover that the front door wasn't locked. I descended the stairs and ran across the lawn, veering around trees and bushes. The yard was heavily wooded. There was about ten acres that separated his castle from the frontage road that would take me to the main road. It was quite a ways away, but I knew in my mind I would make it.
I glanced over my shoulder to see if Sean was in pursuit. He was not there, but I kept on running. I needed as much of a head-start as I could get, if he was going to be coming after me. Off in the distance I caught a glimpse of the gravel road through the trees. I knew I needed to stay in the woods instead of go to the road. Sean could be getting into his car this very minute. He would find me easily, if I were to take the road. I veered to the north, running along the tree line that traced the border of Sean's property. When I came to the river, I stopped. She was deep and wide here. She rushed passed me in a hurry. I glanced behind me, around me, and still Sean was nowhere to be seen. I decided to give myself a moment to think about what I was going to do now. I couldn't swim. There was no way I could cross the river from here, so I had two choices. I could either walk up river and hope I'd find a place to cross, or I could go to the road. If I went up-river, I'd end up closer to Sean's house. The river curved and bent through the woods, heading in the same North-Easterly direction the castle was in.
I was left with only one choice, really. I had to take the road. With a heavy sigh, I turned around to head west.
And there was Sean.
He was leaning, casually, against an oak tree, in very much the same way as when I first saw him in Oak Park.
I gasped in surprise. Then blinked several times because I couldn't believe what I was seeing. There was no possible way Sean was actually standing there. There was absolutely no way he could have just appeared out of nowhere like that.
But, despite my efforts, I could not blink him away. He was there, whether it was possible or not.
Sean wasn't breathing heavy, so I didn't understand how he had caught up to me so quickly. Especially since I didn't see him behind me when I was running.
"You actually believe that you can escape me?" Sean asked. Even though there was a smile in his voice, his face was not smiling. And neither were his eyes. He pushed away from the tree and started moving toward me, slowly, as if he had all the time in the world to get to me.
"You actually believe you can catch me?" I countered.
"Shall we find out?" His eyes, now more copper in color, shimmered in the light of the sun that was peeking through the canopy of branches above us.
I turned and ran, following the river's bank, running like the devil himself was licking at my heels.
But then a powerful force struck me in the back between my shoulder blades. I sailed to the ground, landing hard, and I slid in the grass. I barely had the chance to realize what had happened before a hand slammed into the back of my neck. My face was crushed into the earth. Fingers curled around my throat. I was lifted from the ground like I was weightless. My feet dangled in mid-air while Sean shoved me backward and into a tree. He used his hand on my throat to pin me against it. Bark scraped the flesh at the back of my shoulder as he slid me down the trunk until my feet were on the ground.
Well, I guess we found out," he said. His free hand was gripping a small knife. It appeared before my face. The blade flashed a wedge of sunlight, as he brought the knife to my chin. Gently, he slid the tip of the blade down the underside of my chin. I could feel the sharp, little prick against my flesh as he pressed it slightly into my skin.
I am confident that even if you had known what happens to those who steal from me, you still would have been dauntless enough to steal this." Sean let go of my throat, using the tip of his knife to keep me pinned to the tree. He ripped the notebook from my fingers, waved it in the air and then tossed it to the ground. He took my wrist in his hand, spun me around so that I was facing the tree and then slammed my hand against the trunk. My fingers splayed out on the bark. His chest pressed against my back as his other arm came around me. The knife appeared in front of my face again.
Sean's lips brushed my ear lobe as he spoke. "When people steal from me," he whispered. His hot words in my ear sent a cold shiver through my body. "I cut off their phalanges."
"I didn't steal anything from you! The notebook is mine!" I yelled. Then I hiked my elbow upward, thrusting it into his ribs. It sent a pain shattering through my arm bones on impact. It was like hitting a rock wall. I tried to twist out of his arms, but the knife came down on my pointy finger. Blood leaked from my skin, as he pressed down hard.
The back of my head hit his solid chest when I threw my head back and cried out in pain.
Sean pressed the side of his face against mine and slid the knife across my finger. The sharp blade separated the skin. Blood trickled away from the open wound. Sean held the knife there, no longer moving it.
"Be attentive, My Little One," Sean whispered into my ear. The gentleness in his voice did not match his behavior. "The book does not belong to you anymore. It is mine. Your lack of understanding has helped me to commiserate. As a show of clemency, I will allow you to keep your digit. But not without a permanent reminder that you will never steal from me again. And, because I am judicious and well aware that you are slow to learning, I will show you slowly."
Sean pressed the knife harder into my finger and slowly began to slide it back and forth across my flesh, severing my flesh deeper and deeper. I cried out in sheer agony. The pain was so intense. I could feel the blade sawing against my bone, sending shocks of pain up through my hand and into my entire arm. I closed my eyes tight, biting down hard on my teeth. Sean's hot breath slithered constantly into my ear and down my neck.
Then finally it was over. The sawing had stopped. I was afraid to open my eyes. I was afraid I would find that I now only had four fingers on the hand that was still pinned to the tree in front of me.
Sean's back went away from me. I could feel him move my hand away from the tree, but I still did not open my eyes.
Until I felt his tongue on my finger.
Sean was staring into my eyes, when I lifted my eyelashes. His tongue slowly, diligently, lapped at the blood on my mangled finger.
But it was still there. He had not cut my finger off, just like he said he wouldn't.
Sean's tongue slithered over the gapping wound, intensifying the pain. I tried to pull my hand away, but he held my wrist tightly. Sean sucked my entire finger into his mouth. His eyes closed as if passion had swept over him and he had succumbed to it.
With him so distracted, it was the perfect time to escape him.
I pulled my finger out of his mouth, but could not pull free from his hand. With my free hand, I swung at him, landing my fist in the corner of his jaw. It was a blow that would have knocked anyone else out cold, I was sure of it.
But not Sean.
The powerful blow barely caused his head to turn to the side. But, before Sean could respond, I hiked my knee up fast and hard, landing it right between his legs. This time, his size didn't matter. Sean's grip loosened on my finger almost instantly. The moment it did, I tore away from him.
I ran, leaving a trail of blood droplets behind me from my profusely bleeding finger. I wasn't smart enough to grab my journal before I ran. I had completely forgotten about it at that point. Getting away from Sean was all that mattered now. Of course, I knew that even if I did escape him, it would only be temporary.
Sean would be coming for me.
He would find me.
And he wasn't going to be happy when I saw him again.
****
Chapter Fifteen
Bane