CHAPTER 36
Peace of Mind
When I walked through the front door after Mara dropped me off, Axl wasn't the only one waiting for me.
"Do you know what time it is?" my mother asked rhetorically.
"I'm sorry, Mum. I should've called you. I was out with Mara and lost track of time. Please don't be mad. I had a really bad day and I just needed some time away."
"Anything you want to talk about?"
"Not any more. I'm over it. Thanks, though."
"You're welcome, sweetie. Please don't do that to me again. You're usually so responsible; I was nervous. It only takes a second to call."
"You're right, Mum. I'm sorry. It won't happen again. Listen, I'm really tired now so I'm going to go to bed, okay?" I lied in an attempt to extricate myself from the conversation.
"Sure, sweetie. I love you. Sleep well."
I had spent much of the day recalling how nice it was waking up in Ty's arms, wishing we could do that every night. My last memory of the evening was lying next to him, holding hands. I must have turned on my side at some point during the night and he was sweet enough to let me use him as a body pillow. Yet, as great as it was, I hadn't seriously considered his promise to routinely scale the support posts that led to my roof, so I was startled when I opened my bedroom door and found him sitting on my window seat.
"Hey," I said calmly, not letting on.
"Hey, you," he grinned, patting the cushion beside him.
Amenably, I sat down and leaned into him, resting my head on his shoulder.
"Did you have a good time with Mara?"
"I did. Now it looks like I'm going to have a good time with her brother," I teased. "You know, with all the chocolate and coffee that I consumed, I'm not sure I can go to sleep any time soon. Let's go out on the roof again."
The pillows and blanket were where we left them in our haste to get Ty out of the house unnoticed. I was too wired to lie down so I sat on my pillow instead and waited for Ty to situate himself.
I wasn't sure what I wanted to talk about. I was in such a good mood and I didn't want to upset myself by talking about Michael. It's not that I wanted to keep it from Ty, quite the contrary, since I knew how happy my not seeing Michael anymore would make him. But this moment held too much promise to ruin it with a story that could wait or, better yet, be told by Mara.
The night sky was clear and there was no light pollution in the area to mar our view. I looked up. The crescent moon was barely visible but Venus was shining brightly to its left. I fell back on my pillow, my hands clasped behind my head.
"Star gazing?"
"Mmm hmm. I love to imagine the number of possible solar systems in our galaxy and what life might look like on one of the exoplanets."
"Come up with anything interesting?"
"I'm hoping for a planet of unicorns with a rainbow atmosphere."
"I don't think that's asking too much," he chuckled, positioning himself on his side, then leaning over to kiss my cheek.
He lingered there while I continued to stare into space. But when he ran his lips gently over my ear, I let out an involuntary squeak.
"I'm sorry. Am I distracting you? Do you want me to stop?" he murmured softly in my ear.
"You're not distracting me," I lied, suddenly feeling flush.
"Good. Then you just keep on star gazing and I'll keep on not distracting you," he whispered.
"O-kay," I gulped.
His left hand slid across my waist, finding my right hand and clutching it tightly. He was now pressed so snugly against my side that I don't think an ant could have found a space to crawl through. He ran his full lips over my jaw line, stopping at my chin, where he used his perfect teeth to playfully bite me. I went from flushed to full-on flames when his mouth found its way to mine. I was more than ready for his kiss, but it wasn't offered; instead, he opened his eyes, his lips parted, hovering ever so close to mine.
"I love you, Essie Claire," he purred, crumpling next to me, keeping hold of my hand when it was pulled on to my abdomen.
The afternoon's drama with Michael came flooding back into my head as I was reminded how effortlessly those three simple words had fallen out of my mouth; yet, somehow, I was still unable to force them out in response to Ty's declaration.
I tilted my head toward his and squeezed his hand, hoping the gestures would convey my feelings.
True to form, he let it go, and I breathed an internal sigh of relief.
"Is everything okay?" he asked knowingly, despite the fact that he couldn't read my mind.
"How could everything not be okay when I'm with you?" I answered evasively, moving my head to his chest in order to avoid eye contact. "Hey," I added. "Let's set an alarm to wake us up before my mother gets up. How about 5:30?"
With the hand that had been holding mine, he got his phone from his pocket and set the alarm. "All set. Are you ready to fall asleep yet?"
"I think so. Although a serenade might hasten the process."
"A serenade, huh?"
"Mmm hmm."
He began to play with my hair which was draped across his chest.
"Angel eyes
You have angel eyes
And a smile that lights up my life
You're a dream come true
Now I'm holding you
And I'll never, never let you go
I will never let you go
First time I laid my eyes upon you
All my dreams were answered
First time I kissed your tender lips
My love to you I surrendered
I'll never let you go
You're always on my mind
You're the only one for me
You're all I need
And I'll never, never let you go
Angel eyes
My heart relies
On the love you give to me
You never let me down
You're always by my side
And I'll never, never let you go
I will never let you go
When my heart starts to crumble
And the tears start to fall
You hold me close with tender lovin'
And give me strength to carry on
I'll never let you go
You're always on my mind
You're the only one for me
You're all I need
And I'll never, never let you go"
It would have been impossible for me to feel more sedate than I did at that moment. His low, slightly raspy voice was in stark contrast to the original version of that song. But it was amazing. He was amazing. I drifted off as he hummed softly and played with my hair.