If someone thought she was kinky and word got around about that, she’d never live it down.
I need to be careful.
And she wasn’t even kinky. Kink-friendly, absolutely. She’d even admit to being kink-curious at this point.
“I get why he did it,” she added. “I just wish he’d felt safe enough with me.”
“It’s not about safety,” Reed said. “In his case, he was very protective of you. He didn’t want to do anything he thought would stress you out.”
“He always did look out for me. Even when we were kids.”
“Never doubt how much he loved you,” Lyle said.
“I don’t,” she quietly said.
* * * *
She had dinner nearly ready when the two men arrived Sunday night. Reed had been out of touch all day because of his charter, but Lyle had texted with her.
Jenny, Tilly, and Eliza all expressed their enthusiasm over Vanessa having the men over for dinner.
And even Carlo was thrilled to see them, running to fetch a talky-wubbie when they arrived.
Her morning had been filled with doing mundane chores, like laundry and scooping Carlo’s poop out of the backyard, getting things ready for her return to work tomorrow, and avoiding Tony’s room.
She wasn’t ready to sort through his things.
She’d placed a short note on his FetLife profile early that morning and had checked for and replied to messages on FetLife all throughout the afternoon, both on her account and his.
That was all she could emotionally handle.
And when she ran out for groceries, she stopped by an office supply store and picked up a couple of spare thumb drives, one to give to the organizer of the memorial next Saturday, and one for Tilly, who wanted to do something similar.
With a score of new friends suddenly in her life, Vanessa had decided maybe the best course of action was to emotionally coast for a while. They were all telling her the exact same thing—there was no rush, that she should be taking care of herself right now, and that her brother wouldn’t want her to wall herself up in a protective shell and shut everyone out.
All truths.
And now…
Now here were two men kneeling in her hallway and playing with Carlo.
She could even lie to herself if she needed another excuse and say she was doing it for the dog’s sake. Tony had friends dropping by all the time, several times a week, either in passing, to go somewhere else, or to eat with them.
There was no reason why she should stop doing that now, with the friends now hers by inheritance.
When they finally sat down to eat, both men wore inviting smiles. “This smells great,” Lyle said.
“My cooking skills are a little rusty,” she admitted. “I hope it’s okay.”
Reed nodded after taking a bite of the fish. “It’s wonderful.”
“Oh, if you like hot sauce, I have a bunch to choose from.”
“We do,” Lyle said, “but I don’t need any for this.”
“Good, remind me, I’ll give you all of it to take with you. It was…I don’t use it.”
Tonight, she didn’t want to cry. She wanted to try to seek some normalcy.
“Well,” Reed slowly said, “we could leave it here in your fridge for when we eat here.” He arched an eyebrow at her, sending her pulse into a skittish gallop.
She swallowed hard, liking the implication behind that statement. “Do you think you’ll be eating here enough to use it?” she carefully asked.
“I really hope so,” Reed said, meeting her gaze head-on. “But I think that’s more up to you to decide than us, isn’t it?”
Her mouth went dry. She nodded.
Lyle smiled and reached over to pat her hand. “He’s a flirt. I should have warned you.”
“That’s okay,” she said, returning her gaze to Reed’s. “I don’t mind. I like it.”
Reed grinned. “Good. Then I’ll feel free to carry on until you tell me otherwise.” He waggled his eyebrows at her.
Holy hell, was she actually getting turned on by this?
It shocked her to realize she was.
“Anyone want some wine?” she asked, getting up to head for the kitchen. “I’ve got plenty of moscato.”
* * * *
She limited herself to one actual wine glass of wine and noted the men did, too. When they finished dinner, they insisted on helping her clean up the kitchen. With that finished, they settled on the lanai, dusk wafting in around them with a humid, purply light. Carlo had already been out again. He now lay on the pool deck with a wubbie in his mouth, hopeful that someone would try to take it from him.
“We spent a lot of time out here,” she said.
“It’s peaceful,” Lyle said.
The backyard was shaded by a large oak tree in the far corner that helped block the hottest of the afternoon sun. The eight-foot privacy stockade fence was barely visible in places, between tall shrubs and jasmine vines that grew on and in front of it.
“Would you believe I didn’t use the pool here a lot until Tony moved in?” she said. “I paid a service to take care of it, but it didn’t get much use.”
“Why not?” Reed asked.
She shrugged. “I just…didn’t. Tony used it more than I did. Hell, he’d just shuck his clothes and jump in and skinny dip if it was the two of us.”
“Stupid question, then,” Lyle asked. “Why’d you buy a house with a pool?”
“It was a good price at the time. The condo I was renting, my new neighbors were a very sweet and practically deaf retired couple from Michigan, who shouted at each other to be heard over the volume of their TV. I decided if I was going to pay money every month to live somewhere, I should be able to decide the level of noise pollution I wanted to tolerate. So, I moved.”
“Smart,” Lyle said.
