*****
Giggle Book One
The Seedless Watermelon
It happened once upon a time when three ants, Gooch, Henry and Junior, were traveling across the country. They were living it up, high on the hog, raiding picnic areas.
“This is the life,” said Gooch, “traveling, seeing the world and eating some of the best foods around.”
“Yeah, Gooch, it sure is,” laughed Henry. “No work, no responsibility, just all fun and play. What a life!”
“Tha…t’s ri…gh…t,” stuttered Junior with a big smile.
However, it came to pass that the picnic areas became few and far apart and the traveling trio began to get awfully hungry.
“We have been walking for miles,” said Henry. “I am starved.”
“If something doesn’t happen soon,” Gooch replied, “I’m not going to make it.”
“Me to…o,” mumbled Junior. “My le…gs are hur…ting and my tumm…y is grow…ling.”
“Hang in there, Junior, we’ll make it some way,” encouraged Gooch.
The day ended and night fell. The threesome sat by the fire roasting crumbs from the last campsite.
“Can you believe it?” cried Gooch. “Those campers were so clean. There were no leftovers, no food droppings and not even a spill.”
“That campsite was clean as a whistle,” stated Henry. “What are we going to do, Gooch?”
Junior’s belly rumbled as he tossed and tumbled in his sleep.
“Poor little fellow,” said Gooch.
Gooch and Henry tried to go to sleep as they lay back by the fire. Their tummies rumbled with small moans and groans. Night soon passed and the fire had slowly flickered out. The rumbling of their tummies were softer now, fewer and further apart. Snoring filled the air as they slept.
The next day the traveling threesome welcomed the early morning sun. It rose and so did they, along with their aching bellies.
“What do you think about it?” asked Henry.
“Well, I don’t know,” replied Gooch. “It’s a new day for sure and we have three crumbs left.”
“Do you think we should eat them now or wait until later?” questioned Henry.
“I don’t know,” replied Gooch. “What do you think, Junior?”
“Oh…oh…oh,” he moaned.
“We better eat them now,” said Henry.
“I believe you’re right,” replied Gooch.
Carefully, the threesome placed a crumb in their mouths. Quickly, they closed their mouths and began to chew.
“Mmm…mmm,” they moaned.
“It’s dry, but good,” said Henry.
“Here, Henry,” suggested Gooch, “drink some of the dew from these leaves; it’ll help wash it down.”
“Ah,” he replied, “that was good.”
“You be…t,” cried Junior as he burped and rubbed his stomach. “Excuse me,” he said.
“Well, guys,” spoke up Gooch as he jumped up and brushed himself off. “It’s time to move on. There’s a great big world out there for us to see.”
As the threesome headed down the road, Gooch started whistling. They hadn’t gone far when they came upon a sign that read, ‘Coon County Line.’ As they walked a little farther, they came upon another sign that read ‘Possum Hollow and Blue Jay Lane Road.’
“How long have we been walking?” Henry asked.
“I don’t know,” replied Gooch. “But, it’s been a while.”
“My stomach is starting to hurt again,” said Henry.
“Mine too,” replied Gooch.
About that time, Junior cried, “Oh…oh, lo…ok over there.”
Gooch and Henry looked up to see what he was talking about.
“Wow!” they screamed.
“Look at that!” shouted Henry.
“Can you believe it,” said Gooch.
They looked across the field, it was a watermelon patch filled with hundreds of melons.
“Our prayers have been answered,” cried Henry.
“I told you tomorrow would be a new day,” replied Gooch.
“Co…me on, let’s ea…t!” screamed Junior.
As their mouths watered, their eyes bulged out past their noses and their little legs trembled. Quickly, they ran for the melon patch.
“Last one there is a rotten egg,” cried Gooch.
“I’m co…ming!” screamed Junior.
The threesome raced to the patch and collapsed at the gate.
“I’m going to eat me a melon, a whole melon by myself,” cried out Gooch who was nearly out of breath and gasping for air.
“I know what you mean,” replied Henry. “I know what you mean.”
Neither of them saw the sign, ‘Kepley’s Farm – Seedless Watermelons.’ The trio was so excited they didn’t take the time to read it. Junior quickly took off his backpack and pitched it up in the air; it hung on a nail sticking out from the sign. It covered up the less in the word seedless.
“Kepley’s Farm – Seed Watermelons,” read Gooch. “Why, thank-you, thank-you, Mr. Kepley; lunch is on you.”
As Henry looked out across the field, his mouth watered. “Look at all those good-looking babies. Wee doggy,” he exclaimed. “I don’t know where to start.”
About that time, Gooch and Junior walked up.
“We need to be thankful to Mr. Kepley,” said Gooch, “and show him some respect. I think the best thing to do is to pick out one melon and eat it. My aunt always told me not to waste food and take only what I need.”
“Say what!” yelled Junior. “There are hundreds of melons here and you mean to tell me we only need to eat one.”
“He didn’t stutter,” replied Henry.
“Hey, dudes, think about what I’m saying. We search the field,” said Gooch, “and find a ripe, sweet melon and then we chow down.”
“But…but,” interrupted Junior. “They’re only melons; they’re not New York prime rib. Besides, he has hundreds.”
