CHAPTER 36
MCGREGOR AND FRIENDS
A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him I may think aloud.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Narbo, lad!”
Narbo? Bates thought that he recognized that voice! Someone used to call him that, in years past. He started to open his eyes. It wasn't easy; he was having a comfortable sleep that he was reluctant to leave. Besides, the light was too bright. It would be much easier just to go back to sleep for just a while longer. But his eyes focused on something close by that kept him from doing that.
It was Janet, his Janet, lying next to him in sleep. Several alternative fantasy lifetimes involving himself and Janet flashed through his mind for a few moments until reality all came crashing in on him, a reality far more bizarre and demanding than anything he could have even imagined just a week earlier.
For as he now recalled this was Monday morning, exactly one week after this business all started, and less than four days until the destruction of Earth, a cataclysmic disaster which he was responsible to stop though he still had absolutely no idea how to do so. Further he was in some sort of magical land, lying on a straw mat in a sort of hut to which a unicorn had led them all the night before. No wonder he felt momentarily disoriented!
"You lazy Government free-loader! And this, a work day you’d be sleeping through at that! As an ex-tax payer, I object.”
Now Bates definitely recognized the voice, and he looked up to see that a blurred image stood in the doorway. "Gus? Gus McGregor? Is it really you?” Bates sat up, put on his glasses, and saw a thin, gray-haired, spry little old man standing in the doorway. It certainly looked like Gus! After a week of this business he didn't think that anything could surprise him, but this certainly did!
"Well sure and it's me, Bucko; you're sleeping on me floor, so who'd yea expect to see?” The little man entered the hut taking quick, sure steps that suggested energy and an impatience to get on with life. His head was a mass of twisted gray hair with small openings for sharp, clear dancing brown eyes, round little red nose, and grinning mouth with thin lips and flashing white teeth, perched on a short thin body clothed in kilt, hiking boots, and worn brown work-shirt. His hairy, spindly legs didn’t look as though they could support even such a small man, much less propel him with such energy. Gus hadn’t changed a bit!
"What? You mean that this is your home, Gus? You actually live here?” Bates was astonished. He hadn't seen Augustus McGregor since the man retired from Government service maybe eight years ago and moved to Florida. Finding him here seemed as unlikely as traveling to the Moon and happening upon a brother-in-law or a long-lost cousin.
"These past four years it’s me home Narbo, me lad! But living is too mild a term to use for life in this place. Isn't it grand? But wait, you haven't seen it yet in the light of day, have you?"
In three nimble steps Gus was reaching down to give Bates a surprisingly strong hand up and towards the door. Bates only had time for a quick look around the single room cabin. He was reassured to note that the rest of the Team was still there in the cabin, in various attitudes of repose, on floor, bed, and chairs, somehow still sound asleep despite the ruckus he and Gus were making. Krog and Wink were lying in a corner apart from the others, as motionless as ever. On the plus side, at least the comatose, hardly breathing aliens didn't snore like many of the others.
Unnoticed in the darkness of the night before, cabin walls were lined with shelves cluttered under dried leaves, flowers, and mushrooms, odd colored rocks, animal bones, old wasps-nests, feathers, notebooks, and other naturalist paraphernalia. Gus lived here all right!
"Come on Narbo lad, we'll let your friends sleep just a wee bit yet, while you and me get reacquainted.” With that Gus pulled Bates outside.
Bates started to follow Gus along a stone path that led into nearby woods, but got no further than the first couple of steps. Then he could only stand gaping, overwhelmed! What had been in large measure hidden by darkness and weariness the night before was now exposed in the brilliant splendor of day. He tried to take it all in: sight and sound, smell and touch. "Holy cannoli!" he exclaimed. The world outside was impossibly bright, green, and alive!
A few steps from the path on which he stood, a small brook of clear cool looking water bubbled by. As Bates watched, some sort of large fish leapt out of the water. While trying to see it better, Bates noted a beaver swimming down the brook, and a raccoon with its babies along the stony shore.
Around the path and across the brook spread fresh, green, grassy meadowland, decorated in blue, orange, red, and gold by rampant patches of wild flowers. Deer and elk grazed the meadows, and calling birds flew here and there in great profusion. To either side, forests of enormous trees towered, some of a size that would dwarf even the largest redwoods and sequoia trees in the outside world.
A gentle breeze caressed his cheeks and hands and tugged gently at the clothes that only seemed to distance him from these wild and vital surroundings, and brought a million odors of forest life and death to him: sweet and pungent, musty and musky. The cool morning air also carried a chorus of life sounds to his ears; chirping, croaking, chattering, grunts, coos, whistles, and other such songs as old as time and as fresh as life.
