He was almost home and exhaustion was really setting in. His eyelids were getting heavier by the second. He kept blinking hard to keep them open.
Just a couple of blocks from his house, his cell phone rang, jolting him back to life. He grabbed it from the passenger seat and frowned when he saw it was Eric again.
“Hey, man.” Angel could hear Romero going on in the background but Eric, or something, was muffling the phone and he couldn’t make out what he was saying.
“You home yet?”
“No,” Angel said. “Almost.”
“It is her, man,” Eric said.
It took a moment for it to register. “Sarah?”
“Yeah,” Eric said. “She’s with a guy.”
Angel’s heart thudded to a standstill. He had to pull over, so he could think… breath.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, it’s her.” Eric sounded almost apologetic.
Angel fell back in his seat but still squeezed the steering wheel. He swallowed hard, not wanting to believe. “Where?”
“Some greasy spoon off of Proctor,” he said. “I’d never even seen this place before.”
“She still there?” Angel sat up straight. It suddenly hit him that Eric wasn’t talking about seeing her earlier. She was still there with another guy.
“Yeah,” Eric said. “They’re in there eating. They were holding hands when they walked in, and I don’t know how much longer I can hold this guy back. He’s ready to run in there now.”
“No, no, no!” Angel put the car into gear. “I’m on my way. How do I get there?”
Angel’s mind raced. How long had she been doing this? He thought of all the Saturdays she worked and he’d never even questioned it. The rage ripped through his veins, and he welcomed it. It was a familiar emotion that he at least knew how to deal with, and it helped numb the pain.
She’d completely blindsided him and he felt ready to tear someone apart. He stepped on the accelerator. He’d have his chance soon enough.
***
Sydney and Sarah drove for a while, with Sarah deliberately directing him into streets she and Angel never frequented. She saw a small café in the middle of one of the small streets that was still open. “There.” She pointed.
Sydney frowned. “Are you sure?”
She wasn’t, but it seemed perfectly discreet. Definitely not somewhere anyone from school would be hanging out. “Yeah.”
He held her hand as they walked in almost guardedly. There were only two other people in there and they were sitting together, yet it still took a while for the elderly waitress to come around and take their order.
Sarah took advantage of the time to ask more about Carina. She was determined to catch up on all of it, every little detail. She was still feeling terrible that he hadn’t been able to share anything about it with her. Even after their food came she continued to grill him, at times feeling moved and holding his hand across the table. How had she missed it all?
Finally, they finished, Sydney insisted on paying. He put his arm around her shoulders as they walked out the door. She leaned on him, her eyes at the floor, and then she looked up. Her legs almost gave out when she saw Angel. The bitter repulsion in his eyes was undeniable. He glared at Sydney then very slowly turned until his eyes locked on hers.
“You been working, Sarah?”
CHAPTER 21
Even as Angel drove into the parking lot and seen the yellow Impala parked in front of the café, he’d held out hope that this was all one big mistake.
He parked next to Eric’s car where he saw Eric and Romero standing. Eric motioned to the window of the café as Angel approached them.
It was her. And she looked unbelievably seductive. She sat there gazing attentively into another guys eyes. Angel watched, disgusted as she reached across the table and held his hand, and he noticed her cleavage was out there like he’d never seen it before in public.
Eric and Romero filled him in on how they spotted the car leaving the beach and followed them to this secluded hole in the wall. Sarah wasn’t stupid. She just hadn’t counted on dumb and dumber seeing her.
Now, standing here looking at her startled eyes, he searched for answers. Her once beautiful green eyes, that normally gazed at him so brightly and with such emotion, were almost gray. And all he saw in them was fear and what looked too damn much like guilt.
It felt unreal, like some kind of weird nightmare. He sized her up and down, taking in the provocative dress she was wearing. For a second he thought he was going to be sick. Then he heard him talk.
“It’s not what you’re thinking, man,” the guy said.
Angel charged forward ready to rip him apart, his voice boomed. “How the fuck do you know what-"
“Stop.” Sarah jumped in between them.
