My nerves ratcheted up when the smile slid off his face and he stared at me intently. “I apologize for the surprise visit, but I really need to talk to you—to tell you something.” He wasn’t helping my racing heart rate, at all.
“Okay?”
Stepping closer, he slid his palm against my face, cupping it gently. “I don’t want you to give any credence to that crazy psychic lady. I have no idea what she was talking about, but I’m positive you will never hurt me.”
Relief poured through me at his words. “Thank you.” I leaned into his embrace. “That means so much to me. I could never hurt you.”
“Pick me, Kenna.”
I didn’t need him to clarify his meaning. I knew exactly what he meant. “I know you’re attracted to Jett, too, but I want you to know . . . no, I need you to know . . . I’m in love with you.” His eyes searched mine and I could see the hope and fear in them.
It didn’t matter. I knew what I needed to say to him. “Seth, I love you, too,” I replied.
A sigh of relief escaped him and he crushed me against his body, his lips meeting mine with almost frantic need. The moment they touched me everything inside me felt like it combusted. My whole form was quivering as his hand drifted lower, pressing me so tightly against him I thought I might melt inside him.
Winding my arms around his neck, I hung on tightly and kissed him back. Because the three of us spent so much time together, I didn’t spend a whole lot of time kissing either of them. While there were times they had both kissed me at the same time, it just seemed awkward to me. I didn’t want to make one or the other uncomfortable with massive displays of affection, so our relationship had been reduced to a lot of hand holding and snuggling. Not that I minded that, but I missed this—the way my body ignited when Seth kissed me—the way he made me feel like we were the only two people on the planet.
“I want you so badly I can’t stand it,” he said against my mouth. “It almost consumes me every time I think of you. I can’t sleep, I barely eat, all I can think about are all the ways I can make you mine.”
Something akin to liquid fire raced through my veins at his words and I pressed my mouth back to his, allowing him to devour me. I wanted to do as he asked. I wanted to give in and let him cross whatever lines he wished.
Kissing until we had to stop to catch our breath, he scooped me off my feet and carried me to one of the padded benches. Déjà vu washed over me as I remembered the first time we’d done this together and how hot it had been, even then. It was nothing compared to now, though. Our short time together had strengthened our bond even more. I’d never felt so extremely out of my element before; yet I loved every sensation he caused inside me.
Raising my hand, I lightly traced over his features, thinking that fate had indeed been smiling on me when it brought him into my life. I wasn’t sure how I lived without him before this, and I definitely didn’t want to live without him, either.
Kissing my fingers as they passed over his lips, he continued to gaze lovingly at me. “Be with me. Please. Just say it’s me and I’ll never leave your side. Ever.”
A groan escaped him as he lowered himself on top of me, pressing his mouth to mine, once more, before I had a chance to respond.
Again, passion flared hotly, begging for me to agree, begging for me to release whatever all these pent up emotions were inside. I wanted nothing more than to please him and give him everything he wanted.
Pushing away, my breath was coming in short gasps as I stared up at him. “I love you so much.”
He sighed and leaned his forehead against mine. “But?”
“I promised you both I wouldn’t cross any lines.”
Sighing, he sat up and shakily dragged a hand through his hair. “You’re in love with him too, aren’t you?”
Silence filtered between us, and my heart hurt for him—for me, for us. “I am,” I answered honestly.
He gave a wry chuckle and stood, walking over to the glass and staring blankly out. “I should’ve never agreed to this. I knew the whole thing could backfire.”
“You weren’t in love with me then, otherwise you wouldn’t have agreed.”
Giving an exasperated laugh he turned to face me. “So what do I do about it now?”
I twisted my hands in my lap nervously. “You walk away and let him have me—or you stay and fight for what you want. I’ll respect whatever your choice is. I just need more time. I’m so sorry.”
Striding toward me, he pulled me into his embrace, tilting my chin up sharply with his thumb. Heat flared in his gaze as he stared in my eyes. “Listen to me, Kenna Mangum. I will never walk away from you. Never. I intend to keep fighting until you belong to me completely. You are mine. I can wait until you see it.”
He placed another hard kiss against my mouth, and then he was gone out the door and I watched as he quickly scaled the wall and disappeared.
I had no idea how long I stood there rubbing my lips before I finally went out and reactivated the wards. Sleep wasn’t going to come easily tonight.
Chapter Twenty-Three
“Are you having a good time?” Seth asked, squeezing my hand affectionately as we lagged behind the rest of the group trying to find their way through the Willis Farm Haunted Corn Maze in the dark. I was pretty sure the entire football team and cheer line had showed up for this excursion.
Jett seemed to be having most of his time occupied by a pouty Megan, who still seemed determined to win him back, somehow. It didn’t bother me. I knew they needed to work things out between themselves and come to some kind of resolution. Every now and then I’d catch him glancing at me apologetically, but I smiled back, wanting him to know I wasn’t upset.
“Yeah, I’m having a great time. This is an awesome tradition you have.”
“We’ve all been doing this for years. October can’t leave without a trip to the Corn Maze.”
