of actually following-through with.
I sighed now, wishing with all my heart that I had a spine, and gathered my things as Theresa came in to take over. It's fate, I tell you. She's out to get me.
"Bye, Theresa," I called over my shoulder.
"Good night."
I slung the bag over my shoulder and headed for the cafeteria. I had a note for the cafeteria lady. Her son and I were pen pals, and he would give me letters in email and envelopes to give to her. It was a great feeling to see her face get all wistful as she reminisced over his boyhood. And it was a great way of getting a secret stash of hot dogs. Now if I could only get up the nerve to ask Zell.
But I wasn't going to hold my breath.
Of course, I had to give myself some credit. Didn't I speak to him when giving him that Mega Phoenix? And on the train that time when I found that rare Combat King issue? Didn't I sit by him at the victory party and keep him from choking on hotdogs? I can talk to him if I really set my mind to it. Just like I could pass the Fire Cavern. It was all a matter of how badly I wanted it.
So how bad do I want to go out with Zell?
I absently picked up a piece of trash to put it in a nearby garbage can. I'd had a crush on Zell as long as I'd been studying at Balamb Garden, which meant five years. What's so awful and terrifying about talking to him and asking him out? The worst he could do would be to say 'Are you kidding? Get lost!'
I could see that happening the day Commander Squall fell in love with me--don't ask.
Zell would more than likely say 'Huh? Go out? Oh! Sure!' while immediately assuming I meant hang out as friends. What's so bad about that? It's better than nothing. It's better than being labeled a chicken-wuss and being hounded by Seifer and his 'posse.' Isn't it? I gave a shrug and entered the cafeteria.
I pulled the most recent note from my bag's outer pocket. "Hi, Francine. Mark sent another letter."
Francine's tired face brightened as she wiped her hands on a nearby towel, pausing her duty of washing the lunch trays. I vaguely noticed the usual long line of students and instructors waiting for their chance at the hot dogs.
"Thank you, young lady," she said as she eagerly retrieved the letter from my outstretched hand. "I've been looking forward to this all week."
"Is he coming to visit?" I set my bag on the floor and then crossed my arms on the counter-top. "It's been months."
Francine sadly nodded as her dark eyes misted. "That it has, young 'un. But the letters and the memories are enough for me now that I know he's safe. I wouldn't want him to give up his excitement for little ole me."
I smiled, reassuring her with a hand covering hers. "He knows, and that's why he loves you so much." I vaguely heard the other cafeteria lady announce "No more. Sorry" and then the general commotion of everyone leaving. "Maybe one of these days you two can set up a meeting? You know? You leave Balamb Garden and take the train or ship somewhere to meet up with him? It wouldn't have to be far, and you know you'd have fun."
Francine's expression grew thoughtful. "Let me give that thought a whirl, girlie," she said as she gave my hand a squeeze. "In the meantime, why don't you sit yourself down over there. I'll bring you some dinner."
I smiled wider as I picked up my bag, slinging it over my shoulder with a slight "oomph" before saying "Okay. Thanks, Francine."
"No problem at all, girlie." She turned away.
I watched her a moment, hoped I'd grow old as gracefully, and then turned-- and bumped into Zell. My bag dropped to the floor. Splut "Oh!" I flushed red and knelt to pick up the books and papers that refused to stay inside. "I'm sorry," I stammered.
"No prob." Zell crouched, picking up a pencil that had retreated from the circle of my reach. He handed it to me. "Don't sweat it."
I took the pencil with shaking fingers, stuffing it into a random pocket. "Thanks." We stood at the same time and nearly hit heads. He swerved in a quick dodge and then grinned at me. Horror that I'd nearly caused a concussion made me back off a step. "Th-They're out of hot dogs," I stammered. 'They're out of hot dogs,' Sally? Is that all you could come up with!?
Zell's grin faded as quick as anything I'd seen. He snapped his fingers. "Aw man! Late again."
"B-But you can have some of m-mine," I offered quickly.
Zell took a startled step back, as I'd seen him do so often, and blinked in shock. "Wha– Really?"
I nodded, not trusting my voice, and tightly gripped the strap of my bag.
"Wow. Thanks." He looked around. "Where are they?"
I swallowed hard. Am I really doing this? "F-Francine. She's g-going to bring them out."
"Cool." Zell performed his up-beat lumber toward the nearest table.
