Dashelle patted Court’s arm. “I’ll do what I can.”
***
The girls went into Ashleigh’s makeshift bedroom and cleared a spot off the bed.
“Court’s worried about you,” Dashelle said.
Ashleigh sat on the bed and gave a half smile. “He’s always looking out for me, huh? My adopted big brother.”
“This was his idea to get us to come over here and get you out of this apartment,” Freedom said.
“Girls, this is really sweet of you, but I can’t go tonight. I mean this was supposed to be Kelso’s night to shine. And, well, you know how the story ends.”
“The story isn’t ending, it’s just beginning. And if you can’t go for Kelso, go for J.T. and Court. They are having a hard time dealing with losing a friend, too and they need all the support they can get right now,” Heidi remarked. She went over to the closet and pulled out a purple sundress with giant Hawaiian flowers all over it. “Seriously? You own this?”
“Girl, we need to go shopping!” Dashelle said. “We have two hours to find the Ashleigh that everyone knows and loves.” She threw Ashleigh a pair of skinny jeans and the bright red shirt she had worn on her first date with Kelso. “Get dressed. We’re going out.”
The girls ran from boutique to boutique. Ashleigh fought them every step of the way. She did not want to go to the show. She knew that when she walked into the theater, her thoughts and her memories of Kelso would overtake her. She would see him on the stage rehearsing lines with Mimi. If she went backstage, she would see him sitting on that stool watching her dance. And most of all, she would see the ocean scene where they said their vows. The girls didn’t understand how she felt. They just wanted her to go along with them like she always did. Hadn’t Dashelle said something about making her own decisions? Well, she had decided she wasn’t going and Dashelle and the rest of her friends were making other plans.
“I don’t want to do this!” Ashleigh pleaded. “I just want to curl up in the apartment and be alone.”
“No, not an option,” Heidi said. “It’s been a week, Ash. You need to get out and be with people. Things are not going to get better if you just sit in the past. Kelso would want you to be there.”
“Why is this so important to all of you?” Ashleigh begged.
“Because, Ashleigh, we are concerned about you. We are here for you and we need you to come back to the world with us. You need to show everyone that you can cope with whatever comes your way,” Dashelle said. She was searching through a rack of dresses. “Aha, I found it. Go try this on.” Dashelle shoved a red skirt that had a halter top at her best friend.
Ashleigh grabbed the dress from Dashelle and stomped to the fitting rooms. “Fine, but I do recall someone telling me it was time to make my own decisions!” she yelled while opening a dressing room door.
Chapter 30
J.T. and Court were standing backstage. Well, J.T. was standing—Court was pacing.
“Relax, man. You’ll do fine,” J.T. assured his best friend.
“Oh, easy for you to say. You’ve had a few weeks to rehearse. I’m pretty much going cold turkey here,” Court snapped.
“Are you forgetting you pretty much know this play by heart anyway?” J.T. asked.
“Not the same, man. I’m freaking out!”
“Just an audience. You’ve had an audience before. Pretty sure you have even had a camera shoved in front of your face,” J.T. reassured him.
“I know, I know. I just haven’t been in front of a live audience in awhile.” He stopped pacing and pulled back the curtain. “I wonder if they got Ashleigh here.” Court looked around didn’t see the girls, yet.
“Oh my gosh.” He paused between each word. “J.T., my parents are here.”
“What?” J.T. was as shocked as Court was.
“I’d prefer not to repeat that phrase,” Court mumbled.
“How? Why?”
“I have no idea. I mean I sent them tickets, but I didn’t expect them to actually show up.” Court covered his mouth and swallowed. “I think I . . .um . . .” He nonchalantly backed up and headed to the nearest bathroom. Apparently, his nerves had got the best of him and were about to spew forth.
“Hi, Jayson.”
J.T. looked up. He saw Heidi wearing a black dress with a bandeau top. She had straightened out her usual curls for the occasion. He smiled. “Hey, beautiful. How’d you sneak back here?”
