My mother was sitting in her chair in the living room watching soap operas; she was the biggest cliché of all mothers, I swear. She didn’t say anything to me, just pulled her brows together, questioningly.
Her caretaker, Vicky, walked out of the kitchen holding a cup of coffee, sipping at it. “Hello, sweetie. How was your day?” She wore a tight, white blouse that was cut so low that her chest looked about ready to burst out. Her “skirt” barely covered her ass. She had my mother’s diamond necklace around her neck with way too much make-up and way too high heels on for just being a caretaker.
What the hell?
I looked to my mother, who was squeezing her eyes shut tight, then back at Vicky.
“Did you just call me ‘sweetie’?” I snapped.
“Yes, sorry. I guess you’re too old for that, huh?” She waved her hands in the air at me and giggled. “So, Jase…Your dad will be home soon. Will you be joining us for dinner?”
I’m in the freaking Twilight Zone.
I looked back at my mother again. “Is everybody in this house crazy? Is she actually wearing your necklace and dressed like a prostitute for a reason?”
Vicky started to interrupt me, but I cut her off. “I want to speak to my mother alone, now.”
She cleared her throat and placed her coffee cup down on one of the tables next to the couch. The rim was stained with deep red lip prints. “Fine. I’ll just be in the kitchen preparing dinner for your dad. If your mother needs me, you know where to find me.”
I watched her walk out of the room and my head snapped back to my mother’s embarrassed face. “Are you going to talk to me today? You wanna tell me what’s going on?”
She blinked her eyes slowly and bowed her head, making a few strands of her hair fall in front of her eyes. Knowing she could barely use the muscles in her arms to lift her hands and sweep her hair from her face, I did it for her. She was so helpless that my heart ached. I hated my father for what he'd done to her.
“One of your father’s many replacements for me, Jase. You know how he is,” she whispered with a quivering lip.
“Don’t put up with his shit. I’ll get you out of here,” I said.
“No.”
“What? You like being the victim?”
“Jase, you will never understand. Not until you love someone more than you love yourself,” she whispered.
“That’s sick. You’re sick. He’s sick. And that nut in the kitchen is sick.”
The front door slammed closed and my father’s voice was a deep, low threat that slid over my skin. “Get away from your mother, and don’t ever talk to her like that again.”
Oh look, the jerk who thinks he’s God is home.
“What? It’s okay for you to disrespect her with your words, your cheating, and your fists, but I can’t try to help her?”
He swallowed the distance between us in two huge steps, and I stilled myself to stand up to him and lifted my eyes to meet his ice-cold stare. His eyes were the same messed up whitish-blue as mine, and I hated that I looked anything like him. I hated anything that had to do with him. I knew what kind of evil he had inside him; that asshole is the reason my mother was in her wheel chair.
He swung hard and fast, knocking the air right out of my lungs with one quick punch to my chest. As soon as he pulled back for another swing, I blocked his hand and clocked him in the jaw. He tumbled backward with wide disbelieving eyes; I had never hit him back, ever.
Lunging at me, he struck me hard again—landing two jabs at my eye. My vision blurred instantly, and I quickly used my arm to wipe the warm drops of blood that fell down the side of my face. He took that reprieve to jab another two lightning fast punches, to my mouth this time, splitting it open. The taste of my own blood made me furious. He came at me one more time, but I blocked the advance and foot-swept him, making him crash hard to the floor.
I stepped over him, grabbed my helmet, and ran out the back door, slamming it hard behind me. I ran into the garage, gripped my dirt bike by the handlebars, and pushed it through the double doors. My father stood at the back door of the house, leaning against the doorframe, smiling. He was smiling at me.
“It’s about time you learned to be a man,” he mumbled.
“You are one sick son of a bitch,” I said back, making my way out into the street with my bike. With my right foot, I jumped on the kick-start, bringing the engine to life, and without letting it warm up, sped away. I didn’t even put the helmet on until I reached the corner of my street, and then slammed my visor down.