Angel stared at her, a red haze of pain and anger nearly blinded him. Was she protecting this guy? He squeezed his fists tight.
“Angel, I’m sorry, I should’ve told you this a long time ago.”
Angel’s heart sank. A long time ago?
“This is Sydney.”
Angel’s mind went blank. He stood there, heart hammering away. He took a step back. “Sydney?” He stared at her then back at the guy.
“Yeah,” she said. “I meant to tell you from the very beginning but you’d just assumed he was a girl, and I know it was stupid of me but…”
Her words buzzed in his ears. There was only one thing he could hear. It was screaming in his head. All this time, she had another guy waiting for her back in Arizona. He shook his head and backed away.
“Angel, please.” He saw her tears but it didn’t matter. Something squeezed his throat and he struggled to get the words out. “This is who you’re going back to live with?”
Sarah stepped closer to him. He flinched, not wanting her to take another step. Romero and Eric stood behind him speechless. As the reality of it settled in, the anger inundated him.
“This is who you’ve been talking to everyday?” He raised his voice with every word. “This is who you can’t fucking live without?”
Sarah clasped her hand over her mouth for a brief second. “Angel, please, you don’t understand. Let me –”
“So, what? He’s been coming down here every Saturday, Sarah?”
“No!”
“Is this what you call working?”
He stalked away, again feeling like he was going to be sick. He didn’t want her to see just how deeply she affected him. Not anymore.
Through the corner of his eye, he saw her coming toward him.
Angel didn’t need to hear anymore. Whatever she had to say didn’t matter. It was all too clear.
“Angel,” she said. “Hear me out, please.”
“It doesn’t matter, Sarah.” He stopped and glared. “Unless you can tell me it’s not true, that you’re going back to live with this guy, that he’s who you’re leaving me for, I don’t need to know anything else.”
“I’m not leaving you for anyone-”
“Bullshit!”
Sarah froze, and he started to walk away again. He’d lost control and needed to get out of there before he charged at Sydney.
“He’s my best friend, Angel.”
The words felt like a blow to his stomach. He stopped and turned around. “Really, Sarah? 'Cause I thought I was.”
He blinked hard in a desperate attempt to hold the tears back. He turned his face away, panicked that she’d see him cry.
“You’re more, Angel.” She tried to grab his hand but he snagged it away. “He’s just been my friend for so many years. Everything I told you about Sydney is true. We’re like family. You have to believe me.”
Angel clenched his teeth. He thought of the way she’d gazed at Sydney in the café and held his hand at the table. The way she’d leaned against him as they’d walked out. That dress. That dress, that screamed come and get me, and she’d worn it for Sydney. Like family? Did they really think he w
as that stupid?
He didn’t want to ask but he had to know. “You love him, Sarah?”
When she didn’t answer immediately, he knew and it tore him apart. It was all he could take without breaking down. He had to get out of there, fast.
“Go,” he said. “You’re free to be with him without lying and sneaking around.”
He rushed toward his car.
“Angel, you have it all wrong,” Sarah cried. “Please, don’t do this.”
He hurried his step, barely making it to the car when the tears assaulted his eyes. Never in a million years would he have believed a girl could make him feel like this. He could barely see as he backed up. He zoomed past Sarah who was still standing there crying, and onto the road. He wiped away at his eyes, annoyed that they kept coming.
It all made sense now. She’d been lying all this time, and she hadn’t told him she loved him because she couldn’t. Couldn’t, because she was in love with Sydney. How could he have been so blind? Had she slept with him too? He jerked the car off to the side of the road, opening the door just in time to be sick.
***
“I have to go after him!” Sarah pleaded, as she ran toward Sydney. An older couple walking to their car stared at her with concern. The tears streamed down her cheeks and she knew her face was a mess, but she didn’t care about any of that. She pulled her cell phone out of her purse and started dialing Angel’s number frantically.