“I have my connections.” She grinned. “Just came back to wish you good luck.” She walked over to him and kissed him on the mouth. J.T. put his fingertips against her sides and slowly ran them down. Heidi pressed up against him, but J.T. pulled himself away. He did not want to have anything hinder his focus on the job he was about to do. Heidi stopped as Court rounded the corner.
“We’ll finish what we started after the show,” Heidi whispered in J.T.’s ear. She turned to Court. “Knock ‘em dead.”
“We all ready did,” Court said under his breath.
Heidi covered her mouth and blushed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it that way.”
“I know,” Court said. He put his arm around her shoulder and hugged her. “Thanks for the good luck. Did Ashleigh make it?”
“I think the rest of the crew is trying to cajole her inside the theater. She won’t set foot inside. At least we got her in the cab, though. We even got her to get out of that awful outfit she had on earlier. She’s fighting every step of the way. Brady and Sam almost had to carry her to get her to leave the apartment.”
“She needs to be out of that apartment,” J.T. said. “It’s not going to help her to stay there.”
“She needs to be here. She’s never acted this way, before. . and I’ve seen her through a lot of deaths in her family.”
“We’ll get her here, Court. You just think about what you are here to do tonight.”
“That’s the problem, Heidi. I can’t. My wonderful family has decided to grace me with their presence on opening night without any warning and I’ve been hurling in the bathroom for the past five minutes.”
“Too much information. On that note, I’ll let you two prepare.” Heidi walked back into the theater to see if the rest of the gang had made it into the theater.
“J.T, are you seriously not even a bit nervous about what you are about to do tonight?” Court asked.
“Not, yet. Wait until intermission. I will be a whole different person. Believe me,” J.T. said.
“How long do you think you can keep her waiting? She’s not a very patient person, you know,” Court said.
“I’m not either. This just seems like the right thing to do. Okay? I want to make her happy.”
Ashleigh turned the corner inside the theater and stopped. Her path was blocked by Kelso’s headshot with an “In loving memory” banner draped around it. Dashelle saw the wells of tears starting to form in Ashleigh’s eyes and grabbed her hand.
“It’s okay,” Dashelle whispered.
“I can’t do this, ladies,” Ashleigh protested. “If I can’t even make it into the door without tearing up, how am I supposed to get through a performance that was meant to be his and will blatantly not be when Court does it.”
“Because we are all here to support you. We will not let you do this alone,” Dashelle encouraged.
“C’mon, Ash,” Freedom said. “The show is about to start.” Freedom grabbed Ashleigh’s other hand and the two girls guided her into the theater. They found the front row seats where Heidi was waiting and sat down.
***
“Man, look at you. You’re not even breaking a sweat. How are you not nervous about this?” Court asked J.T.
“I dunno. I’m not so nervous about the show, but more about the grand finale,” J.T. answered
“Oh, yeah, that. Good luck.”
“Two minutes, boys and girls. Two minutes!” the producer announced. “Please take your marks.”
“All
right, Court. This is it.” J.T. said. He made sure he had his mic on and walked out onto the stage. He looked at the audience that was almost standing room only. He forgot how popular RENT was until he saw everyone staring at him. “Good evening, everyone. Each night we dedicate this performance to the man who created it, Jonathan Larson, but tonight we also have someone else who deserves a dedication. If any of you came through the grand entrance, you noticed a headshot of Kelso Stark. He was our self proclaimed real life Roger. Unfortunately, he lost his battle with HIV last week and will not be performing tonight. In his place, will be Court Parker. So, tonight we dedicate this performance to Jonathan Larson, our great friend, Kelso Stark, and his widow, Ashley Stark.” J.T. paused and walked off the stage. “And now, on with the show.”
Heidi looked over at Ashleigh whose face was very pale. “You ok?”
“I never got to use that name. I’m not sure if I’m comfortable with that name,” Ashleigh remarked.
“You don’t have to keep it,” Heidi said. “But, I would. It’s a nice memory.”
“Yeah,” Ashleigh whispered. “Just a memory.”
