It took me an instant to realize that Vade was now standing next to me.
“Rise,” Vade said with a deep velvet tone.
Silas did so gracefully, slowly. His eyes rose to meet Vade’s; in them now was deep respect.
Vade extended his hand and Silas took it. After a moment of staring into Silas, Vade spoke again. “I am in your debt. The Creator chose wisely when He declared who Monroe’s guardian would be.”
Silas’ eyes shifted between me and Vade. “That, he did,” he said with a bit of a sly grin. “I have words that need to be said,” Silas said as he released Vade’s hand.
“And they will be heard,” Vade said with utter confidence.
Silas nodded once, and then vanished.
I felt Vade’s hand slide into mine. “Ready?”
“I’m afraid,” I whispered.
“Why?” he asked in a tone laced with deep concern.
“I have watched the Reaper tell many that their deeds are done, that it is time to move on. I have fulfilled my purpose. My essence not only created the perfect weapon, but the perfect child. My line is stronger now than ever… he may very well tell me that my time is over.”
“Then he will accept me as well.”
“Vade—”
He stopped me before I could go on. “Glory, in part you are right. One life has ended for the both of us, but a new one will begin. Our work has just begun.”
“Then I shall hope for mercy.”
“Speak the truth to him, and you cannot fail.”
Nervously, I nodded once. He moved us to the front steps of our mansion in the sky. Rasp and Mazing were waiting there.
Vade tenderly kissed my forehead before he took the first stone that led downward. Mazing and I took the second, Rasp the final one.
Mazing and I were cloaked from the rest of the world, but I knew Vade’s decent into the Veil would not go unnoticed, that when or if we returned there would be others waiting on us.
Chapter Nineteen
The descent into the lower levels of The Realm was slow, giving me much time alone with my beloved First. Mazing seemed calmer now than she had in eons. I wondered if it was the awakening of Silas that had done that, or the revenge she had gotten against that petal named Cadence—or maybe, just maybe she could feel the love that her queen now could feel.
“You look well,” I said tenderly.
A quiet smile came to her lips. “I’m happy for you.”
“I really thought it was the end,” I said, appraising her deep auburn eyes.
“In a sense it was, I suppose. I feared not, though, not when I saw the Fated below.”
“They are strong,” I granted.
“Vicious.”
That made me smile. “I truly hope we can fight with them.”
“Agreed…”
“Do you feel peace now that you have had your vengeance?” I questioned.
She moved her head from side to side. “Cadence was a puppet for evil kings. My vengeance is not over.” She breathed in deeply. “His scent is stronger now than ever before.”
“And how does that make you feel?”
“I feel everything.”
“Do the bad emotions outweigh the good ones?”
“Depends on the moment,” she said with a smirk.
I glanced at Vade. “Do you know what he said to me?”
“Besides that he loves you?”
My soul seized. Hearing them say such words was going to take some getting used to. “You heard about that, huh?”
“Try felt. Every soul felt it; the Earth danced.”
“Well, at least it didn’t crumble.”
That made her laugh, loud enough that Vade glanced over his shoulder at us. Holding his gaze, I spoke. “He said easy come, easy go. That he wanted it to be hard to convince me to love him so that he knew I would never leave.”
Mazing was utterly confused by Vade’s reasoning, which was a good sign. “It has already been hard for you to find peace with the one you share your heart and soul with; don’t make it any harder on yourself in the future.”
“Unless you have the power to erase a really old memory, I don’t know that I can vow that to you. I never felt pain like I did when I saw what I saw. I could never touch that body or those lips without seeing that Creator-forsaken petal. That may be why, if he is alive, he is hiding from me.”
“Ill will with the vessel, not the soul?” I questioned.
Mazing questioned me with her eyes, but my expression was not offering any clues as to where my mind was.
“In a sense. Our time was short; intense, but short. I don’t know that I ever really knew him. The man I held was self-loathing, wished for death, and showed no loyalty.”
I smirked. That was not the man Silas was now.
“Time not only tells, but reveals all.”
“I suppose.” Her eyes drifted over me slowly. “It has been an honor to be your First.”
“Why do I feel like you’re telling me goodbye?”
“I kinda am.”
“Excuse me?”
She shrugged her shoulders as she glanced away. “We know this game, this walk we are about to take. The Reaper has no reason to give me a stay.”
“He has every reason.”
“No, he doesn’t. The Reaper lets people stay because they want to be with people they love, or because they need to protect them. The Reaper knows I am not needed to protect you, that Vade would do so, if not Rasp. He knows I have left no one behind. He will tell me to move on.”
I knew the Reaper well, and in some ways I knew the Creator well. Mazing may not know it, but she was keeping Silas alive, and Silas was dear enough to be chosen to protect the first child of metallic energy. Mazing had a precious fate before her, but she couldn’t see it because she was full of wrath...because she was just as I was.
