He stops on a dime and looks back and forth between us with narrowed eyes. Just when I’m sure he’s going to ask what’s going on, he says, “Can we go now?”
“Let’s go,” Zack confirms. Seth and Thor run out the back door toward a big garage beside the barn. Zack and I take our time with our coats and boots, gloves and scarves. He tugs the ends of my scarf until I’m plastered up against him so he can steal a quick kiss. “Not gonna be able to do that for a while.”
“I think you’ll survive it.” I shake my head and chuckle when he pushes his fingers into my hair and combs through it.
“Let’s go before I carry you upstairs, sugar.”
“Dad, are you coming?” Seth yells from inside the garage. He’s already opened the big door and is standing next to the snowmobiles. “Can I take Grandma’s? Please?”
Zack looks between Seth and the smaller of the four snowmobiles sitting in the garage.
“I don’t know, Seth . . .”
“I’ve driven it a lot, Dad. I know how to drive it. I’ll be very careful, I promise.”
“No showing off,” Zack warns sternly.
“No way,” Seth agrees and hands me a pretty purple helmet. “You can wear Grandma’s helmet.”
“Thanks.” I slip on the helmet and Zack helps me buckle it under my chin before securing his own helmet, then checks to make sure that Seth’s is secure as well. Zack pulls the smaller snowmobile out of the garage and sets it up for Seth, then pulls a bigger two-seater out for us.
“Are you ready?” Zack hops on and pats the backseat for me to join him.
“Let’s go!” Seth exclaims and drives away carefully.
I wrap my hands around Zack’s waist and hold on tight as he sets off after his son. Thor is running through the snow beside his boy, grinning happily. We drive through an empty pasture, where Seth makes several circles, laughing loudly.
His face is red from the cold and bright with happiness, and my stomach clenches at the sight of him. He looks just like his dad, and the change in him from when he first came here is remarkable.
Zack parks and laughs at Seth as he plays in the snow. Thor chases him, barking and bouncing.
“He’s wonderful,” I tell Zack honestly.
“Yeah, he is. I’m getting him his own snowmobile for Christmas.”
“Oh, he’s going to love that.” I grin happily and lean my cheek against Zack’s shoulder as we watch his son with the happy dog. “He’s the perfect age for it.”
“I agree. Plus, it’s my first Christmas with him in a long time. I want it to be special.”
Seth makes a wide circle, then drives toward us, and when he’s about ten yards away, he makes a sharp turn, sending snow spraying up onto us.
“Oh that’s cold!” I laugh and wipe the snow off my face with my glove.
“And he’s just declared war.” Zack laughs and hops off his seat, scoops up some snow, and throws it at his son, hitting him square in the face.
Seth stops, shuts off his vehicle, and we all proceed to have a snowball fight. Seth hides behind his snowmobile, throws snow, then ducks back for safety.
“You can’t hide forever!” I yell just before Zack stuffs a handful of snow down the back of my jacket. “Ooh, Zack, you’re a dead man.”
I chase Zack down and tackle him in the snow. It’s knee-deep and difficult to run in. My plan to smear snow in his face once I tackle him backfires when he rolls me onto my back and tickles me mercilessly.
“Stop!” I cry, giggling so hard it’s impossible to understand the word.
“I’ll save you, Jill!” Seth cries and jumps on his dad’s back, knocking him off me. I scramble to my knees and scoop up snow and throw it at Zack, hitting him in the face.
“My hero!”
“That’s right!” Seth laughs and then tosses a snowball for Thor to chase after. “I saved her.”
Zack runs after Seth now, lifts him up off the ground and spins around, then dumps him in the snow.
“You ganged up on me,” Zack accuses.
“Well, duh,” I reply with a smirk.
“You’re the one who told me not to pick on girls, Dad.” Seth rolls his eyes and lies back on the snow, panting. “This is fun.”
I join Seth, lying on my back, looking around at the trees around the pasture. “Are there bears out here?”
Seth giggles. “They’re hibernating.”
