Which left her with what, exactly?
"Um, Lila." Beau snapped his fingers in front of her eyes. "You okay?"
"Oh, I'm great," she said, glaring at Beau for all kinds of reasons, starting with the fact that he was right there. "Fan-fricking-tastic."
Beau sighed, and the sound ignited something in Lila.
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"Tell you what," she threw at him, so mad her teeth snapped together. "You stay right here and keep sighing like that. It's so helpful. I'm going to take a cab to San Jose and get your stupid piece-of-crap Escort. Then I'm going to keep driving after the Santa stalkers."
"Fine," Beau said, his blue eyes narrow. "I can--"
"Alone!" Lila yelled at him. "I'm going alone! How about you just go back home and sit in your basement and be as judgy and nasty and angry at the whole world as you want!"
Beau was staring at her like her head had just exploded. She knew she was too loud, and bordering on hysterical.
"Whoa," he said, with infuriating calmness, holding his hands up in surrender.
The gesture made her want to curl into a ball, watch really depressing movies like Titanic, and cry for the next three weeks.
Which she couldn't do even if she wanted to, because she had less than twenty-four hours to find Cooper and drag his behind back to L.A. Less than twenty-four hours, if she was realistic. Her parents would likely come home before midnight on Christmas Eve.
"Give me your keys," she snapped at Beau.
"You can't be serious."
She let out a loud groan of frustration. "Beau!"
He reached into his pocket, and pulled out his keys. His eyes
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searched her face, like there was something he was looking for. Like there was something obvious she was missing.
Lila snatched the keys from his hand. Then she turned away and started marching across the campus. Her heels drummed into the ground as she walked, faster and faster, like she could somehow make things better by putting distance between herself and the latest, worst problem.
But she couldn't deny the emptiness she felt when she looked behind her and saw that Beau wasn't there, like she half-expected him to be. He wasn't following her. He didn't care about her.
He was letting her go.
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Chapter 13
*** STANFORD UNIVERSITY
PALO ALTO
DECEMBER 23
2:45 A.M.
***
Of course, there were no cabs. Lila didn't know what she'd been thinking. Why would taxis cruise a college campus? It was hard enough to get a taxi in Los Angeles. As she trudged across the campus, Stanford seemed less ideal with each step. Big stone buildings leaned together like whispering friends, mocking her loneliness. Dark, empty lawns mirrored what her life had become. And the clock tower overhead signaled that with every passing second, Cooper was getting farther away--and with him any hope she had of rescuing what remained of her life.
Tick tock, it hissed. Tomorrow night is getting closer and closer to tonight every minute.... Like she needed the reminder.
Just then, a cab pulled into view and stopped at the curb just a few yards ahead of Lila.
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"Thank you!" Lila murmured, sending a little prayer of thanks up to whatever benevolent spirit was finally looking out for her. More of this, please! She ran toward the cab while two obviously drunk sorority girls tried to climb out of the car, shrieking with laughter.
A honk sounded from behind. Frowning, Lila twisted around, just as a familiar black Maxima slid into view. Her stomach twisted.
Erik had come for her?
Had he seen her at the party and realized the enormity of what he'd done? Was he about to beg for forgiveness? Beg her to take him back?
And the million-dollar question: Would she?
As the car pulled to a stop, Lila peered inside, expecting to see Erik's blond mop. But the driver had jet-black hair and wore a hoodie.
"Beau?" Confusion washed over her.
"Get in," he said, his gaze connecting with hers.
"I'll get in, cutie!" the drunk girl on the sidewalk called. "Is he cute, Ashley? He sounds cute!"
"He's cute," her friend replied. "But why are you still lying there?" she asked the girl collapsed on the sidewalk with her clutch beside her.
Lila stepped toward the driver's window of Erik's car.
"Isn't this...?" She drifted closer. "This is Erik's car, right?"
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Beau just looked at her.
"But--"
"I saw his keys when we looked in his room earlier," Beau said, his chin sticking out almost defiantly.
