How about we have a little fun? Let’s take off the kid gloves, stop beating around the bush, lay all our cards on the table, get right to the point, leave no stone unturned, start firing on all cylinders, and tackle the whole enchilada. Every writer worth his salt (oops, there goes another one) knows that clichés are considered a lazy and tacky form of writing. The Cliché Police may chase us down, but isn’t it cathartic to fling a few of these forbidden fruits around? In other words, in the spirit of unfettered laziness, let’s take a whimsical look at some of the silly reasons we don’t pray.
Almost every book I’ve read on the subject of prayer has a chapter on excuses. Most of them deal with deeply spiritual matters of the heart. But since you and I are just now getting acquainted, I thought we might take a different approach and spice it up with a hint of humor. An ice-breaker, if you will. How better to cut to the chase? Sorry. That one slipped.
The Top 10 Excuses Why Christians Don’t Pray
10. I have bad knees. I can’t kneel to pray. It doesn’t count if I’m not kneeling. Talk about your lame excuse.
9. My pastor prays at church services. That’s enough for me. Piggy-back prayer coverage. Who knew?
8. God’s got His hands full with tsunamis and people living in poverty and starvation and wars and hospital wards and crime and—well, face it. He doesn’t have time for my piddlysquat prayers. Be not downhearted, my friend. There are no “piddlysquat” prayers to God. “He’s got the whole world in His hands”—feel free to sing along—“He’s got the whole world . . . ”
7. It’s none of your business. It’s personal. It’s just between God and me. Sounds like someone woke up with a case of the grumpies. Here, have some coffee. We’ll chat later. After your second cup, okay?
6. If God knows me so well, I shouldn’t have to verbalize my prayers for Him. He’s either omniscient or He’s not. Come on now, don’t be shy. Tell us what you really think.
5. Prayer is a waste of time. It doesn’t change a thing. I know—I prayed for a pony when I was a kid and never got one. Then I prayed for world peace. Fat chance of that ever happening. I’m not psychic, but I’m guessing you’d say that glass of water you’re holding is half empty. Am I right?
4. I can never stay focused. My mind wanders. I figure that’s an insult to God, so I’m better off if I don’t pray at all. Are you going to eat that chocolate donut or can I have it? I’m sorry, what were you saying?
3. I don’t know what to say. I don’t know how. It’s just too awkward. Well, so was learning how to go potty when you were two, but you kept after it and chances are, you’re no longer in diapers. Please tell me you’re not still in diapers?
2. I’m lazy. There. I said it. Satisfied? Yes! And doesn’t it feel good to come clean? Oh, that the rest of us should be so honest.
And the #1 excuse Christians give for not praying?
1. I Don’t Have Time! I’m Busy! Yeah, I heard that about you. Is it true the world will indeed stop spinning on its axis if you don’t keep all your appointments today? Just curious.
I have plenty to say about this #1 jewel, but I’ll save it for Chapter 5. In the meantime, let’s address some of the previous countdown excuses.
To Kneel or Not to Kneel, That Is the Question
Hopefully, you’re not serious about this one because I tossed it in just for fun. I’m unaware of any scripture requiring us to get down on our knees to pray. I grew up in a Southern Baptist church, and the only time we knelt for prayer was in response to an altar call at the end of the service or following a particularly fiery sermon by a visiting evangelist. Our pews weren’t equipped with the pull-down kneeling bench found in most Catholic and Episcopalian churches.
But that doesn’t mean I never knelt to pray. To be honest, I never even gave it much thought until the last few years. I realized there were certain occasions when Christ knelt to pray, and I began asking God if He wanted me on my knees. No, I never heard an audible voice. But sometimes, when I’d notice my mind drifting in the midst of my prayer time, I sensed an internal nudge in my spirit urging me to get down on my knees. It immediately helped me to focus on God and obliterate the distractions. I try to stay tuned in for those holy nudges so I don’t miss the blessing.
