‘Bye, Mum.’
Alice felt glad that nothing seemed to have really changed between her and Stephanie, despite everything.
Chapter Sixteen
Tuesday 26th August 1997
Alice arrived at the hospital early. She was there at 10 a.m. As she sat in the waiting room, she began to feel nervous, worrying about what would show up in the tests. She was tempted to leave; after all, she had not felt any pain in her arm for a while—but she remembered back to the pain she had felt and how unbearable it had been. It would be best to find out what had caused it.
The hospital was busy, and even with her appointment set for 10.30, she had to wait until 11.15 before her name was called. Her blood pressure was checked and a nurse took some blood from her arm. Then, the nurse took her to an x-ray room where Alice was told to stand behind a screen. She was left alone in the room as the strange machine took an x-ray picture. Afterwards, she was told to wait upstairs, to see the consultant. Looking at her watch, she saw it was 12.15. She couldn’t help thinking back to the night of her dream. So much had happened since then.
She felt hungry as she had missed breakfast. There was a vending machine in the corridor, selling hot drinks and snacks. Walking over to the machine, she looked at the prices and found she had just enough change to buy a coffee and a packet of crisps.
She felt glad she had purchased the snack, because long after she had finished eating, she was still waiting to see the consultant. She almost finished reading the novel she’d brought with her. Finally, at almost half past two, she was called in to see the consultant. He was a friendly looking man, with a bald head, and a thick, white beard. He told her that there was nothing irregular in her blood test results, and the x-ray showed a perfectly healthy arm. He was pointing out parts of the x-ray picture, as if Alice were as experienced in these things as he was. He explained that there were no signs of any fractures or anything that could have caused her pain.
The consultant seemed confused that she had been complaining of pain. He began to ask her a list of questions about her general health, and whether she’d had any past injuries or illnesses. He generally nodded at her answers. After completing his notes, he sighed.
‘Well, Miss Turnbull, I am still none the wiser as to why you were in such pain. Perhaps you strained a muscle and it has now healed. If you suffer any more pain, we’ll run some further tests. I really can’t think of anything else.’ He looked up towards the ceiling as if for inspiration and then said, ‘Do you have any sisters or brothers?’
Alice thought it an odd question, but guessed that perhaps he was trying to go down the line of finding out if there was some genetically inherited condition in the family. ‘Um... well, yes, I do have a sister.’
‘This is a long shot, but has she had an arm injury lately?’
Alice’s mouth fell open. ‘Um... ye... yes, she has... but what’s that got to do with anything?’
‘Well, it’s rare, but it has been known that siblings can sometimes feel each other’s pain. This sort of thing has never been proven scientifically, of course, but I’ve come across a few cases in my time. For example, husbands have claimed to feel labour pains.’ He laughed.
Alice laughed nervously, too, while her brain was trying to make sense of the new information. Was it really possible that she had felt Jane’s pain?
The doctor continued, ‘It certainly can’t be ruled out that you may have been feeling a sympathetic pain, for your sister. However, you shouldn’t rely too heavily on that theory. I’d advise you to contact your GP again if you have any further problems with your arm.’
As Alice left the doctor’s room she couldn’t get the picture out of her head, of Jane with her arm in plaster.
***
In the evening, Alice was preparing her dinner when the telephone rang. She picked it up, a little annoyed at the interruption, with the intention of telling whoever it was to call back later.
‘Hello, Alice. It’s Jane.’
Jane? Alice sat down on the sofa, completely forgetting about her pasta that was simmering on the hob.
‘Jane! Hello, it’s nice to hear from you,’ she said, a smile on her lips.
‘We have to meet up,’ said Jane. She didn’t sound happy. It was more of an urgent plea. ‘Are you free tomorrow? We have to talk.’
Alice felt nervous. What had happened? What did she want to talk about?
‘Um... Yes. I mean, tomorrow evening, after work; about six-ish?’ said Alice, remembering that she was supposed to be going out with Andrew. He would be picking her up at eight. ‘Has something happened?’