Then there was the light. Like the dim lighting of the previous night, the light of day, if that's what it was, was also diffuse; it seemed to come from the entire, light blue sky, rather than from a single point, for the Sun itself was nowhere to be seen. How could it be so bright, with a cloudless sky but no Sun? It was as if the light of the sun was being scattered as it passed through a translucent covering of some sort; a notion that he dismissed at once, when he realized the engineering demands of such a huge structure. This Land appeared to be at least several miles across, and yet there was no sign of any supporting structure for so gigantic a 'roof'.
Logical speculations about the sky however, were overwhelmed by the emotional effects of the panorama now spread before him on the ground. Bates wasn't an outdoorsy sort of guy, but he was a sucker for the splendor of nature, as long as it wasn't biting, freezing, or frying his ass.
As he looked closer, he realized that this was nature as he had never before seen it. Everything seemed to be spectacular in terms of size and profusion, but even more amazing, it seemed to also be entirely perfect. Every nearby blade of grass was green and whole and perfect, every flower was without wilt or fade, every tree leaf was without chewed edges, and without dead or broken branches.
The stone path he stood on was not encroached upon by any growth trying to reclaim it. It was as if everything in the Land had its established properties that were understood and respected by itself and every other thing. A sort of Plato's garden turned on it's head, if he correctly recalled his study of philosophy, as here perfect instances of everything actually existed.
"A bit overwhelming lad, is it not?" asked McGregor, who had been standing quietly studying Bates, as Bates studied his surroundings.
"It's perfect!” answered Bates.
"Aye, that it is. But you seem troubled by something Narbo. Come sit and tell me.” Bates followed Gus perhaps fifty meters from the house, to the edge of the great forest. There the little old man sat down on a root of a gigantic tree that stretched up too high to see, and he motioned Bates to sit on a similar one.
"Well," explained Bates, "it's just a bit too perfect. It's unnatural.”
"Not so, Narbo. You have a sharp eye lad, but you are a bit free and loose with interpretation. But we can talk about that later. I talked to Pru. They'll be coming for you soon to take the lot of you before the High Council. Now I'm still considered to be a newcomer here, Narbo, but my voice does carry some weight. If you'll tell me what this is really about, old friend, maybe I can help you.”
"Thanks Gus, we can use all the help we can get, but who is Pru?”
"You need my help indeed, if you don't even know that Pru is the name of the unicorn that brought you here. But then she's a
bit stingy with her name, especially with strangers."
Gus reached out and gave Bates a friendly pat on the shoulder. "Well then Narbo, what is it then that you're really after? Gold? Diamonds? Fame? All are here, me-Lad."
"What on Earth are you talking about Gus? Didn’t Pru explain anything to you?"
"Not about what you really came for, lad. She told me some nonsense about saving the Earth, that's all. We aren't the first or the last humans to come here, you know. It won't be easy, but I can help you, Narbo, and help myself in the bargain. I've been planning this for years, but I needed help to pull it off. Imagine diamonds bigger than your fist, lad! And knowledge! Stuff that will turn the scientific community on its ear! We'll be more famous than Einstein! And we'll live like kings, all of us!”
Bates was shocked. "Gus! Are you crazy? None of that matters at all! Surely, living here in this wonderful place must have shown you that! We don't care about diamonds or gold or money or anything like that. We need to revive the aliens and try to find the Traveler in the Black Pit! And then after that we have to find the Sleeping Great One. It's our only hope to save the Earth from the asteroid and the Ra!”
"Oh yes, the asteroid. Pru told me about it. Quite a wild story, that. A little extreme Narbo lad, though it may distract the Council well enough. But you can be straight with me my old friend. Where did you get the strange material for your Bus though? Is that why you enlisted the Ra to help you?"
"What? Help us? Gus, the Ra have been trying to kill us! The Bus material is something that Jigs came up with, and that's about all we know about it. Jigs said to keep the Ra away from the stuff, but I don't think they have anything to do with it."
"Narbo lad, aren't the Ra the ones that made you DOD Head? Come clean! We'll need the Ra to fly us and our goodies out of these God forsaken mountains!”
Bates had about enough. "Gus, you're welcome to leave here with us in our Bus, if you want, but not with any stolen goods. Maybe we can drop you off in Salt Lake City, if that would make you happy. I'll lend you some money, if you need some. But the Ra are still trying to hunt us down, and we might not make it. Last night they nearly killed us again! I don't know how long our luck will hold!”
"Narbo me friend, you know you can trust me! Tell me the truth lad, and I'll help you convince the Council that this crazy story of yours is true. I still want you to help me get some stuff out of here, just a few diamonds for us. They have tons of them, they'll never miss a few handfuls. Here, take some!” Gus pulled a handful of glittering diamonds out of a kilt pocket and held them out to Bates. Some were as big as golf balls!
Bates shoved them away. "The truth is Gus, we just don't have time for this nonsense. That asteroid will be here in less than four days, and we still haven't the slightest idea how to stop it! And here you are, talking about stealing diamonds! What's happened to you Gus?”