"So you just..." She gestured wordlessly at the car.
"I went back and grabbed them," he said. "He deserves to lose his car after what he did to you."
Lila felt a warmth in the pit of her stomach. In a way, he was saying he'd stolen Erik's car for her. It was the sweetest thing she'd heard all night. The irony of that made her want to laugh, or maybe cry.
Beau clearly interpreted her silence as disapproval, because he continued talking, like he was laying out his case.
"Also, we've already lost time," he said. "We'll lose even more time if we have to double back to San Jose to pick up my car. The train isn't going to wait for us."
Lila smiled. "I like the way you think," she said and climbed inside.
There was the familiar leather and pine smell. The usual fuzzy dice hanging from the rearview mirror, which Erik had always claimed were a joke. There was a stack of CDs in the well between the seats, probably classic rock like Journey. It was more than a little strange to be in Erik's car without Erik--not to mention with Beau. But then Lila remembered the way Erik had jammed his tongue in that girl's mouth, and decided it wasn't so strange after all.
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"I don't know why I'm surprised," she said as Beau guided the Maxima toward the campus exit. "Grand theft auto kind of goes with the whole antisocial, edge-of-society thing you have going on."
He shot her a slight grin before returning his attention to the road. They were the only car on the road, and all the traffic lights were blinking yellow.
"I love that you see me that way," he said. "Especially when it couldn't be further from the truth"
"Are you claiming you're not antisocial?" Lila shook her head in mock disbelief.
"There's a difference between being antisocial and just having other stuff on my mind," he pointed out. "It's possible to not care about the latest North Valley High scandal without it being a statement."
"If you say so." Lila looked down at her lap. "Anyway, thank you for stealing a car for me."
Beau laughed softly, hanging a right. "It wasn't just for you. I'm trying to get Tyler back, too, you know."
"Sure," Lila said. Of course Beau wanted to get his little brother home, safe and sound. "But your mom is so much cooler than my parents. She'll forgive you."
There was silence for a moment. Beau gazed out the windshield into the inky black night, following the signs to the highway. "The divorce has been really hard on her," he said
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after a moment. "She's not exactly the person you remember. I think if she finds out that Tyler's halfway across the country, she'll lose it."
"What do you mean?" Lila asked, frowning. "Is she okay?"
Beau shook his head, his hands clenched the steering wheel. Lila thought she noticed a smudge of red on his right hand, but decided it was just the glow of the brake lights from the car in front of them. "My dad completely bailed," he said matter-of-factly. "It turns out that all that crap he used to tell me about how to be a man and a 'responsible adult' was a lie. We haven't seen him in almost two years."
"Oh, Beau, I'm so sorry..." Lila whispered, stunned.
"I guess leaving my mom for some model-slash-actress-slash-whatever wasn't enough for him," Beau continued. His voice didn't sound bitter, though, just resigned. "He hasn't paid a cent in child support, and my mo
m doesn't have enough money to hire a lawyer"
Lila thought about the time Mr. Hodges had made her a bologna sandwich after she'd fallen off the monkey bars in Beau's backyard. He'd given her a glow-in-the-dark Band-Aid and called her scrapes battle scars. Her brain had trouble reconciling that Mr. Hodges with the now absentee one. She couldn't imagine how Beau pieced it all together.
"Did he move far away?" she asked.
Beau laughed, but it was a hollow sound. "He lives exactly
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fifteen miles away in Sherman Oaks. It's not that he's unreachable. He just wants to pretend he's some young guy with a hot trophy wife and a fast car. An ex-wife and two kids would kind of ruin all that."
"God," Lila said. She absently grabbed the fuzzy dice off the mirror and squeezed them hard. "That's so disgusting."
"My mom is a wreck," Beau said simply as he turned onto the ramp to the highway. "She works all the time. She's never home. She tries to hold it together for Tyler, because he's too young to know how tough things are. He can barely deal with the fact that Dad won't return his phone calls."