‘I’ll explain everything, tomorrow,’ said Jane, flatly. ‘Do you live with your... er... with your mum?’
‘No.’
‘Good, because we’ll need somewhere private to talk. I’ll come to your house tomorrow. What’s the address?’
Alice gave Jane her address, still bemused by her tone of voice.
‘I’ll be at your flat at about six-thirty tomorrow.’
‘Okay.’
‘Bye.’ Jane hung up the phone before Alice could reply.
Alice concluded from the way Jane had spoken on the phone, that Ken and Miranda must have told her everything about the surrogacy. They must have told her that she and Alice were really sisters, and not just half-sisters. That would explain why she seemed to have been almost in shock. It had obviously come as a great blow to her to realise that her parents had lied to her for so long. Alice recalled the way she herself had reacted when Stephanie had told her that she wasn’t her real mother, and when she’d first heard about the surrogacy agreement.
Ken and Miranda had obviously been worried that Jane would find out everything from her, and decided that it would be better coming from them. Alice remembered that she had let Jane believe she was her half-sister when they had last spoken, so, Jane obviously thought that she didn’t know the whole truth.
Alice concluded that Jane was coming over tomorrow to tell her about the surrogacy agreement, and to tell her that Miranda was her real mother.
Poor Jane. Alice wondered whether she should phone her, to tell her that she already knew. At least, then, Jane wouldn’t have to spend the whole night worrying about how she would break the news to her. But she couldn’t bear to dial the number. What if her father, or Miranda, answered the phone? They wouldn’t want her to speak to Jane, anyway. Maybe if I disguise my voice, and pretend I’m one of Jane’s friends.
Alice looked for her handbag. Jane’s address and telephone number were in there. She fished around in her bag and the first thing she saw was the old photograph of her father, smiling, as he held her in his arms. She could not help staring at the photograph again. As she looked at it now, instead of seeing her father as a happy, young man, with smiling eyes, all she could see was treachery and deceit in his eyes. Alice imagined that when this picture was taken, he had probably been having an affair with Miranda, and planning how he would leave Stephanie and Alice to be with her. She tore the photograph in half and threw it on the floor.
She continued looking in her bag, found the piece of paper she’d been searching for, and walked over to the telephone.
‘Hello,’ a woman answered the phone, but she could not be sure if it was Miranda or Jane. Unsure whether she should just hang up the phone, she decided she would wait until the person spoke again. Whoever had answered the phone, did not speak again. The phone line went dead. Alice redialled the number. ‘Hello,’ said the voice again; and again Alice could not distinguish it. She remembered though, that she had not dialled 141 before phoning, so her number could be traced. She would have to answer.
‘Oh, hello,’ she said in a posh voice, trying to disguise her own. ‘Can I speak to Jane?’
‘She’s out, I’m afraid. Can I take a message?’ It was Miranda.
‘No, it’s okay. I’ll call back,’ said Alice.
‘Well, she won’t be back until tomorrow. She’s staying with a friend,’ said Miranda.
>
‘Okay, I’ll call tomorrow.’ Alice hung up the phone.
She felt disappointed that she wouldn’t be able to tell Jane that she already knew about the surrogacy agreement, and the fact they were sisters. However, in a way, she felt pleased that at least this meant that Jane would be coming to her flat tomorrow. If she had told her, there would have been no need for Jane to visit her.
She was looking forward to seeing Jane again. She began to imagine how much fun it would be to have a sister around. They could get to know each other, tell each other their secrets, gossip about things. It would be great. She could hardly wait to see her. For as long as she could remember, she had always envied people who had siblings, and often wished that she could have had a sister or a brother. Now she had found Jane, it was like having her wish granted. It was like having a dream come true.
Chapter Seventeen
Wednesday 27th August 1997
Alice sat in her living room. It was 6.15 p.m. She stared at the clock.