“No, smart would have been me dragging him to the doctor a week sooner than I did and not being so busy with my own work that I didn’t even notice how sick he was until that night.” She stared at her hands in the deepening gloom. “I’ll never stop feeling guilty over that. I don’t care what anyone says, I was so wrapped up in my job that I didn’t pay attention to how bad off he was.”
Silence fell, broken only by the sound of the pool pump kicking on and neighborhood noises, the occasional car passing on the street out front.
“I don’t have any advice to give you,” Reed said. “I wish I did. I still say it’s not your fault. No one blames you.”
“Not a single damn person,” Lyle added.
“Sorry. Didn’t mean to be a downer.” She leaned forward in her chair and stared at the pool. “Anyone want dessert? I bought a key lime pie.”
“In a little bit,” Reed said, also leaning forward in his chair. “I was thinking about taking a dip in the pool.”
Lyle chuckled. “I’m in.”
Before she realized what was happening, the men had stood, stripped, and jumped into the deep end of the pool.
She sat there, frozen, both by the fact that they’d done it…and that they were hung.
Carlo lifted his head, his wubbie falling from his mouth as he whined at the sight of his two new friends in the water.
Before she realized what she was doing, she found herself standing, stripping, and then cannonballed into the deep end next to them.
She broke the surface to the sounds of their warm laughter. She swam over to them, their arms opening to her and around each other.
It felt right sliding her arms around their waists.
“See?” Reed said, his blue eyes looking like sapphire in the dim light. “Isn’t this fun?”
She nodded.
Then, before she lost her nerve, she leaned in and kissed him, relieved that he didn’t miss a beat and immediately kissed her back. She didn’t know, didn’t care what she was doing.
She was feeling and going with that.
While she was kissing Reed, Lyle shifted positions slightly and started kissing the side o
f her neck. “What do you want tonight?” Lyle softly asked.
Reed let her answer. “I…I don’t know.”
She did know that both their cocks were now hard and had brushed against her a couple of times.
And yes, she was turned on by it.
Lyle gently caught her chin and turned her face so she had to look at him. “How long has it been since you’ve been with anyone?”
Now she felt a little embarrassed. “Five years,” she muttered.
“Mmm,” Reed said. “Then we’ll go slow for tonight. Just a little taste.” He started nibbling on the other side of her neck while he took her hand and placed it on her cock.
Her clit throbbed, at the feel of it, the size of it when her fingers wrapped around his girth.
Lyle took her other hand and placed it on his, too.
Then, Lyle slipped one arm around her back. “Trust us,” he whispered, kissing her again.
She did, floating back and trying to ignore the way Carlo was now whining.
She closed her eyes, enjoying Lyle’s kiss, moaning when someone’s hand slipped between her legs and started playing with her clit. Two more hands, one on each breast, teased her there. She’d guess Lyle between her legs and Reed up top. Meanwhile, she started slowly stroking their cocks, their hungry moans firing her own need.
“That’s it,” Reed whispered in her ear. “Such a good girl.”
Something inside her broke free. She felt wild and untethered, not an entirely unpleasant feeling, especially considering she’d never felt like this before. Her fingers grew more sure on their cocks, working in time with their thrusts as the finger between her legs started moving faster, faster still.
It was a good thing Lyle was kissing her when her orgasm burst free. She let out a crying moan, pleasure, passion, emotion—she didn’t know or care—that he swallowed with his mouth over hers.
And then Carlo the cock-blocking cocker started barking, apparently worried by her response, making both men laugh. She was still trying to get her wits about her, the hand in her pussy falling still but not moving, as Lyle broke their kiss and said, “We’ll play with you later, buddy. This is our playtime.”
* * * *
Lyle hadn’t been sure what Reed was up to by suggesting a skinny dip, but he wasn’t going to argue with him.
This had certainly not been his predicted outcome, but no complaints there.
What Lyle wanted to do was scoop her up, carry her inside, and spend the night making love to her and keep her anchored firmly there, with them, in the present, without a chance for her pain or grief or anything else to burrow in and steal her from them.
So she wasn’t angles and bones. She was sweet, rounded curves, a gorgeous body he could hold onto and not worry about hurting her in the bad ways. She wasn’t fragile, she was real and warm and willing.
They worked their way over to the edge of the pool where Carlo ran around to check on them. Vanessa still hadn’t opened her eyes, and she still stroked their cocks.
With Carlo settling down a little, Reed took over kissing her, one of his hands sliding over the top of Lyle’s. Lyle traded off with him, moving his now free hand to cup and play with her other breasts. She softly moaned, her fingers deliciously tightening around their cocks, and Lyle suspected Reed had worked at least one finger inside her pussy.
No, they wouldn’t try to fuck her tonight. Not unless she wanted it and brought it up. They’d both be more than happy to settle for handjobs from her.
This was far more than he’d ever expected, especially this soon. Then again, they did say grief-sex was a very common phenomenon. A way to rail against death, to try to forget, to try to heal.
Within a few minutes, she was rocking in the water, her strokes faster, firmer on their cocks as she drew closer to coming again.