I rode like a demon through the streets to the end of the neighborhood where the weeds were. I didn’t even stop for stop signs. I was too angry, and I was too reckless—that’s how I always was. I never thought about the consequences for anything. And yeah, I thought about riding fast, head first into a brick building or off the Cross-Bay Bridge, flipping over my handlebars and dying some crazy-ass death. That’s how pissed off I was. Don’t you dare tell me that you’ve never thought crap like that, either! It’s a human reaction, and we’re not freaking robots. Although I wished like Hell I was one, because then my heart wouldn’t be aching so much. I could just shut myself off. Unplug myself so I could feel nothing.
I rode my way down through the high weeds, along the dirt trail we all raced through, and over the sand to the beach. My red and black Baja Dirt Runner 125-motocross bike was the latest gift from Dear Old Dad after I walked in on him busting his nuts in the first woman he hired to take of my mother. I guess that was his way of bribing me to keep my mouth shut. I took the bike, but I didn’t keep his secrets. I anonymously called the nursing service she worked for and got her fired, then told my mother. But again, my mother didn’t mind, she already knew. Some people like living in Woe-Is-Me-Land, gives them a sense of worth—being other people’s doormats.
Making my way over the rocky terrain, I searched for friendly faces. There were four other guys on bikes, revving their engines, just waiting for me to join them.
When I saw Charlie and Mason standing next to each other, I almost lost it. With everything that had just gone down, I’d forgotten what I was originally pissed off about. Staring at her, I realized I was spiraling into crazed territory. Charlie had on a pair of low-rise jeans with torn knees and a tight white Avenged Sevenfold T-shirt that made her rack look un-freaking-believable. Her hair fell loose around her shoulders—her bangs cut long, letting her gorgeous green eyes play peek-a-boo behind her black-framed glasses. Charlie must have gone out of her way to dress herself up, because even her nails were painted a shiny black. Fuck, I could even tell her lips were painted with her favorite watermelon flavored lip gloss.
Mason was standing too close to her, and I didn’t like the way she looked up at him. I revved my bike, and her eyes met mine through my visor. Her smile was genuine. I peeled out, and my tires crunched over the rocks and gravel onto the sand and dirt track to the starting line.
Was I finally losing my girl?
The race was about to start and my heart thudded hard in my chest. They had some freshman I never saw before waving the flag to start us off. We never raced for money or anything; we just raced for fun and did lots of daredevil freestyle jumps and stuff.
The second the flag was down, I popped a wheelie and took off like a rocket.
I flew past Joey, who leaned against his dirt bike with his arms crossed, scowling toward Mason. I mean, damn it, I didn’t even know she liked Mason like that. And, she never once mentioned it to either of us that she wanted to go to a dance.
Other riders, who joined the track with me, tried to catch up, and I just tore ass and blew them all away. Five laps later, I crossed the finish line and didn’t stop. Racing up the ramp to the beach, I sailed through the air and landed perfectly on the sand, blowing dust up everywhere. I heard the kids behind me screaming and whooping, but all I could think about was Mason standing next to my girl.
Wanting just a few minutes alone, I sped down the beach.
I was sta
ring out over the water at the setting sun when Charlie and Joey tapped my helmet. Mason was with them, too. The little butt-munch.
I took my helmet off to talk to them, not thinking about how they’d react when they saw my face…I felt the swelling of my eye. I tasted the blood from my lips. I knew how bad I looked.
“Holy crap, Jase! What happened to your face?” Charlie yelled, shoving Mason out of the way to get to me. Joey was right behind her. She had her hands (God, those hands I dreamt about touching me) on my face, so soft and gentle against my skin. I had no choice but to lean into her and rub my cheek against the palm of the hand.
I shrugged my shoulders like I didn’t look like I went for a round with a heavyweight champion, and lost. “Had a little tussle, that’s all.”
Charlie’s eyes watered and her face twisted into a grimace as she ran her thumb over the cut on my lip. It took everything in me not to dart my tongue out and lick her. Mason La Douche walked up right beside her. “Whoa, Delaney. Who beat your ass?” Then he laughed. See how La Douche fits him better that LaDoux?