“I have no idea how they even cut the corn so it looks like a big picture from above. That’s incredible to me. I wouldn’t even know where to start cutting.”
“Pretty impressive thing to say,” he leaned in closer and lowered his voice, “for a witch. You could probably make this corn maze blindfolded.”
“That’s beside the point. Magic is all well and good, but you have to admire the artistry of people who don’t have it. Think of all the wonderful things that have been built or sculpted throughout the ages without the use of magic—simply created by awe-inspired human hands.”
“You’re right. There are some cool things.”
“Hey Seth! Check this out!” Billy Nash called out, gesturing for Seth to join them at the head of the group.
Seth smiled and briefly squeezed my hand before releasing it. “Be right back.”
Strolling leisurely behind, I smiled as I watched him shuffle forward through the group. All of a sudden the sound of a chainsaw roared through the air and everyone began shrieking and scattering in different directions, caught completely by surprise.
“Gotcha,” Jett’s hot breath filtered through my hair against my ear as he wrapped his arm around my waist and dragged me backward, off the path, several feet into a row of corn, until we were completely out of sight.
Squealing, I batted at his hands. “Put me down!” I said with a laugh. “What are you doing?”
Releasing me, he turned me to face him but in the dark, I could barely make out his outline. “I thought you might want to be kissed by a real man.”
Before I could respond, he gathered me into his arms and pressed his lips to mine. As always, the explosion between us was immediate and I sighed dreamily, leaning into him even more. He masterfully swept his tongue inside my mouth, tasting me deeply and causing every part of my being to clamor for more. I wanted to wrap myself around him and make a cocoon for the two of us to hide in.
Groaning into my mouth, he held me even tighter and I knew he felt exactly the same way as I did. Breaking away, he kissed my forehead, leaning his head against the top of mine. “
Is it bad that I want to forget all our bargains?” he asked, softly. “I want you so badly I’d lay you down right here in the dirt if you’d let me.” His lips slid tenderly down the side of my face and then recaptured mine, once more.
I was grateful he kissed me again. I didn’t know how to respond to his comments because my heart was literally being torn in two. Mentally I kicked myself for even agreeing to such a silly arrangement and my dad’s words of warning suddenly seemed to hit way too close to home. I was caught in a trap with no reasonable way of getting out without hurting someone—not to mention that choosing one of them over the other would be like letting half of my soul die.
Jett’s hands grew bolder, slipping under my jacket and finding their way against my bare skin at my waist. His kiss grew more intense as his hand slid higher, his fingers inching up my back, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. I felt like he was branding me as his with his touch.
“Jett,” I said, breaking away breathlessly.
“I know, dammit,” he replied. “I know. We all promised.” Leaning his forehead against mine I could feel the strain in his posture. “I don’t know how much longer I can take this.”
“I’m sorry.” I really meant it, not that it helped.
“How long is this going to go on?” His fingers still moved against my bare skin, making it difficult to think. “I need you, Kenna. I need you.”
It wasn’t exactly a declaration of love like Seth had done, but it still conveyed the same feeling. It was Jett’s way.
“I don’t know what to say,” I replied honestly.
He hugged me tighter, keeping that full body contact. “Say you love me. Say that I’m all you need.”
Bravely, I placed my hand on the side of his face, feeling the rough stubble on his face underneath. “I do love you, Jett. And I do need you.”
Sighing, he gave a wry laugh. “So close, yet so far.”
Guilt flooded through me. I hated making both of them feel this way. I wanted more than anything to be able to just choose, but I didn’t know how to give one of them up for good.
“I’m sorry,” I said, again, not knowing what else I could say.
“Don’t be sorry.” He kissed my forehead lightly. “As long as we have moments like this, there’s still a chance I’ll be the one you pick. As long as I have that, it’s enough—for now.”
“Thank you.” I sounded like an imbecile, but I was at a complete loss for words. “I know it’s hard. It is for me, too.”
“It doesn’t matter how hard it is. I’ll wait as long as you need. I just want you to be sure of your heart.”
“What if my heart doesn’t choose you?” I wasn’t sure why, but I always seemed to be able to ask him the hard questions. Maybe it was because of our rocky start; but sometimes I felt like we’d been through the rough stuff and I could talk to him more openly and freely than I could with Seth.
A half strangled laugh escaped him. “I guess I’ll just have to be settled with the fact that my girl is happy—even if it’s with my best friend.”
“Your girl?” I loved how those words sounded.
“Yeah, mine. Regardless of whose bed you’re in, I’ll always think of you as mine. I just want you to be happy.”
“Why?”
He snorted. “Because we always want the best for the people we really love.”
And there it was. My breath caught. “You love me?”
Laughter escaped him now. “Isn’t it obvious?”
“I don’t know . . . I mean you never said . . .”
“I just did. And in case you didn’t understand, then listen. I love you, Kenna. I will always love you. Ever since you came here you’ve been the reason I get up every day. It’s like you opened up a whole new way to live. You showed me I have other options and that the path I was on wasn’t necessarily the best way to go. You’ve given me hope for a better future than the one that’s planned for me.”
“You don’t want to be converted anymore?” I asked, surprised at this revelation.