I stared after him. Now what? Tell Francine to give them to him while I leave, waving good-bye on my way past? Saunter over there as if it were the most natural thing in the world for me to be sitting with Zell Dincht?
Zell spun a chair around to straddle it, gesturing at me with an inviting smile that - to him - was as innocent as could be. To me, it turned my legs to jelly and dragged me over as if he'd had a hand on my arm. Hyne, please don't let me throw-up. Anything but that. I slowly lowered myself into the chair, giving him a very timid smile in response to his easy-going grin. I clutched my bag to me as a shield.
"So how'd you work a stash of hot dogs?"
A million and one things crashed together on my tongue, making it impossible to say anything. Zell, of course, didn't mind and just jumped to the most logical conclusion.
"You buds with the cafeteria ladies, huh? I've tried that since I've studied here. Never worked. What's your secret?"
Smooth stories and cool answers vanished as I opened my mouth to try and regain some dignity. His grin kept distracting my mind from sending complete sentences to my waiting and half-open mouth. I must have looked like a grat.
"Pen pal," I faltered.
"Pen pal?" he queried with a confused expression in those gorgeous eyes-- "For what?"
Look away, Sally. Look away. I lowered my eyes to my hands as they clutched the strap of my bag. I took in a slow breath. "I'm a p-pen pal with Francine's son. S-sometimes I b-bring her letters and e-mails from h-him."
"Pen pal, huh? Hm. Good plan."
I momentarily looked up, but I looked down again when conscious thought began to fade. "I-It wasn't a plan," I whispered. "It j-just happened. I never a-ask her to do it."
Francine rescued me from having to say more when she set a tray of six hot dogs on the table between us.
"Here ya go, girlie. I brought you some extras." She cuffed Zell on the back of the head. He protested, but she ignored it. "I know how this hooligan eats. Nearly choked to death one time."
I know, I thought with a somewhat wistful smile. I had been able to 'rescue' him.
"Well if you saved me hot dogs once in a while, I wouldn't need to scarf!"
Francine laughed and moved away.
Zell grinned--a normal expression for him--and handed me a plate. "She's a riot."
I motioned to the plate. "I-I only want one. You c-can have the others."
"You sure?" he asked, but the twinkle in his eyes shouted eagerness and anticipation.
I nodded.
Zell scooped up the hot dogs, added them to his pile, and then started talking about classes and battles and Seifer as he ate. I listened, watching him with a slight smile as I occasionally pinched myself or stepped on my toe to make sure I was awake.
I was, and I have the bruises to prove it.
"So we're running through Balamb--Irvine, Squall, and me--trying to track down the 'captain' so we can get to the 'commander' and find out what the hell was going on," Zell continued while waving his half-eaten hot dog in the air for effect. "We finally track him to my house - my house, can you believe it? - where he stinks up ma's kitchen with a rotten fish!"
"Oh no. Your poor mother."
"Damn straight!" Zell took a full bite of the hot dog, attempting to wash it down with his soda. He coughed a little bef
ore continuing. "Squall remembered about the dog at the harbor, so we high-tailed it and let the dog take it from there."
"Where was he? The 'captain', I mean." By this time I was so enthralled in the story and how he told it that I hadn't noticed the brightness of the lights compared to the dark outside, or the fact Francine had long since waved good night.
"Hiding on the train, or something."
I absently handed him my untouched hot dog as I leaned slightly forward. "What happened?"
Zell laughed as he took it, waving it again as he graphically portrayed the action. "The dog chased him out like a buel out of the Fire Cavern. Funniest damn thing ever. Raijin with a dog on his ass. Looked like the biggest dork I ever seen!"
"And then you got to the commander?"
Zell nodded as he polished off the last of the hot dog. "Had to beat both of 'em, though, before they'd get out of Balamb."
I rested my chin in my hand as my other fiddled with the now empty tray. My mind was somehow blissfully ignorant that this was real anymore. "Wow," I whispered.
Zell nodded again. "Thanks for the hot dogs." He stood, making a gesture over his shoulder. "I'm gonna jet. See ya."
I blinked and straightened. "Oh. You're welcome. Have a good night," I called to his escaping figure.
Zell waved without looking back. I slumped back into the chair with a silly smile, giggling as I hugged my bag to my chest.
2: Day Two
I lounged on cloud nine the next morning all through class. While a part of me knew it would probably never happen again, another part admitted that stranger things had happened. All I had to do was talk to