“I wouldn’t, Sarah.” Eric said as she walked by him.
Sarah turned to look at him and tried to catch her breath. “But I have to.”
Eric shook his head. “I’ve known Angel all my life and I’ve never seen him like that.” “Yeah, no shit.” Romero said. “That was bad.”
Sarah wiped her face and tried desperately to regain her composure. “But that’s why. That’s why I have to talk to him and explain. He just doesn’t understand.” She turned to Sydney. “Please take me to him.”
“Whatever you want, Lynni.” Sydney put his hand on her shoulder.
“Who the fuck’s Lynni?” Romero asked disgusted.
“Hey, easy.” Eric frowned. “I’m just wondering did she lie about her name too.” Romero started back toward their car without waiting for an answer. Sarah wanted to scream. I didn’t lie! But she had, and she deserved this. All of it.
“Hey, that’s her middle na-” Sydney began to say.
Sarah touched Sydney’s arm. “It’s okay. It doesn’t matter.”
“Yeah it does. He’s calling you a liar.”
“It is what it is.” The disappointment in Eric’s eyes was inimitable. He turned without saying good bye, and walked to his car.
Sarah could feel another wave of tears setting in. “Let’s go, Syd.”
She broke down again, as soon as she sat in Sydney’s front seat. It was worse than when she’d cried earlier. Earlier she’d cried out of fear, fear of seeing Angel so out of control, fear of her complete inability to make him understand, but now she was crying out of anger; Angry that she’d been stupid enough to let it get to this.
Eric was right, she decided. Now was not the time try to explain, especially not with Sydney there. She’d wait until the morning to call him. By the time they reached her aunt’s house she was drained, emotionally and physically. She sat there looking out the window at the moon not wanting to move.
Sydney squeezed her hand. “Let’s get you inside.”
Sydney spent the night on the living room sofa and left early the next morning. The next couple of days were torturous. Sarah called Angel at least five times a day and sent him endless texts, all with no response. She couldn’t believe how unreasonable he was being. He didn’t even want to try to talk it out? Sarah sat on her bed staring at her cell phone. It had only been two days since she’d last seen him and she missed him horribly. Didn’t he miss her too? If it was the other way around she would’ve already given in and answered his call. Could all his talk about him loving her so much have been a lie? Or maybe he just realized he couldn’t possibly love a liar. There was a soft knock at her door. The door was open and Valerie stood at the entrance pouting. “How we doin?”
Sarah shook her head and pressed her lips together, looking back at her phone. She was so sick of crying but just looking at Valerie’s sympathetic expression brought a lump to her throat. Valerie sat next to her on the bed and hugged her. She squeezed her tight for a second then let go and patted Sarah’s leg. “Alright, so, he’s being a jerk. Give him time. He’ll get over it.”
Sarah wasn’t so optimistic. Valerie hadn’t seen him that night. “No, I really think he hates me now.”
“Are you kidding? I’m sure he’s still totally whipped. But expect him to maybe want to… you know, play games.”
Sarah looked at Valerie who avoided making eye contact. “What do you mean?”
Valerie stood up and walked over to Sarah’s desk. “You know guys are stupid.” She picked up a pad of paper and a pen. Then came back and sat down again next to Sarah. She kept her eyes on the pad of paper and began to doodle.
“You hurt him, and maybe you know; now he’ll try to hurt you back. It happens. It’s immature yeah, but—”
“Valerie, what are you talking about?” She put her hand on the pen so Valerie would stop doodling. “Do you know something?”
Valerie’s eyes finally met hers and she took a deep breath. “Not really, but I talked to Alex.”
“And?” Sarah could feel her insides tightening up. “Well, just so you know, Alex is worse than Angel so he really thinks you did Angel wrong. He had the whole story all mixed up, the idiot.” She began doodling again. “He thinks you were cheating on Angel this whole time and Syd’s been your boyfriend for years.” Sarah squeezed her eyes shut and braced herself. When she glanced down, Valerie was doodling furiously. “What else did he say?”