“Not if that is going to keep me from you. I always want to be wherever you are.”
“Oh Jett. I want that, too.” This time I pressed my mouth to his, my heart swelling with his words. I couldn’t believe how close we’d grown so quickly and now I couldn’t imagine a world that he wasn’t a part of. I wouldn’t want to live in a world he wasn’t part of.
“Jett? Kenna?” Seth’s voice floated through the air. “Where are you guys?”
Giving a slight growl, Jett broke away from me. “We are so not finished with this conversation,” he whispered. “You hear me?”
I nodded and then wondered if he could see me. “Yes.”
He briefly pressed his lips to mine again before releasing me and moving away, raising his voice. “We’re over here, dude.”
A ball of witch light appeared between the rows illuminating us in our hiding place and Seth glanced between the two of us. “What’s going on here?”
“Nothing, man,” Jett replied.
“It doesn’t look like nothing to me.” Seth was clearly upset and I could feel the animosity growing between them.
“Says the guy who tried to convince her to ditch me last night,” Jett replied, and I couldn’t help my gasp.
“You know about that?” I asked, turning to Seth. “You told him about last night?”
“I haven’t said a word,” Seth said staring straight at Jett. “Somebody has been keeping tabs on us.”
Jett shrugged. “The first rule of competition is to always know what your competitor is doing. I’m just playing the game.”
“This isn’t a game,” I said hotly, infuriated.
Leaning closer, he pointed at me. “Oh, trust me, darlin’, this is a game and you’ve set yourself up as the prize. It’s too late to change it now. One of us has to win.”
“And it will be me,” Seth said assuredly. “So let’s just end all of this now.”
“Like hell. There is no way I’m giving up until I win.”
“Would the two of you stop arguing over me like I’m some damn trophy? There’s an easy way for me to fix this.” Shouldering past both of them I moved back out onto the path. “I won’t have anything to do with either of you.” I knew it was a total lie as soon as it left my mouth, but I was angry. “Don’t follow me. You two need to work things out between yourselves.”
~~~
The sound of the cars pulling up outside didn’t surprise me. I didn’t even look up when the door opened, continuing to stare into the flames dancing in the stone fireplace.
“We thought we might find you here,” Seth said.
I didn’t reply. The two of them came over by the couch but, wisely, neither of them sat; instead, Seth chose the hearth and Jett decided to sit on the floor, leaning against the wall.
This tiny abandoned cabin had almost become like our home away from home in the last few weeks. Glancing around, I noted the shelves filled with magical herbs and items, all brought here for working and exploring our magic, together.
Glancing between them, I felt tears rim my eyes. “I’ve been unfair to you both. I can’t choose. I can’t. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to. Maybe it would be best if we all walked away from this. The more we are all together, the more invested I become with each of you. I just don’t see this decision ever becoming clearer with time. I only see it getting worse. If we dissolve this now, then maybe we will still have a chance to recover and move on—to have some semblance of a normal life.” The words sounded hollow to me even as I spoke them.
“Bullshit.” Jett stared hard at me, his blue eyes glittering like ice. “We’re already too invested for that to work.” He sighed heavily. “Either way, it’s gonna be all screwed up. There’s no way around it.”
“Then I don’t know what to do.”
“We’ll do whatever we have to,” Seth said. “There’s no way around this and there’s no obvious solution; so why do we keep trying to force an outcome?”
&n
bsp; “Honestly? It’s because I’m feeling pressure from you both to take the relationship to the next level and I just can’t do that, don’t you see? That physical barrier is the only thing I have left—it’s the only thing keeping my heart from being a complete mess. I can’t sleep with both of you. Could you imagine what a disaster that would be? What if doing that made me realize that I did want one of you more than the other? What then? I make my choice and the two of you have to continue looking at each other knowing you both had me. What would that do to your friendship? Your future? It would eat at each of you—it would eat at me.
“This thing,” I continued, pointing around at all of us, “isn’t just physical or emotional, it’s magical. I think we’ve more than proven there is something about the three of us that makes us stronger together. Jett, you even talked about binding our powers to make a trifecta. That means the three of us would be tied together for life—for life! Do either of you really want to be tied to that, knowing you weren’t the one who was chosen? Knowing that for one moment in time you got to have me in your bed and you will never have me again?”
“I’d live on the memory of it forever,” Jett mumbled.
I was sure disbelief was etched on my face. “You’re telling me you’d rather live with that kind of pain for the rest of your life? You’d be willing to stare at me every single day knowing you could never have me, and that I went willingly with him?” I pointed at Seth.
Jett’s eyes never left mine. “That’s exactly what I’m saying.”
Eyes wide, I glanced at Seth and he nodded slightly. “It’s a risk I’m willing to take.”
“Well, I’m not!” I shouted, jumping to my feet. “I will not sleep with both of you and then spend the rest of my life with that memory constantly etched in my mind every time I look at you. How can I be solely committed to one of you while carrying that around?” I gave a frustrated grunt and moved toward the door. “I can’t do this anymore.”
“Kenna, wait!” Jett’s voice called after me and I halted but didn’t turn.
“What?”