That thought made me all the more angry at myself when I thought of the time I had wasted, how I could have very easily wasted so much more if the Reaper hadn’t kicked me out of death temporarily. That act forced me to see what I had taken for granted, forced me to see my own demons and move past them.
“He will speak the truth to you, just as he does to every soul.”
“Like I said, it has been a pleasure.”
This must be how my Creator felt. He always gave me all the signs, all the words He needed to in order for me to see my path, yet I remained blind.
I was going to lead Mazing the same way He led me. I was not going to lay out her fate before her or tell her what to do and how to do it. It was her choice either to follow or ignore her destiny, and I knew that once she saw what she was chosen for that she would see how her pain was a very small price to pay for the gifts life had prepared for her.
“We will leave this Veil together,” I said sternly.
I could feel the instant comfort my words gave her. She was so undeniably faithful to me, to her race.
The stones landed on the first level of The Realm. Vade did not glance back at me. We were on stage now. I could not see what was around us, but I could sense every line. I could sense a recent war.
We moved through The Realm, then entered the Veil. There, the souls I had seen before, the trapped dead, were utterly aware. It was like they were waiting for us, that they knew that the actions that were about to occur, in time, would either set them free or imprison them forevermore.
I held my head high, offering no promises, for the choice was not mine at the moment; it belonged to my dear confidant, the Reaper.
From that point, we manifested to the doors of the glorious cathedral. I was now standing at the place where I had watched countless souls pass. It seemed all the more intimidating from this vantage.
I dared not look into Vade’s eyes as he and Rasp halted at the doors. I couldn’t, for I knew that my foolish thoughts would convince me that it was the last time, that my reprieve had served its purpose. Vade knew I loved him, and now my line was raised to a more powerful existence. In a sense, by feeli
ng that sacred emotion I ensured that my daughter would forever be protected.
On any other night, there would be a massive line of souls, a line that would still be growing when the Reaper left his throne. But tonight, the cathedral was empty.
Mazing and I walked gracefully slow to his throne.
I stared into the blinding light of the Reaper with each step I took. I let all my immoralities pass through my thoughts, all the moments that wrath had blinded me from. I let my last days vibrate through my thoughts. I wanted the Reaper to know that I had awakened. At the very last moment, I had awakened to the gifts that were always mine to claim.
When we reached him, we both bowed to one knee, not letting our eyes meet his.
“Rise, my dear friend,” he said to me.
I did so with hesitation. I let my thoughts plead with him to see Mazing as me, for him to know that I needed her for a million and one reasons. But then I realized that he very well knew that, that at this moment he was going to have me move on and allow her to stay and love the man that was guarding my daughter.
“I expected you long ago,” the Reaper said with a bit of a mischievous grin.
“I had to overcome dark emotions to understand why I was released.”
“And why is it that I released you at this juncture?”
“I can only hope it was because you knew the lessons that I was meant to learn here were near completion.”
“What lessons were those?”
“That any existence is too short to hide emotions that create our being.”
His grin widened as he leaned forward.
“Has Glory discovered what her soul is made of? What all souls are made of?”
“Long ago. But my internal war distracted me from the obvious.”
“How fare thee with that war?”
“The girl within and the sovereign are one.”
“I see. So you feel that your journey is complete?”
“I wish it not to be. I wish to live this existence once more so that I can experience it as it was meant to be.”
“Glory,” he said tenderly. “You cannot live your life over.”
I felt my soul sink.
“That saddens you?” the Reaper asked me.
“It does. I have lost much.”
“On the contrary, your thoughts state that you have gained much.”
“That, I have.”
He settled into his throne as he thought deeply. “I do not feel that you are truly awakened.”
“I feel love. I love Vade, our daughter, my line, and each soul I was designed to protect.”
“Ah, but that is my point. You were designed to love. To guide.”
I had no words to offer him.
“And you have not done that.”
“I am guilty of that. I led them the wrong way. I understand that,” I admitted.
“You have not led them at all.”
That was harsh.
“I’m not speaking of your line or the kings you tried to sway.”
I furrowed my brow. Perfect. I was blind again. At the one moment I should not be.
“Seven. Seven that will be coupled with seven more, and rise. They need their queen.”
“The seven lights.” It was more of a question than a statement.
“The seven loves that will rule and protect our tomorrow.”
This was truly hard for me to understand. For the longest time, I did not think there would be a tomorrow. The Fall had closed its passage not long after I became a sovereign, and since that time our reality had grown darker. Today, this universe, this reality was at its darkest hour. We had brought about our own extinction. And in time, because we had done so, our twin reality would also perish.
Knowing that there was now metallic energy, that there were already souls fighting the kings that had incited this downfall had given me hope, hope that had no reason to exist before this day.
“If you grant me my stay, I will call them each home. Together, we will reach our victory swiftly.”
“That, you cannot do.”
My soul was starting to shatter. I dared to look over my shoulder at Vade. I had to look at him once more before the Reaper pushed me into my next life and found a suitable replacement for my failed life plan.