Piggy-back Prayers
You don’t have to be a Mother Teresa to know this one won’t cut it. Unfortunately, even though most of us would never admit it, we convince ourselves that a few minutes warming the pew now and then, listening to someone else pray is somehow sufficient. As if by showing up and tipping our spiritual hat to God, we’re covered.
News flash: God wants you. He wants a relationship with you. That’s why He made you. And I have to be honest with you here. If you don’t have much interest in spending time with God, I have to wonder about your salvation. No, I’m not Judge Judy. But if you’re just going through the motions, playing the part but never owning your relationship with God, chances are you need to go back to square one and be sure beyond a shadow of doubt that you truly gave your heart to God. So you can know that you know that you know that Jesus is Lord of your life. If you didn’t previously make a pit stop there, flip over to the back of the book to the section I mentioned earlier about becoming a Christian. Go on. Take your time. I’ll wait for you.
God’s Got Bigger Problems than Me
Sure He does. But remember those “O” words we use in reference to God? I’m referring to omniscient (having total knowledge of all things) and omnipresent (being present everywhere at the same time). These are two attributes of God that are tough for us to comprehend. But as believers, we accept that God is certainly capable of knowing everything and being everywhere simultaneously. To think otherwise would be to question who He says He is. And that’s never a smart choice, Mr. Doubting Thomas.
One of my favorite books is Just Give Me Jesus by Anne Graham Lotz, daughter of beloved evangelist Billy Graham. I heard Anne speak several years ago at a conference in Florida and was literally blown away. I’m not sure I’ve ever heard anyone speak with such depth of understanding about our walk as Christians. I remember thinking how refreshing it was to hear her message because she was so incredibly genuine. There wasn’t an ounce of insincerity in her. There wasn’t a single moment when she came across as a celebrity or some much-sought-after speaker on the Christian circuit. When she spoke, we felt the presence of the Lord in that room. Not long after that event, I picked up a copy of her book Just Give Me Jesus. I’ve read it over and over as part of my prayer time for years. Let me share what she says about God’s interest in us.
The greatness of His power to create and design and form and mold and make and build and arrange defies the limits of our imagination. And since He created everything, there is nothing beyond His power to fix or mend or heal or restore. . . . Having brought everything into existence that exists, He has never become bored with or distracted from or unconcerned about His creation. The Living Logos personally hovers over all He has created, giving it His full attention.1
In other words, nothing is too small for God. There is nothing in your life or mine that He regards as “piddlysquat.” Are we clear on that now?
It’s Personal
Now I have to agree with this one. Prayer is designed to be personal because it is the form of communication between you and your Father in heaven. In Matthew 6, Christ gave us a model for prayer. We know it as the Lord’s Prayer. But skip back a few verses and listen to what He says.
But when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. When you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. —Matthew 6:5-6
God isn’t fooled for a millisecond by those who pray loud and long and with great braggadocios for the sake of being heard. You’ve heard those kinds of prayers and so have I. It’s like lis
tening to a staged performance worthy of an Oscar nomination rather than the heartfelt prayer of a humble believer. Dear Gaaaaaaahhhhhhddddd. . . . Oh, please. Give it a rest. We are not impressed. Or the ones who seem to turn on tears at will. I have nothing against those who are sincerely passionate or emotional about something they’re sharing. But to those whose tears run like a faucet on some arbitrary timer, cued to start the waterworks at a given point in every sermon? Sorry. Not buying it.
Preachers come in all shapes and sizes and flavors. Some are dry as the Sahara, some are funny, some are excitable, some are readers. But the one thing I do not want to see behind the pulpit is an actor. Leave the theatrics at home, Pastor. Just be real.
Thankfully, God is far more interested in what’s in your heart. That’s why He beckons us to pray in private. He’s telling us to get rid of all the fluff, the flowery language, and anything else that might hinder us from pouring out our hearts before Him—and from listening to what He tells us in return.
And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. —Matthew 6:7-8
Speaking of babbling, you’ve heard enough of mine for now. How about we continue our discussion of excuses in the next chapter?
He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.
—BENJAMIN FRANKLIN