“Be a good girl and give us another one,” Lyle murmured in her ear, quickly cuing in on what Reed had said to her earlier. “We’re going to stay here until you do, so you might as well be our good girl and do it.”
Reed’s hand between her legs sped up, and then she let out another of those absolutely gorgeous moans that finished Lyle off. He released her breast, wrapped his hand around hers around his cock, and thrust, hard and fast, his orgasm exploding and finishing before she’d even stopped moaning. Then he reached across her body and grabbed her hand around Reed’s cock, squeezing, urging her to stroke faster, harder, the way he knew his partner loved, pleased when Reed quickly started moaning as he, too, orgasmed.
They stood there, silent, still for a moment. Then Reed wrapped his arms around her, and Lyle, and leaned in to kiss Lyle.
“I have a feeling,” Lyle said, “we’re not going to have to fake many things around Tilly and Eliza.”
She shook her head. “No,” she said, her voice sounding thick. “I think that’s not going to be a problem.”
Chapter Sixteen
Monday morning, Vanessa drove to the store in Sarasota that served as her primary home base.
Her brain felt filled with a fog of confusion.
They’d stayed in the pool for a while, talking, silent, her having another healing cry that was even better with the feel of two warm bodies gently sandwiching her between them.
She felt drained in the good way.
And she agreed with them that whatever this was? She wanted to pursue it.
She’d thought they’d try to talk her into sex in bed, which she would have been great with, but by ten o’clock when they’d done nothing more than dry off and snuggle together, the three of them, naked on the couch to watch TV and with a sheet draped over all of them, she’d felt a peace settle over her.
“There’s no rush,” Reed said.
“Life’s short,” she countered.
Lyle offered her a playful smile. “At least we’re not.”
“Heh,” Reed said.
Lyle’s smile faded. “How about we come over tomorrow night after work. We’ll cook you dinner, we’ll play with Carlo…and then we’ll see what happens.”
“I don’t have a charter on Tuesday,” Reed said. “I can stay later.”
“Or all night, if you want,” Lyle said.
“Can we do this again?” she asked, almost reluctant they’d say no.
“We can do whatever you want to do,” Lyle said.
“Anything you want to do,” Reed added.
Before they left, they both took turns kissing her good-bye at the door, long, slow, deep kisses, romantic kisses, that stole her breath.
“For tomorrow,” Lyle said, “promise me you’ll text or call me if you need me. He’ll be out of contact most of the day. Even if it’s just you need to hear a friendly voice. Okay?”
She nodded. “Okay.”
He smiled. “Good girl.”
Something about that twisted her innards, in the good ways.
All the good ways.
Could she do what some people did? She didn’t know. She didn’t think she was a submissive or a masochist, but then again, she’d never dreamed she’d have two of the best orgasms of her life out in her pool while jerking off two well-hung hunks, either, so she wouldn’t say never.
Now she was left trying to drag her mind into work mode when all she could think about was how damn good it’d felt having two of Reed’s fingers fucking her pussy the night before, followed by her using her vibrator on herself—twice—after they’d left.
She couldn’t wait to see what would happen next.
Life is short, and they make me smile. I’m an adult, I don’t have any obligations to anyone, and they’re okay with this. I’m not going to fight it when there’s no reason to.
By eleven that morning, she’d texted Lyle several times, each time right after someone from corporate or one of her stores had called to talk with her, and then added a condolence on top of whatever business matter they’d needed to discuss.
An immediate text to Lyle after each of those calls would be returned with calm reassurances from him to ke
ep thinking about last night, about them coming over tonight, that all she had to do was get through the next few hours, and she’d be able to let go with them.
And the one text from him that sent her bolting for the bathroom for the good kind of cry—
I’m so proud of you for hanging in there today. You can do this.
She’d never lacked for love or support from her parents, who were also still calling and texting to check up on her. They’d always expressed to her how proud they were of her and her achievements.
But so had Tony.
No one but herself had ever hung it over her head that she hadn’t pursued and earned a four-year college degree. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t feel a little less-than for it, however. That she hadn’t been able to scrape the time and money together, to focus a little less on her job and more on school, to get more than just a two-year degree.
But throughout the years, even when their parents moved when she was only twenty-one and already living on her own, Tony had made a point of telling her how proud he was of her. He’d sit and ask her about her day, listen to her stories of work, and be engaged. Even when they were kids and she was a pesky little sister.
Even her last “boyfriend,” to use the term loosely, had never seemed like he was interested in anything more than sex or whatever she could do for him, yet he’d wax on, boring the pants off her about his job at a dealership.
She was more than a little shocked when her boss walked in just as she was getting ready to head out to pick up some lunch.
Which she’d planned to bring back and eat at her desk in the back of the store while she worked.
“Stu? What are you doing here?” Stuart Wiselan was a corporate vice-president, in charge of Florida.
He pulled up a chair in front of her desk and sat. “I drove in late last night and spent the night here. I saw you were planning on coming back to work today and wanted to see you.”
She felt a chill building inside her. “Yeah?”