The lights went down and the opening act began. Court and J.T. sang the first song. At one point when Court did not have to sing and he thought no one was paying attention he mouthed “thank you” to Ashleigh. She sheepishly smiled and fumbled with the hem of her skirt. As the story went on, she began to enjoy it more and more. She didn’t forget about Kelso, but she put her fear and depression in the back of her mind so she could take in the performances of her two best guy friends. They were having a blast. The second act began, J.T. hopped off the stage and drug Ashleigh onto the stage. She sang without a mic during “Seasons of Love.” Fortunately, Greg, the director, was encouraging this sort of behavior tonight. He liked doing things differently every once in awhile. He thought it might spice up the review.
When Court starting singing “Your Eyes” he looked up at Ashleigh and almost through the person who was playing Mimi. He thought he could hear a voice saying, “Look at her. Look how beautiful she is. Why are you holding yourself back?” It was either his conscious or Kelso speaking to him from beyond. “Take care of her,” he heard. “Don’t ever lose her.”
When Court stopped thinking about the voice, he heard that he was singing a duet.
“I thought this was a solo,” Heidi said aloud.
“Not anymore,” Freedom said. She pointed to where she heard the other voice.
J.T. was walking towards Heidi singing. He helped her up out of her seat for a moment and then he knelt down. The music faded. “Heidi Ann Weir, would you make my boyhood dream come true tonight. We have known each other for a long time and loved each other even more as the days have gone on.” He opened up a ring box with a solitaire diamond in it. “Will you marry me?”
Heidi covered her mouth to muffle the squeal that was forming. She could not find any words to answer, so she nodded her head.
“Yes?” J.T. asked.
Heidi nodded.
Yes!” J.T. answered. He slid the ring onto her finger and gave her a peck on the cheek. “Sorry to propose and run, but I’ve got a show to finish.” He ran back onto the stage and the music started up again.
At the end of the show the montage played of the cast. Instead of seein Angel as the last image of the show, Ashleigh looked up and saw a picture from her wedding. Kelso was all smiles as he watched Ashleigh walking down the aisle to marry him. Ashleigh turned her head away like she had been slapped in the face. Her tears stung as she tried to convince herself not to cry.
“Ash, let it go,” Dashelle said. “It’s okay.”
“I have got to stop this,” Ashleigh said. “These tears won’t bring him back. He’d want me to be happy, right?”
Dashelle nodded. “So, get out one last good cry and then let’s go to the cast party.”
“We’ve got VIP passes,” Heidi said.
“You’re still around?” I figure you would have bolted at the last note of the last song,” Ashleigh said.
“I’m trying to restrain myself and if I have to wait any longer, I’m going to explode. C’mon, let’s go!” Heidi grabbed Ashleigh’s hand and practically ran backstage. She didn’t let go of Ashleigh until she saw Court in front of her. Then, she ran to J.T. and practically barreled him over.
“Why did you make me wait? You know I don’t like to wait!” Heidi screamed.
“Because, you are worth the wait,” J.T. answered. He kissed her gently on the lips.
Heidi stepped back and looked at J.T. Her blue eyes were dancing with excitement. “So, does this mean . . .?”
J.T. rubbed his forehead. “Heidi, we have plenty of time for that.”
“But, why not now? You’re the one that I want to be with, so there isn’t really a reason to wait anymore.”
J.T. sat Heidi down on the step beside the stage. He made sure that they could have a private moment before he started to talk. “Yes, there is a reason to wait. I don’t want you to have any scars. I want to touch every part of your body.” He moved her hair away from her ear and whispered. “Even the parts that are hidden from me. I want to kiss every inch of you.”
Heidi’s stomach flipped. If J.T.’s words could do that to her, what exactly was going to happen when he touched her?
“I won’t have scars, J.T. I’m ready.”
“Heidi, I’m ready, too, but I have morals and values and I don’t want to screw this up. I’ve hurt you once all ready and I don’t want to do it again. So, please, can you wait? Because, when I wake up in the morning, I want you to still be right next to me and not leaving to go to your place. I want you climbing the walls for me.”