She had been excited all day at the prospect of Jane coming to see her. Although she had already met her a few times, this time would be different, because Jane would be visiting her flat. She was slightly nervous about whether the flat was tidy enough, or whether it would be what Jane expected.
When the shop was quiet at work, Alice had told Charlotte about Jane. At first, Charlotte had seemed really interested:
‘Oh, you’re so lucky, Alice! I’ve always wanted a sister. I’ve only got three brothers,’ said Charlotte.
Alice noticed that the newspaper she had hidden under the counter two weeks ago, was still there; the newspaper with Jane on the front page. She took the paper out and placed it on the counter. ‘That’s my sister,’ she said proudly. ‘Can you believe it?’
‘Yeah, right,’ Charlotte laughed. ‘So, you’ve just been having me on about having a sister. You definitely fooled me! But what was the point? Alice, you can be so weird sometimes.’ She giggled and shook her head.
‘I’m not having you on. It’s true! Remember you were saying she looks so much like me?’
‘Yes... but... Alice, I know it’s probably lonely being an only child, but it’s just weird trying to pretend you’ve got a sister.’
‘I’m not pretending, Charlotte.’
Charlotte sighed. ‘Okay, Alice, if you say so.’ She rolled her eyes.
‘You don’t believe me, do you? Look, her name’s Jane Forester, it says it here. Didn’t I tell you my dad’s surname was Forester?’
Charlotte frowned and picked up the newspaper. She looked up at Alice after scanning the paper with her eyes. Shrugging her shoulders, she said, ‘Well, it sounds so unbelievable, I’m not sure whether you are telling the truth or not. You’ll have to bring her in, and introduce her to me one day.’
‘Okay,’ Alice said, grinning. For once, Charlotte seemed speechless.
***
As she sat waiting for Jane to arrive, Alice tried to put all the negative thoughts out of her mind. At the end of the working day, she became a little nervous; after all, she didn’t really know what Jane was coming to talk to her about, and she had sounded serious on the telephone. Alice had begun to imagine that perhaps she had some bad news for her. Maybe she was going to tell her that she didn’t want anything more to do with her, just like her parents had. Maybe they had spoken to Jane and somehow convinced her not to become friendly with her.
Surely Jane wouldn’t come all the way here to tell me she doesn’t want to see me again. She could have said that over the phone.
There was something that had disturbed her about the sound of Jane’s voice the previous night, however, and so she knew she wouldn’t really be able to relax fully until Jane arrived.
At 6.35 p.m., the front doorbell rang. Alice realised she had been sitting staring at the clock for the past twenty minutes or so. She decided to switch on the television before opening the door to dispel a bit of the tension from the room.
As Alice walked towards the front door, she noticed the torn pieces of the photograph of her father. They were still lying on the floor, where she had thrown them the night before. She picked them up and threw them in the wastepaper basket that sat next to the sofa.
Alice opened the door and saw that it was raining heavily outside.
‘Hello,’ said Jane, smiling.
‘Hello.’ Alice forced a smile although inside she was still nervous.
Jane seemed to be having trouble closing her umbrella, as she still had the plaster-cast on her right arm.
‘I’ll do that,’ said Alice, taking the umbrella, shaking the rain off of it, and closing it. She placed the umbrella just inside the front door.
She helped Jane take off her raincoat, and hung it on the coat-stand.
‘I can’t wait until I can have this plaster-cast removed,’ said Jane. ‘It’s such a pain. I can hardly do anything on my own.’
‘Yeah, it must be a nuisance,’ said Alice. ‘Are you all right though? I read all about that plane crash you were in. You must have been really scared.’
‘Yes, I was. I still have nightmares. It was so frightening. I go to counselling sessions at the hospital. One positive thing is that I’ve made some really good friends. It was such a traumatic experience that it brought all the survivors together. It almost feels like we’re family.’