"Come on, how about just a few diamonds Narbo? You’ll be rich! With these and the knowledge of this place, we'll have it made!”
Bates shook his head resolutely. "No Gus. And I take back my invitation to you to travel out with us. I haven't seen much of this place yet, Gus, but what I've seen so far looks far more remarkable and valuable than a mountain of diamonds. And to keep it that way, it has to stay a total secret. If you don't feel that way, I think you better stay here. I'm sorry Gus."
Bates reached out to pat his friend’s shoulder, but Gus moved away. "If you don't help me lad, I'll see that you stay here forever. You and your Janet and your twins, trapped here forever!”
"Wait just a minute!” exclaimed Bates. "I never told our unicorn friend anything about Janet and the kids having anything to do with me! And furthermore, the Gus McGregor I knew for several years would never leave a wondrous place like this for diamonds or fame, or betray his friends or the world! You look and sound like McGregor all right, but you just don't think like McGregor! Who are you, and what the deuce is going on here?"
"He's invalidated the trial!” claimed a voice.
"Nonsense, it was over with anyway. Fen just doesn't know when to quit," said another voice.
"Or when to keep his mouth shut!” exclaimed yet another, followed by the laughter of several voices. Bates twisted this way and that, trying to discover the sources of the mysterious voices. They seemed to be coming from all around him, and only a few feet away, yet there was no visible sign of anyone other than himself and Gus.
"Who's Fen?" he asked, in the direction of the voice that had said the name.
"I'm afraid I'm Fen," said Gus. But it wasn't Gus. Suddenly the form of Gus was indistinct and wavering, like a reflection on a rippling pond, and then it re-solidified into a pointy eared, hairy little man with little goat horns on his forehead and shaggy goat legs and backside, as well as hooves instead of feet.
Bates jumped back about three meters, rather athletically for a pudgy man of 43.
"Sorry for the deception, Doctor Bates, continued Fen, but we had to be absolutely sure. Pru is an excellent judge of character, but this is a rather unprecedented situation. We have direct dealings with several humans but trust was established with most of them over many years, not overnight."
"Is this more unicorn magic?" asked Bates. "Is Pru in on this?" Instantly a tree stump a few feet away shimmered into the reclined form of the unicorn, which rose and pranced over to Bates. "I am," she said.
"I am her mate, Baldor," said a deeper voice. A great tree root transformed abruptly into a magnificent unicorn, taller and of heavier build than Pru.
I am Malgandro," said a very deep voice indeed. To Bates' astonishment, the root on which he had been sitting transformed into the form of a griffin, with massive lion body and huge eagle wings and beaked head.
"I am Thela, human," said a soft, sexy female voice, as another form seemed to step out of the trunk of a massive tree. This one appeared to be very human, and so startling in her nude beauty that Bates could do nothing but rudely stare. She stepped away from the tree, and the two huge white wings attached to her back became visible. As startling as that was, the human beauty of her naked form still monopolized his attention.
"I am Sheara," said another female voice. Bates turned and found that his eyes were navel level to another nude female form, this one definitely and captivatingly human from the navel up, and horse for the rest of her body. Both parts sported striking reddish hair.
"AND I AM GOR" said a voice so deep and loud that the Earth seemed to tremble. Bates watched for a moment in amazement as a giant at least ten meters tall stepped from the trunk of the huge tree. That naked Gor was male was quite obvious, despite a profusion of body hair.
Unfortunately, it was all too much for Bates, who fainted and fell to the ground like a rag doll.
"So that's the hero that wants to save Earth?" said Malgandro sarcastically, flapping his wings lightly in disgust.
"I think he's cute for a mortal," said Thela. "Or at least he would be without all those rags he wears. They're probably suffocating him. Why don't I take them off the poor creature and try to wake him? I can think of ways to wake him that he'd surely enjoy.”
"Forget it Thela; we will put him back in the hut and question more of the others," said Pru.
"What about our human friends on Goth Mountain?" asked Fen. "Should we contact them? As humans they probably have special insight into these strangers and their story."
"Not quite yet," answered Pru. "We'll interrogate all the strangers ourselves first."
"AS YOU WISH, WISE PRU," said Gor, and the giant lifted Bates and gently placed his sleeping body inside the hut. "WHO NEXT?" he asked.
"How about that good looking Indian?" said Thela. Gor reached through the hut doorway and pulled out another sleeping Team member. It was Winnebago. "That's him!” said Thela, smiling. "The cute one!”
Pru softly whinnied. It was going to be a very long morning. She concentrated on the human's image, and then used it as part of an inquiry that she sent into the spirit dimension. The
response was almost immediate this time, and came from just outside the Land! In a short time she learned why the spirit of Goyahkla sought entrance to the Land. It was useful information, but Goyahkla was not the right spirit for Winnebago to confide his secrets to. No matter, there would be someone else from the spirit world that Winnebago would talk to openly. With humans, there always was.
****