“What about mountain lions?”
“The snowmobiles scared them off, if there were any,” Zack informs me.
“What about Bigfoot?”
Both boys grow quiet and I look around to find them both smiling at me.
“You’re such a girl,” Seth accuses and giggles again. “There’s no such thing as Bigfoot.”
“I’ve seen movies on TV that say there is,” I inform him. “There’s footage.”
“There’s footage of a moron in a gorilla suit, Jilly,” Zack says with a laugh.
“Okay, what about wolves?”
Seth glances around with suddenly sober eyes. “We had wolves last summer.”
“There aren’t any here now,” Zack assures him.
“Are you really afraid of animals?” Seth asks.
“Nah, I just wanted to know if there were any.”
“Good.” Seth tosses a ball of snow in the air and sputters when it falls into his face.
“That was smart.” I laugh. “What goes up must come down.”
Thor lies next to Seth, tongue hanging out as he pants happily.
“It’s so quiet out here,” I comment and watch my breath come in feathery puffs. The earth is still around us. Every once in a while, a patch of snow will fall off a tree branch, but aside from our breathing, that’s the only sound.
“So this is turning to naptime in the pasture?” Zack asks. “I thought we were going to ride snowmobiles.”
“Let’s go!” Seth jumps up and tightens the strap on his helmet before sitting on his vehicle.
“I want to drive.” I bat my eyes up at Zack. “Please.”
“Have you driven one of these before?”
“Of course,” I scoff. “You can sit behind me and hold on tight.”
Seth starts his engine and Zack leans in to speak directly into my ear. “I know how I’d like to hold on to you, sugar.”
“Stop.” I giggle and glance over at Seth, who is happily driving in circles and calling out to his dog.
“He’s not paying us any attention,” Zack replies with a smile. “And I kind of like that blush on your cheeks.”
I shake my head and climb on, start the engine, and motion for Zack to climb on behind me.
“I’m ready,” he says with a smile in his voice.
“Hold on!” I call over my shoulder and then set off across the pasture. Seth whoops and follows. We drive past an old, huge tree, circle around, and head back the way we came. Poor Thor is getting tired, so Seth and Zack switch places. Seth holds on to me and Zack pulls the dog up on the seat in front of him, caging him with his arms, and we all ride back to the garage.
“That was awesome!” Seth exclaims as he hops off. “You drive pretty good for a girl.”
I pull my helmet off and shake my hair out, laughing. “Gee, thanks. I think. You drive pretty well for a little kid.”
“I’m not little,” he disagrees and stands next to me when I climb off the seat. “See? I’m as tall as you.”
“You are getting tall. You’re going to be as tall as your dad and your uncle.” I push my fingers through his dark hair and smile at him. “And just as handsome.”
“Dad’s not handsome.” Seth winces and sticks his tongue out. “He’s the ugliest ever.”
“And now you’re grounded for a year, brat.” Zack chimes in.
Seth laughs and pats his dog on the head. “No I’m not.”
“Are too.”
“Not.”
“Admit it. I’m good-lookin’.”
“You’re gross!” Seth laughs and runs out of th
e garage toward the house.
“Did you have fun?” Zack cups my face in his hands and lowers his head to kiss me lightly.
“I had a great time.”
“Stay for dinner.”
“I should go home before it freezes up again and I’m stuck out here.”
Zack sighs and drags his thumb over my bottom lip, sending shivers down my spine. “We’ll eat early. I promise.”
“Well, twist my arm.” He smiles and pulls me out of the garage, locking up behind us, and leads me back to the house. Seth and Thor are already settled in the living room. Seth has stripped out of his wet gear and is sitting on the floor, controller in hand, playing a video game. Thor is curled up snoring before the fire.
“Jill! Come play with me.”
“Do you need help with dinner?” I ask Zack, but he’s already shaking his head no. “Go play. I’m just going to put on a pot of chili and mix up some corn bread. Nothing fancy.”
“Just call me if you need me.”
