“Douchebag,” Eva muttered, walking next to me.
Not bothering to argue with her, I stopped in front of them. "We’re ready to go, Ryder," I said over the music.
He looked away from the girl and a smile spread across his face. Oh, no, I knew that grin! Ryder was drunk.
“Maddie, baby!” he said, weaving unsteadily on his feet as he pushed away from the blonde and threw an arm around me.
He was so wasted.
“I can’t live without this woman,” he drunkenly told the blonde. She didn’t look too pleased as her heavily mascaraed eyes ran over me hatefully.
Ryder hugged me to his chest, making me bury my nose into his shirt. His hands ran down my back slowly as he nuzzled my hair.
"God, Maddie, you smell good," his deep voice rumbled.
Tingles raced along my nerve endings. This was too much.
“Let’s go, Ryder,” I said, detangling myself from his arms but still helping him stay upright. Lord, he was solid muscle!
He mumbled a goodbye to the blonde as we turned to leave. Getting through the club with him was no easy task. His arm stayed around my shoulders as he leaned on me heavily. He probably outweighed me by a good ninety pounds but somehow I got him outside.
“That girl offered to do things to me you wouldn’t believe,” he said, slurring his words.
“Gross, Ryder. Did you even know her name?” Eva asked, wrinkling her nose.
Ryder laughed and shrugged his shoulders. “Who friggin’ cares what her name was! She was willing to do anything with me.” His bloodshot eyes watched me. “But you wouldn’t know anything about that would you, Maddie?” He grinned a lopsided grin, full of mischievous. “I could always teach you. Would be my pleasure.”
I blushed a deep red. I knew it was the alcohol talking but the idea of doing things with him made my face burn with embarrassment.
Eva laughed loudly. “They say people speak the truth when they are drunk.”
I looked at her in disbelief. She wasn’t helping. Ryder didn’t need any encouragement.
In the truck, he scooted closer to me, brushing his leg against mine. I jumped, earning me another lopsided grin from him. Reaching past him, I turned down the truck’s A/C. Texas was fiercely hot even in the middle of the night. At least, that was my excuse for the heat burning through me.
~~~~
Back at the apartment, I dumped Ryder on the couch with annoyance. Seeing him with another woman completely ruined my night. I just wanted to crawl into bed and forget.
After a hot shower, I felt more like myself. But that was about to change. I was in my room, wrapped in a towel and searching for underwear, when he walked in.
“Sorry about tonight, Maddie,” he said, slurring his words. My tiny nightlight cast shadows on his face as he stood in the doorway.
“Sorry about what?” I asked, holding the towel tighter around me.
“Getting shit–faced. I know it bothers you. You’ve still never been drunk, have you?”
“No, still haven’t done that,” I answered. “Can’t say I want to either,” I added, watching him weave on his feet.
He smiled and staggered into my room. “Still a virgin in more ways than one, I guess.”
Redness flooded my cheeks. Now wasn’t the time to discuss this. I was naked. He was drunk. We were alone. I needed him out of my room. Pronto.
“Go to bed and sleep it off, Ryder.”
He ignored me and took a step closer. Leaning over, he kissed the corner of my mouth gently.
“Night, Maddie.”
Before I could react, he turned and walked away.
I stood in shock, trying to comprehend what had just happened. Ryder had never kissed me before. Ever. Yeah, it was a simple kiss but it seemed to mean so much more.
Crawling into bed, I discovered the urge to sleep had deserted me. I now had a different urge.
I now had desire.
~~~~
In the middle of the night, I woke up to movement in the bed. Drowsily, I turned over and found Ryder crawling beneath the covers next to me.
“What are you doing?” I squealed with alarm, suddenly wide wake.
“I can’t take another night on that couch. Go back to sleep,” he grumbled, lying on his side, facing away from me.
My body went on high alert when his leg moved against mine. I eased to the edge, putting as much space as possible between the two of us.
It was going to be a long night.
Chapter Four
I woke up alone. Glancing at the time, I groaned. It was too early.
