Read Clarissa Harlowe; or the history of a young lady — Volume 3 Page 11

  LETTER X

  TO MISS ARABELLA HARLOWE [ENCLOSED TO MISS HOWE IN THE PRECEDING.] ST.ALBAN'S, APR. 11.

  MY DEAR SISTER,

  I have, I confess, been guilty of an action which carries with it a rashand undutiful appearance. And I should have thought it an inexcusableone, had I been used with less severity than I have been of late; andhad I not had too great reason to apprehend, that I was to be made asacrifice to a man I could not bear to think of. But what is done, isdone--perhaps I could wish it had not; and that I had trusted to therelenting of my dear and honourable parents.--Yet this from no othermotives but those of duty to them.--To whom I am ready to return (ifI may not be permitted to retire to The Grove) on conditions which Ibefore offered to comply with.

  Nor shall I be in any sort of dependence upon the person by whose meansI have taken this truly-reluctant step, inconsistent with any reasonableengagement I shall enter into, if I am not further precipitated. Let menot have it to say, now at this important crisis! that I have a sister,but not a friend in that sister. My reputation, dearer to me than life,(whatever you may imagine from the step I have taken,) is suffering. Alittle lenity will, even yet, in a great measure, restore it, and makethat pass for a temporary misunderstanding only, which otherwise will bea stain as durable as life, upon a creature who has already been treatedwith great unkindness, to use no harsher a word.

  For your own sake therefore, for my brother's sake, by whom (I must say)I have been thus precipitated, and for all the family's sake, aggravatenot my fault, if, on recollecting every thing, you think it one; nor bywidening the unhappy difference, expose a sister for ever--prays

  Your affectionate CL. HARLOWE.

  I shall take it for a very great favour to have my clothes directly sentme, together with fifty guineas, which you will find in my escritoire(of which I enclose the key); as also of the divinity and miscellanyclasses of my little library; and, if it be thought fit, myjewels--directed for me, to be left till called for, at Mr. Osgood's,near Soho-square.