“Okay,” replied Gooch, “I didn’t want to have to pull rank on you, dogs, but I’m the oldest, smartest and best looking.”
“Now, wait a minute, Gooch. What does looks have to do with it?” questioned Henry.
“Ye…ah, u…gly,” said Junior.
“Okay, okay, looks has nothing to do with. But, are you guys with me or not?” asked Gooch. “Well, brothers, are you?”
“Okay,” said Henry. “I suppose you’re right.”
“What about it, Junior?” asked Gooch.
“We…ll, I gues…s so,” replied Junior.
“Now that we have that behind us, I think we need to scout the field first,” said Gooch. “Henry, you go that way and I’ll go this way. Junior, you start over yonder.”
Quickly, the threesome split up and started searching.
“Ooh wee, check out the size of this baby,” said Henry.
Across the field, you could hear thumps, sniffs and strange moans as they checked each melon one by one. Hours passed as they searched on.
“Keep looking, keep looking,” Gooch encouraged them. Then all of a sudden, Gooch yelled out, “I found it; it’s here.”
“Where?” yelled Henry.
“Here!” screamed out Gooch.
“Where?” yelled Junior.
“Over here,” said Gooch.
“What’d he say?” asked Henry.
“Ov…er he…re,” replied Junior.
“Hurriedly, Henry and Junior rushed toward the sound of his voice.
“Where?” yelled Henry.
“Over here,” cried Gooch.
About that time, they saw Gooch with the biggest melon they had ever seen.
“Wow!” cried Junior. “I can’t believe it. Look at that baby.”
“He did it again,” said Henry. “He didn’t stutter.”
“This is it,” yelled Gooch. “This is the baby we have been looking for. Smell that sweet juicy aroma. Thump it.”
Thump!
“Music to my ears,” he exclaimed.
“But, Gooch, what if you are wrong? It could be half green and no good. Won’t that be a waste?” questioned Henry.
“Trust me, dog,” said Gooch. “If there is one thing I know, its melons.”
Gooch pulled out his pocketknife and cut a plug out of the melon.
“Here, Junior, you try it first,” suggested Gooch.
Junior reached for the piece of melon, it dripped with sweet red juice. Carefully, he placed it in his mouth. The melon was warm from the sun, sweet, juicy and crisp.
“Ouch!” said Junior. “It’s got seeds, too, but it’s good.”
“Ooh wee, let’s eat!” shouted Henry.
Quickly, Gooch slashed the melon with his knife and popped the melon open. Hurriedly, the three rushed up on top of it and sat on the edge of the rind with their legs dangling off the side.
“What did I tell you?” said Gooch. “What did I say, brother? Just look at that baby.”
As they dug in, they quickly plowed the heart out of the melon. They slung juice and spit seeds everywhere.
“This is it,” cried Henry. “This has to be the best melon I have ever eaten, except for the seeds.”
“What did I tell you!” replied Gooch. “I know my melons.”
“Mmm good,” said Junior.
“Don’t try to talk with your mouth full,” said Henry.
Yep, those boys had found their meal ticket. As the hot summer sun shone down that day on the patch, they had juice all over their faces and hands. It ran down their arms and dripped off their elbows. They were in paradise.
“You know,” said Gooch, “there’s something I can’t figure out. Why can’t they grow a watermelon with no seeds, they do everything else? A seedless watermelon, wouldn’t that be a dream come true. Just look at all those seeds. Can you imagine a hot, juicy red watermelon with no seeds? It would be Heaven on earth.”
“I wish this one was seedless,” said Henry. “My pucker is about worn out from spitting seeds.”
“Yeah, I don’t kno…w how many I…,” replied Junior.
About that time Gooch screamed out, “Ouch!”
“Another seed?” asked Henry.
“Yeah,” mumbled Gooch.
It wasn’t long until their little bellies began to poke out. They became tired and sleepy so they lay back on the melon and took a nap. Soon, the day passed and the sun had dried the juice on their hands and arms. Suddenly, Gooch awoke.
“Yuck!” he said.
Slowly, he rose up. He had gooey, nasty and sticky watermelon juice all over him.
“Wake up, guys,” he cried. “It’s time to move on.”
“Oh, me,” Henry and Junior moaned.
“So soon?” asked Henry. “But, what about all this sticky stuff we have on us?”
“I saw a creek across the road,” replied Gooch. “We’ll go over there and wash off.”
“I’m still full,” moaned Junior.
Slowly, the three climbed down out of the empty watermelon shell and headed for the gate.
“I can’t wait to get to the creek,” said Gooch, “and get this mess off me. That’s the worst thing about watermelons, next to the seeds.”
As the three passed through the gate, Junior snatched his backpack down from the sign and kept on going. They were all so wrapped up in how good and sweet the melon was, they never looked at the sign. Hurriedly, they disappeared across the road to the creek; little did they know that the field was full of seedless melons. The one they picked out of the field was the only one that had seeds! Evidently, when Mr. Kepley planted the melons, a regular watermelon seed must have been mixed in with the others.
Across the road in the creek, you could hear the three worldly travelers splashing and laughing.