After Ryder crawled in bed with me last night, I couldn’t sleep. I told myself that sharing a bed with him was harmless. He had been so drunk last night, he probably wouldn’t remember sleeping with me anyway. Or remember that kiss.
Loud, angry voices came from somewhere in the apartment, interrupting the visions of Ryder in my bed. What was going on? Jumping out of bed, I sprinted into the living room.
What I found was not what I expected. A half–dressed Ryder faced off with one very angry boyfriend. Ben.
I tried not to stare. I really did. But it was difficult. Ryder’s bare chest was tanned and ripped. There was not an ounce of fat on him, just a six–pack of muscles. Intricate tattoos started at his right wrist and covered one side of his body. Well–worn jeans sat teasingly low on his hips, leaving the rest to imagination.
I tore my eyes away from Ryder to look at Ben. No one had the right to look that perfect this early. He was wearing a blue polo shirt and starched khakis, looking well rested and GQ ready. I felt inadequate next to him. My ratty hair and wrinkled pajamas just didn’t compare.
“Who’s this, Maddie?” Ben asked, glowering at me from across the room.
“Ryder. The friend from home I told you about.”
“Yeah, her friend who was fucking asleep,” Ryder snapped.
“Calm down, Ryder, you’re hungover,” I said, stepping in front of him. He looked down at me with animosity, making me understand why no one messed with him.
Knowing I had to calm both of them down before the situation turned volatile, I grabbed Ben’s hand and pulled him into the kitchen. As soon as we were alone, Ben pulled me against him.
“I’ve missed you,” he said, lowering his head and kissing me. It felt forced. Cold. Not at all like the simple kiss from Ryder.
“Aw, hell!”
Ryder’s voice jolted me, breaking me away from Ben. He stood in the kitchen doorway, fully clothed and glaring spitefully at us. Shame made the blood drain from my face. Kissing Ben in front of Ryder felt…wrong.
“What the hell is going on? I’m trying to sleep,” Eva yawned, walking in around Ryder. She came to a standstill when she saw the three of us squaring off. “Oh, shit!”
I couldn’t have put it better.
“Ryder’s staying here for a few days,” I told Ben.
“He’s staying here? In your apartment?” Ben asked, growing louder with each word.
“You got a problem with that?” Ryder growled, taking a threatening step closer.
They stared at each other with hostility, leaving me standing in the middle.
“This is shit, Maddie! You have some guy living with you? Are you fucking him too?” Ben lashed out at me.
Eva gasped.
I was shocked. Ben had never talked to me like that before. Never.
Hearing Ben’s words, Ryder exploded. He pushed me out of the way and threw a punch, landing a blow to Ben’s face. Ben’s head snapped back and he fell against a chair, toppling it over. He recovered quickly and went after Ryder, hell bent on taking him down.
Eva screamed and I scrambled to get between the two of them. Before I could, Ben swung at Ryder’s side, pummeling his ribs. I winced at the sound of a fist connecting with solid muscle. Ryder didn’t seem to notice. He raised his arm for another shot to Ben.
I saw my opportunity. I had to stop this madness. Without thinking of the danger, I pushed myself between
them.
“Listen to me, Ben!” I shouted, smacking his chest to get his attention. His expression was so full of hate that I wondered briefly who it was directed at; Ryder or me?
“You need to calm down! Ryder’s just a friend!”
“Don’t play games with me, Maddie,” he hissed, grabbing my arm and jerking me toward him.
“Get your damn hands off of her!” Ryder roared, wrenching me away from Ben and purposely stepping in front of me.
Eva pulled me safely to her side. “You okay?”
I nodded, refusing to take my eyes off of Ryder and Ben.
“She’s my girlfriend, asshole! I’ll put my hands on her if I damn well want to!” Ben yelled, getting in Ryder’s face.
Deciding I had enough, I shook off Eva’s hand and tried to push my way between the two of them again.
