“And that will keep you an honest man Mr. Blakeshire. Talk to her the way you talk to me and you can’t go wrong.”
His grin nearly took my breath away. It was so unexpected. “Hmm,” he murmured. “Does my ex have any dating tips for me?”
“Ex?” I repeated, rolling my eyes.
“Poor choice of words.” He admitted.
“I know for sure now that we are not meant to be—that in the past we never were.” I assured.
“Because you found a twin.” He said with a nod, obviously over the argument that I was right all along.
“No. I’m darkness. That is why we always destroyed each other in the past.”
He smirked. “Sure you are.”
“I’m not trying to prove a point or pick a fight. I was giving you a point to bring up to Madison. She is pure light. The two of you will balance. You won’t hurt her—drain her.”
“I can’t hurt someone that will not let me near them.” His tone was harsh as he stepped away from my pondering stare.
“Any blind man can see that Madison and her friends have a closed circle. Break into it. If you gain the trust of the others, you will gain hers.”
He smiled disdainfully. “I’m breaking into that circle, not for her benefit, but for Draven’s.”
I wasn’t surprised he’d found a fondness for Draven. Oddly, they reminded me of each other in some way.
“Are you going to protect him?”
“I’m going to teach him control. He will be able to protect himself.” His placid expression told me that even though he was going to teach Draven control, he wouldn't go any further than that. He didn’t want to let anyone else in. Drake had closed himself off from almost every soul in the universe.
“He needs you. They all need you.”
“My theory,” he murmured, letting his gaze fall over me, “is that we all need each other.”
“Promise me you’ll open yourself up, let her see the real you. The one I see right now.”
An embarrassed grin invaded his addictive image. “And how am I supposed to do that?”
“You’ll figure it out. I shouldn't be the only one that sees that side of you.”
“Are you telling me to live a little?” he asked with an allure in his eyes.
Before I could answer, he stepped closer to me and reached for my chin. Suddenly, the room erupted into flames.
Drake’s eyes moved to the flames, then to me as he let out a sigh and let his hand fall. “You better wake up. He knows you’re here. Let’s not test the man while he’s in transition.”
Before I could question him, my eyes flew open and I found myself lying in Landen’s arms. His eyes were gently closed, but his humming skin was on fire.
“Are you awake?”
His only response was his arms pulling me tighter and his thumb urging my chin up to his lips. I kissed him tenderly at first, but then my hungry lips divided his, wanting to be closer. I wanted him to wake up, to hold me, talk to me, but I felt the strength in his lips fading, ignoring my protest. His kiss halted as he fell into a relaxed sleep.
Frustrated, I rolled to my back and stared into the darkness. I knew that Drake would send someone to where we were, that our family would not be worried about us. I didn’t think I needed them to help me with Landen anymore. I just didn’t want them to worry. I was more than sure that by now they knew what had happened to Clarissa and Dane, that Charlie must have told them, and time apart would be good. In some way, we would blame each other for this loss.
My goal was to undo it, turn this loss into a gain. I didn’t want anyone beyond me and Landen to see Dane the way I saw him last night, and if Clarissa was in the same condition, that would only add salt to the open wound. Brady, Marc, and the others would go insane with rage.
I twirled my ring, wondering if I could somehow go back. Save them. Stop that bus.
No matter how much I focused on that thought, I could not open the door the looking glass was supposed to give me. That was beyond frustrating.
As my wandering thoughts drifted, I stretched out my senses. Hope piqued in me when I felt someone familiar: Nana. I carefully maneuvered my way out of Landen’s relaxed arms.
I was careful not to open the door all the way. I could see daylight beneath the frame. I didn’t want it to wake Landen. He still needed his rest.
I followed Nana’s emotion to the right, then further down the hall. The home opened into a humble kitchen. Nana and Saige were seated at a square cedar table.
“Why didn’t you wake me?” I said to Saige, interrupting their quiet conversation.
“You were asleep, and Guardian’s energy would not let me touch you.”
At first what she said didn’t register, then I realized she was referring to Landen. I knew that was his name in his first life, but I didn’t know that was the name by which she called him.
“What time is it?” I asked, noticing that the light seeping in from the windows looked weak, as if the day had aged.
“Time for you to take a shower and get something to eat,” Nana said, standing. I went to protest, but she went on. “Every time I see you and Charlie, I have to make you eat. It’s a shame, really. I’m too old to follow you through this universe. Respect your body, and it will protect you.”
Saige grinned sheepishly, clearly enjoying how at ease Nana was with me.
“Where is Evan?”
“At the movie set with his friend. Shower,” she said, handing me a small duffel bag that must have been sitting at her feet.
“Top of the stairs,” Saige added.
I gripped the bag and turned to follow the orders I was given, silently cursing them under my breath.
The floor in the old house creaked as I made my way to the stairs. As I climbed them, I felt odd breezes of cool air. I halted and looked all around me. I knew the energy was ghostly, but it was harmless. At least for now.