I ignored him and just kept my eyes on Charlie’s. Her soft fingertips were doing a number on my insides. And, I sure as heck wanted them on other parts of my body. “Hey, Charlie. You wanna go for a ride?” I whispered, fiddling with the gearshift, revving my engine after my question.
“Charlie came here with me, Delaney.”
I leveled my eyes on him, “Did I ask you who she came here with, Peckerbreath?” I had to hand it to the idiot; he only flinched a little. Most guys get one look at my eyes and back off. I was impressed, but I was still jealous as all hell. I was actively plotting out ways to bury his body so no one would find all the pieces.
“Jase,” Charlie whispered, stepping back and squinting her eyes at me.
“Fine, fuck off then,” I croaked, and I peeled out, kicking up dust and sand in my wake as I sped away.
Ah, crap. What the hell did I just do? I never spoke to Charlie like that, well, not since I moved next door to her, and she stared at me with those impossibly beautiful green eyes and I threatened her life. I was nine; I didn’t have a clue about how to act when I saw a pretty girl. All I knew then is that she made my heart race.
Skidding down along the beach, I rode through the wet sand, probably ruining my tires, but I didn’t give a flying monkey’s uncle about that. Everything inside of me felt twisted and wrong. The wind blowing past my face felt thick and pasty, making it harder and harder to breathe. My heart started beating out of control and my skin felt weird; all tingly and raw.
After a few minutes of pushing the limits of my bike, I saw a lone headlight behind me. In the twilight that had settled over the beach, the bright light came up from behind me, fast and steady. I heard the rev of the engine over mine as the rider tried to gain on me. I shifted into a lower gear and pressed my bike to move faster.
The pursuer continued after me, matching every jump I took and met my speed. Holy Hell, it was like the damn Ghostrider. From the corner of my eye, I could see the shiny white skull and crossbones that only decorated Joey’s bike and mine. When I realized it was my best friend, I skidded to a stop, with the bike sliding out from underneath me.
Joey swerved, sliding his bike in a circle to face me and stopped in a spray of dirt and water. Jumping off his bike, he yanked off his helmet and threw it to the ground. The silhouette of long, gorgeous hair bounced free, and I couldn’t catch my breath.
Pulling the helmet slowly from my head, I watched her form walk toward me. “What the hell was that? You could have killed yourself driving like that! What are you, nuts?” I yelled, falling to my knees on the cold, wet sand.
“You’re the one who’s freaking nuts, Jase Delaney! Why did you ride off like that?” she yelled, kneeling in front of me.
“Yeah, well I asked if you wanted to go for a ride,” I mumbled.
“Yeah, Jase, then you told me to EFF off. You need another butt kicking? Because I think the one you got handed today, from God only knows who, looks bad enough,” Then, before I could say another word, her fingers were on my lips again and skating softly across my cheeks to survey the damage.
“Is he your boyfriend now, Charlie?” my voice croaked.
Her eyes shined with tears, “You got the crap beat out of you, your face is covered with blood, and you’re asking me if Mason is my boyfriend?”
“Yep. Now you know where my priorities lie.”
“Jase. Come on, tell me what happened to you,” she pleaded.
“My father.”
“Crap, Jase, really?”
And then, she pulled me into her arms, and I held onto her tightly, breathing her in. Her hands were hypnotizing and instantly calmed my rage as she raked them gently through my hair, staying there with me on the gritty rock and sand until the sounds of the races faded and everybody left.
We found Joey a while later and the three of us walked the bikes home. I didn’t let her go back to find Mason; she didn’t even mention him, anyway. And my dad, he pretended like nothing had happened.
That weekend, Charlie dragged Joey and me for a forty-minute bus ride to get to the Queens Center Mall to search for the perfect friggin' dress.
The old prissy-ass saleslady led us to the back of the shop and sat us on these deep, red, lounge chairs, where she promptly told us to remove our drinks and walked away, grabbing tons of fru-fru stuff off hangers. Taking all the dresses in one hand, she threw them to Charlie in the fitting room in front of us.