Ryder was having none of it. His hand snapped out, stopping me with his palm flat on my sternum.
“Touch her like that again and you’re a dead man,” he told Ben with a coldness that made me shudder.
Ben scowled at me. I wanted to cringe from the loathing I saw in his eyes but I refused to back down.
“Why don’t you go and we’ll talk about this later?” I asked him in a shaky voice.
Ben nodded and started to walk out of the kitchen when he stopped abruptly in front of me.
“Love you,” he said with a smirk. Without waiting for a response, he threw Ryder a cocky, go–to–hell look and left. We stood motionless in the kitchen until we heard the front door slam shut.
“Oh my God, Maddie!” Eva exploded. “What got into him?”
“That’s your boyfriend?” Ryder frowned at me. “Great guy.”
“Not now.” I moved past them and headed to my room, shutting the door behind me.
My mind raced as I got undressed. Never before had I seen Ben so possessive. I shuttered, remembering the way he grabbed my arm. Ryder was prone to fighting and had a bad attitude but he never scared me. Ben did.
Feeling a little agitated, I flung my clothes across the room. When my door banged open, hitting the wall, I yelped and quickly grabbed a shirt to cover myself.
“Knock much, Ryder?”
He froze in the doorway. His eyes moved over my panties and barely covered breasts. I watched as he swallowed nervously.
“Sorry.”
When he looked away, I hurried to put a bra on and pull a shirt over my head. Keeping my eyes on him, I slipped on a pair of shorts.
“Okay, you can look now,” I said, pulling my hair up into a messy ponytail. I watched as he gingerly walked further into my room, one hand on his ribs. “You okay?”
“Yeah, the asshole got lucky,” he said. “I’ll be fine."
"I don’t know what got into him."
Ryder scoffed sarcastically. "He just walked right in this morning. Does he have a goddamn key?”
“Actually, yeah, he does.”
“Really? Because he shouldn’t. He’s a shithead.”
“He’s not a shithead,” I said, pausing a second, the wheels turning in my mind. “Did you say something to him?” I asked, cocking my head to one side. Ryder was a master at causing trouble.
He leaned against my dresser and crossed his arms over his chest, defiant.
“I said I slept with you.”
“You WHAT?”
“I told him the truth. I did sleep with you. He had such a cocky attitude when he walked in the door that I had to put him in his place.”
My mouth fell open in disbelief. “He doesn’t have an attitude, Ryder, that’s you.”
Ryder scoffed. “Whatever. The guy’s a jerk. How many times has he grabbed you like that?” he asked. “Let me see your arm,” he demanded, pushing off the dresser and reaching for my arm.
I moved out of his reach, not wanting him to touch me, not wanting to feel the heat his hand would cause.
“He’s never hurt me before. He was just angry.”
“I don’t care if he was pissed, he better not touch you like that again.” He clenched his jaw hard. “I don’t think you should see him anymore. He’s dangerous.”
I stopped searching for my running shoes to look at him. Did he not know how dangerous he was? Ryder could break a girl’s heart within minutes of meeting her. He could make a girl believe she was his world then walk away without a second thought. And he was lecturing me on danger?
"I don’t think I need your opinion on who I date.”
“Oh, I’m sorry! I forgot, you can give your opinion on the girls I date, but I can’t do the same?”
“You don’t date girls, Ryder, you sleep with them. There’s a difference,” I said, irritated. I really didn’t want to have this conversation. Sitting down on the edge of the bed, I pulled on my running shoes. Glancing up, I caught Ryder rubbing a hand over his face in frustration.
“I don’t want to fight, Maddie. I just don’t want you hurt by some jackass.”
I finished tying my shoes and stood up. “I won’t let anyone hurt me, Ryder. You know I’m tougher than I look.”
“I just hope you can handle that jerk.”
“If I can handle you, Ben will be a breeze.”
Before the last word was out of my mouth, Ryder closed the distance between us and grabbed my long ponytail in one hand. Pulling me gently by the hair, he tugged me closer.