I wasn’t in the mood for a long, steaming shower, so I found myself rushing through the common bathroom task. More than once, I caught myself holding my breath when my thoughts would chase my dread. I was afraid to feel anything, to let my emotions hurt the city around me. I was going to have to find a place where I could think and feel in peace. The paranoia was suffocating my soul. That couldn’t be good.
Before I found Nana once again, I peeked in on Landen to find him resting calmly. I sighed before I went to the kitchen.
Nana was setting a large bowl of soup on the table next to the toasted sandwich that was already there.
“I think I need to go get my father. I want to make sure Landen is okay,” I announced into the room.
Saige was at the antique stove, stirring a large pot. “You need to learn to break your ties and merge with Guardian. He’s fine. He will rise with dusk, and that is best. The light will hurt his eyes for at least another day.”
“I have no reason to trust you,” I rebutted.
“You have no reason not to trust me either,” she threw back at me.
Nana cleared her throat, nonchalantly calling an end to our bickering. Saige turned the stove down, then made her way outside through the door to the left of the stove.
“Sit. It’s getting cold,” Nana said to me.
Finding comfort in her company, I muttered, “They hate me,” as I sat at her command.
“They don’t hate you,” she assured me as she took the seat across from me.
“Could have fooled me,” I said after I tasted the warm soup.
Nana leaned forward and let her chin rest on her aged hands. “They’re not your family. I admit they hold grudges, but grudges are temporary.”
I let my spoon rest and twirled my ring on my finger. The daylight dimmed immediately. “I just want to hit the ‘Restart’ button.”
Nana nodded for me to pick up my spoon again. Grudgingly, I complied, knowing that if I ate, she would help me.
“We only look back to learn from our mistakes, not undo them. They are a solid part of our being n
ow.”
I glanced down. “They opened his eyes. He will know every time I strayed.”
“You didn’t stray. Sometimes lust blinds us.”
Hearing that word coming from such an innocent, older woman caused me to halt before I took another bite of the toasted sandwich in my hands.
“I have spent several hours with Saige. I’ve met Phoenix. The past was not entirely your fault. Landen tried to break the cycle of natural order when he became a Phoenix. That is the only reason he found you in the arms of another.”
“That’s what I don’t understand. The natural order should have had me in his arms with each life.”
“Sometimes we have to lose something to understand how precious it is. My grandson learned that lesson the hard way.”
“Draven,” I assumed.
Her stare confirmed it for me. “He was furious with us for moving away, but I knew that distance made him appreciate Charlie all the more. We came home to the states two years ago, and even though he only saw Charlie a few days out of each week and the summers, they had already fallen into a routine. They both thought the other would always be there, and that is good, but what is not good is falling so deeply into complacency that you forget to be grateful. He lost her when she forgot him. He had to find a way to open her heart, and because that lesson was firmly placed on his soul, he will think twice before he lets their love become comfortable.”
“I think he’s going to be fine. My friend Drake is going to help him.”
“I saw,” she offered, but there was no comfort in her emotion.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“Something is.” As soon as I said that, the daylight pouring into the kitchen dimmed.
“They will resolve it. My grandsons are seeking individuality. It’s not the first time. Growing up as a twin is harder than it seems.”
I really didn’t know what to make of her words. Aden and Draven seemed fine when I saw them before.
“I’m sorry you flew all the way here. I think it all worked out, at least for now.”
“I’m not. I’ve learned so much.”
“Like what?”
“There is a doorway here, one Draven will have to open for you, for your friend Dane, or so the whispers say.” She glanced around. “I also know that coincidences are footprints to fate.”
She grinned at my curious expression.
“Evan’s friend has been filming on the location that Draven would have to play to open that door...has been for almost two years now.”
I was starting to question how long I’d been asleep. I didn’t know what door she was talking about or how she could have managed to set up a concert for Draven to play at in just a few hours.
“Draven’s band has to play to open a door and where he has to play is the same place that one of your friends has been filming? Seriously?”
She smirked. “Very. Let me really blow your mind. The boy’s song is used in that film. The entire crew has not only heard it a million times, but they love it. The energy Draven would need has been building, waiting for him to take them over the edge, and I would bet you everything I own that Draven doesn’t know they are still expecting him to play. He never completely agreed to play it because of everything going on with him and the others.” Her eyes smiled. “And until this moment, you didn’t even know you needed Draven to play...I doubt you know what door to open.”
I tried to swallow her words. She’d been here hours and figured out what would have taken my entire family days, weeks. I glanced around at the empty room with curious eyes, slightly envying that I could not hear the secret whispers of the dead.
“What did the dead tell you? What door?”
She slightly pursed her lips. “Their message is never clear. I’m under the impression that two realities reside side by side, that this reality is sick. The dead and living have been used to feed a fierce addiction to seven deadly emotions. All of you have several ways to weaken fierce Escorts, and opening the door, letting the trapped damned fall, is one that will help you unravel this web.”
Seemed simple enough to me, besides the fact that there had to be more than one soul like Donalt that I would have to fight. Then I remembered how Phoenix told me the dead were mad at me.