"He's just a kid!" Lila cringed at the familiarity of her words--it was exactly what Beau had said when she'd threatened Cooper with Santa's demise. Her cheeks flushed with shame.
"I don't care so much for me," Beau said, shrugging. "But it kills Tyler. He thinks it's his fault. Which only makes my mom worry more. So I've pretty much taken over Tyler duty. It's seriously the least I can do, since she doesn't want me to get a job. She thinks I should concentrate on school, be a kid, whatever." He shook his head.
Lila squeezed the dice even harder, not sure what to say.
"We have our system down," Beau said, sounding brighter. He switched lanes, passing a car going fifteen miles under the limit. "I do the whole breakfast thing, get Tyler to school, pick him up, do all that after-school stuff. She's working two jobs
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during the week, but still, it was working out okay--until my grandmother wiped out on her steps last week and broke her hip."
"Oh, no," Lila murmured.
"That's where my mom is right now," Beau said. He stretched his arm out along the car window and smiled slightly. "This is all a really long-winded way of telling you why I really don't want the police involved in this runaway-brothers thing either. She doesn't need one more thing to worry about."
Lila's heart panged in her chest, and her fingers itched to reach out and hug Beau, to tell him it would be okay. She imagined him getting breakfast ready in the morning for his mom and brother, packing Tyler's lunch and making sure his shoes were tied and his socks matched. No wonder he seemed so much calmer, so much more grown-up. It was what he'd told her back at his house when she'd asked when he'd turned into Mr. Maturity--he'd had no choice.
"Okay, so no police," Lila said. "For now, at least. Although our brothers may leave us no other option."
A smile twitched at the corner of Beau's mouth. "Tyler's pretty cool for a kid. And I have a sneaking suspicion that your little brother might grow up to be a criminal mastermind." Lila laughed at the idea. "But I refuse to believe that two eight-year-olds who still believe in Santa can consistently outwit the both of us," he said.
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"Oh, yeah?" Lila said mildly, remembering the boys' impish waves from the San Jose platform.
"For one thing, we have an iPhone."
Lila laughed.
"And for another, we're actually working together now," Beau pointed out. Lila looked over at him. His eyes were blue and bright. "Which means we have a shot."
"Yeah," she agreed, smiling. "I think we do."
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Chapter 14
*** I-5 NORTH
OUTSIDE OF SEATTLE
DECEMBER 23
4:02 P.M.
***
She was at her favorite Malibu beach, but it was changed, somehow, so that the water of the sparkling Pacific Ocean was as warm as the California sun overhead. She knew that if she dove in, the water would be as welcoming as a bath. But she wasn't near the water--she was leaning back against his chest, happy and safe in his arms. She could feel him behind her, his skin warm in the sunlight, and warmer still against her own.
She sighed and settled back against him. She tipped her head to the side and felt his mouth move in a beguiling line down the stretch of her neck. She didn't have to see him to see him--those bright blue eyes, that inky black hair, the delicious smirk he always seemed to wear
Wait a minute Beau?
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Lila woke up with a start.
Her heart hammered against her chest, and she looked around wildly, trying to make sense of the fact that she was in a moving car--not on a beach--though it seemed almost as bright. And much, much colder. Quickly, the events of the previous day came back to her. Cooper. Santa Claus. Erik. The endless road trip. Beau.
Beau, who, if she closed her eyes again, she could feel holding her like he had in her dream, his lips tickling her skin, sending shivers up and down her body.
She turned her head to see Beau smiling at her from behind the wheel. Same bright blue eyes. Same inky black hair. Same delicious smirk.
"Hey," he said.
"Um. Hey." She felt shy and silly. Leftover dream confusion, she told herself.
"Good morning," he said. He laughed. "More like good afternoon."
"Afternoon?" Lila shook her head and couldn't help a yawn. She reached to cover her mouth just in time. "Where are we?"
"The last sign I saw said we were only about twenty miles outside Seattle. We're making really good time."