“If it were that simple, Glory, it would have been designed to happen in such a manner. These seven loves do not need to be told what to do or how to do it. They feel it within, and the paths they take to reach those points will allow them to embrace the reign they were chosen for.”
“I want to see my daughter fulfill her fate. I want to see this universe restored. And I want to be a part of every step.”
“By loving and living your own life, you can do such things. The universe is well aware of what it needs and will guide you like the wind to where you need to be when you need to be there.”
“I can do that with great honor,” I swore.
“You can aid these seven when the wind calls you to, love Vade, your daughter, and your line.”
“I can.”
“Do you plan to seek vengeance?”
“I have a great desire to avenge many, but I understand that there very well may be those that are already chosen to bring such karma.”
“Patience. Have you found that?”
It was not wise to lie to the Reaper.
“I have not.”
“The lack of such emotion leaves you hungry for a victory?”
“That it does.”
“Then in some way it leaves you capable of leading the seven loves.”
I didn’t really understand that.
“You balance Vade.”
“I push him.”
“I assure you, he does not need to be pushed. You may be able to see across dimensions, but the man that holds your heart can see across time, he can see every reaction to each action—and therefore, he has patience. He can watch agony, for he knows that once the hell is over the lesson is in place and bliss is born.”
I knew he was telling me that my impatience would bring more harm than good, that Vade could guide not only our daughter, but also these seven loves.
“You are needed, Glory,” the Reaper stated evenly. “These seven will find common ground with you, and when you finally learn patience they will in turn learn that from you.”
“Are you restoring my life?”
“It was never taken.”
“Excuse me?”
“You wished to be here, to protect your line, your First, and teach Vade a lesson that he did not need to learn.”
I was really lost now.
“He loved you. He spoke the words a million times over in his mind as he held you. Absence would not make him see how desperately he needed you. He already knew that.”
Now I felt guilt, horrible guilt.
“You needed a place to go and think and grow. You had always been in the care of another, the care of a horrible mother, then the care of Vade. You had never once been in a place or position where there was no one to guide you. Here, you guided Mazing, you protected The Fall, and you realized that no matter how much time had passed that you could not forget the likes of Vade, the other half of your soul.”
“That, I did.”
“If you had ever asked me to return, I would have guided you to your home personally.”
I suppose I never once asked to move on. I assumed I was imprisoned by my choices.
“You sacrificed the dead you adore for the sake of the lessons I took so long to learn?”
“And one of your seven has already begun to return them to me.”
Now I was really puzzled.
“Your army is fighting, and they need a leader. A silent, strong leader.”
“How silent?”
If I was free, if I was never really imprisoned, I wanted to make sure that there was no path that I should avoid to keep me from truly dying in some distant future.
The Reaper smirked. “You are the queen of wrath for a reason,
my sweet Glory. Do not let that girl inside loose, only to kill another part of you. Become both, rule the way your soul tells you to. Seek what your soul wishes you to.”
I bowed slightly, telling him I would do just that.
“I will warn you of this: this is a vast web you are vowing to untangle. So vast that even I cannot clearly see a rapid escape from it.”
“A web that will teach me patience?”
“Very much so.”
“If I had never perished, that is also true of my First?”
“I’m afraid not,” he said in the ghost of a whisper. “Rise,” the Reaper said to Mazing.
She did so gracefully, which was hard to do considering every muscle in her body was not only flexed, but trembling slightly.
“You feel your fate is complete?” he said to her.
“My queen is safe. I have a debt to pay.”
“What debt is that?”
Mazing struggled to find the words. “I was disloyal.”
“Yet, your heart sought someone who was in fact from your line.”
“I’m aware now, but not then. I openly sinned.”
“As each soul does.”
“I was disloyal to him.”
“How so?”
“I never once released my emotions to him; therefore, I did not trust him. That lack of trust led me here.”
“I see.” The Reaper weighed her words deeply. “Anger,” he mused. A smirk came to his gleaming image. “You are reprieved.”
Mazing gasp, then swayed.
I knew that Mazing was needed to love Silas, to keep him alive so he could protect my daughter, but she did not. Her emotions were of anger right now.
Deep down, she had wanted to run from the scent of Colton, wanted to hide in death like I had done, but the Reaper would not allow that. She was angry right now, an anger that she would forevermore have to fight with when it came to the memory of Colton. Oh, if she only knew what great things were in store for her.
The Reaper stood, a sign that we should bow once more. As we did, he stepped closer, and when I felt his hand on my head I felt my power, the power that he had harbored during my brief reprieve, restoring to me, waving across my soul.
It was not returned to me in the same manner in which it was taken. The wrath, the intense pain of a past I could not change, the raw impatience had vanished from it. It was as if the Reaper had washed those stains away, and now my power as a sovereign was restored to me in its purest form, the form in which it was given to me by the Creator himself.