“What makes you think I’m not all ready?” Heidi mumbled.
J.T. smiled. “Trust me, you won’t want to leave the house when I’m done with you.” He paused. “I won’t want you to, either.”
Heidi looked at J.T. with glistening blue eyes. “How can you be so patient with me? I keep wanting more and you keep telling me to wait.” Her lip quivered. “I’m sorry.”
J.T. pulled Heidi close to him, so she could rest her head on his shoulder. He ran his fingers through her silky blond hair. “Oh, sweetie, there’s no reason to be sorry. You should be patient with me. I have prayed every night for God to make me strong enough to stop myself from throwing myself at you. In fact, even before we were ever a couple, I said that prayer. I’m only asking you to wait because that’s how I’m coping with this. If I have to wait, you have to wait.”
“Who says we have to wait?” Heidi rose her head from J.T.’s shoulders.
J.T. raised his eyebrows. “You know who.”
“Seriously, Jayson. You and I are almost 22 years old and we haven’t. . .I think there is probably a loophole in the teachings once you get our age.”
“No, Heidi, there isn’t. Please, just wait a little longer. I’ll make it worth the wait, I promise.”
“Why don’t we just go to Reno and get the ceremony over with,” Heidi suggested.
“No, Heidi. You wouldn’t want to do that. Your family wants to be there. I know you’ve waited for this moment all your life. It’s what little girls dream about, right? So, get the plans made and I will show up in my tux and rented shoes. Okay?” He took her hand and kissed it. Heidi’s body tingled at his touch.
“Mr. Sumtrane, I hope I’m not interrupting anything,” Dean Harlow interrupted.
“No, nothing at all. Apparently, I can’t have too much of a quiet moment with my fiancé,” J.T. snapped.
“I just wanted to congratulate you on a job well done. You did a fantastic job and I loved the artistic license you took tonight. This was by far the best version of Rent I have seen so far.”
“This wasn’t your first time?” Heidi asked.
“Oh, no, dear. This is probably my tenth or eleventh time. This is one of my favorite Broadway shows.”
“Wow, the dean is a
Rent head.”
“Yes, but I’m still the dean and I still expect to see you in class bright and early tomorrow morning. Don’t party too hard.”
J.T. saluted. “Yes, ma’am.”
Dean Harlow rolled her eyes. “There is no need for that, Mr. Sumtrane.” She turned to Heidi. “Congratulations, Ms. Wier.” She turned and walked off.
“Hey, let’s go find the rest of the crew.”
“I’m sure they’re all hoarded around a bunch of free food and drinks next door.”
“As long as they save some for me, that’s fine.”
Chapter 31
“Court, can I talk to you?” Ashleigh asked. Court was sitting on the bar at Mac’s. Mac was gracious enough to close the doors and have the cast party right next door to the theater.
“I don’t know what is stopping you. Go ahead.” He took a sip from his bottle of Bud.
“This is important, Court. I need your full attention,” Ashleigh begged.
Court put his bottle on the bar. “Okay, Ash, let’s go outside.” He opened the door for her and followed after her.
“I’m sorry about the way I acted earlier today. I don’t know why I did it,” Ashleigh blurted out.
“It was just a moment of passion, I understand,” Court joked. “The ladies can’t get enough of me.”
“Are you all ready drunk tonight? It hasn’t even been ten minutes since the show let out.”
“No, no, I’m not.” Court shook his head and laughed. “Okay, maybe a little.”
“Court, I really need to talk to you. Sober up,” Ashleigh pleaded.
“I’m just joking. I want to see you laugh again.” He brushed his hand against her arm. “I haven’t seen you laugh in awhile.”
“Court, I’m so embarrassed. I didn’t mean to throw myself at you like that earlier. I mean, we are just friends, and you were right. We tried to be more than friends once a long time ago and it didn’t work. So, why should it work now? I am just so frustrated right now. I don’t know what I want. Wait, yes, I do. I want Kelso back. I want him standing right here and I want to kiss him and tell him what a great job he did playing Roger.”