“Are the dead on our side?” I whispered, as if the dead could not hear my low tone.
“They are on their side. They don’t want to help you. They want their family back.”
“What do I have to do? Go get Draven and the others?”
“That, I don’t know. The friends you lost are but one part of this. Where my grandchildren fall, where you fall, is unknown. I would suggest that you learn control over your insights so you can find the answers you seek.”
I pushed my food away, unable to take another bite. “Phoenix thinks I’m some kind of key, that I can seek images on that side, even pave a path if we all must bail. And to do that, I have to figure out how not to feel any emotions so I don’t destroy the place I’m standing in, and open a door to my images again, which I can’t do without feeling emotions—catch twenty-two. Control will not help me figure that out.”
“You can’t do anything worthwhile without emotions.”
“Who gives a Scorpio an insight balanced on emotions anyway?” I muttered disdainfully.
She laughed under her breath. “You can control this.”
“It leaks out of me, as Phoenix so poetically put it.”
That really made her laugh, which made me smile and the sun behind the windows beam.
“You’ve learned a lot in the last three months. In a past life, those insights took you a lifetime to master on their own,” she gently explained as her gaze spilled all around me. “The lessons were in place and set to be repeated, but these lessons were only learned in the lives with Landen. When he became a Phoenix, the next cycle, lesson, was never received. Now, all the insights are going to appear in this lifetime and will seem overwhelming.”
“Not overwhelming. Impossible.”
“The only impossibilities are the ones we choose to believe.” Her voice trailed, which caused me to halt my comeback.
“What?”
A second later, she answered me. “I was trying to understand how you controlled this insight you fear so much.”
“Any luck?”
“It would be easier to show you, but I don’t suppose we have time for that lesson as well.”
She was talking about seeing, and she was right. I didn’t want that lesson. Trying to look back had done nothing but bring me heartache in the recent past.
She collected my dishes. “Come,” she threw over her shoulder. She set the dishes in the sink and made her way to the door.
I wasn’t thrilled to follow her out there, not if Saige was around.
The backyard was a lavish garden of every kind of herb, flower, and plant you could imagine. Saige was nowhere in clear sight, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t lurking somewhere out here. I felt her placid emotion close by. Nana pulled out the patio chair for me sit in, then pulled up one in front of it.
“Now,” she said, her emotion piquing with hope as she sat down, “we are going to go back to the aura lesson you learned.”
“Crash course was what that was. I don’t even notice them anymore.”
“You feel it, though. You move your energy like a weapon.”
“I need to work on that, too.” My tone was laced with embarrassment. My temper, not my mind, moved my energy.
She leaned forward as if to make her words even more private. “Yesterday, you had the power to stop both of those boys, but, as you put it, you leaked it out everywhere, your reserves were dry.”
I wasn’t very fond of being powerless around Phoenix, and the idea that I could stop him the next time he tried to pin me somewhere was more than appealing.
“Let’s find the leak in this sinking ship, then.”
“Agreed. Now do what you do when you see auras.”
&nb
sp; I leaned back in my seat. Her request wasn’t hard. It was just a shift with my eyes.
When I brought the image of auras to my line of vision, I was surprised to see everything around me was crimson. I felt like I could taste that shade. It was a musty iron flavor that settled around my gums, one that more than likely had been there all the while, but I’d failed to notice until this point.
I thought that color meant anger or passion, but I was sure there was more to it. In a way, it did look like I was bleeding into the air, and the lingering taste in my mouth confirmed that.
The sun dimmed instantly with my grief.
“You see it?” Nana questioned.
“Unfortunately.”
Ignoring me, she pressed on. “Pull it to you.”
“It’s me. How can I pull it?”
“I have no idea. That is what you were told the first time around. Pull it to you, ask it to dwell in your soul with you.”
I sucked in a deep breath. My half-hearted thoughts asked the energy to come to me, then I saw a wave move across the sea of red, hope spread through me causing the sun to brighten. With a wide stare, I asked again, this time with more effort. The red grew denser, maybe smaller. I knew I could see Nana more clearly through it now. I sat up straighter and humbly pleaded for the energy to rest in my soul. In that instant, the red shrunk, then fell into my skin.
I swallowed the bitter taste in my mouth. Inside, I felt a warm, burning sensation welling in my soul. It was so powerful that my head spun, causing me to lean forward.
“Hold it,” Nana demanded, standing and letting her hand rest on my back. “It’s yours. Hold it in.”
With my squinted eyes closed, I saw a million storms; the rush of the wind, the blinding strikes of lightning, the rumbling of the thunder. It felt like my soul was on a roller coaster. I was sick and dizzy all at once.
“Hold it in. If you lose your lunch, I’ll make you eat again,” Nana taunted.
I began to tremble, falling deep inside myself. I wanted stillness. My thoughts begged the wind to stop, the thunder to quiet itself, but it refused. It was as if begging was making it worse. Its laughter at my weakness resulted in a fiercer storm within me.
“It’s a part of you, Willow. Find peace with it,” Nana’s voice echoed around me.