“Will do.” He kisses my forehead and then leaves me alone with his son.
“What are we playing today?”
“LEGO Batman,” Seth replies and passes me a controller.
“No racing today?”
“We can race if you wanna.” He shrugs, like it doesn’t matter at all to him.
“No, this is fine. I’ll watch you first and be player two.”
“Okay.”
We scoot onto our bellies and Seth teaches me how to maneuver around the LEGO world of Gotham City.
“Ha!” I exclaim and offer my fist for a bump. “This game rocks.”
“You’re good,” Seth admits with admiration. “You’re a fast learner.”
“Thanks.”
“Are you guys having fun?”
I glance back over my shoulder to find Zack leaning against the back of the couch.
“How long have you been there?” I ask.
“Long enough to see you kick my son’s butt at this game.”
“She did not! I let her win.”
“I creamed you, squirt.” I laugh evilly, climb to my feet, and stretch my arms up over my head.
“Rematch!” Seth declares.
“Dinner’s ready,” Zack says and shakes his head.
“Rematch after dinner!”
“I have to drive back to town. I don’t want to get stuck out here again.”
“It’s cool out here.” Seth wanders into the kitchen to scout out dinner, leaving Zack and me alone. Thor wakes and trots after his boy, not ready to let him out of his sight yet.
“Yeah, it’s cool out here,” Zack whispers and kisses my cheek.
“You know I can’t stay.”
He sighs and nods, takes my hand in his, kisses my knuckles, and then leads me into the kitchen.
“Smells great, Dad.”
Seth and Zack set the table and move easily about the kitchen together, clearly used to their own special rhythm. I can picture them like this every night at dinnertime, and a part of me yearns to be a part of it every day.
And that’s just silly.
Isn’t it?
“What did you and your friend do this weekend, Seth?” I ask as he sits at the table and Zack sets a pot of steaming chili on a cast-iron trivet and then sits next to me.
“Mostly annoyed his older brother.” Seth shrugs and then grins. “He’s sixteen and has a girlfriend. So we stole his cell phone and made prank calls to her.”
I cover my mouth with my hand and do my best not to laugh, but I can’t help the giggle that escapes. “That’s not very nice.”
“He got us back.”
“What did he do?” Zack asks and passes me the corn bread.
“He spit in our sodas.” Seth shrugs like it’s no big deal and I cringe. “We drank them anyway.”
“Ew.”
“Don’t do that again, Seth.” Zack chuckles and covers his face with his hand.
“It’s just spit.”
“We’re at the dinner table,” Zack reminds him sternly. “Don’t talk about that here.”
“You asked.” He shrugs again and slips a piece of corn bread to Thor. “Other than that, we played games and watched TV and stuff.”
“Did you have fun?” I ask.
“Yeah, Josiah’s mom made cookies and she let us eat them when they were still hot from the oven.” He sets his spoon in his bowl and frowns up at Zack. “I don’t think Mom ever made cookies.”
Zack stiffens beside me and I lay my hand on his thigh. He clears his throat. “She didn’t like to cook much.”
Seth nods and then frowns again. “Jill, do you like to cook?”
“Yeah, when I have time to.”
“Do you make cookies like Josiah’s mom and Grandma?”
“Sometimes. I like to make sugar cookies at Christmastime.” I grin, an idea forming in my head. “Speaking of which, it’s almost Christmas and I haven’t made any cookies yet this year. Maybe you and your dad can come to my place sometime soon to make some.”
“Can we, Dad?”
I glance up into Zack’s deep brown gaze and smile encouragingly.
“Are you sure?”
“Of course. I can’t eat all those cookies by myself.”
“Cool.”
“Thanks,” Zack murmurs with a grin. “That sounds like fun.”
For the rest of the meal, Seth fills us in on happenings at school, and reminds his dad that baseball tryouts are in March.
“Yes, I know. You’ve told me five times, and March is still almost four months away, so we have plenty of time.”
“I don’t want you to forget.”