"How long have I been asleep?" Lila asked, blinking. A little bit of research on Beau's iPhone back at Stanford had told them the last train to leave San Jose would take twenty hours to reach
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Seattle, thanks to its various stops along the way north. But it would only take them twelve hours by car. Lila had directed Beau to Route 101, headed north, and taken the wheel just as soon as they'd gotten through San Francisco. The last thing she remembered was staggering into a bathroom in Ashland, Oregon, in a complete daze. She and Beau must have switched places again after that.
"A while," Beau said. "You missed Portland."
"Oh, bummer," Lila said. He cocked an eyebrow questioningly, and she shrugged. "I always wanted to see Portland. What was it like?"
"Cold," Beau said. "I mean, it looked cold. I didn't get out and personally investigate or anything."
It hit Lila then that Beau had spent untold hours next to her while she slept, and who knew how gross she was in her sleep? Did she snore? Drool? Oh, God--what if she'd drooled all over herself? Not that Beau would care. She knew he wasn't that kind of guy. Even if she had drooled all over herself, he'd probably just think it was funny.
She sat up and flipped down the passenger mirror. Needless to say, after an entire night and half a day cooped up in the car, she did not look her best. There were luggage compartments beneath her weary-looking brown eyes. Her SoCal-tanned skin looked pale and dry. And, oh God, her hair. She'd mastered the art of the blowout because her long, dark hair, if not properly
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tamed, exploded into something one could only call wild animal. What was staring back at her from the mirror was a safari of wild animal hair.
Lila attempted to minimize the damage. She smoothed her terrifying hair into something more like wild curls, and rummaged around in her bag for a little bit of lip gloss.
"Please tell me you have gum," Beau said. "My mouth tastes like the last truck stop."
"Ew," Lila said, but she found her pack of Extra Mango Smoothie gum and handed it to Beau.
"Now my mouth tastes like a tropical truck stop," he said a few minutes later. Lila giggled.
The drive into Seattle was pretty. The winter day was cold and sharp. Beau had jacked up the heat inside the car to compensate for their southern California clothes. She stared out the windows as they approached the city. Elliott Bay gleamed in the afternoon l
ight, with the snowcapped Olympic Mountains rising in the distance. The Space Needle poked up like something from The Jetsons. The huge red cranes down on the waterfront gave way to the city, and before Lila knew it Beau was pulling up in front of the Seattle Amtrak station. The building was made of red brick and boasted a gorgeous tower that Lila thought looked out of place on a train station.
"Don't go anywhere," Beau said. He put the hazards on, and grinned at Lila. "I'll be right back."
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Lila gasped at the slap of cold winter air that rushed into the car when Beau opened his door. He slammed the door behind him, but the cold remained. It was seriously winter in Seattle. Cold that even her dad would acknowledge as true winter cold. The snow on the ground was real, unlike those faux-winter scenes that Los Angelenos set up on their otherwise green and healthy lawns, beneath their palm trees. She shivered into her leather jacket, which was not going to stand up well to any real kind of chill.
A few minutes later, Beau jumped back into the car, rubbing his hands together.
He turned the heat up higher, the air rushing at them from the vents. He looked over at Lila, his blue eyes sparkling and his cheeks slightly red from the outside air. "Their train is on time--which means we have about six hours to spare."
"Six hours?" Lila laughed. "Surely you mean six seconds."
"Nope." His mouth curved into a smile. "Six hours to kill before the little monsters roll in. More than enough time to figure out how to murder them."
"I thought you were on their side," Lila reminded him, raising an eyebrow. "All that stuff about how they're just little kids?"
"That was before I had to chase them up the coast into the Pacific Northwest," Beau said dryly. "It's amazing how a nine-million-hour drive will change your opinion on things."
"It really is," Lila said, and then felt shy again when their
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gazes met and his eyes seemed so impossibly, breathtakingly blue. Something warm bloomed inside of her and spread. She made a face to cover her embarrassment, and gestured at Seattle, spread out in front of them like a Christmas card through the windshield. "So...," she said awkwardly. "What are we going to do for the next six hours?"