“What the heck just happened?” Joey whispered.
I shrugged, “I don’t know, but…” I pointed toward the fitting room doors and gave him a huge smile, “Charlie’s getting undressed right behind that door.” I sipped on my drink loudly. There was no way I was throwing it away just because the old hag thought she could tell me what to do.
Joey whipped his head around from the door to me and smirked, “Yes, Jase. Charlie is getting undressed right behind that door to get a DRESS to go with ANOTHER GUY to a dance!” Then, he shoved me in the arm, making me almost spill my drink all over myself.
Why couldn’t he just let me have my fantasy?
After a few minutes, we heard the latch on the fitting door unlock and out stepped Charlie. And then I did spill my drink all over me. I didn’t even move to clean it up either. I just. Sat. In. It.
She stood there with beautiful, blushing cheeks and this silky black dress that hugged every curve and line of her body. I couldn’t swallow. I couldn’t find my tongue. And, I couldn’t look away.
“So, what do you guys think?” she said, blushing a deeper red. “I really like it, but I don’t know what Mason will like.”
“Whoa, she’s smokin’ hot, Jase,” Joey mumbled under his breath.
“Ah,” I agreed.
“Guys?” Charlie asked.
“I mean, like, she’s hot-hot, Jase. And, she’s Charlie,” Joey whispered again.
“Gah-ah,” I agreed, again.
“Guys, come on. Please let me know what you think,” she said, balling her fists.
I mumbled something incoherently. I didn’t even understand what the heck I was trying to say. Joey mumbled something back to me; apparently, we spoke the same language.
“Can you two speak louder?” Charlie hissed.
“Spin around,” I said seriously.
She turned her body slowly around. She was perfect.
“Holy shit, even Charlie’s ass is hot, Jase,” Joey whispered.
“Okay, now shut up,” I whispered back.
“Hurry up, guys! We’re supposed to be going to Ava’s after this, and I really want to have your opinion!” she huffed, folding her arms across her chest. My God, that just made her chest plump up more.
Couldn't focus. Could not focus.
Joey offered me a small nudge with his elbow, lifting a brow for encouragement. Standing, he said, “Charlie, you look really...pretty...like a girl. I’m going to wait outside. Jase needs to say some stuff to you.”
r /> What? What a dick move. How the hell am I supposed to get him back for that? I thought about telling Ava Marie every sappy thing he ever told me about her.
Then, my thoughts got all jumbled and confused, because Charlie was still standing there in front of me, wearing the sexiest dress I’d ever seen. Just watching me. Waiting for me to talk.
Fuuuck. My heart started hammering hard against my ribs. I think my tongue might have been dragging on the floor as I looked her slowly up and down.
Slowly standing up from the chair, I watched her eyes widen, and her hands dropped to her sides.
I didn’t think. I didn’t plan out what to say, or what I was going to do, I just went to her.
I calmly approached her and stood so close to her body that I could almost feel the cool silkiness of the material ghosting against my clothes. “Get back in the fitting room, Charlie,” my voice rasped, hoarsely.
My body hummed with energy as I walked her backward into the small space of the room and closed the door behind us. Her back hit the wall gently and she took a long breath, making her chest almost spill out from the tightness of the dress.
I leaned my body against hers, taking both of her hands in mine and sliding them gently up the cool wall until they were on either side of her face. Her eyes looked up into mine, emerald green with flecks of blue and gold—our faces not even an inch away from each other. Her scent was heavy and thick, surrounding me, making me want to do things I had no clue how to do. But, damn I wanted them.
The warm breaths from her mouth fell against my skin and I closed my eyes, just to savor the intensity of her. Leaning my head closer to hers, I ran my nose along her jaw, nuzzling my face in her hair. Her breath pitched and quickened; her hands tightened in mine as her body arched off the wall to press against me.
“Jase,” she gasped, in a low, husky whisper.