“I would rather you handle me. I won’t hurt you,” he rasped, looking deep into my eyes. His hand moved from my long hair to the back of my head.
“Stop it, Ryder,” I whispered, breathlessly.
“Stop what, Maddie?” His voice was so husky it made my heart skip a beat.
I ignored the humming in my body and rolled my eyes at his question. He knew what he was doing. He knew all the moves, all the right things to say and do. He probably used them on every girl he met. And I wasn’t going to be another sucker for a hot body and smooth words.
“I’m going for a run,” I mumbled, leaving him standing in my bedroom. I needed to put some distance between us. If I didn’t, I might say screw it and do something rash, like kiss my best friend.
~~~~
I ran. As my legs covered the miles, the fresh air cleared my mind. By the time I returned to the apartment, I decided the whole thing was silly. Ryder and I were friends. That was all. A little attraction and some innocent flirting wasn’t going to change that.
By the time I returned to the apartment, everyone was gone. Eva was at work and Ryder was nowhere to be found. I should have been relieved to have a few hours alone but instead I found myself wondering where Ryder was and when he would be back.
While I was running, Ben texted me numerous times, apologizing and begging to have lunch with me. I wasn’t ready to face him yet but knew we needed to talk. So I agreed to meet at a little sushi place by campus.
He was, as always, a perfect gentleman. He apologized profusely for fighting with Ryder and believed me when I said we were only friends. When he asked about Ryder sleeping in my bed, I assured him that nothing happened. I was able to convince him that there was nothing between Ryder and me. Now, if I could only convince myself of that maybe things would return to normal.
I was enjoying my California roll and trying to act normal around Ben when my phone beeped. My heart raced when I saw who the text message was from — Ryder.
Where r u?
I started typing, peeking up at Ben once.
Me: w/Ben
Ryder: Asshole. Ur not alone w/him r u?
Me: No
Ryder: Good. U deserve better.
Hmmm. Should I? I started typing again.
Have someone in mind?
Staring at my phone, I waited. There was no response. What had I been thinking? I wanted to kick myself for sending that text. Then my phone beeped.
Me
I was still staring at the text when Ben reached out to take my hand. Forcing a weak smile, I slipped the phone back into my purse.
“You okay? You’re shaking,” Ben sai
d, covering my hand with his.
“I’m fine.”
“So about the frat party? Will you be there tonight?”
“Sure,” I answered. I smiled at Ben again but my mind was on the text.
Me. One simple word that had my heart racing and my stomach doing flips.
~~~~
After lunch, I returned home and found Ryder on the couch watching television. Empty beer bottles were scattered on the coffee table and he was working on another.
“Why are you drinking this early?” I asked, taking a seat beside him.
His bloodshot eyes glanced over at me. "I’m bored without you here,” he answered, taking a swig of beer.
I wanted to ask about the text but couldn’t get the words out. I was being a chicken shit (Eva’s words not mine).
Not sure what to say to him, I glanced at the TV. He was watching the national news. Scenes of soldiers boarding planes played out while a frazzled anchorman reported from a foreign location. In big, bold letters, the words "USA AT WAR" flashed across the bottom of the screen.
The images reminded me of why Ryder was here — to enlist. The thought made me ill. If the United States was going to war, he would leave faster than I thought. What would I do without him? I took a deep breath, not wanting to think about it anymore.
“So Ben invited us to a frat party tonight but it looks like you started early,” I said, pointing to all the beer bottles.
“I can’t be around that shithead.”
“Well, I’m not going to leave you alone,” I said. “You’re going.”
He stood up, towering over me. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea, Maddie. When I’m around you…" He took a deep breath and started over. "Things are getting weird between us. It’s probably best that I stay here.” Without elaborating, he walked away, heading for the bathroom.
Apparently, I wasn’t the only one confused on what was going on between us. My dad always said that if something was bothering you, don’t ignore it. Deal with it. And that’s what I was going to do. I jumped up and rushed to the closed bathroom door before I could change my mind.