‘I can’t imagine what it’s like to go through something like that,’ said Alice, latching on to the word “family” which reverberated in her mind. Was Jane about to accept her or reject her from her real family?
The two girls were standing by the front door. Jane seemed nervous. Alice wondered whether she should tell Jane about her nightmares around the time of the plane crash, but it didn’t feel like the right time. She was still anxious to hear what Jane had come to tell her.
‘This is a nice flat,’ said Jane. ‘Do you own it?’
‘No, I rent it.’
‘I wish I was living on my own. You do live on your own?’ Jane’s eyes peered around the room, as if trying to work out if anyone else was in the flat.
‘Yes, I live on my own.’
An audible sigh left Jane’s lips. Then she smiled and looked at Alice. ‘I still live with my parents, as you know. They mean well, but they can get in the way sometimes.’ She giggled.
Another brief moment of awkward silence followed. ‘Um... please sit down,’ said Alice eventually, leading the way to the sofa.
Jane followed her and sat down.
‘Would you like a cup of tea?’
‘Er... yes, that would be nice,’ said Jane, looking at the floor.
Alice could not tell from her expression whether she was happy or sad, or if she had come to relay good news or bad news. She had smiled at her a couple of times and they’d had a relatively pleasant exchange of words so far, but there was an underlying current of tension which Alice hoped she was imagining.
‘Do you take milk and sugar?’
‘Just milk, please,’ said Jane, as if she were ordering from someone in a café.
Alice went into the kitchen and switched on the kettle. As she looked for the mugs and spoons, random thoughts ran through her mind. She pondered how she and Jane were strangers; they had lived for years without knowing each other. Will it ever be possible to make up for the lost time, or will there always be this distance between us? She could tell that whatever Jane had come to relate to her, she was not finding it easy; she seemed to be finding it difficult to even look at her.
Alice took the tea into the front room and handed a mug to Jane who took it and held it, staring into the mug as if she were trying to read her fortune from the tea leaves.
‘So,’ said Alice, trying to think of something to say to break the silence, ‘did you have any difficulty finding my flat?’
‘No, it was easy to find.’ Jane looked at the television as she spoke. She did not appear to be watching the television programme, but seemed to be in a world of her own, as if she were in a trance.
&n
bsp; ‘I was so surprised when I found out your address. We live so close to each other; only a few miles away,’ said Alice, trying to start a conversation.
‘Yes.’ Jane’s expression remained unchanged.
‘Jane, yesterday, when you phoned me, you said we had to talk.’
‘I know. We do have to talk,’ she said, now looking at Alice pensively. ‘There is something important I have to tell you, but it’s difficult to know where to start. You see, I don’t know how much you know about the circumstances of your birth, about...’
Alice interrupted, with a sigh of relief: ‘It’s okay, I already know everything.’
‘But... But, when we first met you said we were half-sisters, so I thought—’ started Jane.
‘I know I did, but the reason I didn’t let on to you before was because I knew that your parents hadn’t told you the truth.’
Jane stared at her, with wide eyes. ‘And you thought it was okay that they hadn’t told me?’
‘No, of course not. But, your dad said he wanted to tell you himself.’
‘He’s your dad, too,’ said Jane, correcting her.
‘Um.’ Alice looked at the ground. ‘No, actually, I don’t consider him to be my dad. Your parents practically threw me out of your house on Saturday. They told me they don’t want to know me. They don’t want me to contact them, or you, again. Didn’t you notice how keen they were for me to leave when you came home?’
‘That was because I didn’t know the truth on Saturday,’ said Jane. ‘They were worried you would tell me. When they finally told me everything, they said that they were afraid that if they didn’t tell me, I’d find out from you anyway. They didn’t want to tell me at first. They were worried about what my reaction would be. But, Alice, are you sure you know the whole story?’ Jane wore a frown.
‘Yes, of course; they told me everything on Saturday. Well, I’d sort of guessed everything anyway,’ said Alice.
Jane raised her eyebrows and seemed surprised.