“Trust me, I won’t.”
“Okay.” Seth slurps his chili and when he’s finished, he immediately rinses his bowl and loads the dishwasher. “Are you finished, Jill?”
“Yes, thank you.”
He clears the table, loads the dishes, and then stops next to his father.
“Can I go back to my game, Dad?”
“After you hug me.”
Seth rolls his eyes, but hugs his dad tight around his neck.
“I’ll see you soon, Seth. I think I’m going to head home.”
“Okay. Thanks for playing with me.”
“I had fun,” I say and smile widely, meaning every word.
Seth and Thor walk into the living room and within seconds we hear the game resume.
“I’ll walk you out. I don’t want you to get stuck driving on icy roads.”
“I don’t want that either,” I reply while Zack helps me with my jacket. He follows me out to my car, waits for me to throw my purse inside and start the engine, then pulls me into his arms. He tucks me against his chest and rocks me slowly back and forth. His heart is beating steadily against my cheek and he smells so delicious, I just want to climb him.
“I had the best weekend I’ve had in a long, long time. Thank you for that.” His words are softly spoken against my head. He presses a kiss to the crown of my head and leans back to look into my face.
“I enjoyed it too. Thank you for everything.”
“I’m not quite ready to let you go home.”
I chuckle and push my fingers through his brown hair. “It’ll be okay. Go spend some time with your boy. You obviously missed him.”
He nods and kisses my forehead. “I’ll call you tonight to check in. I want to see you this week.”
“Yes, sir.” I offer him a mock salute and then smile softly. “I’d like that too.”
He kisses me sweetly, then holds my door open for me.
“Text me when you get home. I’ll worry.”
I nod and wave before putting my new car in gear and pulling away from Zack’s house, knowing full well that everything has changed.
I’m falling for those two men.
CHAPTER
Eight
It’s been three days since I spoke to Zack. I called when I arrived home from the ranch Sunday night to let him know I was safe, we spoke for a few minutes, an
d that’s been it.
My phone isn’t malfunctioning. I called my cell carrier to check.
Pathetic.
On my way home from my last home showing of the day, I call Cara.
“Hello?”
“Hey, please tell me you’re still in town.”
“I’m just leaving the school now. What’s up?”
“Wanna come over to my place for coffee? I have information that I’m pretty sure you’ll enjoy.” I pull into my driveway and bite my lip. I’m going nuts. It’s time to bring in the girlfriends to yank me back from the ledge.
“Sure. Should I pick Lo up on my way?”
“Sounds good. I’ll put the coffee on now.”
“See you in a few.”
I tromp through the freshly fallen snow and into the house. Thank God it’s warm in here. Whatever magic the furnace guy used has worked.
I set the coffee on, change out of my work clothes into jeans and an old sweatshirt, and pile my hair into a knot just as my doorbell rings.
“We’re here!” Cara calls.
“And we brought brownies!” Lauren says in a singsong, making me grin.
“You’re lifesavers,” I assure them and lead them into the kitchen. I pour us all a cup of coffee, set cream and sugar on the table, and we dig into the brownies without plates or forks. They won’t survive long enough for that.
“So, what’s going on?” Lo asks around a large bite of chocolaty goodness.
“I’m being a girl.”
Cara rolls her eyes and sips her coffee. “Oh good. ’Cause you are a girl.”
I sit back in my chair and lick chocolate off my lip. “I sort of have news.”
My friends share a glance and then both lean in closer to me.
“Spill,” Lo commands.
“I slept with Zack.”
They blink at me for a moment before breaking out in wide grins.
“You owe me twenty,” Cara tells Lo. “I told you it would happen before Christmas.”
“You had a fucking bet going on whether or not I’d bang Zack?”
“Of course. The sexual chemistry between you two is off the charts. It was just a matter of time.” Lo shakes her head.
“When did you say it would happen?” I ask her.
“I thought you’d hold out until New Year’s.”
I laugh and then shrug, already feeling better. “Well, it happened.”