Valerie stopped doodling but didn’t look up. “I just got off the phone with him. He said he was glad Angel was having lunch with Dana today.”
It hit Sarah like a ton of bricks, but strangely she wasn’t totally surprised. She’d always known in her gut that there was more to Angel and Dana. No wonder he wasn’t missing her.
Valerie touched Sarah’s hand. “Hey, she’s the most annoying person on the planet. There’s no way he could be into her. It’s so obvious what he’s doing.”
Angel wasn’t that immature. Sarah couldn’t see him playing games like that. But she could definitely see him being hurt and needing to reach out to someone. Someone that would make him feel better, and of course he’d picked Dana. Sarah stood up. She’d been thinking about it since yesterday. This just sealed the deal.
“I gotta get out of here.” She pulled the suitcase out from under her bed.
“Where you going?” Valerie asked. “Back to Arizona, where I should’ve been all this time.”
CHAPTER 22
Angel waited impatiently for the light to turn green. He was already regretting having agreed to this. But he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Dana’s call that night. Breaking up with Sarah was without a doubt, the hardest thing he’d ever done, and he wanted to make sure he wasn’t making a mistake. But when he called Dana this morning she insisted she wanted to talk to him in person.
Alex agreed to cover for him at the restaurant. Even telling him to take his time and enjoy. As if he’d be able to enjoy anything the way he was feeling. He hoped Dana would keep it short and to the point. He was in no mood for much more. He was so tired from the lack of sleep the last couple of nights, and just thinking about Sarah made him want to bang the steering wheel.
He picked Dana up and she announced she wasn’t very hungry, but she could go for coffee so they went to Starbucks. She talked all the way there, but not about anything he wanted to hear. As soon as they got their coffee, he cut to the chase.
“So, let’s have it.” He said. “What were you talking about, Saturday night when you called me?
“Angel,
I didn’t know you didn’t know anything. I’d hate to cause problems-”
Angel waved it off. “We’re done. It’s over between her and me. I just wanna know what you were talking about.”
Dana seemed surprised. But suddenly her eyes were full of compassion. “I’m so sorry to hear it.”
Angel fought the urge to roll his eyes. They’d been there all of five minutes and he was already losing his patience. “Saturday, Dana.”
“Oh, okay. Well, I didn’t see them, but I got a call from Lorena asking me if I knew what was going on with you and Sarah.” She fidgeted with her napkin. “She was calling from Lujan Beach and said Sarah was there holding hands and making out with some guy.”
Angel could feel it happening all over again. The rage seared through his veins. “Making out? Are you sure?”
“Well, I think that’s what she said.”
Fuck He should’ve known better than to think he’d get a straight answer from Dana, especially about Sarah.
“It’s important Dana.” There was no masking the irritation in his voice.
“But I thought you said you two are broken up.”
“We are.” He raised his voice, then stopped to take a drink of his coffee, give himself a second before speaking again. He decided to play nice, it might calm him down. He reached over and put his hand on hers.
He strained to speak calmly. “It’s a pretty big detail, Hon. I’m just trying to get it straight.”
She smiled at his hand on hers. “Well, let me text her.”
She pulled her phone out of her purse and began texting. When she was done, she set the phone down and reached across for Angel’s hand again.
“Do you wanna talk about it?” She traced his fingers slowly. “I meant it when I said I’m here for you, Angel. You know that.”
Angel forced a smile and sat back in his chair. “I know you did. But I’d rather not.”
Just then her cell phone beeped. She picked it up and read it. “Alright, she says they were holding hands, embracing and gazing into each other’s eyes. She seemed really happy.”
Angel tried to hide the wave of pain that jolted through him as she read the text. It made sense. Not once since he’d met Sarah had she hidden her affection for Sydney. After Saturday, he didn’t think the pain could get any worse. Why was he doing this to himself? Why’d he come here? He already knew Sarah was in love with Sydney. Then he remembered. He needed confirmation. And now he had it.